Writer

I am a 25 year - old writer and poet. This blog is dedicated to my thoughts and ideas as well as to poetry. I like classics and writing oftens comes too short. Neither my sexual orientation nor my gender should matter to you. This blog is solely about my love of language and producing and engaging with literature and writing and the beauty within.

[thepersonalquotes]

[seizethenight97]

Why did you leave me?

Why did you leave me? Tell me Just give me one reason for it why it had to be done Why did you leave me? Don’t you see how much I need you? How much I am still needing you there is no one who could ever replace you Nobody will ever be able to I miss you so much but I am not even able to tell you Or do you already know? Do you see me when I’m crying? When my tears are running down my cheek? falling on my legs just sitting on the floor Literally wishing you to be here Just to tell you one more time that I love you that I need you That i am so sorry what happened between us I miss you so much I can’t even describe properly Tell me, do you miss me, too whrerever you are right now?

[seizethenight97]

Hardly

I don’t understand Aren’t we close enough? What’s the thing That’s standing between us? I mean…I feel excluded Like a third wheel You can’t make it? You don’t call me But someone else You have to do something? Ah well, without me Sleepovers? Sure but without me Plans? Yeah I may be there But not really in the middle Of what’s happening

Do you have an idea how that feels? To be never truly wanted? To only be wanted by… wait Not even by them They hardly call or text I am the one staying in touch Do they even think of me? One single second? I doubt. But I can’t change anything Cause I’m afraid Afraid to lose people that hardly know me Hardly like me Hardly be with me

As if it wasn’t hard enough For me to survive All that’s happening But all I have to do is continue Be strong enough to fake a smile Be strong enough to look happy Be strong enough to pretend Pretend that you’re a whole When inside you consist Only of a few pieces of what once Was a heart Shattered now Like a broken glass That hardly appreciates someone

[seizethenight97]

Cold

I’m sitting in the cold yet not feeling cold I just feel the darkness around me while it is night outside I can’t see any stars Maybe they don’t shine for me Like they did for you You are here but I can’t see you smile You are here but you don’t speak to me All you do is laying there Fighting And all that I can do is praying Praying to a god I do’nt believe in Praying for a miracle to happen I can’t lose you Not now I still need you Please stay fighting I would give anything To make you feel alive again But in fact I am not able to I can’t How are those two tiny words so powerful? How is that even fair? Who the hell cares about fair? I do Please stay fighting

[seizethenight97]

Dark Paradise

Every time I close my eyes It’s dark around me And shady Full of shadows waiting Waiting for me Full of loss and danger Waiting for me Waiting for me to make a mistake Waiting for me to walk nearer So that they can catch me And hold me And never let me go

And there is no way out Out of it Out of the darkness The moody the dusty The shady Place to be Out of the dark paradise Waiting for me

It’s craving It craves for me It wants me to give up my dreams My wants my wills my fears Why is the dark even to be feared? It’s everywhere Only light can fight it But my light is fading Getting weaker every day

How can I resist the dark When it’s so sweet and easy? When it’s cute and plain? When it fulfills my dreams of being free But I can’t.

[seizethenight97]

Ripper

I miss you More than I thought Was possible But you left And you won’t return Neither now nor later You are gone and And I have to deal with that I have to get along somehow I have to pretent I’m okay When indeed you ripped me apart You took my heart with you When you left me behind Like something used Like someone not worth the time Like you deserve better Cause I am not good enough

You grabbed my heart My feelings, my mind And played with it Up and down Bleeding, hurting, ripping Like Jack the Ripper

Blood flows in my veins My heart is beating But with every heart beat It brings pain Colder as ice Hotter than fire Tearing me apart It tears me apart to feel that Feel alive when it hurts So much

But you don’t care You just went and left me Behind you You moved on Decided to leave someone Who’d always have stayed with you But you know what?

It’s no big deal Cause every pain makes us stronger Every experience wiser And after a couple of seconds It was gone and every breath Felt like the beginning of a new life A life without you A good life.

