Curated Devotional

suspending our need of answers for our deeper need of Jesus the ask page

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How do you know God exists? Is all of this prayer & evangelism for nothing?

The Question – How do you know God exists? I've been struggling a lot recently with believing whether He exists at all and all this prayer and evangelism is for nothing. 

Morning Pages – Take 3 to 10 minutes to free write or type whatever’s on your mind, just to clear some space or to ponder the question 

Silence – Take two minutes to sit in silence, create a timer on your phone if you find it challenging to be still at first. Let yourself open up to God and remember he is already with you. 

Scripture – “The God who made the world and everything in it is the Lord of heaven and earth and does not live in temples built by human hands. And he is not served by human hands, as if he needed anything. Rather, he himself gives everyone life and breath and everything else. From one man (Abraham) he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands. God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from any one of us. ‘For in him we live and move and have our being.’ As some of your own poets have said, ‘We are his offspring.’ Acts 17:24-28 

Reflection – Louie CK on the “forever-empty”  0:55 – 3:15 

Poets and prophets in the past were known to be the ones to teach the people what life is really like. Many have drawn the connection to present day comedians as our version of the poet & prophet. Comedians, they see what life is really like. And we listen to them, maybe more than our parents or pastors or friends or professors or poets, because they make us laugh when they tell the truth. 

Each of us know that forever-empty. We’re laughing with Louie & Conan, but there’s an ache in our gut. And not from the laughter. But from the truth. For Louie, he felt a powerful sadness & nostalgia from a Bruce Springsteen song. But we all have a song that slays us in that way. It’s so beautiful, and reminds us of a happiness that used to be ours or something we hope to be ours. I call it an ache for heaven, an ache for God. In his ache and longing, Louie reaches for his phone. But God longs for us to perhaps reach out for him and find him – because he is not far from any one of us. 

I can’t really speak to the power of evangelism techniques or prayer regimes, but I can speak about the power of beauty I experience in God’s good world. From a song to a poem, to sunlight on my skin, to the freshness of a breeze, to the shape and color of the mountains at the end of the day – when they look like cut-out paper. It’s these things that make me sigh from deep down, and those sighs become my prayers. It’s those moments that are my holy communion, the temples where I meet God. 

Sometimes those moments happen at Christian events (and we pray that they do), but it is in the daily and the ordinary that God is reaching out, even though he is not very far from any one of us. 

Question – What moments have brought out the longing in you? In reflecting on it, how might have God been reaching out to you, in ways you may have missed at first? 

Prayer – God, I’ve been told that you are everywhere and somehow very, very close to me at the same time. I’ve been told you’re right here, right now. That you breathe life into everyone and all of creation. Would you let me feel and know your nearness? It is hard to stretch out my hand because – what if you’re not there? I doubt, but I am told that you love me and that you never doubt. So when I reach, will you let me find you here? 

Silence – End your time with two minutes of quiet.

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Christian Sexuality: follow up to the previous devotional

This post includes: my beliefs, my advice, and my personal experience. No devotional content, but my hope is that you still benefit from it!

Belief: The work of a good observer is to be open a myriad of interpretations, even if their gut instinct is a single interpretation.

I am someone who always has a gut-instinct interpretation. This isn’t bad. But I am growing in holding my interpretations loosely as I listen to others or personally consider other interpretations.

Why is this important? Because our observations turn into interpretations. Our interpretations turn into gut-beliefs. And our gut-beliefs always form our actions.

Advice: So, being slow to interpret is very wise. For example: The next time you’re hurt by someone, try erasing your gut-belief (e.g. they are someone who hurts me) and interpretation (e.g. they don’t care about me) and go way back to the initial observation (e.g. they’ve canceled plans on me three times in a row). Have a conversation with them about your observation and be vulnerable with about how you interpreted it and how it made you feel on the inside. Then, open-heartedly ask for their interpretation and feelings. Hopefully, in this process, you will both find your gut-belief being changed to something like “this person makes mistakes, but still cares about me”

Personal Experience: I made an observation: The devotional on depression, 65 notes. The devotional on sexuality and shame, 0 notes

My gut-interpretation* trying to be open: It makes me wonder if college-aged Christians are generally unashamed of mental illness and depression and their emotional selves, but are very ashamed of their sexuality.

