datethetown

[datethetown]

And finally, folks met, friends made

Almost a month after the fact, and two weeks since having returned from Mexico, I suppose it’s time to spill the beans on how I managed to find my people on my solo trip (sans the regular method of hostel parties). And of course it happened in the most natural of ways - aka with no one trying. I power-walked to make an 11am English language tour of the Oaxaca Botanical Gardens (Jardín Etnobotánico de Oaxaca). She was right in front of me, asking “una persona mas?” to which the security guard gravely shook his head no. It was fully booked, I overheard him tell her, but that there was a Spanish language tour she could join in 15 minutes. Realizing that I, too, was resigned to the Spanish tour, I worried that though my Spanish is good enough, could I understand botanical taxonomy? The look in her eyes made me think she was undertaking the exact same calculations. Nonetheless, we both said yes, one ticket for the Spanish tour please! And then...as we went through the insane Covid rigamarole of Mexico - mandatory hand gel upon entry everywhere and being sprayed with who knows what to allegedly disinfect your air and aura, we shared an eyeroll. The eye contact that would write the history of the rest of my trip in Mexico. 

Quickly realizing we were maybe the only English-speakers on the tour, we immediately bonded. “What did the guide say?” “Oh okay she said something about potatoes,” “Can you take a photo of me standing in front of this huge cactus?” And since few things breed intimacy as quickly as being the odd women out, the conversation turned to the usual travel Q’s - where are you from? Oh how long are you here? What’s been your favorite part so far? What was your last relationship, how long did it last, and how long has it been? God why are men so annoying sometimes? And then finally, after an hour long tour - “What’s your name?” “Julia.” “Pinar.” Nice to meet you! 

(One of many photos taken of me by Julia)

(Having formed such a quick bond, we naturally went to the bathroom together)

Julia was visiting from Berlin and had been traveling through Mexico with her friend Ellie. She invited me to join the two of them for lunch later at the Mercado Organic La Cochesa. I had other plans so I said no - JUST KIDDING - of course I accepted the invite. And as they say, the rest is history. Julia had some errands to run, but Ellie, equally as open and generous as Julia, invited me to join her for a walk around town. 

(A mural made of mole) 

Throughout the course of the day, I came to find out that Turkey was a commonality between all three of us. Ellie had lived in Istanbul for 6 years, and had actually met Julia there. It never ceases to amaze me how small this world is. We walked around and came upon a beautiful wedding celebration - traditional Oaxacan version with monos de calenda (huge paper mache dolls in the shape of the bride and groom). It was so joyous and I am as speechless now trying to find words for how truly sweet of a moment it was to watch as I was then. 

We talked and talked and the afternoon turned to dusk which turned to night and it felt like a reunion of old friends, as it does sometimes. Our time in Oaxaca overlapped a few more days and we partook in many more adventures in the Oaxaca Valley (most memorable of which was Hierve el Agua) - more on those trips coming soon!

So - my rating of just talking to the person next to you when the natural opportunity presents itself - A+++!

[datethetown]

A Cooking Class in Oaxaca and Still Solo

Only a few days into my time in Oaxaca, I was ready for some more social activity. Thankfully I had planned ahead - about a week prior to arriving in town, I booked my first Airbnb experience - this time a traditional Oaxacan cooking class. I’m glad I did, because these classes SELL OUT. This class seemed right up my alley - delicious food, unlimited mezcal, Oaxacan countryside, and fellow cooking/travel enthusiasts. Following my mezcal y mole tasting class logic, who doesn’t like the people around them more when food and alcohol are involved? Surely this would be a winner for meeting some folks in Oaxaca. Spoiler alert - I did not meet any folks.

(Host Sylvia - photo from the Airbnb class page)

The class was marketed as a “Traditional Oaxacan Cooking Class” on Airbnb and had a slightly higher price point than other cooking classes on the site. I’ve never taken any other classes on Airbnb so I can’t compare, but the experience felt well worth it. The main chef Sylvia’s son Baldo picks everyone up in a van near the historic center of Oaxaca, from where the whole group takes about an hour trip to the Etla valley countryside. Take a look below at where we had the class...I mean...

The class was rather small and intimate at 10 people. As soon as we arrived, Sylvia, Baldo, and her “sous chefs” (several Etla residents who helped oversee all the cooking in our group) gave us mezcal, agua fresca, and PLENTY of snacks. We’re talkin’ tostadas, chapulines, gusanos de maguey - oh sorry, you don't know what all these are? Let me elaborate:

(Tostada)

(gusano de maguey - aka agave worm)

(chapulines aka grasshoppers - photo from the Airbnb class page)

After we stuffed ourselves with bichos (bugs), we were onto the cooking! 

