Personal Library

A 22 year old English Literature graduate collecting, getting lost in and rambling about books. Feel free to ask questions and recommend anything. Currently Reading: George R R Martin - A Game of Thrones + Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Craynor - It Devours + Alex Bertie - Trans Mission

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Alex Bertie ( @therealalexbertie​​ ) - Trans Mission: My Quest To A Beard

If what you are looking for is a relatable, insightful and honest insight into life as a transgender man, Alex Bertie’s Trans Mission is exactly the place to start. All too often when looking at trans media in the past I have found they’re not made with a trans audience in mind. Instead there is a painful tendency for cisgendered creators to sensationalise or alienate the transgender stories they are telling. Not once did Trans Mission give me that feeling, instead it is Alex’s truth: a raw truth not at all dissimilar to countless men around the world. 

Though that does not mean you have to be trans to gain something from this book. In telling his story of growing up, coming out and navigating the NHS as trans, Alex’s primary goal it to educate. While there are sections on safe binding practices and coping with dysphoria to help young trans gender people, Trans Mission is also capable of teaching friends and relatives about those who identify as trans--be this through the importance of using the correct names and pronouns, why certain experiences could make trans people feel a certain way, or even just to understand the hardships facing trans people in day to day life. 

A brilliant addition to this educational nature of the book is the chapter towards the end written by Alex’s mother. While it is beyond important to respect a trans person in their identity, I believe this insight into multiple perspectives takes Trans Mission to a whole new level. In reading this chapter a young trans person may be able to better understand their own parents’ reactions to their coming out, likewise a parent reading this would also have someone to relate to, both of which could be immensely beneficial to a family navigating these experiences together. 

What I found most enjoyable about this read, however, was how truly relatable Alex’s writing became the deeper I went into the book. One chapter in particular stood out to me: the chapter on haircuts. While reading this I couldn’t help but be transported back even a few months to an experience of my own: myself out as trans for the first time and with a group of other ftm trans friends, all discussing the fact that ever trans guy has a haircut story. With that in mind it was no wonder Alex included a chapter like that in his book. Although a haircut can be such a simple thing, for many, it can be an incredible first step in a person’s transition, and it is this which cemented the connection and sense of community I felt with this book. It very well may be this reliability which brings the most benefit to young people reading Trans Mission as it proves anyone experiencing these same feelings aren’t alone. 

I truly believe Trans Mission is a brilliant place to start for anyone hoping to learn more about life as a transgender person, but it is just that: a start. While Alex’s story is deeply insightful and honest, his is just one of countless stories which have mostly, until this point, gone untold. Every trans person’s experience differs, but the more books like this appearing out there the better we will all be for it. But, for now, I can’t recommend this enough.

Rating: ★★★★★

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Book Haul

Juno Dawson - The Gender Games

Juno Dawson - This Book Is Gay

Alex Bertie - Trans Mission: My Quest To a Beard

Ash Hardell - The ABC’s of LGBT+

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Carrie Hope Fletcher ( @carriehopefletcher​ ) - All That She Can See

When I found out Carrie was writing another novel I was beyond excited. On The Other Side had been one of my favourite books of 2016 so of course I had to go along to the signing near me for All That She Can See as well. While it took me longer to read this book there was certainly something which instantly made me fall in love with the characters and the concept for the story. 

Although still inherently told in Carrie’s voice, Cherry came across as much more her own character, someone unique and quirky while not without her faults. Because of that, while reading All That She Can See I didn’t feel as much as though I was reading a book about Carrie herself. She also came across as much more rounded and relatable. This came across most with Cherry’s sense of anxiety at certain points in the novel, a feeling which came across so perfectly I felt as though it could have been taken from my own life. 

While I also fell in love with the character Chase, when it came to their relationship I can’t deny I thought there was something lacking. For the first half of a novel their testing yet largely friendly rivalry drew me in and brought with it endless intrigue of how their relationship would develop. Only, the development never came. In just a single moment rivalry turned to romance and for the rest of the novel I couldn’t shake the unnatural and rushed feeling which came with it. 

