i'm gonna be your bubblegum bitch

about three things i am absoloutely positive. first, my face is magnificent. second, there is a part of me - and i don't know how dominant that part may be - that is part snake. and third, i am most definitely the most clumsy and idiotic person on the face of the planet.

[derpsily-blog]

i just want your kiss, boy, i just want your kiss | tj & lo

[otherwiseknownastj-deactivated2]

TJ didn’t mind Lo’s teasing. It was a kissing party. Everyone was being forward. And drunk. He was pretty sure Lo was drunk, but hey, everyone was. When she moved in closer her he shifted his arms to hold her waist, more for the sake of keeping her steady than as a flirtatious gesture, though he supposed it could be seen as that too. To be frank he had expected her to leap at him and kiss him sooner. Certainly he hadn’t been all that slow about it with most of his kisses. Take ten minutes to kiss and that’s only six an hour. Really that wasn’t a good strategy. So he returned the kiss as her lips met his, letting himself enjoy the kiss because he was single and kisses were meant to be enjoyed. At least he’d had enough experience in the kissing department that he didn’t have to feel insecure about his level of expertise.

When she broke the kiss he smiled back at her, keeping his hands on her waist since she hadn’t let go of his shoulders. “Usually kissing isn’t on the list waiting to be crossed off,” he replied, keeping a hushed tone since she had whispered, but not too hushed otherwise she wouldn’t be able to hear him over the music. “You don’t happen to have a boyfriend that I’m pissing off by keeping you in my arms, do you?” he asked with a raised eyebrow and an amused look on his face. “I probably should have asked that before we kissed,” he added with a chuckle, even though technically it had been Lo to initiate the kiss.

For added caution he looked over her shoulder. Nope, no guys staring jealously. Not that this told him much. He had to wonder how many couples had had to have a conversation about how much kissing was allowed to go on at the party. Certainly if he’d had a girlfriend he would have been fine with her kissing other guys for fun, so long as no one tried anything inappropriate. It was a party after all. It was meant to be enjoyed.

[derpsily-blog]

Lourdes and relationships didn't exactly mix well. Amazingly, she was a mix of clingy, neediness while still managing to sleep with/snog other people regardless of who she was dating. The one sort of relationship type thing she had had in the past had ended in a complete and utter mess. Her problem was that she liked people too much - being close to one person was never enough but despite that, she wanted them as close as possible anyway. Perhaps why that was lingering far too long on the one kiss; the alcohol had temporarily caused her to forget about all the other kisses that were to be had and instead she focused on the beat of the music and how nice his lips felt. The closeness satisfied her for the moment but only moments after they had broken the kiss she found herself getting restless again. 

"Mmmmmmm nope," she replied, popping the p and giving him another little giggle. Despite knowing that she had no significant other, she followed his gaze and looked around over his shoulder at the party. The amount of snogging couples she could spy was mad and brilliant and she couldn't help giggling all over again because it really was her kind of party. 

Turning back to him, she raised her eyebrows. "And you? Girlfriend? I could snog her too, if you wanted." Had she been sober, she probably still would have been stupidly inappropriate but, like all things, the alcohol just exaggerated it. And hey, it was that type of party, surely? But whether her next pair of lips belonged to TJ's girlfriend who may or may not have existed or to another person she sort of knew from classes and mealtimes, she should be getting on with finding them. He was right, after all, it wasn't a think that should be kept waiting. And Lo, in all her snogging extraordinaire glory, wasn't going to be to girl to do so. Still giggling (mostly at herself, because everything became funny when she was drunk, especially all of what came out of her mouth) she untangled herself from him and gave a little stumbling curtsy. "Lips to kiss!" she shouted over the music, as an explanation for her leaving, although with the current state of the party, it was pretty clear already.  

[derpsily-blog]

[derpsily-blog]

basorexia

[derpsily-blog]

You really need to stop messing with Robert. He isn't going to fuck you any quicker.

Oh pssh. Robert doesn't even know how to fuck people anyway.

[robertnott-blog]

boy, come on get your rocks off. come put a little love in my glove box. i wanna dance with you with no pants on. meet me in the back with the jack on the jukebox. | elba

[robertnott-blog]

But we’re friends.