(Of course no cooking could be completed without a cute grandma apron)

We made several traditional Oaxacan dishes, including Tetelas (kind of like a quesadilla in the shape of a triangle), Memelas (a smaller, thicker, squatter tortilla that is totally proud of its shape and owning it), and the star of the class - mole verde (green mole). 

(cooking the tetelas we made - we pressed our own tortilla from fresh masa)

Sonia explained to us every ingredient in mole verde as she added it to the metate (kind of like a mortar and pestle). I only took photos, not notes, so alas I cannot give you the recipe.

We all took turns grinding it into a paste and, seriously, I’m pretty sure my turn lasted a lot longer than everyone else’s...I had muscles in my forearms that were sore for the next two days. But here’s the end result before being added to a broth with pork ribs boilin’ away on the stove. 

Pretty crazy how small the paste is after seeing all the ingredients that went into it, no? This legit took maybe 30 minutes at least to get to this point and serious elbow grease. Rumor has it (as in Baldo told us) Mexicans use a cheat to get their moles prepped nowadays - a food processor. 

We then made salsa from scratch - I made the chipotle salsa in a molcajete (another type of Mexican mortar and pestle).

And then....we ate! I’m very proud of the tetela I made and why yes that IS me adding chapulines by choice to my memelas. And don’t @ me but I forgot to take a photo of the final mole verde dish but trust it was good and it was consumed.

Overall, this class was such a special experience, truly. You already know the ending - no, I personally didn’t meet people I got to hang out with more in Oaxaca, but everyone was chill and equally as grateful to be partaking in this experience. Almost everyone in the class was off to new destinations the next day, so who knows, if timing had been better, maybe there would have been more casual bonds formed. It felt like a pleasant impromptu dinner party where everyone is simply content to be there with bellies full of delicious fresh food and mezcal, and skin warm from the sun. The class was an amazing introduction into an Oaxacan family and meal and for that alone it gets an A++++ from me. Baldo and Sonia really make you feel like you’re at home. If you ever find yourself in Oaxaca - do it. 

More information about the Airbnb experience here:

https://www.airbnb.com/experiences/546012

And soon I’ll tell you how third time’s a charm and that I ultimately did meet cool folks who I got to share many Oaxaca experiences with.

[datethetown]

Solo en Oaxaca & An Adventure in Mezcal y Mole Pairing

I’ve been sauntering and strolling through Oaxaca for the past week. Already in Mexico for 10 days prior (exploring bustling Mexico City, aka CDMX), I landed in Oaxaca and immediately felt the absence of my friends in CDMX. With an Airbnb booked for 2 weeks, I panicked - was this going to be a lonesome trip as opposed to the refreshing reset I had hoped for?

Truth be told, the first two days it was a little lonely. Though my Airbnb was clean and comfortable, it was in a Spanish-style hacienda which meant almost no sunlight filtering through. And in the interest of eco-friendliness, all the lights were harsh fluorescent - not an inviting place to read a book with a nightcap. 

Thus began my frantic attempts to pay for friends - aka sign up for a bunch of classes and tours. And as luck would have it, I made friends the old-fashioned way - free. But wait ‘til I get there.

The first class I took was literally the least conducive to meeting people - but that was all due to timing and luck-of-the-draw. I took my first Airbnb experience - a mezcal and mole pairing class. Much like the Wine Bootcamp classes I was taking in NYC, this was a pairing of yet another alcoholic beverage with a complementary food (I’m noticing a trend here in what I like to do...). The experience and pairing was originally created by Daniel, a sommelier, though my experience was led by Marcelo. Marcelo was an absolute pleasure and had such knowledge about mezcal. He spent the ENTIRE session telling me about the various mezcals and moles, and about the agave plants associated with each mezcal as well. Why ENTIRE, you ask? Because I was the only person there. So alas, as wonderful as the class was, it was not a date the town opportunity. I’m sure under different circumstances and popular class times my impression would have been different. I mean who doesn’t get chattier and friendlier after a few shots of mezcal? I can only imagine the missed opportunity. 

That being said, Marcelo was extremely kind and friendly, and we bonded over shared personal histories in Turkey (my family is Turkish and he spent a year abroad in Ankara). He gave me a few local recommendations for food in Oaxaca (Empenadas del Carmen - I’m coming for you soon).

