FIGHT ANYWAYS

THERE IS SO MUCH STUBBORN HOPE IN THE HUMAN HEART.

[determinedleader-blog]

While he's mocking some arrogant jerk on one of her competitive cooking shows- she's thrilled to bits that she got him to watch one with her- she slips away to make tea... and for something else. When she returns, she offers him a bouquet of flowers- because when has he ever gotten any?- and chuckles. "Happy Valentine's Day."

she’s done well to surprise him - he never thought she’d interrupt one of her cooking shows for this. he blinks at the flowers, mask creasing, and then a slow grin spreads over his face before he gets up to hug her. 

“fel, they’re beautiful! you shouldn’t have.”

he knows exactly where he’s going to end up putting them in his study, to brighten up the dreary case files. but before that, he’s certain they’ll make a very nice centre-piece for the romantic dinner he’s got planned later.

[determinedleader-blog]

fastestboyalive:

                                                • { ⚡ } •  

  ❝ Is that a challenge, I hear?             Beast Boy said it was too late to join the TOURNAMENT,                                           but the tournament’s over now, isn’t it? ❞

  ❝ Oh, it’s a challenge, all right –              the tournament may be over, but it would be an honour                      to defeat you too and get a second win in one day. ❞

[determinedleader-blog]

 i am not a good person.  don’t pretend i am.

growling suggestions. | accepting. | @seismicfault

his frown is the only giveaway that her words have upset him as he continues to trace patterns across tara’s hand with his index finger. it’s not too surprising that she’s voicing this concern now, at 1am in the morning. even before they were dating, they were somehow always more open with each other at night. the nature of it though, has him pausing before he speaks.

“well, you’re definitely not a bad person. you wanna know how i know?” he finally says, bringing his gaze up from their hands to her eyes. “i lied to my friends about red x. i pretended to be a thief and i fought them,” he swallows, his next words weighing heavily on his tongue. “and when i was slade’s apprentice, there was a part of me that enjoyed stealing. i’ve never admitted it out loud before, but it showed in my vital signs.”

he interlocks their hands, squeezing slightly. “despite that, i know that i’m not a bad person, because i’m not out there trying to hurt anyone for no reason. neither are you. that’s why i think you’re a good person.”

[determinedleader-blog]

@seismicfault​ replied to your post: 

watermelon is a perfectly good name

why can’t you accept your son

because i’m not ready to be a father. because i distinctly remember telling you not to get a cat. because i’m more of a dog person. because at times i feel like i am the only responsible one in the tower and the rest of the titans are my kids and i just don’t have the energy for another one.

[determinedleader-blog]

hey robin ilu i named my dog after u

“great name choice, if i do say so myself. far better than naming a fat cat after a watermelon, just to use a completely random example.”

[determinedleader-blog]

@fortunatenax​ replied to your post:

DELIGHTED GIGGLING

pipe down, cupcake

@bleakfates​ replied to your post:

if you’re a muffin, you’d be an oatmeal raisin one

at least i wouldn’t be a spinach one (look them up. they exist)

[determinedleader-blog]

Your Robin is a muffin and I love him.

“…a muffin? really?”

[spctlessminds]

based on this suggestions blog.  warning:  these are pretty dark/angry  &  could be triggering to some people.  please be cautious before proceeding!!