I don’t know if this is true, but if it is, I hope we can grow in being unashamed of our sexuality. 

Can Christians even be unashamed of their sexuality if they’re unmarried** --- or even more extreme, can unmarried Christians embrace their sexuality? If these questions scare us, we might begin with wondering why. And if we cannot answer these questions, it may be time to start asking.

Sam thoughts. Sam Musings. SaMusings. 

Always My Best,

Sam

*Note: Other interpretation, “this devotional is not as good as the first one”. In my effort to be open, I believe there are more possibilities than my first two gut-instinct interpretations. I just do not know what they are.

**Note: I wrote these questions based off my interpretations and experiences. In my experience, the conversation about Christian sexuality has always included the word “marriage”. To be clear, I don’t personally believe it has to.

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How Can I Be Made Whole Again After Having Sex?

The Question – How can I be made whole again after having sex? How do I tell my future partner?

Morning Pages – Take 3 to 10 minutes to free write or type whatever’s on your mind, just to clear some space or to ponder the question

Silence – Take two minutes to sit in silence, create a timer on your phone if you find it challenging to be still at first. Let yourself open up to God and remember he is already with you.

Scripture – Very early in the morning Jesus went into the temple courts where all the people gathered around him. He sat down among them to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before everyone watching and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” (They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.) But Jesus bent down and started to write in the dust with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” Again he stooped down and wrote in the dust. At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” “No one, Lord,” she said. “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus said. “Go now and leave your life of sin.” John 8:1-11

Reflection – In sinful sexual acts or in lust (cultivated sexual thoughts), when you’ve been “caught” by a roommate, a friend, or most often, your own conscious… Let me ask you, what do you expect from Jesus? If you were this woman, dragged out in the middle of the street for all to see, do you expect a harsh word & the back of his hand? 

We anticipate the punishment, the shame, the humiliation of who we are. Something about our sexuality, especially our need for it, seems like the quickest thing to plummet the way we see ourselves. Counselor Chip Dodd speaks to this saying that, “the need of sexuality is our need to feel and experience comfort and confidence in our own skin, not the need of sexual acts. Sexuality fulfillment is the feeling of being glad to be in our skin” 

The feeling of being glad to be me. Are you happy to be you? Even though you’re broken and messy and so tired? Or do you feel ashamed for being you? Of not being good enough, pure enough, whole enough? It makes sense. We’re broken. We were broken from the start. None of us have ever been pure. But the good news is that we’re all moving from sexual brokenness to sexual wholeness. All of us are being made whole by our intimacy with Jesus, the one who loves you for being you. 

Caught in the middle of the messiest moment of her life, Jesus shocked everyone and offered the adulterous woman a loving reach and a tender response. Each of us need what this woman got: an honest encounter with the real Jesus. We need the Jesus who offers His hand, a gentle response, and his grace that always offers us a new way. A new way to be, and a new way of seeing ourselves: whole because he is Whole. 

Question – Where do you most need to experience Jesus’ gentle reach and tender response? Where do you most need to be reminded that it is good to be you?

Prayer – Jesus, we thank you so much. Our hearts are glad that you make us whole. Where we expect to be teased, mocked, judged, or outcasted, Jesus, you take our hand. You say to us, “You’re with me now and there is nothing to be afraid of” Even at our very worst, you call us friend. We ask that you give us the courage to expose the vulnerable and the ashamed parts of us to you. Let us receive your love in the most tender, vulnerable places of our hearts. In Your Name, Amen.

Silence – End your time with two minutes of quiet.

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What Role Does God Play In Depression?

