bad puns and finger guns

Emma, 20s, avid escapist. I stay up late and stir my tea widdershins.

[financepigdotnet]

(violently jerking the steering wheel) my car swerves like crazy when i do this

[kneworder]

NO ONE IS DOING IT LIKE DEGRASSI

[cowdogpaws]

[literallymechanical]

"Reviewer 2 wants better citations" moodboard

[punished-venom-solitair-e]

im not christian but i do believe in the power of prayer. for this reason i keep a little homonculus in a dog crate under my bed which i have raised as a devout catholic. whenever i want something in my life to change i poke him with a stick and he clasps his grubby little paws together and starts chanting in latin. his prayers always go through because he has never known sin

[evilwizard]

just a heads up. im gonna do a big curse soon

[evilwizard]

okay so honestly i wasn’t expecting they’d be able to hide the body for this long

[evilwizard]

LINDSEY GRAHAM ?

[radicalgraff]

“If you promise to stay alive just a little bit longer I promise that we are going to make this world a place worth living in by any means necessary. I ain’t giving up. I swear.” 

Spotted in Clackamas, Oregon

[anarchopuppy]

I can’t stop thinking about this message, so I spent a while trying to isolate just the writing and make it transparent. I might order a shirt with it

Whoever in Clackamas wrote this message on their bus stop, I love you

[wholesomepostarchive]

10/6/2024

[depsidase]

[website-com]

ive heard if its all gone wrong and is fucked beyond repair you can actually use it for banana bread

[dsudis]

Maybe... can have shit in Detroit?

Historic wild rice restoration underway in the Detroit River: ‘Living tribute to the First Nations'

Historic wild rice restoration begins in Detroit River as tribal partners work to bring back sacred grain that disappeared from ancestral wa

[morrigan-disapproves]

ultimately we all have to quit our jobs and walk into the sea

[00000000000000z-deactivated2022]

happy Mother’s Day to these two queens

[just-deer-things]

what a beautiful time of year everyone is growing veegtables for me spacifically, one problem though you need to make fences shorter im sure its a mistake but i cant reach some of them

[just-deer-things]

hello imptortant message from deer youyr doing it agen. i cant eet the vegbals you are growing for me like this

[xenosagaepisodeone]

hey man i see the projector in your mind's eye casting the image of a beautiful self indulgent fantasy over my silhouette so i just wanted to remind you before you try any funny business that when its battery dies it's just going to be me here

[ozth]

fuckkkkkk I cleared the time loop first try

[ozth]

I woke up in the morning and everything was different

[tragicfaggots-deactivated202407]

person w adhd experiencing symptoms of adhd: why the fuck can’t I do this thing . I wish there was some explanation for this

[geigercuntter]

Instead of going to work tomorrow why don’t we all just dig a really deep hole

[anonymousalchemist]

ykno the thing about poetry is that 99% of it is bullshit and the other 1% will cut you like a material knife, and for every person that 1% is a different section of the whole. this is probably true about all art.