Passed My Expiration Date

Just some idiot with a big ol scoop of the big sad.

[dontaskidontknow]

[memes-for-souls-deactivated2023]

[tyjrose]

[dankmemeuniversity]

[only-cat-memes]

Your daily dose of cat memes

[trupowieszcz-moved-deactivated2]

r/scrungycats is fucking amazing

[t3sticles]

“Well what about straight pri-“

[youmatterlifeline]

[anxietyproblem]

[advice-animal]

Paywalls.

[sassafranski]

that awkward moment between birth and death

[memeclassheroes]

[bogleech]

I like this pathfinder race of space slime people who want to turn everyone into more space slime people, like a cult, and how it's scarier BECAUSE there's no trick or scam or secret agenda, you just cave because they're that nice for real.

[wilwheaton]

bUt HuNtEr bIdEnS LaPtOp!

[honeytuesday]

maybe i'm just a portrait of all the people i've loved and nothing else tastes so bittersweet. a little dash of my ex-best friend in the way i walk and laugh. my scarf tied in a double knot for that beautiful stranger at the bus stop. a whisper of my mother and the sigh of a lover in the way i braid my hair. pockets full of fire and infinite regret like my dad or his dad or his dad. the tilt of my jaw, the curve of my smile, everything, everything is someone else. when they're all gone, my own reflection will be the biggest ghost i have.

[stainlessteelwaterbottle]

youre telling me a ham fisted this metaphor??

[victoriankeysmash]

[shadowthehedgehogmovie]

[valtsv]

it would be fun if an angel and a vampire were friends i think

[valtsv]

vampire: ugh, you mortals simply can't comprehend the timescale i live on. i've watched your empires rise and fall, your cities crumble to dust. i find your short little lives amusing at best. i -

angel: HI, I HAVE BEEN ALIVE SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME AND I NOTICED YOU ARE ALSO SOMEWHAT OLD?

vampire: ...sure. hey what was the dawn of time like?

angel: PRETTY BORING ACTUALLY. NOTHING ELSE EXISTED YET.

vampire: oh, man, i feel you. i slept through, like, the entire 14th century it was so boring. everyone was dying of plague and shit anyway so i didn't miss much.

[valtsv]

vampire: hey i am outside your apartment

angel: YOU'VE JUST BEEN STANDING THERE? FOR HOW LONG?

vampire: uhhhhhhh a mere speck in comparison to our immortal lives so don't worry about it honestly. i need you to invite me in though.

angel: OF COURSE, I'M SO SORRY. PLEASE COME IN.

vampire: *steps over the threshold and immediately starts hissing and coughing like a cat with a bad hairball*

angel: OH, I'M SO SORRY. MY APARTMENT IS CONSIDERED HOLY GROUND BECAUSE I LIVE IN IT. I SHOULD HAVE WARNED YOU.

vampire: *coughing* it's fine. do you - *cough* *wheeze* what are your thoughts on chinese? i know a great place just a couple of blocks from here

[valtsv]

everyone replying to this with "and they were lovers"? target audience