Devious Minx

NSFW 18 years or olderJust a girl fumbling through the BDSM fog. #minxthinks #minxphotography #myjourney

[deviousminx]

Upset...

I have been on a trip for about a week and returned home yesterday.

Following a semi-intense scene with Master, we laid in bed chatting as I was coming out of subspace. Master is happily chatting away and somewhere in the middle of conversation decided to tell me he made another sub cum while I was gone. Immediately, I felt myself snap out of subspace. I was upset. My blood was boiling but as a rule to myself, I showed no emotion. I just listened as he chatted away. I mean I couldn’t really protest it since it had already happened. I couldn’t change the course of what I felt and I definitely couldn’t tell him. So I sat there quietly with my head down and attempted to appear unfazed but it affected me and in the long run, it will probably affect our dynamic. Granted he did tell the sub that I was his slave, it didn’t matter to me.

I’m unsure if I was jealous that he had made another sub cum while I was away or if it was the fact that he had basically cuckold me (without my knowledge) since I permitted from cumming.

I feel myself pulling away from Master and no longer wanting to talk to him. I refuse to text him as often as I used to and I refuse to hold long conversations with him.

I know that I am hurt…be it my pride or my ego…I know, yet again, I am not enough.

[deviousminx]

'Cause I'm BOSSY!!!

Today I was helping Master with a huge project for work. While he was happily chatting away, I stopped him mid-sentence and said "WRITE." His response..."SO BOSSY!!!" 🤣🤣🤣 I don't think as a slave I've ever been called bossy. 😘Minx

[deviousminx]

Spoiled chattel

Today, for work, we had a private screening of a new movie but because I hadn’t been to work in a week I could not participate.

The movie was one that I had been longing to see. I was ecstatic over the fact that my company had decided to sponsor us all to go and watch it as a unified group. But I could not attend.

Last night, Master had concocted a plan. I was told to meet him at his job in the morning, we’d eat breakfast, and then we’d go and see the movie.

Ok…no big deal. But for me, it was a HUGE deal!!!

Without a doubt, Master spoils me. There is a reason he calls me Kate.

I knew he had a big project coming up and I assumed we just get breakfast and get through the project. But we didn’t.

Today, we enjoyed breakfast, the movie, and a little quiet time in the darkroom.

Simply put…it was BLISS and at the end of the day I was one happy, content, and spoiled chattel.

😘 Minx

[klists-blog1]

52 Lists Project

1. List your goals and dreams for this year. 2. List your favorite characters from books, movies, etc. 3. List the happiest moments of your life so far. 4. List the soundtrack of your life right now. 5. List what you would like your life to look like in ten years. 6. List the ways you love to have fun. 7. List all the people who brighten your day. 8. List your favorite quotes. 9. List the things you treasure most. 10. List the things you should ignore. 11. List the ways you can rejuvinate your space. 12. List your best qualities. 13. List the things that always cheer you up. 14. List the ways you can cleanse your life for spring. 15. List your dream trips. 16. List your essentials. 17. List the difficult moments in your past that have shaped you for the better. 18. List the things that motivate you. 19. List the people you most want to be like. 20. List the things that make your spirit feel free. 21. List the things you want to make. 22. List your favorite places you have been. 23. List the things that make you laugh. 24. List your quirks. 25. List the things that make you feel powerful. 26. List the things you would change in your life right now if you could. 27. List all the things that make you feel healthy: Mind, body, and soul. 28. List the wildest things you want to try. 29. List your childhood and current dream jobs. 30. List the qualities you admire most in others. 31. List the words that define your personality. 32. List the ways you get energized. 33. List the ways that you are a leader. 34. List the things that make you excited. 35. List the obstacles that stand in the way of facing your dreams. 36. List everything you love to do outdoors. 37. List what you would spend a million dollars on just for you. 38. List the ways you can love yourself more. 39. List the most beautiful things you have ever seen. 40. List your top twenty mood boosting songs. 41. List all of your favorite things about fall. 42. List the things that make you feel peaceful. 43. List your favorite meals and treats. 44. List the words that warm your spirit. 45. List the things that make up your ideal holiday season. 46. List your greatest comforts. 47. List the things you are grateful for. 48. List the things you want to add to your life. 49. List your favorite books. 50. List your accomplishments. 51. List the things that you want to be known for. 52. List the most memorable moments of your year.

[deviousminx]

My project for next year.

[deviousminx]

I am not...

It’s not because I don’t want to be or am incapable of being…I’m just not and it’s ok.