Robert sighed, his arm were still out stretched towards her waiting and waiting for a handshake. Robro, he called her. He couldn’t understand why she kept pestering the idea of them being friends. Or at least, ‘friends’ with the quotation marks and all that. It was so ridiculous to him. Robert would always be just Robert and no one else. Sure, he’s managed to find something that was close to being friendship (but he knew it wasn’t really because he’ll never allow it to be) with Pomeroy and even Dale. Pomeroy was… Pomeroy. He had known him for a while. As far as he and Dale went, their relationship was based in shared cigarette packs and mutual silence. No talking needed. No words needed either.

“We’re not friends,” he said, correcting her. How many times would he have to say that for it to stick to her mind?

He was helping her but only if she agreed to his terms and conditions. Not because he genuinely cared about the rather unfortunate and awkward position she has found herself in without any. Not because he wanted to. (It was the last thing he wanted to do, let’s be real) It wasn’t an act done out of the goodness of his own heart. It wasn’t because they were ‘friends.’ So, he didn’t know why Elba’s face broke out into the expression that made her look like a sad puppy. 

“Good,” he said, as she finally shook his hand. It was a brief a handshake only lasting for a few moments before he let go of her hand. “Wait here,” he told her, as he continued on his way to the door. He stopped, opening the door slightly as he peered out. 

The coast was clear and it should be clear for the next while as he figured out a way to get Elba out. He turned back to her. “Good news is the coast is clear, Elba,” he said. “I doubt anyone would see us so, it’s not really something we should worry about.” He paused as he thought about what to do next - what they had to do next. (They, the word sounded weird in his head like it was two of them now. Him and Lo. Or just him and Lo just happened to be there too - that sounded better….)

“Wait,” he said, furrowing his brows a little as he tried to figure out Elba even ended up the way she did. Usually, he wouldn’t care - her business was her business but now it seemed as though they were stuck in this situation. Together, nonetheless, because he made a deal and she agreed on that deal and even though some people think he was an asshole, he would never break his end of the bargain. (So long as he kept hers, and he hoped that she would) 

“Mind telling me how you got yourself into this mess?” he finally asked. “Of course, doesn’t really surprise me that you of all people should themselves in this kind of situation…” He shrugged, fishing out a cigarette pack from his pocket and lit up cigarette.

[derpsily-blog]

The what to do next part was the difficult bit. Which, although she hadn't fully explained her half-formed plan, would possibly involve getting him to sneak into the Slytherin common room for her, since she was sure that there would be too many people about for her to venture in alone. Although knowing how reluctant he would most likely be, she decided to leave out that little detail. They could cross that bridge when they got to it.

As he checked to see if the coast was clear, she gnawed on her lip and raised a questioning eyebrow. Clear. The coast is clear, Elba. Despite definitely knowing how annoying and ridiculous she acted towards him, she did sometimes wish that she could be 'Lo' or 'Lourdes' to him, even once. She liked her first name much more than her last and it annoyed her; he sounded like a sixty year old professor with a poker shoved up his arsehole who refused to call anybody by their given name because it wasn't proper. The use of Elba earned him an eyeroll as she tugged at his jumper again. 

Lo was just about to open her mouth an apologize for probably stretching the thing when he questioned the circumstances that had lead to her unfortunate situation. With her most charming and hopefully convincing smile, she kept a straight face as she responded with, "Paying my way to good grades via sexual favours. Unfortunately I left the stripper heels in Hurst's office."

A little too late, she realised that her joke most likely broke the 'no inappropriate comment' rule that she had set out. Her apology was given by pulling a face, mouthing 'sorry' and shrugging. She had thought it was particularly funny, regardless.

"Fucking first years who think it's hilarious to imitate the spell that Poppy did to that Wood chick -- dude. Anyway. It misfired, they laughed and suddenly I was baring all to Hogwarts. Fun, fun, fun," she complained, shaking her head. From the tone of her voice it was more due to the fact that it was an embarrassing nuisance and she didn't particularly fancy the idea of people that she didn't trust getting to see all over her. To others, it may have been a much more horrendous situation. But Lourdes wasn't too easily fazed by that. Besides, her and Robert had a deal now and before they knew it, things would be returned to normal once more. 

