Stages of breaking a feminist
This stage usually happens at a feminist rally, or a pride parade. You’ll be able to see the best candidates. They’ll usually have revealing clothes on, be holding up a sign with some empowering slogan on it.
Talk to her, be respectful, pretend to be on her side. Invite her over for coffee, or pretend you have a DIY job to do. She’ll be thrilled that you don’t think women are inherently weak.
Feminists have some trust issues when it comes to men, so this requires a lot of work. Read up on feminist theory, follow her feminist tumblr blog (they all have one), so you can engage in discussions with her. Make her believe that you are one of the good men.
You can choose whether or not to pursue a relationship at the end of this stage, and I recommend you do. It makes the process easier. Woo her. Be gentle. Treat her like a delicate princess, but also a strong warrior. She’ll fall head over heels.
Stage 3 : Subtle indoctrination
Now she’s your girlfriend, she’ll implicitly trust you. You can take her on dates to cafes, and play video games with her at home. Make sure to play with other boys. When they make sexist comments, argue at first, but over time, slowly become less angry. Go from an angry telling off, to an annoyed voice, to an eyeroll, to just laughing awkwardly.
Eventually she’ll get used to it, and she’ll just laugh along with you. When you have sex for the first time, be gentle. But again, change slowly. By the time you move onto the next phase, you should have slowly become rough in bed. Tell her it’s all kink, and give her aftercare afterward.
This is where you start to mess with her mind. Hopefully you’re living together by now. Start to subtly change where furniture is, so she’ll bang into it more often. Coo and kiss her bruises better. Mess with small things, so that they’re almost broken, so that when she uses them she breaks them. Tell her you’re not mad, but have a disappointed look on your face.
Hide her clothes and return them randomly. Secretly turn her morning alarms off so she’s late for work. Mess with her tumblr feed so it shows porn, hopefully your kinks. Her brain will slowly learn to depend on you, as you tell her she’s being silly and paranoid. Always make sure to comfort her though, tell her it’s okay to be a bit clumsy, that you love her either way.
By this point, messing with her alarms may have already fired her, and if so, make sure to let her know you’ll pay for everything. That she can just pick up more chores around the house in return. She’ll be so grateful that you’re understanding.
Tell her she can’t see friends, make her believe that her friends are judging her for her recent ‘mistakes’. That her family just want to control her, and she should be an independent adult and stay with you, far away from them.
At the beginning of this stage, marry her. Give her a beautiful wedding, so romantic, the marriage of her dreams. Be loving on the wedding night. Take her to a resort for the honeymoon. Lavish her with love and gifts. Make her reliant and needy for you.
When you get home, knock her up. Convince her to go off birth control, or poke holes in condoms. Act ecstatic and comforting when she tells you the news. Say you’ll provide for her and the baby.
She’ll soon be fully swollen with babies. Not even thinking about getting a job. Cooking and cleaning the house. Desperate for your affection and approval.
Your cock will be her life. And she’ll worship it, knowing it’s the cock that knocked her up. The cock that took her from being a stressed feminist, to a happy ditzy housewife.