The Question – What role can God play in depression? How can I help a friend struggling with depression other than responding with the really dangerous "just pray harder and have better faith and God will heal you"

Morning Pages – Take 3 to 10 minutes to free write or type whatever’s on your mind, just to clear some space or to ponder the question

Silence – Take two minutes to sit in silence, create a timer on your phone if you find it challenging to be still at first. Let yourself open up to God and remember he is already with you. 

Scripture – “Some men came carrying a paralyzed man on a sleeping mat. They tried to take him inside to Jesus, but they couldn’t reach him because of the crowd. So they went up to the roof and took off some tiles. Then they lowered the sick man on his mat down into the crowd, right in front of Jesus. Seeing their faith, Jesus said to the man, “Young man, your sins are forgiven.” Luke 5:18-23 

Reflection – “Seeing their faith, Jesus said to the (sick) man…” It may be an unpopular opinion, but my thoughts on the subject: I feel as though depression is the church’s modern day leprosy. The reactions aren’t as intense as they were in first century Judea, but we do fear it, we avoid it, we catch eyes with the sick and immediately look away. Parker Palmer, an author, shares his experience with his multiple depressions: 

“Unfortunately, many friends and acquaintances didn’t know how to be present to me. They were scared of me, I believe—they didn’t want to come anywhere near me, as if I had a contagious disease. Or, they offered me well-intended but inadvertently hurtful advice that allowed them to leave their version of a “gift” in my hands—and then get out of the room as quickly as possible. Of course, in this situation, that doesn’t feel like a gift at all, but a rejection, or even a kind of curse. So when people say to me, “I have this friend or relative who’s depressed—what should I do?” I usually respond, “Well, I can’t prescribe in detail, but I can tell you this: do everything in your power to let them know that you’re not afraid of them. Be present to them in a way that expresses faith and confidence that they have what it takes to make it through.” Source 

The depressed need allies they can rely upon. Friends who won’t shy away from the wounds. Friends who will pick up the corners of their mat and carry them to the feet of Jesus. When we see Jesus interact with the sick, he always draws near. And when we see Jesus draw near, we see the compassion, power, and tenderness of God. 

Question – How have you avoided the sick or hurting in your life? What scares you from drawing near towards sickness or pain?

Prayer – Jesus, thank you for being so truly gentle. You’re so willing to come near our sicknesses and you’re so unafraid, even when we are. When all seems lost, and life feels crowded, I want to remember the rooftop. That with God, there is always a way in faith. Jesus, we don’t want to give up, we want to be right in front of you. Thank you Jesus, that you’re the ultimate friend who holds our mat and carries us straight to God. In Your Name, Amen.

Silence – End your time with two minutes of quiet.

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This little note sits to the left of my steering wheel. It’s been there for about a year. I forget its there by now. With time, its degraded from a note to a shape. Just another knick knack in my car...

Every once in a while, my eyes wander at a stoplight and it turns from shape to note again and the words surprise me every time. 

I felt ill and troubled this week. I haven’t had capacity to write a devotional just yet, even though I am very much wanting to.

Yesterday, my sickness caught me by surprise and right when I wondered to myself, “will I ever be well?” I was caught: turns that pollution into wholeness and hope.

Who? Who turns pollution into wholeness and hope. And how? Who is he? He is Jesus and it is by the power of his very own love.

To those who have submitted devotional requests through your questions, thank you. I look forward to writing next week. Until then, I pray you are blessed by these words like I was.

My Very Best,

Sam

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A guide through a curated devotional...

I want to share the basic rhythm for these devotionals. This is a rhythm I’ve found particularly helpful for me to open up to God in my mornings or evenings. Sometimes I do all of it, sometimes I’m stuck on one sentence. It really doesn’t matter how you or I move through it. What matters is we stay attentive to what God is doing inside us. 

