declan rates trees

if you dont want to end up on my blog, dont have a tree. (please have a tree. trees are good. I want to blog about them.) trees: I rate them for your enjoyment (I'm a headmate in the Sol system, main here: @inkedacrylic)

[declan-rates-trees]

Hey there, lovelies~

What is this blog all about?

Trees! And my ratings of such.

Spill. What's your origin story?

'Kay. So, I was out on a walk with my muse Noe one day, making sassy remarks at the trees we passed as one does, and then he said I should make a tumblr. And declan-rates-trees was born! Conceived. Procreated? Uh, anyway...it was a fucking fab idea so I took it to its obvious conclusion.

You swear a lot.

No shit.

And don't get me started on the bawdy jokes...

So theres this cool thing called dont follow. Theres the door if it's not your jam. I get it. I'm not for everyone.

Who are you, anyway?

Reading my bio is free, bitch

Okay...so what kinds of trees do you rate?

All kinds! Any tree I see on my travels. But to keep things organized, my tags this year (2022) will focus on:

Trees in spring 2022

Trees in summer 2022

Trees in fall 2022

Trees in winter 2022

Basically, I rate a tree on how well I think they're representing that given season.

Do you accept submissions?

Girl, yes! And please do.

[declan-rates-trees]

4/10

No flowers...I'm definitely disappointed babe

But! I do like whatever frilly nonsense this is

Cant hate the bright green shade either honey

[declan-rates-trees]

3/10

Girl what in the bald spot

Like

This looks intentional....

Love your white blooms, doll, but did you sass a lawnmower or something? 😬

Let's focus on your good side then I guess.....😅

[declan-rates-trees]

Update 🚨

So...one giant bald spot is how you chose to solve this?

Hon

Just no

1/10

[declan-rates-trees]

5/10

Girl...you ok?

Your blooms are a bit top heavy huh?

Also ...where'd you get that gear? 👀

Asking for a friend

[declan-rates-trees]

4/10

Oh sweet lamb, arent you just a treat!

you're trying so hard, I can tell

Wont lie, a bit sparse but

not bad for a wee babbie twee uwu

you got potential, kiddo! I cant wait to see you grow ♡

[declan-rates-trees]

Update🚨

Cute little leaves, lovely!

Still going to rate the same because you lost most of your petals but.....

I am so proud of you, doll! 💜

[declan-rates-trees]

3/10

Girl what in the bald spot

Like

This looks intentional....

Love your white blooms, doll, but did you sass a lawnmower or something? 😬

Let's focus on your good side then I guess.....😅

[declan-rates-trees]

9/10

Giiirl.......what

What is this..... perfection????

You are beauty

You are grace!!!

This is nearly the total embodiment

Of

Spring!!!!

[declan-rates-trees]

1/10

Oh

My girl

What

This

Is not

Okay

You. Are

Totes

A Tim Burton

Moment

But not Spring vibes.......at all

Gawd

...yikes babe

[declan-rates-trees]

4/10

Lil scrawny...but you're trying sooo hard babe ♡

Better blooms than some of the big girls.......and that's the tea

totally cant wait to see you bloom over the years, chickypoo ^-^

[declan-rates-trees]

4/10

Oh hon

Oh babe

This isn't your fault but why did they do this to you

You have seen some shit huh sweetie? 🥺

...keep keeping your head above water, lovely one

[declan-rates-trees]

1/10

What

the

hell is this.....

....

Baby honey sweetpea no

Halloween is a long way off and there isnt a Hot Topic for miles......

what

Are

You

Doinnnngggg

I will check on you this summer & fall and so help me if you arent doing better ill definitely lose my shit 😡😡😡

[cycles-seasons]

[theconstellarium]

@declan-rates-trees 👀 got any thoughts on this fabulous lady?

[declan-rates-trees]

8/10

Ahh, the elegance~

Gurl you're the kind of babe I'd love to party with the fae under

all sipping chilled red from dragonglass goblets...

& soaking in all that murk and moss and mysterious aura youve got going on there

Your ivy is simply gorg bestie ♡

[declan-rates-trees]

4/10

Honey baby doll what are you doing

Theres so much going on here

I mean

Dark leaves light blooms

you went hard with the witchy goth lolita look though wowie

like do you want to have tea with lace

Or collect halloween candy and nom my face

I just dont know hon

[declan-rates-trees]

6/10

What yes hello

Tops a lil dingy but who among us hasn't had a top like that once in a while right ????

But

Girrrrrl you gotta tell me where you get your blush at

cuz that pink is fab fab fab 💕

[declan-rates-trees]

4/10

Lookin kinda drab there babe. You probably shouldn't have passed on that trim 3 weeks ago...

But damn. your bricks

Gurl. I'm obsessed. What's the story there?

[declan-rates-trees]

8/10

What a fucking glow up

What

Huh

Babe...whoa

You really went to town here

Consider my expectations fucking exceeded hon

💦 whew 💦

[declan-rates-trees]

6/10

Hey cutie

Arent you just trying your best this year

Absolutely head over heels in love with your green hues

Annnnnd I'm resisting the mighty urge to take you out shopping for some skinnies 👀

I mean, those legs are killing it girl!!

Slay!

[maureen2musings]

…

@roksolyana_hilevych

[theconstellarium]

@declan-rates-trees

WHO IS SHE

[declan-rates-trees]

8/10

The mist, the mystery

The miss where have you been all my life

And

Giiirl

And just...That beard tho

Are you...an ent? An ent wife?

I just cant sis

You are near perfection and I'm absolutely here for your whole vibe hon