‘  all i want in my life is for my friends to be able to touch me suddenly  &  me to not flinch away without meaning to.  when will this stop affecting me?  ’ ‘  all i want is to be soft  &  gentle,  but i’m made out of steel  &  anger.  maybe in another life,  i guess.  ’ ‘  beauty is in the eye of the beholder,  so choose to see beauty in everything.  ’ ‘  burning it all to the ground  &  force them to start again.  they made you lose everything.  now return the favor.  ’ ‘  do i ever even cross your mind or do i do all the thinking of us on my own?  ’ ‘  do you trust me enough?  do you trust me at all?  ’ ‘  don’t you dare abandon me.  ’ ‘  even after all you have done,  i will always want you fighting on my side.  ’ ‘  every time i see you smile i fall in love with your brightness all over again.  ’ ‘  everyone i have ever loved is long gone.  i sing to the sky alone.  ’ ‘  everyone i touch gets hurt,  but i can’t stop.  i touch  &  i touch  &  i touch  &  people get hurt.  why can’t i ever stop?  ’ ‘  everyone says i used to be a hero,  but i can still taste the blood in my mouth  &  still feel bruises blooming because of my fists  &  my eyes are still stretched wide  &  terrified.  ’ ‘  everything i love has been taken from me.  what do i have left to fight for?  ’ ‘  fall in love with someone that makes you feel strong.  ’ ‘  friends are more important than any material object will ever be.  ’ ‘  i am aching to hold you  &  keep you safe,  to be pressed against you so that nothing can harm you.  ’ ‘  i am divine  &  you will bow before me.  ’ ‘  i am fucking divine.  ’ ‘  i am in control  &  i listen to no one.  ’ ‘  i am not a good person.  don’t pretend i am.  ’ ‘  i am not accustomed to love.  this is a learning experience.  ’ ‘  i am not worth saving  &  i am not worth redemption.  let me stay in the dark.  ’ ‘  i am so tired all the time,  all i want to do is rest.  ’ ‘  i am too tired to deal with any of this.  ’ ‘  i bow to no man.  ’ ‘  i broke into sharp pieces when i broke  &  i expect someone else to hurt their hands on my edges just to put me back together.  i’m sorry.  ’ ‘  i can give you your wings back  &  i can show you to fly once more,  if you only believe in me.  ’ ‘  i cannot be saved.  ’ ‘  i can’t ask for help because if i ask for help it hurts people.  i can bear this weight on my own.  i have to.  ’ ‘  i could taste the lies in your mouth every time i kissed you,  but i loved you too much to notice.  ’ ‘  i crave affection in the simplest way.  ’ ‘  i deserve to hurt.  i deserve to bleed.  ’ ‘  i didn’t ask for any of this so don’t you dare blame this on me.  ’ ‘  i don’t care if you say my name like it’s poison or like it’s a prayer,  as long as it leaves your lips.  ’ ‘  i don’t fight for you anymore.  ’ ‘  i don’t want to let go of you.  not now,  not ever.  ’ ‘  i don’t want to talk about it.  i don’t want to remember.  i don’t want to heal.  all i want is for it to go away.  ’ ‘  i don’t want you to touch me.  please don’t touch me,  just go away.  ’ ‘  i feel anger deeper than my bones.  i feel anger in my very soul.  ’ ‘  i feel nothing at all,  except for when i feel everything all at once.  ’ ‘  i have fallen  &  though i may miss the sky,  i belong here now.  ’ ‘  i have fallen from a height your mind cannot even imagine.  ’ ‘  i have no home anymore.  ’ ‘  i remember collapsing in the flames with a sword in my hand  &  then i remember nothing.  ’ ‘  i see beauty in everything,  but especially in you.  ’ ‘  i should never have fallen in love with you.  ’ ‘  i thought for a long time that i was so terrible no one would look at me.  now i know it’s because i shine so bright they are forced to look away.  ’ ‘  i was so caught up in the feeling that i forgot how to breathe.  ’ ‘  i will never amount to anything.  i am a failure in the worst type of way.  ’ ‘  i will tell myself that the burn of my loneliness in my chest completes me  &  maybe someday it will be true.  ’ ‘  if that’s what a hero is i’m glad i’m not one anymore.  ’ ‘  if you ask me to,  i will set the whole world on fire,  my dear.  it’s all for you.  ’ ‘  is it my fault?  it’s my fault.  it’s always my fault.  ’ ‘  it’s not murder if they deserved it,  right?  ’ ‘  i’m drowning in emotions that don’t belong to me,  choking on anger  &  suffocating on sadness.  ’ ‘  i’m in love with everything that hurts me.  ’ ‘  i’m okay.  i’m alright.  this is all in my mind.  ’ ‘  i’m ready to give up everything i’ve ever had if it means someone will love me.  ’ ‘  i’m so cold  &  i can’t stop shaking.  i am not who you think i am.  ’ ‘  i’m so tired all the time  &  i just want to be awake again.  ’ ‘  i’m tired of fighting against the pain of being forgotten.  i just want someone to remember me.  ’ ‘  i’m tired of fighting everything in my life.  just make it stop.  ’ ‘  i’m too tired to care.  blow up,  get angry at me.  i’m sure someday i’ll realize i deserved it.  ’ ‘  jealousy burns within me.  ’ ‘  just let me go in peace for once in my damn life.  ’ ‘  loneliness is a disease  &  it leaves me empty  &  hollow,  like sound goes through my body  &  bounces back.  ’ ‘  made of starlight  &  sunshine,  i shine brighter than they all know.  ’ ‘  my anger is righteous  &  my actions are pure.  ’ ‘  my chest aches  &  my lungs burn.  this sickness comes from the inside.  ’ ‘  my chest hurts  &  all i need is some comfort  &  understanding.  ’ ‘  my chest hurts  &  i ache to go back to the sky.  ’ ‘  my shoulders are aching where wings used to be  &  all i want is for them to stop hurting.  ’ ‘  pull me apart  &  piece me together in your own way.  make me perfect.  ’ ‘  righteous fury throws through my veins  &  if you touch the people i love i will destroy you.  ’ ‘  rise up.  you can’t keep being small when you were made for so much more.  ’ ‘  say my name like it’s the only one that’s ever been on your tongue.  ’ ‘  so much blood has been spilled in my name.  time to make you believe it was in yours.  ’ ‘  so you’ll worry about me when i fall silent,  but not when i scream  &  plead for help?  fuck off.  ’ ‘  sometimes people have to get hurt for me to get what i want.  ’ ‘  stay away from my fucking friends.  stay the fuck away or so help me i will destroy you.  ’ ‘  stop treating me like i’m an idiot.  you aren’t better than me in any way  &  you better remember that.  ’ ‘  the bitter taste of regret is ever present on my tongue.  ’ ‘  the world is spinning far too fast for me to stay on it.  ’ ‘  to love them is my divine right.  ’ ‘  voices whisper from the shadows  &  they fill my mind with thoughts of you.  ’ ‘  what did i to wrong to be so unloved?  ’ ‘  what is the point of power if i’m not supposed to use it?  ’ ‘  who the fuck do you think you are?  ’ ‘  why can’t i ever fucking stop crying?  ’ ‘  with a new year comes new tests  &  triumphs.  let’s try to make the most out of it.  ’ ‘  would it really kill you to be honest for once?  ’ ‘  yes,  i remember my wings breaking  &  being destroyed.  i was powerless to stop it.  ’ ‘  you are not required to love your parents,  or to even like them.  ’ ‘  you can’t hate me more than i hate myself,  but you are more than welcome to try.  ’ ‘  you may say you love me,  but you love only a part of me.  i am too complex for you to ever love my entire being.  ’ ‘  you never fucking cared about me.  don’t fucking lie about it.  not to me.  ’ ‘  you remind me of mint.  fresh,  sharp,  kind of cold,  but in a nice way.  i always knew there was a reason mint was my favorite.  ’ ‘  you shine light in even the darkest parts of me.  you are my sun.  ’ ‘  you should fear me,  but you don’t.  i will be eternally puzzled,  yet grateful.  ’ ‘  you touch me  &  my skin burns  &  it burns for you,  always you.  ’