However I also feel as though this is a problem which comes with the nature of the story itself. The later half of the novel relies on intense love and caring, but how do you put across feelings like that for characters who only just met? Likewise the friendship between Cherry and Peter felt equally forced, inserted into the story simply for convenience without truly making me care for them. In a way, that made me enjoy the second half of the novel less than I would have had Cherry experienced it alone. 

Now, while I enjoyed the overarching story, having instantly latched onto the concept of personified emotions and feeling compassion for Cherry’s goals, the whole plot surrounding the guild felt confusing and unexpected. Countless times I heard All That She Can See described as women’s fiction, however I would not at all call this description accurate. Though the story retains an element of romance, I thought it would have fit much more at home as a piece of magic realism. It is because of this confusion of genres that lacking areas of the story came to be. How were the guild aware of Cherry’s actions? How did the guild achieve their experiments? What became of the guild following Cherry’s escape? All of this fell unresolved, brushed aside for a lacklustre ending of runaway and romance. 

It is also important to note the treatment of negative emotions towards the end of the novel. Carrie presents an acknowledgement of the ruling emotions have over people and their actions, however her means of describing this when it comes to negative feelings feels largely problematic at times. Intentional or not, while reading certain scenes there came a striking similarity to the common disregard for the severity of depression, anxiety and other such feelings in favour of simply positive thinking. 

It pains me to have to find so many weaknesses of this book as I truly loved the story, the characters and Carrie’s writing overall. Had more time been spent fleshing out her world, allowing for further development between characters, I believe All That She Can See would have resulted in a much more rounded final product. Though, as such is the downside when it comes to publishing two novels only a year apart. While a promising story All That She Can See suffered simply from a lack of depth and development I would dare to bet emerged as a result of tight deadlines.

Rating: ★★★★✩

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New Book

Joseph Fink and Jeffrey Cranor - Welcome to Night Vale: It Devours

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Louise Pentland - Wilde Like Me

I wanted to like this book. I went into this book with high hopes. After such a long reading slump I found myself truly in need of something lighthearted and fun, exactly what this book was sold to me as. We follow a year in the life of Robin Wilde, a single mother learning to balance her life as a parent with her work and relationships. I’m not usually one to be drawn to chick lit, but having a familiarity with Louise’s funny life stories on youtube I decided to give this a chance. I was pleasantly surprised to find I quite enjoyed the novel overall, something which cannot be said for a lot of quote ‘youtube book’, but that does not mean Wilde Like Me came without its own set of shortcomings. 

While I liked the characters, finding them very real and down to earth, one of my main criticisms for this book would be the inability to detach Robin from Louise. While many writers out there stick to writing what they know, Louise wanders too far across that line. Although Robin’s friends strike me as characters, individual pieces of this fictional world, there wasn’t a moment while reading this that I didn’t feel as though Robin’s narrative was truly Louise’s. 

Likewise, there were moments in which I found myself increasingly frustrated with Robin’s character and the overall plot structure of the novel. In life we all have our ups and downs but in the final 100 pages of the book I truly felt as thought Louise did a disservice to her characters. Not 20 pages after breaking free from an unhealthy relationship and deciding Theo has no place in her life, Robin harshly backtracks to needlessly giving him a second chance and this was something I felt entirely unsuitable to her development as a strong woman up until that point. Though Louise tries to present the idea that a woman doesn’t need a man in order to live a happy and fulfilled life, this scene felt painfully contradictory and unnecessary, having removed Robin’s autonomy and sense of self-worth.

I felt a similar sense of frustration with Kath’s cancer, having gotten the impression it was added in during the final 50 pages simply as a last minute thought which never truly came to fruition. While a significant moment in building Robin and Kath’s mother-daughter-like relationship, the one moment throughout the book which truly brought a tear to my eye, I believe it would have been far more fitting to introduce this into the plot sooner to act as a point of conflict for the final act instead of the renewed conflict with Theo. Having experienced cancer scares with friends and family in the past, I simply feel Louise did a poor job of creating the same sense of worry through her writing as would be felt in the real world. 

Finally, one criticism I feel shouldn’t not go unmentioned is the striking errors and poor editing found throughout the book. Time and time again I found myself rereading sentences which didn’t make sense due to missing words or an awkward word order. Perhaps the book was rushed through to publication so some mistakes went unchecked; while I don’t doubt the work Louise put into Wilde Like Me, it would have made for a far nicer read had the writing been fine-combed of these mistakes. 

