life is

it's never what you think it's for

[crushribbons]

@stahcollectah / @guymontspellingbee / @tankgirlfriend also xx

[fruitsoftheape100]

No Homo We Smokin Penisas

[destikneeschild]

I am having a full throttle giggle attack…I am dying. I need to get off this app & get chicken & pasta stat!!!!

[fakelaurent-deactivated20191028]

So so so fucking real

[kristina100000]

love me love me say that you love me fool me fool me go on and fool me

[guymontspellingbee]

I can be Mr. Shit | Taskmaster Australia 1.09

[vermilionstarlight]

age regressing to 2 years old but i was an especially erudite and articulate baby so you don't even notice

[crushribbons]

if anyone ever touches a tank girl remake and it’s not with my pitch-top-one-hundred-thousand-percent-perfect casting of amy taylor as tankie and nina oyama as jet girl i will be burning down everyone involved’s homes

[jame7t]

you are always telling lies

elephants are hunted for their jumping slime, which is used to produce trampolines and the runways of airplanes

[crushribbons]

challengers (2024)

[crushribbons]

someone tell my white ass why @safarikalamari is THIS good to me

[aeli-noir]

[crushribbons]

every time i can’t afford something i unfortunately have to say to myself “jealousy professor” and unfortunately every time it works

[crushribbons]

“frasier? do you really think we’ve lost the taste for the simple things in life? steak…potatoes….fixins?”

[bouncykhotchillipeppers]

underrated jackass bit is knoxville vs the skunk. simple yet effective.

[tankgirlfriend]

#same, dark shark

[guiltfactory-moved]

guy who gets horny at the idea of crashing into a wall with a tunnel painted on it. guy who gets hard thinking about running off the side of a cliff and hovering in the air for a second until he looks down and realizes the ground is gone. guy who jerks off at the thought of little birds circling his head after getting whacked by a big colorful mallet. guy who comes when he imagines sitting up after a piano falls on him and smiling with a mouth full of piano keys and they each play a note as they fall out one by one.

[crushribbons]

best friend is in town and i’m trying to be gleefully offline but she made me go see the new jackass and i hated every second of it then i thought about it and now i get it and i also want to tie johnny knoxville to a chair

[snoozlebee]

Imo phantom of the paradise should get a baffling and terrible sequel a la love never dies