Maybe. Hopefully. Possibly. Normal wasn't exactly a concept that Lourdes Elba embraced.

"Now. Budge. I want to go and get some clothes sometime today, Robbie."

[derpsily-blog]

i just want your kiss, boy, i just want your kiss | tj & lo

[otherwiseknownastj-deactivated2]

TJ had been one of the ones to actually arrive at the pool party on time… which meant that he was one of the first there. But it had picked up in numbers within the hour until it seemed that most of the sixth and seventh year population was crammed into the prefect’s bathroom. And for each person who had chosen not to come, it seemed that a younger student had gate-crashed in their place. He didn’t call them out on it, he didn’t mind them having some fun.

Drinking, there was a lot of drinking going on. He’d sworn to himself that he’d drink responsibly, get tipsy enough to have fun but not drunk enough to lose control. He was safety-conscious in that way. And it wasn’t even that he was worried about embarrassing himself, that he could laugh off, it was more about staying sober enough to watch out for his peers. Because with this much alcohol, especially around water, something bad was bound to happen and at least he’d be the one sober enough to intervene. Except he misjudged the strength of firewhisky, and what ‘sober’ felt like. He’d only been to a few Hufflepuff common room parties, that usually got cut short before anyone could get too drunk. So now he was pushing past tipsy and was in the middle of questioning what ‘enough’ was when he noticed Lo appropriating him.

Lo was someone he knew from class. Silly, always silly. And now with added alcohol. Her blatant attempts at trying to flirt didn’t escape him, but he welcomed it. He’d only gotten two kisses so far, and one of those from the host, Noah. The invitation had said snog all, or something like that. Certainly Lo had done a lot of that snogging, he had seen her earlier while he had been chatting and dancing with random people. “Lo!” he replied, returning the warm grin. “Yeah, it’s great. Though I’m not sure if I’m going to manage that snogging rule,” he chuckled at the ridiculous notion that, or that everyone would be able ‘snog all’, or want to, but he could understand the fun of trying.

“Do you want to cross one more off your list?” he asked, reaching out his whisky-free hand to brush some of Lo’s hair behind her ear. If he’d really been trying to flirt he would have been very tactful and polite, but there was no way anyone could get so much snogging done that way. In this situation it was easier just to grab someone unawares and plant one on their lips. Certainly he had seen that done a lot at this party. As for the snogging itself, he had to assume that everyone who had chosen to attend had seen the rule and by coming they had consented to being kissed at random.

[derpsily-blog]

"Forward," she teased, but it was a case of pot, kettle, black as she hadn't exactly been the most tactful person during the evening. In fact, she had gone up to one student and told them flat out that they had fucking nice lips before pressing hers to theirs. "And, y'know, with that approach you could jus' bout manage that rule?" she said, nodding her head over and over to the beat of the music. While TJ may have been teetering on the point of tipsy, Lo was staggering over that line. Quite impressively, if she did say so herself. 

As his hand moved to her hair, her already flirtatious smirk stretched further across her face and and she leaned in, stretching her arm around his neck. It had the added effect of steadying her which was more useful that she realised as she nearly toppled sideways only moments after edging closer to him. It only made her giggle more, finding everything intensely hilarious due to the amount of alcohol in her bloodstream. "Oops --," she tittered, gently swaying from side to side ever so slightly. 

Initially she was going to make some other slurred comment or apologize for nearly falling over but she decided 'fuck it' and, without another second more of hesitation, launched forward to kiss him. No point in waiting when there was a kiss to be enjoyed, after all. And she did so enjoy kissing and closeness and the bubbly, dizzy kind of feeling that she got from it, similar to the kind of rush that the firewhiskey had granted her. 

Although the alcohol had helped her determination and lack of boundaries (as if she really had any proper ones when sober) it had impaired her ability to kiss skillfully. Admittedly, the practice had made her somewhat of a pro at it but that was when she wasn't intoxicated and she hoped that her dizziness and soft laughter against his lips weren't too off putting. Really, she doubted that a kiss that was completely free of slight sloppiness and alcohol flavoured lips would be impossible to find at the party. And when there were perfectly acceptable other kisses available, why bother trying to look for it? 

