poetry

my demons give me poetry

[memoirsofafool]

if lucifer needs someones consent to enter their body then so do you

[demonswearsparkles]

Diamond Earrings for a Poor Girl

This is not the first time a poor poper tells her story of woes; A divergence between two roads. The stradling of opposite worlds gets old. I would cry, but then it would show. Would the makeup rush down my face And show that I am not meant to be? Your credit cards are a novelty And I am swindling for every penny But still pay for brunch And even if I tell the truth I have a hunch, I would not be believed. The girl that wears armani Can’t afford to pay for tea? I’m sorry I tried so hard to fit in; I still don’t feel welcomed in my skin And I lock my doors and close my blinds, Trying to hide. The anxiety is overwhelming And I have no grasp, Each dollar amount is weighing on my back And things are falling apart But I still want to be pretty. Charge the card for my rent And buy me diamond earrings.

[demonswearsparkles]

A Sonnet of Love. Maybe

What is this song of love that wears my face; Why do the birds chirp when I sing his name? In my dreams we are brought back to that place Where we fell in love, his spirit untamed. Is love love if it has never been said; Is a deep human connection enough? Without a nurturer does love grow dead; Overgrown with weeds, are our hearts still tough? When we return one day, will we be changed, Both hurt by life, as too much time has passed? Two years have gone. Does any love remain? I am worried our memory won’t last. From all these questions, there is but one threat For you was there ever love to forget.

[demonswearsparkles]

Father, My Reflection

I have lived and breathed As the image of you, An atrocity of the heavens, A Mendelian curse. The angle of my bones Reveals the tragedy of my birth. Et tu, Brute. I have tarnished my mother's womb; The enemy infiltrated the most sacred space With a spy that wears his face-- A face she is forced to both love and hate. The mirrors in my room are shattered, The reflections haunted For the fragments tell a story of the unwanted. Father who didn’t care; A mother that couldn't bear The burden of raising a shrine to you. I can destroy every mirror in my path; I can tear out my eyes and watch them run black But it wouldn’t be enough. You, apart of me; Me, apart of you, Maybe if I bleed, you’ll bleed too.

[demonswearsparkles]

But we are friends

I walked into the smoke filled space-- Too many kids with an affinity for vape. I scan the room For every girl there are four dudes I guess my subconscious identifies a threat Shrug it off, smoke to forget In the back with best friend He is 6’5 I couldn’t contend If he wanted me he could have me And I don’t know if I could scream His power over me is debilitating Fuck-- My mind is playing tricks Return to the blaring music Too many white guys drinking beer And slurring all the lyrics But they are my friends Nothing bad will happen to me He just wants a friendly kiss His hands did not mean to linger on my hips But the weight of his arms are heavy I can smell the warm beer trying to leave his belly My instincts say fight or flight The door is in my sight But they are my friends I should not feel this way They are the ones in my life that have stayed I think my heart knows That one day if my legs are opened too wide They will try to come in And bury themselves within my skin Like a parasite claiming its host They will blame the alcohol i suppose Even if I cry They will say But we are friends So it's okay

[remanence-of-love]

[demonswearsparkles]

The Mother and The Daughter

Listen here you little beast I know this is not right But you must protect your heart I do not say this out of spite Every flirtation--intoxicated or not Every seduction technique Or sway of your hips Is not a form of art But rather your undoing For those that can look and touch Have left from the start But you recieve in open arms In hopes that your tongue will nourish Those who are lost That is just their fun and games It is no wonder the Virgin Queen Remains the most desired prey - the mother Do you think these tears I shed are my fault? Every feminist bone in my body is saying fuck off I should not have to censor my body to obtain respect But am I condeming myself to death? To walk this earth in a short skirt pleading for someone to stay Giving too much for the promise of love While you are running away Maybe this is an exageration of my fears I chose bad men and that is clear Weak men, sad men I teach them to feel love or desire Either one works It puts me in power but it's also my curse -the daughter

[demonswearsparkles]

My First Time

My first time, I was 16 and he was 19 And while my friends were disapproving; I truly did love him. A quintessential summer romance, His black hair and wild eyes made my heart dance The drugs and alcohol quenched my thirst I felt too happy to be this cursed My first time, Was possibly a mistake However it was my mistake to make And I wear it proudly But you have to admit his eyes were dreaming And his body carved like the gods That kiss… You must understand why i took my clothes off My first time, Was actually planned My boyfriend took me by the hand I really thought he loved me But I guess I was mistaken This innocent passion was already awaken And I gave him everything My first time, was wholly mine, I don’t owe anyone my story It is not something that is taken Or something that is lost It is not a prize And there is not always a cost So any time someone asks about my virginity I spout off one of these stories And they look at me with disgust “I wasn’t asking you to wait until marriage But god you are a slut” I’m not sorry I didn’t wait for someone “special” Each one is special in my heart For each story taught me a lesson My life has been mine from the start

