Saw you wanted so non-ableist terms! Hope this helps a bit.
non-ableist alternatives for insulting people or things!
1. please do not say āl*meā
cruddy
annoying
disappointing
lousy
no good
crummy
rubbish
junky (as pointed out by a comment, not to be confused with j*nkie and better avoided in real life, when it could easily be confused with a slur against addicts)
rotten
cheesy
corny
tacky
2. please do not say ād*mbā or āst*pidā
illogical
foolish
silly
nonsensical
obtuse
sophomoric
ignorant
incomprehensible
irrational
senseless
vapid
3. please do not say ācr*zy,ā āps*cho,ā or āins*neā
ridiculous
unfathomable
erraticĀ
illogical
unbelievable
unreasonable
absurd
wacky
eccentric
out of control
unpredictable
wild
preposterous
ludicrous
outlandish
Okay, a few points to consider about lists like this:
For a great many people who this whole āchange your languageā activism claims to help, this is actually completely inaccessible. Ā Check this post. Ā Basically, telling somebody who actually has an intellectual disability or a cognitive impairment that, no, they have to say āsophomoricā instead of āstupidā is the opposite of helpful, individually or in terms of dismantling systems of oppression.
Thereās a difference between a word like 'stupidā, and a word like 'retardedā. Ā One of these words is explicitly linked to one particular oppressed group, and centuries of systematic violence. Ā Like several other words (and you know what they are, we all know what they are) itās not okay to use. Ā The word 'stupidā, on the other hand, is literally a descriptive word meaning 'not smartā. Ā There is a really big difference here, and equating the two is not helpful to any cause.
Letās say this again: 'stupidā is a descriptive word meaning 'not smartā. Ā ItĀ doesnāt mean the same thing as intellectually disabled. Ā It didnāt originate as a descriptor for the intellectually disabled. Ā (Lame, okay, yesā'lameā specifically means somebody who canāt walk; I generally avoid it myself, because it has that explicit connotation. Ā There are arguments to be made about linguistic shiftāif most people know that 'dumbā means 'stupidā and very few people know that 'dumbā means 'muteā, then the primary meaning of the word hasĀ changedābut thatās way, way beyond the scope of this post.) Ā When youāre writing a list like this, youāre trying to protect people from a part of language that isnāt even aimed at them.
The only real connection that the word 'stupidā has to people who are intellectually disabled, is the idea that intelligence is Good Good Good, and lack of intelligence is Bad Bad Bad. Ā Thatās not a problem of the word 'stupidā, thatās an underlying social and cultural problem. Ā Any word you choose has that underlying social and cultural problem.Ā Ā Replacing 'stupidā with 'irrationalā, which A) has been used to silence women (and many other oppressed groups) forĀ years, and B) means the exact same thing, in terms of Intelligence Is Good and Lack Of Intelligence Is Bad, is, well. Ā "Irrational.ā
"Why are you trying to make tiny changes when there are children starving in Africa!ā is a terrible argument against any kind of activism for a whole lot of reasons, and I donāt want to make it here. Ā I do want to say, however, that if changing your languageāor, specifically, policing other peopleās languageāis your prime form of activism, you should probably rethink your plan. Ā Things like this donāt happen because somebody used the word 'stupidā. Ā They happen because some people have intellectual disabilities, and other peopleĀ think that intellectual disabilities make a person less than human. Ā Saying that itās too horrible to even call something 'stupidā doesnāt really help that problem.
I wouldnāt make a big deal out of this, except that itās sort of amazing to me: whenever I see people blogging about disability/mental health activism via changing our language (which is a powerful tool, donāt get me wrong!), 95% of the time, itās the people whoĀ arenāt disabled. Ā The people whoĀ are disabled, or mentally ill, or who this list otherwise applies to, tend to blog about how this particular kind of activism does them more harm than good.
