I thought I’d find and post the actual diagram she made from the video The Ring, the Great Dark and Proximity to God. (All of what is stated in this post is what she says in her YouTube video).
In this post, it will mainly focus on the ring, divine theatre, the veil and the hole.
(The concept she spoke about is extremely interesting to me. It’s a really beautiful take on how she specifically sees the world).
Hayden states that many people will try to seek out the ring — a portal of elevation and enlightenment — knowingly, unknowingly. Some encounter it and not know what it is, and some may never encounter it.
When the ring is activated through a full range of frequencies, such as sound, the full hertz scale, once it has reached the complete range of frequencies, it creates the pull. Hayden states that it is the pull of your soul. It transcends music and it becomes an emotional experience, thus having an out-of-body experience.
Hayden goes onto to mention the music that are rings for her are songs such as Cosmic Love by Florence + The Machine, Grand Loves by Purity Ring, The Culling by Chelsea Wolfe and Pedestal by Vera Blue. Once you've reached the full activation — or climax or the crest — you start to experience "the sigh". It feels like your body is sighing once you've reached the peak, it is almost as though you've been climbing this great wave. This wave goes into the divine theatre
The divine theater is where God resides. It is enlightened state mind, a feeling of euphoria/ecstasy. This is not felt all the time. there is a veil within the divine theatre, and behind that veil is where God resides; this can also be known as the currency of the realm. Many people will have rings in their lives. A lot of people achieve this through the use of drugs, sex, food and other mechanisms (?) are great ways to experience this. The God that Hayden is discussing is not one of Christianity/mysticism (although this can differ for others).
In Hayden's experience, it is a higher calling — it is not a being nor is it tangible. It feels beyond oneself. It's a connection to something greater than oneself, becoming one with its' one's surroundings. It encompasses you and holds you. It's the euphoria and ecstasy from being spiritually enlightened. That is what Hayden considers to be the divine theater and the proximity to God.
There is a veil because there needs to be a dividing factor between you and God. Hayden states that it's same as Eve eating the apple from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. You never want to be one with God; the proximity to god is desirable. She says "The desire is to ultimately touch the veil and be flesh with god. Tearing through the veil and becoming one with God is an unknown and discouraged experience" She says that being one with God is like Cate Blanchett and the end of Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, where she gets the skull, has the knowledge, understands, and then floats away into bits of light.
Hayden says that humans are not meant to be God; we're just meant to be flesh with him. She thinks it's a beautiful experience and she craves it often. She has experienced it through mainly music —however, also with drugs, such as psychedelics, acid, shrooms and a bit too much ketamine. Alongside sedatives, through slowing her heart rate down, she says with drugs that are "downers" it is less of a pull and more of slow slide.
Hayden states that she fears entering the divine theater, whereas others are more willing and enticed to enter the divine theater. She says that the divine theater is an extremely overwhelming experience, although it does feel good for her. She feels a sense of shame. She doesn't exactly know why, but something nonetheless makes her feel overwhelmed.
The overwhelming feeling Hayden experiences is not a pleasant, she has a mix of emotions whilst she is in the divine theater. As she feels overwhelming euphoria, which is why she doesn't take any sort of drugs that are "uppers" such as molly. That sort of ecstasy and euphoria is a little bit tooo indulgent for her. Hayden says the divine theater is very beautiful, yet the proximity to god is terrifying. She says "you know, when fear of god is just as important as loving him" it is a fear; it's the dichotomy of proximity to god — fear and love.
BRIEF MENTION OF THE GREAT DARK:
Hayden mentions that being in divine theater all the time would ultimately make someone lose touch with reality. It would also be harder to communicate with people who live in the great dark — the general state of confusion and anticipation, anxiety of the future. This is a healthy state; you need to be grounded. she notes that the great dark is not as bad as it sounds. The majority of our lives are meant to be within the great dark, as we all need to function. It isn't realistic to be in the divine theater all the time.
Hayden says that she loves to go to the hole. she jokes with her friends says "oh, winter's coming, I'm going to throw blankets over the windows and go into the hole. you know, I'm in my hole" She describes the hole as being in the place of darkness and despair — wallowing, self-pity, misery all of those things. She says "I think it's fine to go into from time to time, as long as you are not staying there" she continues on to say "one venture into the hole but will enter a perpetual sinking, if one neglects to exit in time. They will enter the maze and become stuck forever"
When you enter the hole, you are basically entering a period and a point of darkness — overwhelming darkness — which is fine. But when you are in it, you will enter a state of perpetual sinking, where you go deeper and deeper. You can never remain where you are; darkness is inviting and it will continue to pull you down. Hayden then says that there's a lot to be found in the hole. There's inspiration, there's answers to the dark questions about yourself, such as: What are you afraid of? Why are you afraid of it? Hayden goes on to mention that it is important that you know about yourself. It's an important place to go every now and then.
She says "i don't think you should invite people into your pity party if you are the one throwing it, especially If it's a conscious decision that you make to go into a dark place" she states that she chooses to go into this dark place often, because she enjoys it, and she thinks the dark places are comforting sometimes — to be in a nest. Everyone has that place they go in their head where they love to feel bad and sometimes you want to feel bad but life isn't meant to be good all the time. Sometimes you need to feel bad. grieving, depression, and all these places are natural things. They are okay to be in; you just can't stay there forever.
You have to be conscious of that, which is why she says that you'll enter perpetual sinking. You can be there, but you can't be there forever because eventually you will sink into something she calls the maze
The maze is a place of wandering, of extreme confusion, unreality, detachment from reality. It is not a good place to be. She doesn't see people leaving the maze. It's a place of delusion. Hayden's states that "I've known people in my life, close to me, who have been lost, to what to what i described as the maze — people who are no longer in touch with reality, and it's terrifying. It's hard for them and it's hard for everyone around them. It's very sad, and it's not a place that you want to be. It's not a place that i wanna go ever"
Which why she has to keep herself in check whenever she has a pity party and wallows in depression and all the negative aspects of the psyche. You have to be careful because you don't want to dip into something you can't come back from. Hayden states "Some people it's voluntary and some people it's involuntary, you know. Some people have an obsession with the dark that takes them down there. Some people, through mental illness it's beyond their control, sink into place that's terrifying and they can't get out of. It's just not a good place, but it exists."
Hayden Silas Anhedönia, from her video on YouTube called The Ring, the Great Dark, and the Proximity to God. (14 Nov 2023)