As you can see from the photo - there were 7 moles we tried. Did you even know there are 7 types of mole?? I’ve always been a fan of mole negro, but I also found myself drawn to mole coloradito and almendrado - they have a very similar deep umami flavor to them. My least favorite was the amarillo, which Marcelo said is a very popular mole flavor to hate. I hear the mole amarillo served at empanadas del carmen is delicious though, so I’m going to keep an open mind.

Thanks to Marcelo for providing me an amazing intro into the diversity of mezcals and moles in Oaxaca, and for some company for a few hours on my first Oaxacan day! You can find out more info about the Airbnb Experience here:

Mezcal and Mole

What was my next attempt at finding friends through bribery? I’ll tell you next time.

[datethetown]

Wine Boot Camp @ Compagnie  des  Vins Surnaturels

I’m dipping my toes into a new wine tasting series I’ve started taking at Compagnie des Vins Surnaturales, in the heart of SoHo. So far it’s been a fun little teaser of the wine world. The first class I went to was about wines from the ancient Carthage regions. I was solo, and when I first arrived I was surrounded by friend groups and couples, sending me into a very minor panic at whether or not this was an appropriate activity to go to solo and was I about to feel incredibly uncomfortable as everyone around me chitchatted about the wines with their wine buddies. Fret not, I snapped the fuck out of that unreasonable thought train real fast and settled in. But now having gone to two classes, it is a good balance of both solo vinophiles and couples/groups. 

The instructor, Vitalii Dascaliuc, is an absolute hoot and joy. He’s a total wine and history nerd, and his passion for these two subjects is out on full display in these classes. With each sip of wine you get an exclusive pass to his inner giddy child nerding out over whatever wine we’re all drinking. That enthusiasm breaks down the traditional stuffiness of wine tasting, and his nuanced descriptions of the wine is an excellent. I haven’t taken any wine classes before, but one of my favorite parts of this class is that Vitalii goes into a bit of the regional history behind the grapes and wine production in whatever region the class is exploring that session. There’s also a small (read one-bite) dish served to accompany the wines and see how the wines pair with the appropriate food.

I’ve still got a ways to go with my wine knowledge, but I give this a B- rating for meeting new people. It’s truly fun, but this is a very activity-focused class. You taste the wine, it’s about an hour, and then you’re done. The onus is on you to chat with Vitalii and the other students there. The session goes by very quickly and it’s a one-and-done unless you sign up for multiple classes (which at $55+tax a pop, adds up real fast). The potential to befriend people who are also interested in wine is there over a longer term, but from a date the town POV, the class vibe is a one and done get some people energy around you before going back to life. 

The wallpaper is pretty nifty.

Schedule and class info can be found at: https://www.compagnienyc.com/wine-bootcamp

[datethetown]

Why I’m Dating the Town

I KNOW, we’re all sick of the virtual book clubs and Zooms, but somehow a lot of them are sticking around. I don’t know about you, but I sure as hell did my fair share of these hellish virtual happy hours, and I am ready to get back out there. Vaxxed, masked (If necessary, I really don’t want to anymore and trust me I will if it’s needed), and tasked with the sole purpose of expanding my social horizons. 

We’ve all talked about the impact the pandemic had on socialization for truly everyone. What started off as transitioning from real-life to virtual socialization for most, slowly turned to us cautiously dipping our toes back into seeing folks in real life again. Some of us have built a new community by helping the community via various volunteering activities and mutual aid groups. Others have entered and ended new relationships, romantic and platonic alike. Most of our pre-pandemic relationships changed drastically. Priorities shifted, friendships ended due to politics or the politics of Covid protocol, or honestly, maybe we just saw the same people too much and we still love them very much but need to see what else is out there. It’s not them, it’s me... 

Speaking of me...I experienced all of the above during the pandemic and at this point, I’m sporting some chic covid blinders. I’m not sure if it’s covid fatigue or an unhealthy coping mechanism, but I am lucky to have returned to a fully normal life where I no longer need to say “socially distanced, of course” when I meet people in the real world. (Thank god, btw). But...who do I meet with after all the social upheaval of pandemic politics? 

So that brings me to today. Follow me as I try every meetup group so you don’t have to. Just kidding, there are some meetups I will never go to nor should I. But I will be trying out new things in the city just to see what’s friendliest. I endeavor to see who else is out there in the most diverse, greatest city in the world. What’s the vibe at this trivia, that salsa club, the other volunteering group. Dare I even try to crash a meeting of the Coney Island Polar Bear Club (possibly the most exclusive club in NYC!)? A lot of what I hope to try will have other foci such as helping build a better community, but it doesn’t hurt if I can chitchat along the way, no? 

Some of my friends will share their findings as well since different strokes for different folks. Follow along...friends!