[demonswearsparkles]

What Rests Beneath

What rests beneath this coffin, Maggots and ants? Do you even have room to take your next breath? Is it morbid to say I envision you alive? Dirt under your fingernails trying to pry Pry your way out Because it wasn’t your time There are people that need you to be on this Earth Too heal my wounds to quench my thirst Every mile stone feels like a weight Driving a car, my first real date Is just a reminder you are not here To hold my hair to calm my fears Each tear I pour is a selfish act Is it too much to say I want you back? What rests beneath is just a pile of dirt What rests above has much more worth

[demonswearsparkles]

People Are Not Drugs

You can’t treat people like drugs, One hit, one kiss does not equate to love And I understand this power from above Seems like an answer to your prayers This ecstasy is a replacement for your fears. But you can’t treat people like drugs Without getting addicted, The snowy gates of Hell might claim its next victim And you would fall face forward towards the depraved Can you even hear God calling your name? For drugs are not a substitute for adventure And people are not a substitute for pain, This tract is dangerous and would drive anyone insane. People can not satisfy your needs without scourging your soul What each one takes is out of your control; Do you really think you are above this fight? A heroine addict might think the same, You can change your life but you can’t change the game.

[demonswearsparkles]

Gemini

I am Gemini eyes Too many personalities searching for the light Each claiming apart of my skin My left eye sees in black and white This world is far to dim My lips are painted crimson red But change to baby pink Be careful what is said to me Who knows which one will speak In contrast to the left My right side sees in colors A wash of blues and purples There is so much beauty to be discovered And I plan to dance in this rain I see every form of magic My normal is your insane

[demonswearsparkles]

The Slums of Sleeping Beauty

Sleeping Beauty created her curse Too many sleeping pills in her purse She pricked her finger on the spinning wheel Too hard to find a vein She was too pretty to be this insane

[demonswearsparkles]

Summer Loves Should Stay In Summer

Summer loves are like a drug And I'm addicted to its sting I survive on old memories playing my head Withdrawal can be so mean What happens when I can’t remember your scent? Or the way you press me against your skin Your voice may never allude me To forget would be a sin Summer loves are a lie A facade of the imagination A pitiful belief you will meet again Is the final call of desperation Summer loves are a cure To the poison in your veins In its absence the plague emerges To be deviod is to be insane But most of all summer loves should stay in summer Where the sun emboldens its honey scent The real world can not cultivate its passion Winter will destroy the very thing you promised not to forget

[demonswearsparkles]

The Power in a Dress

Whether you look up to princesses, War generals, Or something more There is one thing Wonder Women can’t ignore The power in a dress Maybe a ballgown or something quite less A suite of armour or a cape Is just a dress if you give or take For as misogynistic as princesses go Cinderella creates quite a show From rags to a ballgown Can create the confidence to achieve that crown Girls are raised to be insecure “That top is too low you look like a whore” But when girls put on that floating dress Or faithful jeans Or comfy sweats No man can take away your inner queen Throw on your armour you will be seen And you will soon realize that the dress was just one of the means To truly see yourself as unique

[demonswearsparkles]

Psychology, The Death of Me

The worst part is I have to beg for help

Maybe if she felt my tears, I would be asked;

“How can I make it better?”

Rather than;

“What do you think is so wrong with you?”

Maybe if she heard the voices that plague my thoughts

Or saw me with the knife placed deliberately on my wrist

Or heard the white noise that fills every crevice of my mind.

Maybe if she saw me burst into tears on the school’s bathroom floor

Or attempt to tear out my heart at 3 am

The hardest part is supposed to be asking for help

But yet I’ve encountered a roadblock after that step

So maybe if she saw these scraps of poems

She would admit

Help would possibly be for the best.

[demonswearsparkles]

The Year 2017

A year full of dreams And nightmares all the same Twas a time of wine and experimentation And kisses full of passion rather than obligation An anniversary of mourning rather than glees A newfound confidence taking over me I took control of my body Though the users had no apologies For my body was a form of currency And I needed the money

[demonswearsparkles]

go to hell

When I say I want to die That's just a blatant lie I really just want to live so brightly I might burst into flames That is the Hell I speak of