While I have a number of criticisms for the novel, I truly did find it enjoyable to read. Although not the most challenging read, Louise’s writing came naturally and I felt as though the characters and the language used were things I could easily face in my day to day life, much in the same way many of Robin’s experiences as the same as those we all feel throughout our lives. Though this would never ordinarily have been my first choice of book, I still praise Wilde Like Me for being entertaining, uplifting and at times even relatable despite the stark contrast between Robin and myself. 

Rating: ★★★✩✩

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New Book

Carrie Hope Fletcher - All That She Can See

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New Book

Cory Doctorow & Jen Wang - In Real Life

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Kathryn Wesley - The 10th Kingdom

Ever since I was a child I adored the story of The 10th Kingdom. Magic and the real world combined, it plucked up familiar fairy tales and gave them its own unique twist. To me growing up this truly felt as though it was a fairy tale written for the twenty-first century. Though to adulthood I continued to love the series as much as ever, but it was only this year I came to read my family’s old dogeared copy of the novelisation and now I’m not sure I’m able to put into words quite how disappointed I was. 

What seems most apparent to me while reading the book is simply the fact these are not Wesley’s characters. While she may have written their inner monologues and interactions not taken directly from the series, at every turn there seems to be something her writing lacks: an unquestionable and complete grasp on the complexity of the characters, most notably with our main heroin, Virginia. While in the series she always stood as an independent, powerful young woman, navigating life despite the endless barriers put in her path, the Virginia found in Wesley’s writing appears much more passive, centred around stereotypes unfitting to her character. Ultimately her triumphs are not due to her personal development and determination, they are simply because the writing dictates they must, leaving the message that a woman needn’t wait to be rescued by a prince to fall flat. 

Likewise, Wesley’s interpretation of Virginia’s mother, Christine, feels disappointing at best and highly concerning at worst. Throughout the story we’re told she was ‘sick,’ took ‘tranquillisers’ and ‘slept with other men,’ painting the picture of a cruel and heartless picture of the Evil Queen, unfit to be a mother and evil as a result. The complexity of her character feels lost. Christine, a woman dealing with mental illness as a result of an unhappy marriage and an unwanted--seemingly forced--pregnancy, is villainised simply for her unwillingness to conform to the expectations of women in her time. It isn’t her choices and actions that make her evil in the eyes of the characters but rather her failure as a mother and I feel this is an incredibly unjust representation for real women finding themselves in the same situation. 

Then comes the matter of time. Some stories age well but this novel has not. Where the series makes endless references to icons of its time which remain in common popular knowledge almost 20 years later, but many of these are replaced in the novel in favour of more obscure references which cause confusion for someone who was only a young child in the 90s. Momentary though they may be the impact of this is strong enough and frequent enough that I felt myself thrown out of the story each time it happened. 

Similarly was the language used throughout the novel. So many dated phrases Wesley uses come across as unnatural and repetitive, a feeling I can only liken to someone middle aged trying to write how they think a teenager would speak. It saddens me to admit this wasn’t the only issue I take the very writing itself as well. The 9 Kingdoms were intended to be lands of old, magic and fairytales, but all too often continuity was broken when reference to things which had no place in the setting were made, creating a medieval/modern hybrid which felt jarring to read unlike the original series. And finally there were countless grammar mistakes throughout the novel which made even the simplest of sentences sound strange and unnatural. 

While I love the story and the characters of The 10th Kingdom, I have to admit reading this brought me into the biggest reading slump I’ve had for a long time, lasting four months until I finally forced myself through the second half. I cannot recommend the original mini series for this enough, but when it comes to this novelisation I can say for certain it won’t be a book I likely pick up again. 

Rating: ★✩✩✩✩

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New Book

Louise Pentland - Wilde Like Me

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Veronica Roth - Carve the Mark

I wanted to like this book. I so dearly wanted to like this book, but when it came down to actually reading it I found myself disappointed time and time again. In the end I felt there was endless potential lost in what could have been a thrilling story of a political struggle through space. Instead I found bland characters, an uninteresting plot and a tendency to describe clothing rather than build on the world Veronica Roth has created. 