[determinedleader-blog]

fortunatenax: 

@determinedleader ( continued from here )

“Then let me enjoy it while I can.” She mumbles, though any edge in her voice is instantly negated in how she practically leans into his touch. “But you gotta stay till then, got it?” … Okay, maybe she’s a little too sleepy to make demands, but whatever. Sleep was always a little harder in the winter for her, so as far as she was concerned she’d earned her tiredness.

“Don’t worry, I’m staying as still as possible just for you, your highness.” He’s teasing, but there’s a fond smile on his face. He stops petting her hair to place a kiss on the top of her head before continuing to scroll through his phone absentmindedly. “I have to question your judgement, though. Of all the places to lean on, you chose the one that’ll be gone in a few minutes?”

[determinedleader-blog]

it is too dang early, and very cold, and she demands cuddles so she is going to just press her face into his shoulder while dragging a blanket over.

early mornings are definitely something robin and jinx disagree on. he’s always believed that the early bird gets the worm – even if there’s a joke in there somewhere about how he’s literally the bird in question.

when jinx rests against him, he lets out a quiet chuckle and pauses scrolling through the news on his phone in favour of petting her hair instead. 

“don’t get too comfortable. you know i’m gonna get up and go work out in a few minutes.”

[determinedleader-blog]

okay so i have:

deleted all my drafts and asks to get a fresh start

edited my rules/other pages a little

unfollowed almost everyone because i really wanna keep my following list to a minimum so that i don’t get overwhelmed with threads anymore (if we were mutuals before and you still wanna interact with me just let me know i’ll refollow!!)

started the process of trying to remember how to write robin l m a o

[determinedleader-blog]

what if... i came back here

[determinedleader-blog]

seismicfault:

the apartment – quiet, dark – smells distinctly familiar and reminiscent of adolescent nights spent curled together, her nose pressed against the curve of his neck. from her perch at the open window, still with one foot on the frame, the other on the floor, her hand keeping the glass up, tara’s gaze roams across the room until she settles on the blanket covered bump on the bed.

( surprising, really, that he hadn’t startled awake at the creak of the window and the thump of her foot on the floor, but maybe he’s awake, just pretending to sleep to ignore her presence.

it’s the last time, he always says, but then she’s back at his window or his door or at the diner down the end of the block, and he says it again at the end. )

“dick?” // @determinedleader

dick had woken as soon as he heard tara pull the window up. it wasn’t a surprise. he still couldn’t bring himself to lock the window at night, despite his insistence that this -- whatever this was -- had to stop. maybe because locking it probably wouldn't make a difference anyway.

he contemplates just lying there, wondering what tara would do. would she slip into bed and wrap her arms around him from behind, just like she used to do when they were younger? the memories, even now, make his chest ache. 

tara knows him well enough to know that she’d have woken him up, though. with a resigned sigh, he rolls onto his back, staring up at the ceiling as he addresses her. “hello, tara. do you think there will ever come a day where you actually listen to me?”

[determinedleader-blog]

hi i know i'm not really here anymore but i miss you all 

[determinedleader-blog]

"Hey, Robs... y'got a minute?"

@fastestboyalive

He raises an eyebrow, turning to face his friend with a smile. “Sure, KF. What’s up?”

[cosmiicinferno-deactivated20210]

determinedleader replied to your photoset: kazncn-art: starfire being protective of her…

fuck

[determinedleader-blog]

little bit hypocritical, aren’t you, star?

[laquilasse]

your birdflash art is the best thing in the world....... i look at it everyday to remind me there is still good in the world. ty for blessing our lives with high quality dick and wally content !!!!

it’s my absolute pleasure <3

[fastestboyalive-a]

@asterbatics @determinedleader