For a few days my mind has been “caught up.” It’s been trying to wrap it’s head around who/what am I.

I know, without a doubt, I fall on the s-side of the slash. It took me many months and countless hours of self evaluation to finally come to terms that I am a submissive. But am I a slave? More importantly, am His your slave?

The last couple of days I have been researching yet I still sit here confused about what is what so I’ll start with simple definitions…

sub•mis•sive (səbˈmɪs ɪv) adjective 1. inclined or ready to submit or yield to the authority of another; unresistingly or humbly obedient: submissive servants.

slave (sleyv) noun 1. a person who is the property of and wholly subject to another; a bond servant. 2. a person entirely under the domination of some influence or person:

Here’s what I understand…

As a submissive, I’ve learned it quiets my mind and allows me a few moments of inner peace. I don’t have to think about anything. There are no conversations in my head, no worrying about what needs to be done, and no thinking about my friends and their issues. When I submit, I leave myself open to only that moment.

It’s in these moments when the dominant challenges me that shifts my mindset. All I need to think about is the task at hand. Regardless of what it may be, I know what needs to be accomplished.

As for being a slave, well that for me, is open to interpretation. I don’t understand what it means or what it entails.

Can I be the property of someone? Sure that doesn’t bother me.

Can I be entirely under the domination of someone? Unsure.

I’m not very good at listening…not because I don’t want to but merely oftentimes I hear with misinterpreting ears. Being a slave means following someone else blindly and that tends to get people in trouble. I have to have the ability to trust someone wholly and hope that their intentions are good. SOOOOOOOO NOT ME! I believe people have hidden agendas. Oftentimes, it has been proven, that people will often do things that’s best suited for themselves.

On another note, I’m unsure if I know how to be co-dependent. When one is a slave, Master’s command is final. My voice, my thoughts, and my needs are at the mercy of Master. How does one come back whole after submitting so much of themselves to one person?

Therefore, as I sit here weighing the pros and cons, I’m left with only one realization…as much as I want to be, I do not qualify as His slave.

[deviousminx]

Trying it on for size...

A vanilla girlfriend is getting married in July; last night the bride and another vanilla friend was with me while I had a fitting for my bridesmaid dress.

I had just had a session with Master the day prior so I knew my thighs and breast were splattered with bruises. This wouldn’t be the first time either of them had seen me nude nor would it be the first time they’d seen my body adorned with bruises, yet I was still unsure of what their reactions would be.

I undressed for the fitting leaving only my thong on, both my girlfriends took one look at me and said…

“Looks like someone went in for a session last night.”

I started giggling and they both broke out into a smile. All I could think was, damn how did I get so lucky to have such wonderful friends. 😊

😘 Minx

[deviousminx]

Last night Master told me I was beautiful…

I was sitting in front of him naked with nothing but his chains adorning me. I was staring down at the floor unable to meet his gaze. My mind was in minor subspace, it was clear and calm yet I could feel desire coursing through in my veins. When I was finally able to look up at him, he told me I was beautiful and I couldn’t say a single thing. If my cheeks could flush, they probably would have but instead of making me feel warm and fuzzy, it left me rather cold.

I know I’m not the most gorgeous woman on the planet and I know how to take a compliment, but, for some odd reason, last night when Master told me I was beautiful, instead of saying “Thank you, Master” and moving on, I felt my mind shift into a very defiant woman. I felt myself shut down. I became quiet but my mind was complete chaos. It wasn’t the first time Master told me I was beautiful, but it was definitely the first time I felt myself react to it in a negative way.

The commands came and I obeyed them; all while my head was a mess. My body already bore His bruises, welts, and teeth marks from an earlier session yet I couldn’t shake the feeling of wanting to be defiant.

I wanted to lash out and scream, beat the hell out of a punching bag but I sat there, quiet as ever, allowing my feelings to evaporate and focused on my task at hand.

“Make Master happy. Make Master proud.”

Bit by bit, I became my submissive self and found my happy place. I finally understood another part of myself. I learned that I don’t have to be perfect to be beautiful. I don’t need clothes, makeup, or jewelry to make me who I am. When I am stripped raw and vulnerable, this is who I am. I am submissive and I am beautiful.

[deviousminx]

The hardest question…

During my time in the scene, I’ve been asked a plethora of questions. Majority of the time it’s easy to answer and my response comes almost automatically. Unfortunately, tonight I got asked the hardest question I’ve ever had to answer…

What are your hobbies?

hobby [hob-ee]

noun, plural hobbies. 1. an activity or interest pursued for pleasure or relaxation and not as a main occupation: Her hobbies include stamp-collecting and woodcarving.