One of my most significant complaints while reading Carve the Mark comes from its uncertainty in regards to genre. Roth’s writing seems to fail like so many of the sci-fi fantasy genre in that, by trying to be both sci-fi and fantasy, it succeeds at being neither. Moments which could have strengthened the novels stance as sci-fi are brushed off by Akos’ lack of knowledge and Cyra’s disinterest. Meanwhile elements of fantasy, such as the magical and mysterious currentstream, simply didn’t feel believable to me. These elements of fantasy are equally brushed off by the characters as simple and mundane, leaving readers to believe in their fantastical nature simply because the narrator says so. 

And then came my dislike for each of the characters. Whether boring or annoying, the further I read the more I found myself overwhelmingly disliking each of Roth’s characters in turn and finding their actions and speech unbelievable and forced. Not only that, but it is because of this I found each shocking turn of the plot fell short, predictable at best and caused endless amounts of impact to be lost. 

The same can be said for the elements of romance between Akos and Cyra. Their relationship feels like one built simply on convenience and proximity. There is no build up of trust, friendship, or familiarity, it simply occurs to bring in an added element of romance--one in which I truly believe would have aided the story had the subplot been cut from the story entirely. A relationship needn’t be romantic to be significant to the characters, or even the plot. 

Shortly after starting to read Carve the Mark, I was surprised to hear of the level of controversy surrounding it, however it did not take long for me to see how sadly true so many of the claims made about Roth’s work are. Living in what so often seems to be a time of racial unrest and inequality, I feel as though Roth’s treatment of the Shotet race to be overwhelmingly disappointing. At just a glance Ryzek holds a striking resemblance to that of the trope of the dark skinned aggressor. Violent, oppressive and evil--Ryzek acts as an embodiment for the whole of the Shotet race, who too are so often described as barbarian in nature in contrast to the gentle and kind, white skinned people of Thuvhe. I am not the first to draw comparisons between the appearances and traditions of the Shotet people and their real world counterparts in North Africa, but in light of this Carve the Mark has an undeniable grounding in racist stereotypes, whether Roth intended this or not. 

While reading I also took issue with Roth’s treatment of chronic pain through the character Cyra. In Roth’s acknowledgements she notes women who experience chronic pain as the inspiration behind Cyra and her currentgift--a dark shadow on her skin eternally wracking her body with pain--though throughout the novel I found Roth’s treatment of this issue to be insensitive, harmful and profusely ableist. Not only does Roth describe Cyra’s chronic pain as a “gift”, one to which is supposedly self-inflicted and brought on by an inner desire to cause herself pain, but it is also the crux of Cyra’s relationship with Akos. Possessing a currentgift which allows him to bring a temporary end to Cyra’s pain so long as they make physical contact, Akos’ role feels as though it suggests a girl need only a man to love her and to save her for all of her pain to go away--an idea which dismisses the reality of chronic pain for so many, while also holding a painfully sexist message for young readers. 

Having enjoyed Veronica Roth’s previous works, I went into Carve the Mark with high hopes, though now it feels almost foolish to have done so. Between latent racism and ableism, bland characters and a failure at world-building, now after finally forcing my way through to the end, I simply wish to step away from this book and move onto something more promising. At this time it is unlikely I will pick up future instalments to this series. 

Rating: ★✩✩✩✩

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Bioware/Dark Horse - Dragon Age: The World of Thedas Volume 1

Since discovering the Dragon Age games a few years back I have fallen in love with the series and it now stands as one of my favourite fictional worlds, and one thing that has always stood out to me most is the extensive and detailed lore used to create such a rich and believable world. And so, I was thrilled when I was finally able to get my hands on this book. Whenever I read or play anything related to Dragon Age I find myself transported to Thedas and I have to say The World of Thedas did not disappoint in that regard. 

With no prior knowledge about The World of Thedas before picking it up, what I was expecting was a detailed account of character and world building from the writers’ perspective, or something of that like, however what I found instead was a nonfiction account of a fictional world. This account tells the history of the nations, races and religions within Thedas, and so much more. With this history told from the perspective of Thedosian scholars and natives, I found that far more effective in catching my attention and making me truly care about the miracles and tragedies of Thedas’ past. 

