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So I got tired of having so many side-blogs, and I'm closing and deleting some of them

I have stuff here so I'm not gonna delete this account but I'm not posting here anymore, if you like me or my stuff, go follow me at @shiorikinnie

ernest-pamphilow

reasons for Severus Snape’s attitude toward Harry

[as i see it == subjective]

> he avoids closeness with people in general. not just with Harry, with anyone. <jk -- ... never became friends, since Severus never had them>

he dislikes Gryffindor as a phenomenon. he dislikes childish rudeness, disrespect, noise, chaos. and these particular kids also stole ingredients [not Harry, but Snapes assumptionswerent unreasonable], didn’t listen in class, behaved as if he was obliged to tolerate them simply by default.

he has a very low tolerance for any kind of intrusion, and here it’s an entire house that lives by the principle of <innocent until proven guilty;).>

teaching children is not his strong point, but it was never his choice.

[from a personal perspective, he has, in principle, encountered the same problems that any chemistry teacher faces.

and in fact, he would be a very good university teacher, but they don't have universities. so..]

> Harry is a visual and behavioral [in some aspects] copy of James. and what matters here is that James, for Sev, began at 11 and ended at 18. [so he literally sees not the father-son copy, but the sane face of the same age]

this is a person who coincided with the most vulnerable period of his life. so Harry is a walking trigger. on top of that, he’s James’s son. and everything repeats itself: the same house, the same role on the team, the same endless wandering around the castle, the same blind affection from everyone around him. and on top of all that, he has to somehow accept the necessity of protecting “little James.”

psychologically, this is hell.

[and regarding attention. the idea that Severus was jealous of attention, imo, is nonsense. if you hate someone and know what a piece of shit they are, you’re just going to be annoyed that everyone around worships them, loves them, admires them. Severus never had any desire to be the center of attention. yes, he wanted recognition, but… he did not crave the spotlight, nor did he enjoy it]

> Harry has Lily’s eyes. and this works on several levels at once.

first, it is constant grief for a person he loved. and it is raw sorrowful and painful.

second, it is a constant reminder that he is responsible for this. not “partly” “indirectly, by affiliation and inaction” but by being The rootcause. it is a mistake that cannot be rewritten, cannot be undone, cannot be fully atoned for. he will live with it forever. hence the guilt, the self-loathing, the self-punishment. [otherwise the old man Albus simply wouldn’t have been able to manipulate him so effectively]

and he is not Peter Pettigrew. he will not play the victim, press for pity, or look for excuses.

he is not in such despair, and not in such a position, that he would confess that he is a Death Eater and that the Potters died because of him. he does not want to die, does not want Azkaban, does not want persecution.... like any normal person.

but at the same time, he has a heart and a conscience, and he is incapable of pretending to be a pleasant, kind, socially comfortable person...

physically, yes, he could play that role.

but it is not in his nature. and more importantly, the more people consider him good, the stronger the dissonance with how they would treat him if they knew the truth. and the truth, by his internal logic, will be discovered sooner or later.

and the very idea that this boy might trust him, and then find out who it was because of whom he has no parents, would be simply unbearable for Sev.

if he is suspected from the start, it is easier. more honest. safer for everyone involved.

// this is exactly why this dynamic does not apply to Draco.

he knows that Sev is a Death Eater.

the Malfoys are not good people, and he treats them accordingly: with gratitude, with a certain degree of mutual respect, no more and no less.

plus, he feels sorry for Draco. because if for Sev the path of a Death Eater is his choice, his mistake, and his responsibility, then Draco’s mind has been washed from the very beginning. he effectively has no choice, and he is dragged into all of this as a child.//

*don't see people mentioning this part like at all:

> THE DARK LORD

and this is where it gets most interesting. the thing about Severus is that he is, in fact, a genius. yes, [slightly Mary Sue, but, thank Merlin, not in the dumb sense of “he’s the best at everything,” but in a very specific and strategically crucial way. he ended up in exactly the position where his skills are not just useful, but critical]

the fact that he is a brilliant potioneer is great, yes, convenient, practical, etc etc.... but his truly frightening and valuable ability is Legilimency. he is one of the strongest Legilimens of his time.

