"Say That... Again."

Were these quotes actually said by the TF2 mercenaries? Maybe, maybe not.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Spy: Your insolence goes too far!

Scout: Wrong! It can go a lot further!

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Engineer: Jumping out of helicopters is dangerous. You know, they say 1 in 5 people don't even make it to the ground.

Scout: What do you mean they don't make it to the ground? Where do they go?

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Scout: Houston, we have a problem.

Sniper: Where are you?

Scout: Houston. That’s the problem. I don’t know how I got here.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

My IQ test results were negative.

-Scout

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Scout: Question: do we have any gun-swords? I watch a lot of anime and trust me, we're gonna need some gun-swords.

Spy: What’s an anime?

Scout: We have much to discuss.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Scout: One day I hope I am the man that walks into a room and all eyes are on him.

Demoman: The trick is to get a really big hat and then scream.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Medic: How do you feel?

Sniper: Thanks for asking, I have no idea.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Scout: I got arrested for being too cool.

Spy: The charges were dropped because there was no supporting evidence.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Medic: What if "It’s Raining Men" and "Let The Bodies Hit The Floor" are about the same event from different perspectives?

Spy: I’m literally begging you to stop.

Engineer: No wait, let him finish.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Scout: Can your "science" explain why it rains?

Engineer: Yes! Yes it can!

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Scout: Can I have these question mark stickers?

Medic: Why?

Scout: I wanna put them on stop signs.

Medic: SCOUT, NO!

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Houston, I have so many problems.

-Sniper

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Medic: Aren’t you supposed to be babysitting Scout?

Engineer: He’s over there, dazzling some psychologists.

Scout: All women are at least 30% attracted to me. My mother cried the day I was born because she knew she could never be better than me. At any given moment I’m thinking about one thing: Richard Dreyfuss hunkered over, eating dog food. I feel like I’m the Paris of people. I’m exquisite. 

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Engineer: Everyone synchronize your watches.

Scout: I don’t know how to do that.

Spy: I don’t wear a watch.

Medic: Time is a construct.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Spy: This is such a bad idea.

Sniper: Then why are you coming along?

Spy: One of us needs to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Scout: I’ve come to offer you friendly advice.

Engineer: I really don’t want your advice.

Scout: Well, then consider it unfriendly advice.

[definitelycorrecttf2quotes]

Scout: Do you ever say anything encouraging?

Medic: I ENCOURAGE you not to die.