Now I am not usually one to buy art books. I enjoy looking at beautiful concept art as much as the next person, though never before has it been something I’ve been compelled to buy. That being said, the artwork through out The World of Thedas added far more to my experience than I could ever have anticipated. It was one thing to read a description on the page, but something entirely different to see it drawn out as something tangible and beautiful on the following page. Not only did this what previously unexplored corners of Thedas looked like, but it created an atmosphere comparable to that felt while exploring Ferelden, Orlais and the Free Marches within the games. 

Undoubtedly, what I came to love most about this book was its way of creating a complete picture. All too often in the Dragon Age games a story is told in small pieces picked up from across the land (sometimes even across games) and brought together by the player. However The World of Thedas does a magnificent job of telling a story--such as that of the prophet Andraste, or the emergence of the Blight--in its completion, almost as though written to preserve these stories through the history of Thedas. 

That is not to say I did not take issue with any aspects of the book. One particular problem I encountered was the regular lack of added detail on many subjects. As someone who has played all of the Dragon Age games multiple times and read up on much of the lore previously, I often felt that The World of Thedas did not go beyond the bounds of knowledge already explored in Dragon Age: Origins and Dragon Age 2. Likewise, the games tendency to provide the player with choices which effect the overall state of their world across the series meant this book left certain elements unresolved and because of this I found myself craving concrete ‘correct’ choices, such as under what circumstances did the fifth blight come to an end, and how was the mage uprising in Kirkwall helped or hindered by the actions of the Champion of Kirkwall? 

Nonetheless, despite small complaints to be had about neglected details, I hope this is an issue which will find resolution in The World of Thedas Volume 2 due to its greater focus on the characters encounter throughout the series, rather than the continent of Thedas itself. Overall this book was simply able to intensify my love for the series by further solidifying the world of Dragon Age in my mind. I cannot recommend this book enough for anyone who has played Dragon Age games, or even those who are interested in looking into the series, because nowhere else is there such as thorough and complete account of Thedas. 

Rating: ★★★★★

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January Book Haul

J K Rowling - Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find them Screenplay

Peadar O’Guilin - The Call

Veronica Roth - Carve the Mark

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Hello!! I just found your blog. I actually just started a book review blog :) I wrote my first review and am working on some others soon. I came across your page and I just love it. Your reviews are so good. I now have so many books I need to read! :)

Awww, thank you! I’m so glad you enjoy my reviews. And I hope you enjoy reading those books as much as I did! :) 

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Benjamin Alire Sáenz - Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe is a book I’ve wanted to read for some time now, however whenever I’ve gone to buy it I’ve found it just isn’t stocked in most UK bookstores, but I finally got hold of it at Christmas. I wasn’t entirely sure what to expect going into Sáenz’s work, other than an LGBT romance and perhaps a touch of philosophy, but I say for certain I didn’t not expected it to become the fast favourite it did. I started reading it at 7am during a long car right and by the time I went to bed that night I was finished. I simply could not put it down  

There are countless reasons I fell in love with this book, but what stood out most to me was just how real both Ari and Dante felt. Both embody a complexity of character that takes them beyond simple stereotypes Ari is angry and scared. Dante is patient and pushy. Both have depth to their character I often find so lacking in YA fiction. Ari is not angry for the sake of it, he is angry with the struggles in his life, but he’s learning: learning about others’ struggles and how to cope with his own. Dante is kind, caring and patient, but even he has his limits, just like any real person, and this adds to his unfaltering determination. Both Ari and Dante are growing throughout the story, discovering and coming to terms with their identity and existence; it is these raw and real feelings I find most intriguing and relatable about their characters. 

Then there is the matter of their shared cultural identity. Most often I find that stories about LGBT teenagers discovering their identities and falling in love are becoming increasingly acceptable in YA fiction, but only when the story told is that of a white, cis-male, middle class relationship or character. However, this is not Sáenz’s story and for that I applaud Aristotle and Dante. This is the story of two Mexican boys on the edges of their culture, both inside and outside the norms they associate with their heritage, and this is something I find most significant about Sáenz’s story. Aristotle and Dante depicts the social and cultural multiplicity of modern times, demonstrating how children in recent decades have been required to navigate complex and multicultural identities which were never as prevalent for past generations as they are today. 