now Voldemort. like any paranoid tyrant, he trusts no one. he constantly checks his allies, and everyone around him, for truthfulness. Legilimency for him is almost a baseline household tool.

and the catch is that Severus cannot simply “close his mind.” because a closed mind, to Voldemort, is already suspicious. the very idea that you are hiding something is already deadly dangerous.

so Severus is forced to give Voldemort access to his mind. he can neither do fully, nor chaotically. but by directing his thoughts so that Voldemort sees exactly what he is meant to believe. hatred toward Potter in this context is the perfect strategy. it is logical, consistent, emotionally plausible.

boy is James’s son. the enemy of his master. an irritating Gryffindor brat. everything fits.

even the fact that he constantly tries to save Harry is already an inconvenient aspect that has to be masked and rationalized and redirected from Voldy.

it would be easier to shut down his mind. but he cannot afford even a hint of a double bottom.

he HaS to be readable. predictable. absolutely faithful to his core.

[let’s put it this way:

there’s a magician hiding a rabbit in a hat. the audience sees the rabbit > sees the hat > doesn’t see the rabbit inside. they know it has something to do with the hat, but they can’t figure out how it works. they do know for sure that the rabbit existed. and that somewhere, they were tricked.

in the case of snape: he walks in with the rabbit in his hands and walks out with the rabbit in his hands. the hat doesn’t exist. the only thing he can do /and will do/ is make sure no one even pays slightest attention to the rabbit]

and in that sense, his attitude toward Harry is not only personal trauma + inability to let go, but also a perfectly calibrated survival strategy. for both of them and for everyone else

sockfunky

projecting my trauma onto fictional characters /j

(unimportant edit under cut)

ena333333

genderbend

hisbutler-problematic

i love how i’ll be hanging out and my brain will just be like “uwu sebaciel rape roleplay as rape recovery” and NOTHING ELSE like my guy. give me something to work with if you’re gonna be that insistent

crying ciel. seb like tf is wrong with u

ciel has a ptsd episode mid sex and seb is like. this is SUCH a mood killer ngl. literally what is the problem you literally have all the power here

seb probably likes when ciel cries. seems like the kind of guy. but like. sexy tears not ptsd episode tears

anyway what if ciel completely consented but he wanted seb to ignore his protests bc he wants to “get used to” being touched that way

literally the WORST attempt at exposure therapy

not to say something absolutely unhinged but sebaciel cnc in which they play up seb being a demon and all ooooh i’ll teach you ~pleasure~ bc they’re both fucked up and find it sexy that seb is a demon. they sometimes do fun sexy cnc the other way around for like. ohhh the ~dubcon of it all~ that seb has to listen to ciel’s orders whether he wants to or not (he does)

sebaciel + somnophilia

me: [hanging out] my brain: ciel safewording a lot/often just to prove to himself that he can and that sebastian will stop

testing the boundaries of trust

shigayokagayama

mob psycho is the greatest show ever made because reigen being cancelled on twitter is one of the most important moments for his character as well as one of the most emotionally heavy episodes of the show but him being trapped in alone in a purgatory dimension slowly starving to death is treated as a gag and never mentioned again

zimowahistoria

sebastian treating ciel the way gomez treats morticia

thedisasterbi

happy valentines day

milkoosagi

a century later, he still remembers his face

rrightthoughtts

piximimi

I don’t think I posted this ReiMob reincarnation AU from a while ago but I remembered it and I think I cooked with this

neolavender

Reigen's Insecurities and Defense Mechanism in Relationships: The Case for Mobreimob

So, I stumbled upon this tweet on Twitter (I refuse to call it X) just now.

It's no secret Reigen has a side he's hiding that he's ashamed/embarrassed to share, but I couldn't think of what exactly it is. Until this question, that is.