"Never thought crossing things off lists could be this fun," she whispered, breaking away just for a few seconds to let her lips curl upwards in a pleased smile. 

[florianes-blog1]

come and open up your folding chair next to me. my feet are buried in the sand and there's a breeze. | lo & roxanne

It was Sunday and Sunday had always been a sort of lazy day. Live like a cat, she once told her mother when she was six years old explaining why Sunday was a day of fuck-all-and-not-do-shit (except, of course, she didn’t exactly use the exact words fuck-all-and-not-do-shit - that would have not ended so well) But half the day had come and gone and Roxanne was, if anything, bored out of her mind. The castle seemed to have lost its life too, which was surprising, because fire, explosions, and the occasional dungbumbs were a daily occurrence in the castle which only adds to the hormonal and obviously thrill-lusty teenagers. 

(A sure recipe for disaster but it did keep things quite stirred up, nonetheless, and that was always good for Roxanne. What was peace and quiet anyway if you were a Weasley? Peace came with the constant surroundings of people - lots of aunts and uncles, and even more lots and lots of cousins, and then extended family members and distant relations. Still a Weasley - red haired or not, by blood of marriage. That was the Weasley family; always so very welcoming! And that was what Roxanne was used to so, the peace and quiet of the school made her uncomfortable.)

The Ravenclaw common room was dead silent. She didn’t know where everyone had ran off too but to the few people who were about, they were either enthralled in their studies as they hovered over their textbooks and loose parchment biting the ends of their quills or they were napping with their bodies cuddled in the common room couches (of which, Roxanne thought to be quite stiff and so very uncomfortable - demand of new Ravenclaw couches are in order, obviously) So, she got up from where she sat, tucking the book she had in hand into her bag and made her way out of the common room and its suffocating atmosphere.

Moments later, she found herself outside. The cold autumn breeze blowing against her and stinging her cheeks. She walked, her feet threading through the grass as she made her down the small hill before she arrived in front of the lake. She titled her head, a smile inching on to her face as she recognized the familiar figure ahead of her - blonde, wild haired girls with her Slytherin robes. 

“Lo!” she called out, waving her arm as she tried to catch her friends attention. Perfect, she thought. Just the person she needed to wake the castle back.

[derpsily-blog]

Sundays were always so lifeless to Lourdes. The long, tired day before launching back into the weeks classes. Only good for sleeping in and finishing off homework. The depressing prospect of having to continue doing essays and reading textbooks for another five days after that evening brought everybody in the castle down a little, even some of the teachers. As winter approached, the days spent outside became limited too and it was frustrating being cooped up in the classrooms watching raindrops race down to the windowsills. That was particularly the reason why Lo had decided to take advantage of the dry day and take a trip down the to greenhouses. Returning via the scenic route, so as to admire the grey lake being stirred by the wind, she crossed her arms across her chest and frowned. Perhaps if winter was cold enough, they could skate on it before Christmas. 

Questioning whether she would return home over the holidays (the constant battle of her real family vs her Hogwarts family, but she knew she would most likely want to visit Lucas) she was pleasantly surprised to find interruption in the form of Roxanne Weasley waving at her. Lourdes grinned, shoving all annoying decisions out of her mind, and waving both of her arms frantically. 

Sundays were dreary, tired and depressing days, but not when you had somebody to spend the day with and brighten things up. Arms still crossed for warmth, she trudged up the bank to meet with Roxy, still beaming wide. 

"Fancy meeting you here. You know, I was thinking of going fishing, but if the pretty ladies are just going to come and find me, well," she joked, finally uncrossing her arm to loop one of them through Roxanne's. There was a hint of flirtatiousness in her voice, but then there always was when it came to Lo and her friends. It was in her nature; incurable and impossible to avoid. And she trusted that her friends, the fabulous foursome that they were, were used to her behaviour by now. On numerous occasions, without being shy about it, she had freely admitted that she fancied the pants off all of them. 

