𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙎𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙃𝙄𝙂𝙃𝙎

DAKOTA JOHNSON River’s mom. Taylor’s wife co-founder of teatime pictures RP. Not Real

[limelightoconnor]

I miss you! Feels like I didn't get to say a proper goodbye to you guys and the island. As is the curse of being one of the busiest people in the world, apparently. @dakotajchnson

[dakotajchnson]

I know! One minute we were all on that island together and the next everyone vanished into the night like some summer camp ending. And don't blame being busy, mister. You're just annoyingly employable. I miss you too, though. I miss Stromboli, I miss our little routines, and I miss getting to work with you, Jessie and Sersh every day. It all went by way too fast. I've seen you killing it on your press tour for Disclosure Day. Do you ever take days off?

[dxstinrxnnels]

@dakotajchnson

I was told that we'd be watching a movie of yours and I thought I was about to be watching 50 Shades of Grey and I am so greatful it wasn't. Hi I'm Dustin nice to meet you.

[dakotajchnson]

Dude, the relief in that sentence is a little offensive. I'm kidding. I respect the honesty. Now I'm curious. What movie did they actually make you watch, and how disappointed were you when there were significantly fewer handcuffs involved?

[huddywillams]

𝟐𝟔. Who are some people you'd like to work with someday?

@dakotajchnson is the only right answer here. we need our horror movie.

[dakotajchnson]

Well, now you can't back out. The internet saw it.

[hayleyfm]

#10 - If you could trade places with anyone, who would it be?

@tcylorkitsch because he gets to be married to @dakotajchnson don’t think I’m worthy of being married to such a badass, good looking lady but hey.

[dakotajchnson]

We can ditch Taylor and Brandon, and we'll run away together.

[huddywillams]

for fucking real. rachel is amazing in everything she does. i don't think there's a single film that stars her that wasn't an instant hit. playing it safe is boring as fuck so i agree. love the films that cause mixed reactions, both good and bad. you know i disagree with all of that, but as long as you're okay with it. how's filming going?

[dakotajchnson]

Exactly. Give me a movie that swings for the fences every single time. I'd rather watch something that completely commits to a weird idea and divides people than something technically perfect that nobody remembers a week later. And thank you for supporting my self-appointed role as the least cool person in my cast. We actually wrapped! It was one of my favorite experiences I've had in a long time. What about you, though? Are you finally getting a chance to breathe after wrapping your movie, or did you immediately throw yourself into the next thing like the workaholic you are?

[tcylorkitsch]

Taylor: I take it from your text tone the gig is up, is it? This life can't compare to the one you found I get it. You go live out your fantasy being a fish wife. Im definitely jealous of a filming location right now. But you know we can go back? You and I?

Taylor: Look, I’m not saying our daughter is running a syndicate, but there ever comes a day the FBI knocks on our door, I may be turning her in immediately. I’m too pretty for prison, Dakota.

Taylor: To answer your very serious and completely valid questions, you might want to brace yourself before you check your closet, she wanted to play dress up a bit. I can replace anything in there is the good news. Let’s just say River has a very avant-garde vision for your heels. And she terrifies me when I say no.

Taylor: I think she honestly came out of the womb with a blueprint for all this and that attitude. I am not blaming you but I am saying you are the one with less rules so. But on another note this empty house will soon a little less lonely and that is a nice thought. River and I can't wait till you get back.

[dakotajchnson]

DAKOTA: The gig is absolutely up. I'm literally on my way home as we speak, so your reign of terror as a single parent is almost over. Try not to teach her any more crimes in the next few hours. I fully intend on dragging you back to Stromboli at some point. DAKOTA: Also, I'm sorry... my heels? Taylor Kitsch, what exactly do you mean by "avant-garde vision?" Because those words don't belong in the same sentence as my closet. I feel like you're trying to soften the blow before I walk into a crime scene. DAKOTA: And don't think I missed the fact that your first instinct if the FBI arrives is to turn in our daughter. That's actually terrible parenting. You're supposed to go down with the ship. DAKOTA: Although, in fairness, if she gave me that face she does when she's being mischievous, I'd probably cave immediately too. Which is why I refuse to accept any allegations that I'm the bad influence. She came out like this. We're both victims. Honestly, the thought of seeing you both in a few hours is making me ridiculously happy. I miss my little criminal. I miss my husband. I miss our bed. I miss all the boring little things that didn't seem important until I was halfway across the world. So please tell River that mommy is on her way home, and tell her she has exactly one hour to destroy whatever remains of my closet before I arrive and begin my investigation.