Because, in real life, even the smallest thing can be something you're not willing to tell others due to context and culture (ie. liking yaoi; having pre-marital sex in a society that criminalizes it; heck, stanning BTS amongst a group of friends who are all BTS antis (lol); etc.)

As for Reigen, I believe his shame is mostly tied to his dream. He wanted to be "someone", but all he is now is a scammer who tricks gullible people and underpays his employees.

When he first meets a potential romantic partner, he can't have possibly confessed all his sins right away. He probably oversells himself out of habit and, later down the road, finds it hard to expose his more vulnerable sides because his initial oversells are lies.

He tells Mob to be himself when Mob is about to confess to Tsubomi, but Reigen admits to Serizawa that, if it were him, he couldn't have used his own advice because his real self isn't likable. He wouldn't "be himself". He'd "try to be slick".

Or, in the manga:

That's why I think Reigen is the type of person who has no difficulty attracting potential romantic partners. He can get anyone he wants and, on the surface level, everything will be great in the early stages of the relationship. But,

They'd always leave once they realized his lies and stopped seeing him through a rose-tinted glass;

Reigen, after learning this pattern, would push potential romantic partners away before anything even started;

Even if this person is still interested in having a relationship with him, it's very likely that Reigen would self-sabotage the relationship and find ways to end it. If he was still unable to solve his insecurities at this stage, he'd always end up internally questioning the other person: "Is this really okay?" "Is this really what you want?" "Are you really okay with me?"

Considering all these, the perfect partner for Reigen would be someone who accepts him despite knowing all his bad sides. But, most importantly, they should be someone Reigen is willing to be honest with, who encourages him to accept himself and helps him become a better person.

Someone like that already exists in the Mob Psycho 100 universe.

Mob knows all along that Reigen is lying. Despite this, he still accepts Reigen.

Mob is also the only person other than Tome who Reigen confesses his lies to (in the Reigen manga spin-off). Reigen is never honest about his real self with anyone else except these two.

By having Reigen console Mob about an internal conflict he himself is dealing with, Mob also indirectly encourages Reigen to accept his real self (this is a similar technique used in Greta Gerwig's Barbie when Barbie tells Ken that it's okay to be ordinary. Barbie's consolation of Ken prompts her to realize that she herself is also enough)

And lastly, Mob indirectly encourages Reigen to be a better version of himself. The separation arc prompts Reigen to humble himself and appreciates Mob a lot more. The confession arc prompts Reigen to be more honest. And Mob apparently indirectly prompts Reigen to work out more, too.

Okay, so we've established that Mob is the perfect partner for Reigen. But is Reigen the perfect partner for Mob? Because a relationship is a two-way street, and we can't have one party be happy while the other miserable.

What's interesting about this question... is that both Mob and Reigen mainly look for and need the same thing from a partner: someone who provides external validation AND inspires internal validation (self-acceptance).

In the case of Mob, the former is really the main reason why he "falls" for Tsubomi in the first place. She doesn't see him any differently, even with his powers. So, what about Reigen?

Okay, so he doesn't treat Mob any differ—wait.

So, Mob has actually pondered about this. About how Reigen actually sees him. Mob isn't dumb. He and Shigeo knew all along that Reigen is actually powerless. That he lies and uses Mob for his own benefit.

But are all these true, or are they simply his own assumptions?

They used to be true, but not anymore.

And whilst Tsubomi is able to give Mob external validation (when they were both kids), she doesn't inspire internal validation like Reigen does. This doesn't even include the ways in which Reigen influences Mob to be better. Because I don't think I need to bring any evidence to prove that had Mob not met Reigen, he'd be Mogami 2.0 or claw!Serizawa 2.0.

So what does this all mean?

The TLDR is that considering Reigen's insecurities and defense mechanism in relationships, I do think that Mob is the perfect partner for him all along, but Reigen is only the perfect partner for Mob post-confession arc—once he can be honest with Mob and himself, and stops relying on Mob at all.

Because only then that Mob and Reigen can exist without distorting each other.