Looking around, she gave the wind that fussed up their hair a dirty glare. In fact, she was in half a mood to just stick her middle finger up to the sky, telling the weather to fuck off. Dry it was (thankfully) but cold it was too, and her extremities were feeling more and more numb as the seconds ticked on. "Please tell me you're the badass damsel come to rescue the other badass damsel from a day of boredom and woe? I'm tempted to drown myself in the lake just to show Sunday what an awful day it is. It should be ashamed of its existence."

[derpsily-blog]

i just want your kiss, boy, i just want your kiss | tj

For a girl whose main objective was to kiss everybody in sight, Lourdes Elba was doing exceptional. Seven people (admittedly including her friends) she had already planted one on. Some of them more than one, but she wasn't in a position to be particularly picky about the details.  The party was a smash hit. Slam dunk, home run, goal in the back of the net and a lot of other sports phrases that Lo certainly wasn't sober enough to remember, nevermind apply correctly to emphasize just how smashing it hard turned out to be. Although perhaps the fact that she had already drunk herself silly just proved what a success it was. The booze was flowing, the students were kissing and if they were caught now, she didn't suspect anybody to leave without putting up a fight. (Except possibly if Loring were involved as only the really intoxicated too-reckless-for-their-own-safety Gryffindors would even dare standing up to him.) Madi and Rox and Marge and Ace were all nowhere in sight; all caught up in the mass of barely clothed bodies while she had been glued to a Hufflepuff girl's face. If they has been with her for longer, perhaps her snogging tally might not have been quite as long. However the fantastic foursome was split and the eventual splashing about and jumping in and boozing with her mates would have to wait until they were reunited once more. The only thing to do in the meantime was booze alone, and attempt to find another suitable kissing partner. Her claim that she was going to snog everybody at the party may have seemed a little near impossible when she had entered the bathrooms but the sheer volume of people (surely some must be gatecrashing, she decided) did not deter her and still, she aimed at achieving this goal. (Perhaps getting as damn well close as she could was a more reasonable goal, but why aim low?) It was then that she laid her eyes on TJ, a Hufflepuff boy that she sort of knew from half her classes. Polite, pretty, -- polite? Perhaps if she were not intoxicated she would have been able to provide a better description. What mattered most to her though was that, providing he was willing, she certainly wouldn't mind adding him to her tally. In a few swift paces she found herself next to him. "TJ!" she greeted, grinning and already taking out the fluttering eyelashes while she slowly licked her lips before biting her bottom one. Normally her flirting techniques bordered on outrageous but the effects of the drinks she had knocked down only amplified them. "So the party's good s'far, yeah?"

[derpsily-blog]

KINGS AND QUEENS - ROBERT AND LOURDES

stubborn girl, uncaring boy. one light and loud and loving, the other silent and solitary and serious. it's as plain as day that she's kidding herself if she believes he feels anything beyond annoyance for her. but she's never cared for plain days and it's on a hot, noisy, summer night that she tells him all about what she wants and wants and wants. and what he wants? he wants for her to leave him be. to shut up and grow up. because love or lust or whatever she's conned herself into believing isn't a fairytale; she's not a queen and he's not her king.

j u n k y a r d page france

i was born to lie here patiently, be dragged on by the black star, and you were told to glow majestically, and love until your hands bleed

s e v e n t e e n marina and the diamonds

you teach me how to behave, i felt you question the way i was brought up as a baby, well you don't know fuck about my family

i w o n t b a c k d o w n dawn landes

well i won't back down, no i won't back down, you can stand me up at the gates of hell but i won't back down

b i g g e s t m i s t a k e ellie goulding

would it take the end of time to hear your heart's false start? you know this is your biggest mistake

p r e s c i l la bat for lashes

she's not your queen anymore (...) she really loves him, i tell you

n o t y o u r c o n c e r n the hush sound

without making excuses (and drawing conclusions) you're at it again, i am not your concern, the world will still turn

s t a d i u m l o v e metric

fight it out to wow the crowd, guess you thought you could just watch, but no one's getting out

t h e b a l l a d o f l o v e a n d h a t e the avett brothers

love writes a letter, sends it to hate (...) hate reads the letter and throws it away

w e a r e b e a u t i f u l , w e a r e d o o m e d los campesinos!

you kiss my neck,  i whisper in your ear, "this is my downfall", as you squint and you grimace, we both know your heart's not in it

BONUS. 001. s o m e t h i n g t h a t i w a n t grace potter

she's a girl with the best intentions he's a man of his own invention (…) but she followed him and he said, "what'cha lookin' for?"