[seizethenight97]

Movie

Drowning In my own thoughts Surrounded by water But still being thirsty Being loved but still craving for it Never being fully happy with the things we have Always wanting more Wanting better Dying for the better

But at the same time Knowing that tomorrow comes And that it won’t bring us What we need Cause life Is no movie with a Pretty title and a happy ending It’s not always the good who wins It’s not always the bad you transforms Sometimes The bad boy is the good boy And the other way round It’s a world of developing And fiction

Why do we make those films? Why do we watch them? Escaping our own world Hoping for life to happen Like in a movie But it never will There won’t be that guy on the streets Who immediately falls for you There won’t be that shy girl getting prom queen

In real life Things are harder More difficult But easy? Who the hell cares if you feel bad? If life gives you a hundred reasons to cry? If everything falls apart?

In a movie there’s that hero Lifting you up

In real life you collect your shattered heart And continue Cause if life gives you a hundred Reasons to cry Give life a thousand reasons To smile

[seizethenight97]

Centuries

It seems to be centuries since you held me since you touched me since you smiled at me since you were there for me when I needed you when I needed your advice your ears who listened to every little thing I said Important or not Making sense or not your mouth who spoke to me to cheer me up to distract me from my thoughts to tell me everything’s gonna be okay your eyes who saw me struggling crying giving up but being resilient getting up and standing back up But where are you now? There is no shoulder left to lean on now No smile left to touch me and make me smile too no tears to share when I was sad It’s been centuries since you were here to be there for me when I could not be there for myself when I needed you

[seizethenight97]

Goodbye and hello

Sometimes we have to say Goodbye to the people we love and maybe life is just waiting to reward us with a new hello We might not know and might not recognise But in the end we will know Sometimes a goodbye is the best choice to make even though it hurts but some things just won’t change so why living in a fairytale Waiting for something to happen but knowing it will not Why keeping our wounds alive Instead of letting them heal slowly, but constantly Sometimes a new hello is all that we need and all we are looking for and sometimes this new hello could be the old goodbye But sometimes a goodbye has to be forever cause sometimes the people we love won’t return and we will have to face the truth we will have to deal with it we will have to live without them And it won’t matter how hard it is Because sometimes you just keep living

[seizethenight97]

Regret

You’re open to everyone

everyone may touch you

so many people already did

me included. I regret.

I tasted your lips and it made me forget everything

You were so sweet and promised me the world. I couldn’t get enough of you. And this was my death. 

We kissed - you turned away

we laughed - you didn’t even smile anymore

we spent time together - you were busy all of a sudden

What the hell has happened that pulled you away from me?

If you were truthful to both of us, this would have never happened. But it did and now I have to face the demons you summoned inside of me.

Stay away from me, never talk to me again. I won’t die twice because of you.

[seizethenight97]

I am mad.

Yes, yes I am mad at you

You said we are going to do this together

You said you would always be there

and now you chose her.

Yes, that makes me being mad.

I trusted you and you let me fall.

I trusted you and you betrayed me.

Why?

You left me and I’m all on my own

You left me and that breaks me

But guess what?

I’m better on my own.

I’m better without you

No compromising anymore

No adapting to your needs.

I’m done with you.

And don’t you dare judging me.

[seizethenight97]

Lately I talked to a friend about being broken.

When they were younger they liked the idea of someone saving them but then they realized that the broken one doesn't have to be saved by anyone. So I told them that "ok" is within the word "broken". Sometimes you just have to change your perspective. Instead of being broken you can also believe yourself to be ok.

It felt good to have changed their view on that so powerful but negative word.

And always remember: Broken crayons still colour.

[seizethenight97]

We all transform

We all transform

Some in their physical shape

Some in their personality

Some in their mentality

Some in their mindset

We all transform

Some quickly

Some slowly

Some massively

Some a little

We all transform.

[thoughtkick]

“Being alone has a power that very few people can handle.”

— Unknown

[thoughtkick]

“You know it’s love when all you want is that person to be happy, even if you’re not part of their happiness.”

— Julia Roberts

[diesnox97]

You say you don't want to waste my time

Yet you're looking for my affirmation

You say you want to make up for your mistake

Though you didn't do anything wrong

You say you've got a feeling for mental problems

But have no clue what's inside my head

You say so many things

But behave the opposite

So when you say you like me

Is that actually true?

[diesnox97]

What if your whole life was shattered and you had to restart again, all over again?