Morning Pages – Ah, morning pages. One of the most helpful times of my daily life. What are morning pages? Morning pages are the words I write every day before time with God. They’re completely stream of consciousness. And even though it can sometimes be beautiful, it isn’t meant to be poetry or prayer or prose. It’s a brain drain. It’s a chance to get some of the noise and clutter out of my head. To clear some space for me and for God to be together. Try it. If it blesses you, let it. If it’s not working for you, feel free to move on. I probably spend about 10 minutes typing. Others prefer handwriting. Some even draw. The point is preparing room for you and God. 

Silence – Try just two minutes. Two true minutes of sitting comfortably and quietly. Focusing on your breathing. Maybe you pray a simple prayer like “Jesus” or “Father”. Silence has been the primary place of my transformation this last year. I will encourage others in this direction for the rest of my days. 

Scripture – Less is more. Another lesson God is weaving in me. But here is your time to gently read the words. To note which words or phrases your heart responds to. This is often our friend Jesus warming your heart. His tone is never harsh. His words at times may sting, but they always soothe. (Hebrews 4:12 & Psalm 147:2). Allow God’s word to read you. Remember, slow and steady, being attentive to what God is doing inside you. 

Devotional Reading – These are either my reflective thoughts or wise words of different saints through the ages, or maybe even a combination of the two. Like Scripture, they are meant to be read slowly and prayerfully. As you engage the words, remember to share with God what you’re experiencing. If comfort, thank him. If confusion, ask for help. If wonder, you can say wow :) Famous writer Anne Lamott says her three most important prayers are always either thank you, help me, or wow. It may seem childish, but it is good to be childlike with God :) 

Question – Jesus, our master question asker. In Scripture, he answers 3 questions and he asks over 300! The question may challenge you or poke at your heart, but remember you’re engaging with the Kindest One when you pray. You may find it helpful to write a prayer response or to return to the question again later in the day. 

Prayer – I may end it with a written prayer on your behalf. It will be intended for you to pray, but you can know that I prayed it first for you :) Change the words to suit you, let the words help you where you need help, or letting them be an inspiration for your own prayers. Again, use them only if it helps you commune with our good God. 

Silence – I advise ending your time with two more minutes of silence. To rest and be still and just sit in God’s presence, knowing He is there.

Thank you for reading and joining me on this journey :) Yes, of these devotionals, but ultimately on the journey of life with God. I pray this place becomes a surprising space where you meet God in simple, but meaningful ways. May you be blessed!

My Best,

Sam :)

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Curated Devotional: What, How, & Why

What is a curated devotional? A “curated devotional” is essentially a handcrafted devotional written by me, Sam :) Curate means to gather, organize, and present. Devotionals are usually simple messages meant to bring people closer to God. So, I’ll gather, organize, and present a unique, simple message with the hope it will bring the reader closer to God. Unique because it’s curated and tailored to the reader’s specific question! This page will be kind of like a living devotional.

How does this work? It’s simple. Go to the ask page, and ask a question. Any question that’s been rolling around on the inside. I’ll create a devotional tailored to the question or its themes or implications. You can ask anonymously, and your devotional will show up on this page. 

Why the curated devotional? It’s simple too. My heart is to shepherd people by providing content (*always scripture, along with other resources) that would usher them into the presence of God. My hope is for individuals who are seeking Jesus, that they would actually find him. And in finding him, they would be surprised to see themselves slowly transformed by love.

Some values: Simplicity, Openness, and Presence. Simplicity and its friends: slowness, stillness, and silence. Openness is soon to follow with honesty, expectation, and willingness. And then Presence will surely come bringing with it warmth, acceptance, and love. I’m sharing this just so know more about me :) and what I hope shapes me and my life and my words. Which is most relevant here.

Some expectations: This is a small project that started out as a little idea in my head. I’ll likely make mistakes along the way, I don’t know if it will grow or shrink, so I want to let you know here that I’m starting small and will publish 1 - 3 devotionals a week. Oh, and I’ll decide which questions for the week this way: I’ll pray through the questions I receive and listen to the Spirit and go from there :) Oh oh, and I want you to know that I am very excited about this and I feel hopeful.

My Very Best,

Sam :)