BONUS. 002. b l a h b l a h b l a h ke$ha

zip your lips like a padlock and meet me in the back with a jack and the jukebox

. D O W N L O A D .

[fmavor-deactivated20140214]

[robertnott-blog]

boy, come on get your rocks off. come put a little love in my glove box. i wanna dance with you with no pants on. meet me in the back with the jack on the jukebox. | elba

[robertnott-blog]

He ignored her - barely listening to the sound of her voice. It was as though her lips were moving but the words that came out of it was just rambles and /blah, blah, blah. Her words were barely faint whispers in his ear. Whatever she was saying in reply to him - which was probably another remark that she hoped would get under his skin. She continued rambling on about boobs or Elboobs, or something like it. 

And then it was quiet. There wasn’t even the faint murmurs that her speaking had been deduced to. She had shut up, Robert realized. Odd, he noted. And then he felt her hand grabbed on to him once again, bargaining with him and practically pleading for him to help her. To help her. Ask. Robert Nott. For. Help. 

But even with the stakes that she proposed, Robert was really inclined to say ‘no’ - he helped her enough. Her upper body was covered and really that was enough. Then, it came to him that perhaps he can use this to his own advantage.

“Oh?” he asked her curiously. “No dare?” He thought about it for a moment and he didn’t know if he should trust her in making this deal. But he figured that since she was laying out the negotiation field, he would start adding some terms into that too. “Fine,” he said with a curt nod. “I’ll help you if and only if you agree to… un-dare me and no consequence thereafter for not having to do the dare. Also, no boob jokes.” There, that seemed safe enough for him.

“And, of course, you’ll have to leave me alone,” he quickly added as he held his hand out for a handshake with a self satisfied grin on his face.

[derpsily-blog]

If Robert Nott was the sort of person who takes pleasure in kicking puppies, then he should be incredibly delighted, for the expression that was settling on her face was practically identical to a very hurt little dog. In fact, she had often wondered if that would be the animal her patronus would form, could she cast one. Loyal and attentive and always looking for love. Realistically, she knew it probably wasn't likely - her more venomous side would surely influence whatever animal it was. But her resemblance to a little puppy was often quite striking. Especially so in that moment as she stared at him, eyes wide and looking rather hurt at his request. 

"But we're friends."

At least -- at least in Lo's mind. Really all she wanted was for Robert to agree with her on that, even once. She was used to people finding her actions hilarious and adorable and idiotically charming. Annoyed? Yes, that too. And those people bothered her, even if she usually pretended to shrug it off. Robert Nott bothered her more than others. He was Dale's bro, why couldn't he be hers too?

Gnawing on her lip and looking down at her green and silved painted toenails, she thought through the bargain carefully. Really, for a Ravenclaw, she expected him to a little bit more specific with his conditions. Leaving him alone could be - and was - a completely different concept in his mind than what it was in hers. If he claimed that she wasn't sticking to the bargain, she could always slip through the little loophole he had left her. That way she technically wouldn't be breaking their deal, just simply... bending it. Besides, did he honestly expect her to properly leave him alone? She could tone down her behavior (she could do that at any point, really, it was a choice she made to subject him to the full Lourdes Elba derpness) but could never properly leave anybody she genuinely considered a friend alone. 

Still keeping her face the mask of sadness and small-hurt-animal-ness, she looked back up at him. No use in alerting him of her decision to treat the conditions of the agreement as fairly flexible or else he would just back out or make it more complicated for her to consent. 

"Fine," she sighed, using her free hand to shake his. "Although I wasn't joking about the quickie thing - you might want to check the coast is clear before we both leave together." 

[flawlesslegolas]

[derpsily-blog]

Gross couple alert.

I'm placing bets on how long it takes before Piper decides he wants to teach Morrow exactly what banging means.

