demo

Willow | she/her

[toskarinfr]

it's important to have bits that aren't good and also nobody likes and also aren't funny

[iphigeniacomplex]

taylor swift is a tyrant for real like value neutral judgement but you can tell in her music the specific point that caligula started visiting her in dreams

[iphigeniacomplex]

she has this 3d-printed mini desk recreation of the bust of caligula with whom she communicates daily and in order to evade football’s suspicions she told him it was jesus and he was like Niiice jesus is actually awesomesauce ❤️ Like jesus helps you with touchdowns🏈🔥 and she was like yess exactly and then asked caligula in perfect latin if he could connect her with the ghost of genghis khan so they can talk strategy

[frickomode]

they sell items at tjmaxx that even God is not aware of

[caudachroma]

cow triangles

[demopronouncedlikedaymoh]

shoutout to that one time i was in tkmaxx around christmas and there was a "gifts we love!" shelf that was just pasta

[awritersbro]

me: *Closes three tabs of Wikipedia and nine of Mirriam-Webster* i can finally finish writing that tumblr post

[demopronouncedlikedaymoh]

how it feels to trick someone into causing misfortune to themselves, for no reason:

[demopronouncedlikedaymoh]

it's kind of amazing how Penis Month on a given piece of writing strikes whenever i have something else really important i should be doing, but hey that's the business. hand me my chisel i got a urethra to carve

[fangshazzard]

I bet raising your arm and summoning a weapon for you to grasp feels good as fuck

[d1s4strous]

eighteen inch nails: i want to fuck you like two animals

[demopronouncedlikedaymoh]

"Improvised Explosive Device" as terminology is capitalist as fuck if you think about it. like wow if a bomb maker owns their own means of production and doesn't have their surplus value stolen by the bourgeois we imply that their product is shoddy and unprofessionally made? fuck you! my pipe bomb i mean the pipe bomb that i allegedly constructed and set off in that sainsbury's bakery - which was a tragedy and my sympathies are with the victims, but, being entirely honest, they got what was coming to them for raising the prices again - was a work of artisanship that the puny minds of the billionaires with their puppet strings controlling our judicial system could not possibly comprehend. members of the jury, i chose to represent myself because i KNOW that lawyers cannot be trusted to act in proletarian interests. can you?

(the jury will pronounce me guilty and the king will permit the judge to enact the "getting silly with it" clause of the Murder (Abolition of Death Penalty) Act 1965 and sentence me to death by poena cullei. i knew this would happen long before crafting my (beautiful) bombs. this is the Golden Path. this is what must be done to avert krazilec)

[chaosmagetwin]

reblog to tell prev she deserves to exist

[chaosmagetwin]

reblog to tell prev she deserves to exist

[chaosmagetwin]

reblog to tell prev she deserves to exist

[stazher]

reminder: all the notes you leave under my posts will be used in the construction of a fearsome and imposing ziggurat

[currentlycryingaboutlancelot]

christopher nolan great gatsby where jay sits down by the pool before he’s shot and says “our roaring twenties are collapsing”

[penny-anna]

imagine you're a mechanic in the Transformers universe and you have a car come in with engine trouble so you open it up and the engine is just full of some kind of weird fast-spreading rust. never seen anything like it before

so you're like. hmmm. and you call the Autobots like 'hi I know this number is supposed to be for reporting possible Decepticon activity but I've got some kind of alien bullshit going on and I don't know who to ask'. they hand you over to Ratchet and Rachet is like 'hm I think I know what that is but let me come run some tests'

SO Ratchet comes over and has a look at the engine and is like yeah as I thought. its crotch rust. and you're like 'crotch rust??' and he's like yeah its crotch rust. its a. well I think humans call them STIs? its like that.

so you're like '..........are you telling me a Transformer fucked this car' and he's like yeah. looks that way. and you're like 'what in the world' and he's like I don't know. people are freaks. anyway we don't want this stuff spreading so I'll be back tomorrow with the right nanites. keep it away from the other cars.

he comes back the next day like okay so I have good news and I have bad news. you're like 'well what's the good news' and he's like WELL I spent last night testing all the autobots for crotch rust and they're all clean. so you're like 'does that mean the car wasn't fucked' and he's like oh no the car was definitely fucked there's no other way this could have happened.

so you're like 'wait. are you saying a Decepticon fucked this car?' and he's like yes. we have a Decepticon fucking cars. and they are giving the cars STIs. thank you for bringing this to our attention here are the nanites goodbye.

[digitrev]

Tag from @prokopetz

[stazher]

google search eating tutorial

google search eating walkthrough

yahoo search eating tips and tricks

yandex search как есть

edge search how to uninstall edge

[stazher]

I'm not getting a good grade in homeostasis

[jelloapocalypse]

Someone asked me a while ago if I still had a photo of the worst sink I had ever seen while apartment hunting in Los Angeles. I assumed I deleted it so I didn't answer the ask and now it's gone, but as it turns out, yes, I do still have a photo of it.