wineslinger-denie

I joined for the Winchesters, stayed for the smut. Grown-ass woman obsessed with SPN, The 100, Idris Elba and Outlander. Former-BAMF!, Wineslinger, Kesha-lovin, feminist, TFW!trash.

[deniewinkle]

Yaaaasssss!!! #rockhorrorpictureshow #interactive #movienight #sohyped #virgin #notme #timewarp #theresalight #drfrankenfurter #brad #janet #rocky (at Creative Alliance)

[yumearashi]

Parents of Reddit Confess Why They Regret Having Kids

"I felt nothing for the child, it was like an object to me."

This is so important, stories like this need to be told.  The cultural insistence we have that parenthood is some kind of magical bonding that happens every time without exception does real harm to both parents and children, as you can see from some of these stories:

My father recently told me he never wanted kids, but my mother wanted them. She thought he would love us when we were born.

and

I didn’t realize that a maternal instinct is not universal. You know how you see parents in the delivery room and they are crying tears of joy? I felt nothing. […] My boys are well cared for and I am always here for them, but it feels very unnatural and fake and unenjoyable. It is a bit like a retail job you don’t like where you put on a fake persona and slog through it the best you can. I don’t get to leave this job, though. 

and

I also thought I wouldn’t mind missing out on all the partying and holidays because I would have the ultimate gift, a child.

and

I always said I would never have children. I hate kids..I do. I am just not that type of nurturing person. I was always very careful to make sure protection was in use (condoms, birth control) but I am that .1% and apparently very fertile.  I do not have that natural motherly instinct that all women seem to have, you know..that one that kicks in the moment they know they’re pregnant. I have to work really hard at it and it’s exhausting. I miss my solitude and being able to “check out” of reality from time to time.

and

Because kids aren’t the life completer we believe they are.

Are there people for whom having children completes their lives?  No doubt.  Are there parents for whom the downsides like sleeplessness and loss of personal time are outweighed by the love and joy they feel?  Of course.  Are there people who change their minds about wanting kids once they have them?  Sure.  But that’s not true for everyone.  It doesn’t happen every time, it’s never guaranteed, and the consequences are grievous when people who don’t want children have them anyway trusting that they will love the child and be happy.

We need to dispel the starry-eyed myths around pregnancy, childbirth, and marriage and create more realistic expectations.  Parenthood is too important a choice for people not to go into it with their eyes open.

[abyssopelagic-alexithymia]

“It doesn’t happen every time, it’s never guaranteed, and the consequences are grievous when people who don’t want children have them anyway trusting that they will love the child and be happy.” 

[absurdistocchiolism]

This is why being told things like ‘‘You’ll change your mind when you’re older’‘ and ‘‘Its just maternal instinct! All women got a biological clock!’‘ is so harmful and dangerous.

It invalidates what people feel about it, and makes blatant stereotypes an excuse to pressure people into doing something not only dangerous (pregnancy) but potentially mentally devastating to both unwilling and unenthusiastic parents (having unwanted children) AND children (living with parents that don’t want them). 

[antibutch-deactivated20180507]

i never want children and i want to show everyone this post who says “youll want them when your older!!”

[deniewinkle]

Christ. All of this. My new Dr. keeps telling me I'll change my mind. I keep telling her I'm 37, pretty much know what I want...

[deniewinkle]

Had a lovely anniversary dinner out with my best man. It was byob, so I brought a friend from Washington. #touriganacional #sparkmancellars #washingtonstatewine #snipesmountain #ringoffire #redwine #tasty #portugesegrapes #raisedinwashington #indianfood #lambvindaloo (at Kathmandu kitchen)

[deniewinkle]

I'm still blown away by last night. I never thought I would ever get the chance to be in the same room, breath the same air, laugh along side of one of my heroes. Last night it happened. She was so warm and inviting, candid and hilarious. Seeing her take the stage brought tears to my eyes. This was a once in a lifetime moment for me. It was soothing listening to her cadence, her intelligence and her wisdom, especially after the daily bombardment from the WH. Last night was incredible. #aboutlastnight #hillaryclinton #imwithher #stillwithher #whathappened #booktour #politicsandprose #resist #feminist #awestruck #hero #allthefeels (at Warner Theatre)

[deniewinkle]

So freaking excited! #stillwithher #hillzdawg #bffs❤️

[deniewinkle]

The kid came home on a surprise visit. #homefromcollege #surprise #kid

[deniewinkle]

Beach reading. #thesecrethistoryoftwinpeaks #twinpeaks #davidlynch #markfrost #summerreading #beach #myrtlebeach #soexcited #loglady #agentcooper #swoon (at Sands Ocean Club)

[gish]

We create, therefore we live.

[deniewinkle]

Planned Parenthood gets plenty of attention from our elected officials, just the wrong kind. Most of that attention is given by older white men, that don't seem to have a grasp of what women need and want. I wanted to portray Planned Parenthood as the organization that women want and need. An organization that I use regularly. *They serve over 2 million men and women throughout the United States. *They offer prenatal and adoption services to women, not just abortions. *They provide life saving screenings against cancer, HIV and STD's. *For a large percentage of the women that utilize their services, these are the only doctors they will see. *The women and men that work in the clinics face high amounts of hostilities and threats on a daily basis, yet they know they are doing good work. I want my elected officials to know that I stand with Planned Parenthood. I will continue to stand for them. I also want my elected officials to know that I'm not alone. #westandwithpp #plannedparenthood #gishwhesrights #womensrightsarehumanrights #istandwithpp (at Planned Parenthood of Maryland)

[deniewinkle]

Can you tell which one I feel more comfortable in? Lol This is what I’ve been up to. Can’t post what actually happened, but this is a taste to my week. #gishwhes #armygirldressedasairforce #haventwornoneofthesesince04 #armyvet #towsonuniversityveteransgroup #yaaaasssssdrillsergeant🌈

[gish]

TWELVE HOURS!

Happy You Weird’s Eve, gishers! Less than 12 hours until the list drops & all heck breaks loose. ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?

[deniewinkle]

Yaaasss!

[jamieclaire]

request - anonymous: “jamie and claire + funny moments”

[deniewinkle]

#goals

[allisonargntsarchive]

[deniewinkle]

This scene made me cry like a baby.

[lorelaigilmoure]

#queen

[deniewinkle]

I can't love C.J. any more. She was such an inspiration. Strong, feminine, smart af and kick-ass.

[izombiesource]

imrosemciver: When you’re tryna’ vogue and the guys are helping. #iZombie #SDCC

[deniewinkle]

[deniewinkle]

When you are the #Secretary of your university student group, you need to stay hip with the kids. Lol #towsonuniversity #towsonuniversitystudentveteransgroup #studentveterans #gishwhes #snapchat #towsonuveterans

[deniewinkle]

Three of my favorite things are involved with this photo. 1. Chosen family 2. Delicious wine 3. Exploding Kittens #explodingkittens #atozwineworks #pinotgris #oregonwine #theoatmeal #chosenfamily #winestagram #winesofinstagram #vino #duvin #wine