[robertnott-blog]

boy, come on get your rocks off. come put a little love in my glove box. i wanna dance with you with no pants on. meet me in the back with the jack on the jukebox. | elba

[derpsily-blog]

“Shame. Especially on the first one,” she teased, going so far as to wink at him, despite the fact that he couldn’t see her. Probably good, too, because one of these days she would push him too far and he would just… snap. Then Lourdes would be an Ex-Elba. Gone. Deceased. And the blood would be on Nott’s hands. 

(Or, you know, perhaps he could just shout at her and report her for creepy as fuck stalking.)

But for the while she was still alive and still unreported and still standing in front of him, baring all. Really, she was quite a fan of her pale, freckled body. Letting all of Hogwarts see it, though? Wasn’t something she particularly wanted. But around somebody that she trusted (even out of stupidity, like her trust for Robert) she wasn’t as fussed. (She had a goal to drag all of her friends into one huge game of strip poker at some point. And her poker skills weren’t anything to be proud of.) Still, she was thankful for the jumper and the warmth it brought during the chilly November afternoon. Even though Robert was quite a bit taller than her, the jumper didn’t stretch down that far. But it was good enough, if she tugged it down it could reach the top of her thighs. 

“And uncover,” she commanded, while tipping her head from side to side to get her hair out from the neck of the jumper. “And no. I’m not. I have your jumper covering my tits. I mean, thanks and all that, but I think I’m going to need something more.”

Realising what she had said, she couldn’t help let a grin spread across her face. “Oh hey, Robro! You’ve finally seen what breasts are,” she laughed and pressed her hands to her chest, mocking him and letting the hem of the jumper slide up ever so slightly, but still dangerously too high. 

[robertnott-blog]

Robro.

He cringed at hearing the petty nickname she had given him. Robert didn’t even bother telling her to stop calling him that because he knew that he would just be wasting his time and energy in that pointless argument with her. So, he had let it be and didn’t say anything about it. To him, Lourdes Elba was probably what it meant like to have an annoying little sister (only he didn’t care about what happened to her like a brother would care for a sister… the only true fact was the annoying) But annoying to Elba was a whole other level. Her frequent, creepy owl notes to him were more than weird, for lack of better words. It was borderline scary.

And he ignored it as much as he could. One day, he hoped that he would just get tired of it and leave him alone. (It seemed as though that day has not come by yet; and he hoped it would come soon)

He moved his hand away from his face and he looked at her, with a raised eyebrow. He quickly glanced down at her legs, still bare, and she tug at the sweater pulling it down. “I’m not giving you my trousers.”

Robert rolled his eyes. “I know what breasts look like!” he protested. Just because I don’t go around the school mindlessly and recklessly shagging people doesn’t mean that I’m completely ignorant about the… female anatomy, he thought to himself as he began making his way towards the door.

[derpsily-blog]

After tugging the jumper down once more she crossed her arms across her chest and stuck her bottom lip out in a pout, staring enviously at his trousers. "Damn. Although that's probably a wise call or else it would have really looked like we went from a quickie while everybody else was in potions."

His comment about breasts just made her laugh even more. One of these days, he would realise that everything she did was simply for the satisfaction of getting a reaction. And perhaps maybe then he would be able to deal with her better. But again, there it was - the reaction that only spurred her on and furthered her giggles which she tried to stifle with her palm. "Do you though Robbie? Titties, melons, chesticles... I've named mine The Elboobs. Because, you know, Elba. Nearly went for Pinky and The Brain though."

Eventually she shut up. Miraculous really, for her, but there were lines that she liked to balance on the tips of her toes on but never fully cross. And perhaps talking endlessly about her boobs was a bit... much, for Robert. God knows she had probably already freaked him out by meeting him naked in the corridor. Picking at the bottom of his jumper, she pursed her lips. Going overboard with things was in her nature; it was why a lot of people liked her (and a lot of people didn't), but when things got so extreme that she was blamed for stupid consequences of her actions or hated and threatened (joke as she might, the death threats were fucking scary) she found herself feeling guilty and annoyed and guilty. And she hated guilt. Stupid stupid. She looked up to try and meet his eyes to attempt some sort of apology that wasn't a Lopology - words instead of giving things - but he was already turning to leave.