Now, I have to take a moment to mention the style of the novel. I’ve heard countless people criticise Sáenz’s work because of the essential lack of plot throughout the novel, however, this is something which brought me greater enjoyment as a reader. Aristotle and Dante spans over a year, collected in snippets of live narrated by Ari, moments both insignificant and meaningful. There moments are what set the pacing for the story and it is because of this that the story does not require a single overarching plot. The plot of the story is merely Ari’s life and the events which unfold following his meeting with Dante. 

As much as I truly loved this story, I do have one major criticism for Aristotle and Dante, and this is the overwhelming number of mistakes I found within the writing itself while reading. All too frequently sentences were missing words and at times I found words placed in the wrong order. Though at times I found Sáenz’s work to be beautiful and philosophically inspiring, I feel like scenes of less significance could have been helped greatly with greater focus during editing to prevent the shear number of grammatical errors in the final copy. 

That being said, Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe made me love reading in a way a book has not been able for quite some time. It made me fall in love with the story and the characters from the first page and it will not be a story I forget any time soon. For now I am cannot wait to read the much anticipated sequel to this story, There Will Be Other Summers.  

Rating: ★★★★★

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J K Rowling - The Harry Potter Series

I’ll the the first to admit, my love for this series is more than a little bias due to childhood nostalgia for these books. I can’t remember a time I didn’t know about the Harry Potter series and these were some of the first books that ever actively made me want to read. As you can see in the picture, they have been well loved. Now in 2015 I started a very slow reread of the series, for the first time in about 8 years, when we studied The Philosopher’s Stone as part of my children’s literature module at university. Now a year and half on I finally finished this reread and can say I still love these books as much as I did as a child. 

Although some of the language feels dated at times, Rowling’s world is still as familiar and welcoming as ever. The series has stood the test of time in a way not all books are able. As someone who grew with this story, the world still feels real and plausible, in spite of and because of its magic. Maybe this is because of the writing, maybe this is because I’ve seen the story when visiting real world locations it depicts. Either way, nothing has been lost with time. 

Similarly, this being the first time I’ve read the story as an adult, I feel like coming back to the series now has allowed me to look at the story and the characters from a different angle. No longer is there quite the struggle of good and bad, but rather shades of grey and the greater good Deathly Hallows so often emphasises. Sacrifice, adventure and life, all of these come together to create a sense of multiplicity not quite possible for a child reader to grasp. 

On top of this, whilst reading the series from a critical literary perspective I found the books not only to be traditionally didactic as children’s literature so often is, but at the same time holding features which may be likened to feminist and queer theories, as well as cultural and historical elements. An example of this would be a comparison to be made between the treatment of Hermione’s physicality and identity with that of a transgender child. Though identities such as this are not typical for children’s literature, I found being able to read the characters freely in this way adds a further level of depth and enjoyment as it means any child reading these books now can see these aspects of themselves reflected in strong and likeable characters. 

One criticism I had for the series, however, was the occasional failings of continuity within the narrative. At times I found myself annoyed when Harry, or other characters, would overlook simple matters already established within Rowling’s world or the story, even more so when these matters were given focus in the last 50 pages. 

However, in spite of minor annoyances to be found in the writing the Harry Potter series remains some of my favourite books to date. Few books have been able to draw me into a story and make me care for characters quite like Rowling has and it is because of this I feel confident in saying this will be a world I continue to get enjoyment from in years to come. 

Rating: ★★★★★

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I would basically be interested in knowing if you liked the story/what worked for you/what didn't/if everything makes sense, etc., as a reader

If that’s the kind of thing you’d be looking for then I’d be quite happy to read it, though I’d likely still be quite slow with it ‘cause April-ish time is looking to be quite a busy time for me. 

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I'm writing a book and it'll be finished in April and would it be weird if I asked you to be my beta/tester?

I’m always happy to read new things, though I have to admit I can be quite slow with my reading and I’ve never been a beta for anything before. I’m currently writing my first novel too and I’m still in the learning stages of writing a book myself, so it would depend on the kind of thing your looking for in a beta?