I think pretty much my entire life I've spent running away from things. One horrible thing happened right after another and it became too much for me to deal with so I disassociated from reality. I'm here flying above reality, rolling with it's punches, knowing that it exists. Allowing it to exist freely and without interruption because I know I can only mar it. I watch the world spin round as I stagnate in song. Down the rabbit hole again to escape. And when the moment arrives, I've never been happier to hear the sweet, unbridled, ghostly melody or fall down that godforsaken rabbit hole even though it takes me away from -- end
Lucid days, here at last? Quite unwelcome. Unsettling one's soul only to see the encompassing maelstrom of terror. Why must fragments of reality reveal themselves in such a grisly manner?
What debt do I owe the universe that will stop the annihilation of my essence? I will gladly pay it.
