beep beep
This is a masterpiece
YOU ARE THE REASON

Andulka
Mike Driver

ellievsbear
Xuebing Du
taylor price

bliss lane
will byers stan first human second

tannertan36
Not today Justin

PR's Tumblrdome
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸
Misplaced Lens Cap
đŞź

â

Love Begins

Product Placement

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
RMH

oozey mess
seen from Italy
seen from Indonesia
seen from Indonesia
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Vietnam

seen from Malaysia
seen from Tunisia

seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from Venezuela
seen from Pakistan
seen from United States
seen from Oman
seen from Iraq
seen from Venezuela
seen from Mexico

seen from Spain
seen from United States
@diaryofanoboe
beep beep
This is a masterpiece
Normal people: Tri-plet
Music kids: Tri-puh-let
a mini lesson in musical terminology
piano
FORTE
áľáśŚáľâżáśŚË˘Ë˘áśŚáľáľ
FORTISSIMO
áśĘłesCENDO
DIMINuenáľáľ
SFáľĘłzaNDO
a  d  a  g  i  o
a n d a n t e
allegro
rit a r  d  a  n  d   o
a   c   c  e  l  e  r a ndo
stac- ca- to-
leeggggaaatttoooo
Okay so it seems like people will call any mallet percussion instrument a xylophone and Iâm here to teach you shit.
This is a xylophone. The wood part is thick and itâs high pitched.
This is a marimba. Itâs huge and expensive. No like a small one costs over $4,000 (3186.20 euros). The key things are really long and thin.
Now do you see this beautiful instrument? This is called the vibraphone motherfuckers. Or just the vibes. Anyways it sounds amazing. I could marry the sound. Basically, it;s made of metal and you have a pedal to stop it from ringing too long.
This is the glockenphejksdfjkl. I have no idea how to spell it, so lets just call it the orchestral bells. If you hit this shit too loud it can burst your eardrums.Â
These are a joke.
I live how angry op is
Sure are a lot of xylophones on this post.
"You play an instrument! Play something for us!"
If you bend a flute, is it
A floot loop
Where does one buy a vehicle of such quality?
@suffering-musician
now that is how to drive in style
So, where does this Van Gogh?
I donât think anyone can handel this van
@diaryofanoboe
when you get a piece full of fast runs with really uncomfortable fingerings
walking into private practice with a new piece
teacher:
after they hear the first note:
I listened to a professional recording of this and you could actually hear the violinists slowly put down their instruments and mutter âthis just isnât going to happenâ
looking at this makes my head hurt
I was going to say âfuck flatsâ but I have to keep my blog content pg-12
then I realized I could shorten that to âeff flatsâ
but then I realized
f flat
Things Musicians do When They Play a Wrong Note
A bit of music humour for those of us who have played instruments or sang in a choral ensemble. I assure readers that all of these are accurate, having spent the last 17+ years of my life around these people. :)
First Violins: Screw up your face and pluck your strings as if making sure they are in tune.
Second Violins: What wrong note?
Violists: Adjust the placement of the viola on your shoulder, or else completely retune your instrument, no matter how bad the timing is.
Cellists: Make a big show of tightening/loosening your bow hair, or stop playing entirely. Ask the conductor to retune your instrument.
Bassists: Oh, what, were we supposed to play there?
Clarinetists/saxophonists: Check the placement of your keys; when further wrong notes are played (or if discovered that all keys are present), make a show of checking your reed for cracks or fiddling around with the ligature.
Oboists/Bassoonists/English Hornists: Take your reed off, take your reed knife out, and âtrimâ your reed.
Trumpeters: What do you mean, âwrong note?â We were right - the rest of the orchestra was playing the wrong notes.
Trombonists: Donât notice the wrong notes -Â thereâs too many of them to choose from.
French Hornists: Adjust your mouthpiece and 37 different pieces of your instrument.
Tuba Players: Play even louder in hopes that will make up for the wrong note, therefore drowning out the rest of the orchestra.
Euphonium/Baritone Players: Oh, well, life goes on.
All Brass Players: Blow through your instrument, making sure it didnât get too cold during the 3 beats of rest; always good is taking out your cleaning cloth and pulling all the nasty stuff out of your instrument and dumping it on the floor. The audience is now too grossed out to notice the wrong notes.
Flautists: Stare blankly at your flute for a moment, then pull out a bit. If still wrong, pull out even more and hope that did the trick.
Percussionists: Giggle and joke about it with the rest of your section; miss your next cue and giggle again, causing the conductor to stop the entire rest of the orchestra.
Guitarists: Hey, man, I $%#&ed upâŚletâs go back to the beginning (even if 2 lines from the end of the piece, as you have no clue where you were in the first place).
Accordionists: Who cares? The rest of the people vacated the room long before the wrong note.
Sopranos: Fake a coughing fit or give a dirty look to the soprano next to you.
Altos: (grumbling) Why fix it? Nobody will notice anyways, right?
Tenors: Crack a joke, apologise to the conductor, and get on with your life.
Basses: Youâre singing so low that theyâll all swoon even if the note is wrong
I am astounded by the accuracy
Pianists: Take hands off piano keys, rub them and make exaggerate facial expressions of pain and/or laugh at yourself and play again.
Anyone who says theyâve never held bigoted beliefs is 100% a liar. We get older and we learn better and we grow more understanding of the world around us. Social justice is not a contest of perfection. Itâs a process of growth. That has been completely lost on this community in the past two years.
THAT ONE SECTION MEMBER WHO'S TOO OVEREXPRESSIVE
Ravel's Bolero
In the beginning: Cute solos. Audience is going "wow" and everybody is happy and perky. Can do everything in the world. Tone is amazing.
In the end: The flutist and clarinetist stabbed themselves with their instruments. The audience is rioting. The conductor was poisoned my a viola. The snare drummer disappeared through the back door and demolished the concert hall. The world is destroyed.
Another classical nerd comic found on facebook. My own input:
1. Switch Franck and Hindemith
2. * Messiaen
I AM BEYOND THE SOCIAL DOGMA