[bvngchcns]

i do! the fans have seen them already. they've posted about them and it definitely made me laugh a bit. they did. i'm sure they are on youtube. bet if you looked up my name and commercial in some way, you'd find them. i feel that honestly. i mean it does honestly, haha. that's cool though and i can imagine how that felt being around them when you were a child. 13? that's a lot but felines always seem to great to be around. i can't even blame you for doing that. i wouldn't either. it's like too many interesting things happen in your life so it's never easy to pick just one to share that won't have people questioning you on.

[dakotajchnson]

Well, now you've given me a mission. I'm absolutely going down a YouTube rabbit hole looking for baby Bang Chan commercials later. If I find them, I'm not responsible for how much I tease you about them afterwards. I'm kidding, kinda. And honestly, growing up around lions and tigers was one of those things that felt completely normal at the time. Then I'd mention it as an adult and people would stare at me like I'd grown a second head. Which, in hindsight, is probably the correct reaction.But that's exactly the problem with fun facts. You're supposed to have one quirky little story and instead you're sitting there trying to decide which absurd chapter of your life is the least alarming to a stranger. Although I have to ask now... what's the weirdest fun fact you never tell people? Because I refuse to believe the commercial thing is the strangest one you've got.

[andrewgarfied]

Poor bloke, he really had no idea what he'd signed up for. Neither of you could've predicted just how massive and weird it was all going to become. I can absolutely see how exhausting that must've become after a while. But I like that you can look back on it fondly now, because it really was a once-in-a-lifetime thing you went through together, and there's something weirdly special about surviving that level sort of thing side by side. Well, you'll be first to know but even if you didn't approve, I fear I'd still end up dating the woman anyway. I'll take your opinion into consideration! It matters, just not that much.

[dakotajchnson]

I think that's the perfect way to put it, actually. Neither of us had any idea what we were signing up for. We thought we were making a movie and then suddenly it became this giant cultural phenomenon that somehow refused to go away.But you're right, there is something weirdly special about having gone through it together. Nobody else really understands it the same way because nobody else was in the middle of it. Why am I even here if you're going to ignore my recommendations? At the very least I expect veto power over anyone who gives me bad vibes. That's just common sense. But tell me, what have you actually been up to lately? I feel like we've spent all this time talking about women and Jamie Dornan and not nearly enough time talking about you.

[tswiftfms]

it's okay, i won't tell anyone. i just am physically incapable of not loving on you with all i have. not sorry. it was the worst. i tried so hard to see everyone. please, let's do it. we really do deserve it. some where hot, with good food and good drinks, please.

[dakotajchnson]

A girls trip is officially happening. I think we've earned it. After Napa I left wanting about three more days of hanging out with everyone. It felt like every conversation got cut off right when it was getting good. And now that I'm done filming and my life is finally calming down a little, I feel like I can actually enjoy things again instead of sprinting from one commitment to the next. What have you been up to?

[gothmgs]

which just means we have to take advantage as often as possible while we're both working! after all, it's good to balance all the working hours with some fun, wouldn't you say? that's wonderful, and just look at that cast! you know i'll be over the moon to see three incestuous sisters when it comes out. you say that, though i just see talent working with talent since i could sing about yours for days on end. though i sort of know what you mean since i regularly pinch myself for getting to work with justine triet, who is just a dream director. perfect! we can hang out on the beach here, and i'll visit you there in italy after. what do you think of us doing a restaurant crawl since italy does food so well? plus can't think of anything better than the best food and company at once. filming isn't going too badly! i'm out of the first few weeks of filming jitters, so i feel like i can finally enjoy myself a little.

[dakotajchnson]

See, this is why I hate the universe sometimes. We were finally in neighboring countries for once and now I've already wrapped filming before we properly got to take advantage of it. And don't even get me started on the restaurant crawl because that sounds exactly like the kind of thing we should've been doing. Just wandering around eating pasta, drinking wine, and judging desserts. I would've been so good at that. Also, look at you casually dropping Justine Triet into conversation. I completely understand the pinching yourself thing. There are definitely moments where you look around and think, 'How did I get here?' and then you remember this somehow became your actual job. It's ridiculous. But I'm glad you're past the first few weeks of jitters. That's always the hardest part, isn't it? Once you settle in and stop overthinking every little thing, you can finally start having fun. And you deserve to enjoy it. Also, for the record, I fully intend to cash in on that beach offer at some point. I'm not letting this friendship continue without significantly more wine, sunshine, and Mia in my life.