This person already knew of my love for traveling and theme parks but those things are rarities for any person living on a tiny island. So I sat there in thought, baffled that I couldn’t come up with an immediate answer.

A few seconds later, said person prompted “Is writing your hobby?”

I replied “Yes” but that really isn’t what writing is for me. When I write, it’s a chance for me to process, to think, and to question everything I thought I knew.

Hours later and I’m still sitting here wondering…WHAT THE HELL ARE MY HOBBIES? Between work and family, I leave very little time for myself. Whatever time I do have left is usually used for friends but even that isn’t considered hobby.

Would being submissive be considered a hobby? What about cumming multiple times a day?

I’d say neither of those things would be appropriate answers so I sit here confused.

If I’d had to choose what interest me…it’s browsing through actual bookstores, exploring new places, and learning new things but none of those would be considered a hobby.

So I’m left here with the pieces of myself that I know and still questioning…what the hell do I do for fun?

[deviousminx]

Poetry

had always had a soft spot in my heart. I love the feeling of the excitement and the loss of the heartache. I don't want to just read words on a page...I want to fucking feel them!!!!

[deviousminx]

I was rather flabbergasted yesterday when he had given me a gift. I graciously accepted it, yet I was rather in awe of how much he spoils me. I am so spoiled that he calls me Kate (The Taming of the Shrew). Yet he has no one to blame but himself for my spoiled nature. 

😘 Minx

[deviousminx]

The gift of Dominance…

I had always heard the phrase, submission is a gift…and yes I’ll agree that it is.

I, for one, had always believed that my submission was a gift. One that I had given semi-freely attempting to find my place in the community. Yet, all the dynamics I found myself in weren’t fitting for me. I had found myself at a crossroad unsure if I was understanding what it meant to be on the s side of the slash.

I thought being on the s side meant I was to mold myself into whatever a Dominant needed. I was to be a “Yes Sir” type of submissive because anything else would suffice as a brat. I had taken on challenges, followed rules, and thought I was being the best sub I could be. Yet each time I left a session, I felt uneasy about who I was. I was essentially unsure of myself.

In my previous dynamics, I had simply “played” at being submissive but I never really became submissive. I would allow the Tops to control the scene and push certain limits; limits that were pretty nonexistent since I had very little understanding of BDSM.

Then I met someone…

He is someone with a very dominant personality. He commands attention without even noticing it. He is dangerous; not because of what he does with/to others but because he always finds the core of a submissive. He figures out what makes you tick, how you react to any situation, and how your body responds. He gets into your head and observes you and that, that makes him dangerous.

But what he also does is…

He makes me think. During a scene, he gives me a few moments to myself to allow me to process what just happened. It gives me time to figure out if I want to continue the scene or if I need to stop.

He pushes my limits. Whether it’s BDSM or vanilla, he pushes me to become a better person and in essence, I have become truer to myself.

He allows me to step out of my submissive skin and just be me. I don’t have to be a submissive all the time; sometimes I can be just a friend. I can call him to vent if I’ve had a rough day.

And overtime, I had found that I am submissive and not just playing at it. I found myself sinking in moments and becoming submissive. I haven’t fully accepted my submissive self but I’m getting there. I’m learning and I’m growing so as much as people say submission is a gift…I believe so is dominance.

[woman-believe-in-love]

[sexy-is-a-state-of-mind]

For the love of socks… ;) xo

[deviousminx]

She is definitely sexy!!!

😘 Minx

[in-pain-we-trust]

[deviousminx]

So seductive!

😍 Minx

[deviousminx]

Challenge Me

There was a challenge set before me, 10 pictures, and I was on a mission. Myself and my favorite photographer woke up at 4am to do this shoot at dawn. He captured this just as the sun was rising over the east side of the island. I am in love with the final product and I am always amazed at how he manages to capture some of the best photos of me. I will be forever grateful for his amazing talents and for winning the photo challenge.

😘 Minx

[deviousminx]

A new meaning to a candle light affair.

😘 Minx

[deviousminx]

Photoshoot… Back on 10.25.15, I had an amazing photoshoot with one of the best photographers in the bdsm industry. The Mistress of the house is freaking amazing. I’ve been admiring her work for quite some time. To watch her shoot and become a part of her vision was an awesome experience. One that I can gladly check off my list of things to do. ☑️ photoshoot with an amazing photographer & a bunch of kinksters

😘 Minx