"Wait!" she called out, and grabbed his arm. "I can't -- I still don't have much to cover me?! I... you're freed from your dare if you just help me. No more boob jokes?" Robert should have counted himself lucky that she was in such dire need of help. By her standards, it's an excellent deal.

[allstillconfessing-blog]

[sunlites-blog]

I… I don’t… What does that mean? Bang me where? Like my head against a wall, or something? That’s- that’s really mean.

[derpsily-blog]

Fuck. Screw. Shag. Sausage in donut if we’re talking in hetero terms, but this school isn’t very hetero.

[sunlites-blog]

I… I-I… okay. Wow. I mean. That’s- um. Okay. Okay.

[derpsily-blog]

Oooh, you know a good way to explain this? That super old muggle song, okay, um -- let's talk about sex, baby, let's talk about you and me, let's talk about all the good things, and the bad things that may be, let's talk about sex.

Basically they wanna get freaky with you.

[allstillconfessing-blog]

[sunlites-blog]

I… I don’t… What does that mean? Bang me where? Like my head against a wall, or something? That’s- that’s really mean.

[derpsily-blog]

Fuck. Screw. Shag. Sausage in donut if we're talking in hetero terms, but this school isn't very hetero.

[robertnott-blog]

boy, come on get your rocks off. come put a little love in my glove box. i wanna dance with you with no pants on. meet me in the back with the jack on the jukebox. | elba

[robertnott-blog]

Lourdes Elba did not shriek. Lourdes Elba did not even bother covering up her lady parts as she stood in front of him. (Robert figured that had it been any other girl - albeit there were some in this school he figured would react similarly to Lo - they would have shrieked, and covered every revealing part they could) Instead, she stood in front of him with her hands resting on her hips after pulling him into a classroom. It was followed by a witty remark of sorts and Robert could tell that she was greatly amused by this encounter.

He, on the other hand, was not.

Robert stepped back a bit, hand still covering his eyes. “No and no,” he replied. There was no way he was going to join her and her nakedness nor did he have a pair of ladies underwear at his disposal. But he knew he still had his school sweater with him. And with one hand, he maneuvered himself and his arms awkwardly as he tried to take his sweater off. “Here,” he said, throwing his sweater towards her. 

“Where the hell am I?” he said, looking around. He still hadn’t placed his hand down not before he was certain Elba had put his sweater to cover herself up. With his other hand, he began straightening out his button up shirt that he wore underneath his school sweater and began pacing back and forth until he had accidentally knocked himself over against a wooden desk.

A classroom, there was his answer. Great. He was in a classroom alone with Lourdes Elba. This should slightly worry him a bit. He stopped walking. “Are you dressed, Elba?” he asked.

[derpsily-blog]

"Shame. Especially on the first one," she teased, going so far as to wink at him, despite the fact that he couldn't see her. Probably good, too, because one of these days she would push him too far and he would just... snap. Then Lourdes would be an Ex-Elba. Gone. Deceased. And the blood would be on Nott's hands. 

(Or, you know, perhaps he could just shout at her and report her for creepy as fuck stalking.)

But for the while she was still alive and still unreported and still standing in front of him, baring all. Really, she was quite a fan of her pale, freckled body. Letting all of Hogwarts see it, though? Wasn't something she particularly wanted. But around somebody that she trusted (even out of stupidity, like her trust for Robert) she wasn't as fussed. (She had a goal to drag all of her friends into one huge game of strip poker at some point. And her poker skills weren't anything to be proud of.) Still, she was thankful for the jumper and the warmth it brought during the chilly November afternoon. Even though Robert was quite a bit taller than her, the jumper didn't stretch down that far. But it was good enough, if she tugged it down it could reach the top of her thighs. 

"And uncover," she commanded, while tipping her head from side to side to get her hair out from the neck of the jumper. "And no. I'm not. I have your jumper covering my tits. I mean, thanks and all that, but I think I'm going to need something more."

Realising what she had said, she couldn't help let a grin spread across her face. "Oh hey, Robro! You've finally seen what breasts are," she laughed and pressed her hands to her chest, mocking him and letting the hem of the jumper slide up ever so slightly, but still dangerously too high.