Epilepsy Fact #6
People who have absence seizures can travel through time.
This is not a cutesy joke about how being cognitively absent for a short period of time gives the impression of “traveling to the future.” In fact, the truth is quite the opposite: absence seizures are a side effect of time travel.
People who have absence seizures belong to a class of superhumans called Timewalkers. The term is a misnomer because they don’t do any actual walking. Technically, they project their minds unto the astral plane and travel back and forth through time, repairing fissures in the spacetime continuum and making adjustments to history in a never-ending battle with the Eternal Phoenix, an eldritch horror from beyond our reality that seeks to destroy us all by unmaking our past.
According to the ancient codices of the Timewalker Infinite Library, the Eternal Phoenix has succeeded in completely extinguishing humankind just 4 times. However, each instance was thwarted by active Timewalkers who survived the violent shift within the timestream, sparing them the change in history that unmade their brethren–and all of humanity.
Without the guardianship of the Timewalkers, humanity would not exist. Sadly, for their honorable service, the Timewalkers pay a great price. The strain on their brains caused by frequent timewalking results in absence seizures. If you know someone who struggles with absence seizures, know this: it is because they have been working diligently to preserve your existence, and you owe them a great debt.
They accept personal checks.
More epilepsy facts