[dakotajchnson]

We're officially done filming, and it still doesn't feel real. Every time I say it out loud, I half expect someone to tell me we have another week left. This whole experience was so special to me, and I don't even think I've fully processed it yet. And what made it even better was getting to do it alongside one of my best friends. Yes, that's a little cheesy, but I don't care. It's true. It was kind of crazy, wasn't it? One minute we were talking about how excited we were to start, and now suddenly it's over and we're left wondering where all that time went.

[arjonaadria]

How is my sweet angel? Hey, would you let her ride Fifi with me one of these days? Fifi is my tractor, by the way. I got her after Napa on a whim, and I'm obsessed. You can have a ride too, if you play your cards right.

[dakotajchnson]

the fact that you bought a tractor on a whim after Napa is one of the most Adria Arjona things I've ever heard. Of course you did. And of course her name is Fifi. River would lose her mind. She already thinks anything with wheels is the greatest invention in human history, so a tractor? You'd instantly become her favorite person and I'd never hear the end of it. So yes, under very close supervision, I would absolutely let her ride Fifi with you.

[michaelbakari]

did you watch "swapped" with your kid yet? i can't remember how old she is, but i think it's a great family watch. that's what my sister and her kids say at least. if you haven't watched it yet, i'll start seriously doubting my skills as a voice actor and you'll never hear the end of it. so lie to me if you must. [ @dakotajchnson ]

[dakotajchnson]

I've been a terrible mom lately. I was in Italy filming a movie for the last month, so I haven't actually gotten to do nearly as many movie nights with River as I normally would. She's almost two now. Please don't take it as a reflection of your voice acting abilities. I promise it's more a reflection of me being on an island in the Mediterranean pretending to be a professional actress. But as soon as I'm home, that's the first movie we'll watch. Was it your first time doing voice acting?

[limelightlowden]

That's no my fault, pal. I was only hiding behind the vines every time ye walked near. But aye, definitely getting sick of ye. Yer husband, on the other hand... never getting sick of his face.

[dakotajchnson]

So that's how it is? Sick of my face but Taylor gets a free pass. I'll be sure to let Sersh know exactly where your loyalties lie. And before I forget, happy birthday, pal. I hope you've had the best day, been thoroughly spoiled, and received at least a fraction of the love you put out into the world. You're one of the good ones. Look at me being gross.

[tcylorkitsch]

Taylor: It honestly feels like you just started filming yesterday, but also not at the complete same time. I’ve missed you like crazy. Stromboli looks absolutely gorgeous on film, but it definitely sounds like time to bring you home.

Taylor: You have a standing appointment for the bed soon as you walk in the door. Maximum coziness, zero alarms, and all the cuddles you could want. Soak up the final days on set andI can't wait to have you back.

[dakotajchnson]

DAKOTA: See, this is exactly the problem. Part of me feels like I just got here, and the other part feels like I’ve lived on this island for six years and developed a completely different personality. I’m going to miss it. But I’m also very ready to stop living out of a suitcase and return to civilization. Or at least my version of civilization, which is mostly you stealing my side of the bed and River using me as a jungle gym. And thank you for the standing appointment. That sounds perfect, actually. Ten hours minimum. Maybe twelve. I think I've earned it. DAKOTA: Although I do have one concern. Have you been letting our daughter form a tiny criminal organization while I’ve been gone? Because every FaceTime call lately feels like she’s learned a new way to cause trouble. How many laws has she broken? How many things from my closet have been sacrificed in the process? And most importantly, which one of you is the bad influence?

[dakotajchnson]

DAKOTA: Babe, one more week and I'm done filming. It's crazy how quickly time passes. I'm going to miss Stromboli but at the same time, I can't wait to go back home and sleep in my own bed, with you. After I'm done I'm going to need a 10 hour nap, with you cuddling me, of course. / @tcylorkitsch

[arjonaadria]

I definitely need four more days of wine tasting and lounging without thinking of call times or spending hours in a hmu chair. I know it's back to "real life" now, but ugh. It wasn't enough!

[dakotajchnson]

Listen, I really wasn’t ready to say goodbye to Napa yet. A few more days of wine tasting, no schedules, and pretending real life didn’t exist would’ve suited me just fine. But at the same time, I was dying to get back to my baby girl. Facetiming her every day wasn’t enough. The second I got home and she wrapped herself around me, I was like, okay… this is the part I missed the most.