sedate me

serial reposter. it seems that's I'm a GSGW novel blogger now? whatever else interests me to speak ✨21✨

[deyanira18]

Spoilers for up to chapter 235

One Braun is such an instigator, he really does want KSE to do very entertaining things, this is like making my partner play scary games for my own amusement. LMFAO

But two I feel like KSE's making the same point I was making, the cult (the Church of whatever) doesn't feel like a real cult. It seems more like a place of research than a Church. KSE (and maybe the author themselves) is trying to justify that the Church isnt a proper cult bc it wasn't fully world built in the wiki or something similar but I feel like that's a misdirection bc there's been times where KSE said before that he's experiencing something that was never mentioned in the wiki like a deeper story to it you know?

[deyanira18]

The fact that any birth control women pick comes with some crazy side effects like 50% of the time (my statistic not factually checked) like hormones that cause acne, or weight gain or depression!! Is insane and even tho I got the non normal birth control my PERIODS ARE SUPER HEAVY NOW??

Real respect to the people who naturally had heavy periods bc I can't imagine being a teenager and dealing with all this blood and pain in highschool 😭

this sucks enough at work dude and I'm just doing my best to not bleed thru everything especially since my entire team is just dudes they're nice and all dads but STILL! 😭 Sobbing actually I don't usually care about people knowing about periods and stuff but man I wanna not do that work? Like it's just uncomfortable

[deyanira18]

Spoilers up to chapters 233

Also literally wrote this all in my notes app I feel like I'm evolving omg. I feel like all my posts are nothing but open ended questions that I'll never get answers too

Tbh I'm kinda confused with the whole Heowoon thing, I'm just guessing that the cult (Church of the Luminous Unknown) is trying to recreate the person who is Lee Heowoon, and Jang and Kim (Heowoon) are all just attempts to become same person? (Unwillingly and unethically ofc) I'm guessing bc Lee had some interesting effect as a person (on society) possibly bc if it was information they were trying to get it makes no sense to recreate the way they grew up and major life experiences they had.

Also! More information on the sects of the cult I'm not too sure how many, if they mentioned it, of the cult there are but the cult itself sounds more like a research thing than a cult. I believe cults usually just worship their god and just try to reach them in whatever ways they seem to be correct. (Very short and bad explanation of what I think a cult is) But the Church of Luminous seems to have different sects that all have different ways/paths? Of attempting to summon? (That weird village) their god Ireum, which I feel like is very odd of a cult to do usually any other way of connecting to their god is some kind of hearsay?

Also Kim Heowoon's death was so unexpected 😭 I didn't have any real attachment to him as a character but still mindless death sucks, I kinda do wish he became apart of KSEs little resort or just people but I get why he didn't do that one just a burden thing he'd be responsible for him, 2 it's uncomfortable having that kind of servitude of a person but 3 KSE wanted him to live which I feel makes it suck that he just literally died in front of him. I'm assuming when KSE gets back to a semblance of normalcy he's gonna think back to all these fucked moment and just go holy shit and then freak out.

[lili-is-an-artist-not]

Brausol- Toxic Yaoi

Choisol- Yaoi

Bronsol- BL

Hosol- Yuri

Jaysol- furry

Jahsol- scaly

Solsah- roleplay

[lili-is-an-artist-not]

Thank you

Kwaksol- Monster fucker

Hope this helps 👍

[deyanira18]

Guess who's fuckin backk

Up to chapter 229 spoilers

Okay one J3 is so fucking funny like I always thought that his weird rivalry with the researcher Kwak Jegang (I hope the name is right it's been a minute) its kinda one sided like KSE said but also not really Kwak is just a provoker or instigator 😭 and J3 is just I can kill you know? If he ever goes too far

ALSO JUMPSCARE?? Director Ho terrifying actually did not expect that, and the roulette wheel! I hope this gives him some hope or something I forgot how depressed part 2 has been please get better 🙏🏻

But Director Ho being is interesting I wanna hope he's connected to Cheerful Research Institute but at the same time I feel like that connection would be too easy? If that makes sense I think he's probably some middle man to be able to communicate to both the Institute and Daydream Inc. but that's my theory (:>)

[deyanira18]

Literally so sorry to anyone who followed me expecting constant posts abt the novel 😭 part 1 genuinely drained the crap outta me plus I got a new job! I start today so I was also preparing for that and being nervous.

But I will be back! I actually have like at least 30 minutes on the train to read and since the trains move so fast the Internet is spotty at best and there's no wifi on the train it's a commuter train so nothing but time to readddd

[vee-dmsr]

EVERYONE SHUT THE FUCK UP WE'RE GETTING A BUBBLINE SHOW???? OH MY GODDDD

[deyanira18]

Spoilers up to 227

Ugh I'm still so sad about Jang Heowoon's death, it felt so sudden but I was pretty happy that he was "alive"? I guess

I'm assuming either he got over his contamination with the bureau, since it's like daydream where they leave to be as human as possible but they're not fully human anymore you know?

