[soggywarmpockets]

I hope I ruined places for you.

I hope that there are restaurants and coffee shops and stores and bars that you cannot go to anymore because you’re terrified you’ll run into me, or maybe they are just so full of memories of the time we spent there that you can’t enjoy them anymore.

I hope that when you run into people you haven’t seen for years, they ask you how I am doing.

I hope you cringe as you explain that we’re not together anymore. I hope they ask why and pry for details and make you uncomfortable because you either have to lie or admit that you were wrong.

I hope that you are tormented by songs on the radio that remind you of me.

I hope that they make you feel so uneasy that you have to change the station. I hope that you can’t listen to your favorite band anymore without a twinge of guilt because I bought you their entire discography for Christmas. I hope that you feel terrible whenever the band we were supposed to see together comes to town because you never paid me back for the tickets I bought but couldn’t use because you didn’t request off from work even though I told you months in advance.

I hope that when you look around your room, you see the things I left behind; small little traces of me integrated seamlessly into your life that you can never fully erase.

The spare toothbrush on your nightstand. The hoodie that I used to borrow when I got cold at night. The charger that doesn’t fit your phone. Every gift that I bought you. The sock I lost under your bed. The cards and letters that I sent you. 

I hope these things haunt you.

Because I shouldn’t have to be the only one who is devastated.

[just-2am-thoughts-blog]

Now there are movies I can’t watch anymore, songs that I can’t listen to anymore, places I can’t go anymore. Because the things that come with them are things I don’t want to feel anymore.

just-2am-thoughts (via just-2am-thoughts)

[haleyincarnate]

Quote by Holly Black

[imwritingpoems-deactivated20200]

I think you know you’re really over a person when you don’t wish anything bad upon them. You’re not filled with anger anymore, and you don’t want revenge. You just genuinely hope they’re happy.

Even if they did you wrong. Even if they never checked on you.

I really hope the people I’ve loved are getting home safely every night. But I’m not up all night wondering whether they did or not anymore.

[haleyincarnate]

Quote by Jessica Katoff

[weareallwriters]

“That’s the thing,” he said, "I need you in my life.” Silence filled the air between them. Unable to make eye contact, she said: “Need and want are two different things.” He was about to open his mouth and argue but she cut him off, and in a small voice she whispered: "You don’t need me.”

D.O. // You were whole before me and you will be whole after me (via weareallwriters)

[we-were-inevitably-inlove-deact]

I finally got over it. I got over you and the bullshit. The run-around and the hot and cold emotions. The “I didn’t mean for it to happen” sex, and the accidental “I love you’s”. I got over being your second choice - your backup plan.     So I finally told you:   Trying to be friends with you is making me miserable. Constantly trying to make sure you’re okay and reaching out to see if you were even alive was exhausting. I finally got done trying. I stopped trying to be someone to you because, in all honesty, you didn’t fucking deserve it.   You didn’t deserve my love, my kisses, my time, my feelings, my thoughts, my sex, my heart, my secrets…. any of it. I am too pure, too kind, to have you repeatedly try to tear me down and make me cold. You had a queen and you reshuffled your deck and ended up with a joker… and you can’t take responsibility for that. Somehow it was always my fault: I was the one in the wrong for caring.    So I am done. I am done trying to prove to you that I am worthy of being loved and I was the best you ever had. I am done throwing myself and my feelings at you for you to just look in the other direction. I am done being your 2a.m call when you need to feel something. I am done with you.    I hate you. I have never hated anyone, but I hate you. With every fiber, every molecule, and every atom in my being. I am done.

(via we-were-inevitably-inlove)

[myxandme-blog]

[conscious-love]

Post-Affair: How to Trust Them Again (Privacy vs. Transparency)

Yes, both you and your partner are entitled to your privacy. Yes, in a healthy relationship, there needs to be trust, and there’s no need to look through each other’s phones or question their whereabouts at all times.

However, they cheated. They cheated, and you chose to stay because you believe the relationship can be salvaged. If you believe that you and your partner can work this out, and they’re actively working toward regaining your trust, then yes, it can be done.

In order to gain back your trust, they have to give up their privacy. I’d say for at least six months. It’s post-affair protocol. They can’t just expect you to get over it and trust them. If they’re serious about being with you and moving on from this, they have to suck it up and accept that what they did was a betrayal to you, and they lost the right to your blind trust. Now you need to trust them based on evidence. They can apologize all they want, but unless their behaviour changes, they’re not to be trusted. They gave up the right to privacy and now it’s time to be transparent.

[sheispoetrying]

Red pours hot out of my body Fuming anger and pride not Through gritted teeth or tired wrists But out of two ears, smoking my mind With the empty fog of old lies I don’t care about you anymore Nor do I fear the stories you tell And I especially don’t resent her Sweetly attached at your waist Falling blindly into the pit of your lust My mind thinks nothing of your soul Ever since you trashed the garden I showed you last summer My love for growth defines me And you do not Yet still, I cannot help but writhe and tighten When forcibly facing this new reality And worst of all I’m beginning to worry I will never Learn to unclench these fists you made

(a.e.) // lingering anger (via i-am-poetrying)

[conscious-love]

Counter thoughts of them with thoughts of You. Invest in yourself. Take the love you have for them and give it to your loved ones, your passions, and most importantly — to yourself.

Moving On

[purplebuddhaquotes]

When feeling overwhelmed by a faraway goal, repeat the following: I have it within me right now to get me to where I want to be later.

Karen Salmansohn (via purplebuddhaquotes)

[drunk-on-writing]

i can’t remember the last time we spoke but i still remember the little things like the way your eyes sparkled in the sunlight or feel of your hair against my fingers i still remember the sound of your laugh and the way you sang i still remember your birthday (do you remember mine?) even though now it’s just an empty square on my calendar  and i can’t remember the last time we spoke but i still get the urge to call you or text you tell you that i’m wishing you well  even though i know all i’ll get in return is more radio silence even though i hadn’t heard from you on my own birthday sometimes i wish i could forget the hours spent wasting time until midnight to be the first person to tell you i wish i could forget the way your face would light up as i showered you with gifts i wish i could forget the way it made me feel to know i made you feel so loved and so happy i wish i could forget but i still remember i don’t think i know how to forget (you made it seem so easy)

(cc, 2018)

[bebepreferee]

“Little do you know the strong girl in light is the one crying at night?“

— @xmea

[unlovableangel-blog]

falling for you was my mistake.

[myxandme-blog]

[artyprose-deactivated20200707]

The lightning vibrated in his face, mixing his skin tone with purple and silver. His right hand is holding a beer while he’s looking intently outside, with bloodshot eyes and a broken heart. He gulped the remaining alcohol in one shot. And then he saw me. The room is still the same. The painting that we both love is still hanging beside the window, our photos are still on the bookshelf showing how happy we are traveling together, our cat is watching me looking at him. And my heart if only it can be visible, is melting knowing something is off. He never drinks alcohol. “Let’s break up” The words echoed with the thunder giving light to the corner of our space. The silence after the words boomed inside my head left me standing still. I am blaming myself instantly, I am trying to think rationally but my voice is begging. “We can make this work” I said in the most soothing way; being brave without knowing the rain is already in my eyes. “I want to believe that” he said cutting the remaining pieces of my heart into tiny more pieces and there’s no more way of fixing them back. Not when I I love him so much. And now he no longer loves me back.

⠀𝒶𝓇𝓉𝓎𝓅𝓇𝑜𝓈𝑒 • this is how it ends (via artyprose)