tanya

obsessed with literature and finding the point of living carpe diem cubitum eamus

[cubitum1eamus]

ABOUT ME :

my name is tatiana but I go by tanya

im 19 years old

I'm polish (kocham pierogi)

my main hobbies are : knitting, crocheting, baking, reading, writing, and photography

my favourite music artists : tvgirl, queen, chappell roan, octrain, lana del rey, David Bowie, mitski, hozier, mother mother, frank Sinatra, the neighbourhood and so much more , I also love classical music

my favourite authors : Donna Tartt, fyodor Dostoyevsky, Edgar Allen Poe, Agatha Christie, Oscar Wilde

some fun facts about me : I love grandpa sweaters, I'm a theatre kid, I love musicals, my favourite actor is Cillian Murphy, IM INTO NERDS LIKE OMFG, my favourite books are the secret history and the goldfinch and dead poets society,

[chemerges]

[chemerges]

[freeshavacado]

you can only reblog this today

[everybodyhatesari]

Well yea duh

[cubitum1eamus]

holy trinity

[tootiredtobekind]

[parapetowki]

'małomiasteczkowy' feels like june, countryside roads, biking, fresh air, watching fireflies, and those tymbark bottles that have caps with silly little messages, and nothing can replicate that feeling - ZNOWU JADĘ DO CIEBIE SAM !!!!!!!!!

[eryn-m-lauriel]

The other day i was thinking abt tsh getting a movie adaptation and had the idea that it would have to be actually two movies that end and start with Bunny being pushed.

The first one is your typical DA movie with maybe even hints of magical realism to further illustrate how unreliable Richard is as a narrator. Then the push happens and it's still pretty, but the color kinda drains in the last slowed shot of Bunny falling.

The second movie picks up right after that with the push scene, but now it's realistic. No color filters. Barely any makeup on the actors and all that. No fluent speaking/perfect accents of different languages. Just raw footage with maybe even some messed up lines.

[pawnyouoff]

donna 😭😭😭 donna pls 😭😭😭 donna tartt 😭😭😭😭 please its been 😭😭😭 10 years 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 donna tartt come back 😭😭😭😭😭 please where's the new book 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[aro-with-bad-aim]

“doing this to be like Henry winter!!” “Studying to make Henry winter proud!!” “Henry winter core!!” “I read *insert classical text* I’m so Henry winter”!!! Shut the fuck up. You are not Henry winter. You are Richard Papen. Be quiet Richard Papen.

[cubitum1eamus]

real, we all are like Richard, trying so hard to be like them, to be like Henry, trying to impress people when in reality we're like Richard

[nyctophilia-35]

[ahududulugazoz]

[idkaugust]

Going feral over these BTS photos. He wasn’t covered in blood enough in the show

[secrethistorymylove]

headcanon about Henry’s mother and his family.

(Sorry if this coincides with someone's thoughts that have already been voiced.)

If I remember correctly Henry's mother came from a wealthy family. She married his father when she was still a young girl who had just graduated from high school, as this was in the 1950s, when such marriages between wealthy families were common. I believe that Henry's father was significantly older than her, perhaps by around ten years.

I think she gave birth to Henry early as well, as Bunny says to Richard that Henry's mother is VERY YOUNG. Also, Bunny mentions that in his opinion Henry's mother uses too much makeup, although she dresses with taste. I could explain it this way. She was a young girl who gave birth in a year when bright colors and dresses were in bloom, there was Twiggy and her unusual style and makeup, it was a new style of music. And all this time, Henry's mother, being a blooming girl, was forced to raise a child and live with a cold and strict husband (which is exactly how I imagine Henry's father). I think this is why she wore a lot of makeup and could afford to do so specifically after Henry left for college, as it symbolized that she was once again on her own and could finally feel young. And this was also the beginning of the 1980s, when even brighter colors, more stylish makeup, and interesting hairstyles became fashionable. Yes, it's nice to wear a fur coat and dress in Chanel, but being a trophy wife gets tiring. She didn't use makeup to hide her flaws, no. Bunny described her as a very beautiful woman, and Henry inherited her looks.

I'm also sure that she was really raising Henry, and not hiring a babysitter. Bunny said Henry was a favorite child. That's why I can imagine how she took care of him after he was in a car accident. And I'm afraid to imagine how her heart broke when Henry was in the hospital at the end of the book and lived out his last hours. It was Henry's mother who was the only one of his family by his side during his most difficult periods of life.

When I think of Henry's mother, I have a clichéd image of a bird trapped in a golden cage. I can't imagine that she ever lived for herself. In my mind, she will always be a young girl who had to meet someone's expectations, but no one ever considered that she had feelings and desires of her own. Henry was her solace. And then Henry was gone. It was the final straw.

[prmcafwh]

So anyway. They're all at least 60 by now.

Camilla stayed single all her life. She lives alone in her grandmother's old house in Virginia, and sits in the rocking chair at night and stares at the fireplace, smoking a Lucky Strike with old country songs murmuring on the radio, and tries to read Jane Eyre, but her thoughts always wander. To Henry. To Charles. To what once was.

Charles never did move out of the trailer he used to share with his girlfriend. Francis's yellowed, unopened letter is still lying somewhere deep in a drawer. He gets the odd job sometimes, washing cars or dishes or toilets. All the little money he has goes to liquor. What more does he need, anyway? His only aim in life is to forget. The owner of his usual place lets him stay past closing time sometimes, and play the out of tune piano, and slurred notes of Chopin fill the empty place, and he imagines they're all still there, in the library, where they can hear him play. But when he's finished, the lazy applause of his friends and the bright smile of his sister fail to appear.

The older Francis gets, the younger the men he goes home with. The doorman sees a new small nineteen year old blond leaving the building every morning, some looking shameful, others almost proud. He meticulously keeps up his socialite facade in public, but as soon as he's home alone, the mask is dropped, the cigarette is lit, and he sits in the windowsill chainsmoking. Looking at the sky. Wondering where Henry is. Wondering what could have been. Wondering why he's still here. His bright red hair slowly but surely fades to gray.

Richard habitually stays up till four or five, looking at the TV without watching it, taking sleeping pills without going to sleep, wandering the city for hours without going anywhere. He leaves coffee stains on the papers he grades. He lets dirty dishes pile up for weeks. Henry still visits him in his sleep, but his shadow vanishes when he wakes. He was born alone in California, and there he will die alone.

[robintera]

it is important to put yourself in the right mindset for assignments

[kosmogrl]

[cubitum1eamus]

me