I'm guess this means he didn't use his wish? Or even got it since he's working at Daydream again for another one. 😭 Depressing but kinda happy he's still around. Please give him a better ending author 🙏🏻

[deyanira18]

Collections of sweet moments between KSE and Braun literally just from 218 I'm sorry I'm kinda obsessed

I love that KSE knew it was a fake plush and exactly why it was fake in its specific differences between the original plush and the new one he made that's like so sweet. He really paid attention to Braun 💞

BRO IS SO MAD ABOUT THIS

Hilarious he's so offended about being ignored, but I mean give KSE some slack he's disassociating hard man

GAY! 🫵🏻 GAY ASF, I kind of see KSE contaminated form as an extension of him? Kinda how the masks the employees get kinda symbolize their personalities. I feel like his appearance now is still him, which is why I think it's sweet that Braun still likes how KSE looks, still finds him attractive

[deyanira18]

Spoilers! But screenshot moment from 218 that I think is sweet Braunsol

AWW BRAUN WAS OFFENDED

Kinda funny, very sweet but I too would feel offended after being accused of not caring when I was right there the entire time trying to help but not forcing anything.

I get you Braun, 😖 but I'm also glad that KSE kinda felt the need to say that you know, feels like he also cares since he cares enough to get mad that Braun seemed to just appear when it was convenient for him.

You know the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference.

[deyanira18]

Actual spoilers for 218

Okay so one, KSE feels like he's suffering from a disconnect from reality that's kinda real since he knows that's not his real world but also he's able to die in this ghost world.

But also! After the wish failed and he was kinda taken over be it by the wish or his inner contamination self thing idk, I think he can't figure out if he's human or not if he's actually KSE from his og world or just an entity summoned into a vessel (like the good friend plush) and then bc of the contract (thanks daydream inc) he's thinking does it really matter? I feel that part tbh I used to sleep a lot to avoid my feelings of depression.

Anyways I love that Braun has been there from the beginning, and also I kinda like how they keep referencing the good friend plush and using it to point out that their friendship (and bond?) is now beyond the plush and it's rules they're just friends, strange friends with different priorities but still friends.

Braun and been trying to help from the beginning he's so sweet and now he's kinda being like the fox counselor to help KSE get out of his head, his mask? As Braun calls it? Not sure didn't finish lol but anyways

Braunsol for life 💞😌

[deyanira18]

I was gonna do a spoiler warning but I don't think this is really spoilers just funny. But this is the start (kinda) of part 2

LOL Braun, idk if this intentional 4th wall breaking I don't think it is, but it is kinda meta (I hope I'm using that right) and that was so funny omg made me giggle

[deyanira18]

Spoilers for chapters up to 217

I realized that's probably a more accurate way to describe the spoilers lol.

But BRAUN HES BACK OMG

tbh from the beginning of part 2 to now I was a little confused, I think it was a little hard to follow the story since it wasn't in KSE's pov and others who never end up being named.

I'm sure there's parts that I just glossed over and didn't fully understand to get to parts where it did make sense. You know understanding thru context clues.

Also! Found out thru fanfic 😌 that's KSE is the abbreviation for Kim Soleum, which is nice cuz one I had no ideas what KSE stood for lol but also calling him Kim or Sol felt weird lol.

But more importantly BRAUNNNN MY GOOD FRIEND HES BACK I love him he's consistently been a source of comfort for KSE even if he gives awful advice 😖 shit source of comfort me man 😭

[deyanira18]

After a much needed 2 day break I will start part 2 tmw or today cuz it's like 1:30 am

Chapter 208 and the chapters leading up to it were so emotionally taxing (in a good way ) that I genuinely needed a vacation weekend

My emotions were literally 📉📉📈📉📈📉📉📉📈📉📉📉 immediate crash on chapter 208

They warned me but did not warn me enough I fear

I did however relax with braunsol or solbraun, idk which I prefer, fics thank you oh great fic authors 🙏🏻

[deyanira18]

I hate being right

[deyanira18]

I'm gonna go insane this fuck ass novel has been giving me a rollercoaster of emotions omfg

[deyanira18]

One this is for chapters 180 to 190 I forget where exactly it was

Two I'm getting real close to chapter 208 and I am not happy

Three THIS IS GETTING DEPRESSING

My braunsol heart is in pieces, they're back together again but it's not the same 😭 I know why it's not but still it's low-key depressing and not at all comforting, doomed yaoi fr

But agent choi 😭😭 my man he very much acted like a himbo for most of the series but he truly showed how capable he is but it was for nothing as FUCKING DIRECTOR HO had to get in the middle of shit not fun this is not fun

Poor sol man he just wants to go homeeeee I can completely understand I wanna go home too dude, but Braun being more toxic than before, Agent Choi's life hanging on a thread and then THE TIME LIMIT 😭 I'm gonna commit this is getting depressing