Fictional Geographies @dorminjake - Tumblr Blog

And in these next 50 years you will eat so many delicious meals, laugh so many times with so many people you love, shout and scream and sing and cry and smile so hard your face hurts. And you will see such beautiful sunsets and feel fresh cold air on your face and feel warm and safe wrapped up in your favourite winter coat.

wizard-council-bureaucrat

I wrap this blessing around you like a shroud, so that no ill can find you, and every warmth is held close

dorminjake

This is what I mean when I say “bless you” after someone sneezes

kasperl-ruprecht

boatgrave-deactivated20250901

mysteryteacup

*Scrolls past*

*reluctant sigh*

*scrolls back up*

*rebogs*

benmce-art

Autumn’s Waning

wearemercs

Cleric by Liu Ming

mobydyke

one thing about me is that I'm looking stuff up. you mentioned something and I don't know it? I am pulling out my phone and googling that shit. an actor? theoretical physics? a world leader? a vocabulary word? I am on the wikipedia page as we speak

#same #same same #same same same #me also

fincherly

Fuck yeah they gave it a mech

modmad

get in the robot Shiitake

dorminjake

MECHAMUSH

lizardsfromspace

Imagine washing up on Dinotopia and getting a talk saying "unfortunately, you can't escape this island! You'll never go home or see your loved ones ever again" & then while you're crying they say "I'm sorry, you'll just have to live on the island of dinosaur communism for the rest of your life" and you look up through your bleary eyes and go. Wait what

theforcegifs

The Mandalorian / Star Wars Celebration 2019

lemeute

God is behind everything, but everything hides God. Things are black; creatures are opaque. To love a being is to render it transparent.

Victor Hugo’s draft of Les Miserables.

marionbulot

Sorry Anubis, seems like your Osiris is broken.

#dang gorgeous art

glumshoe

I made some ASMR ambient atmosphere mixes for your highly specific needs

1.) Haunted campout in a northern forest where strange beasts lurk in the distance and whispers of the unquiet dead keep you awake through the long dark night 2.) The Joker is probably getting ready to murder you horribly in an abandoned warehouse 3.) Killer Croc hunts you through the Gotham sewers, occasionally eating corpses 4.) Man has pleasant vanilla sex with a monster in cheap motel bed 5.) You’re the last gunslinger marching across a dreary wasteland after the world has moved on, pursuing the man in black across the desert while the machines of the old world still hum their death throes

glumshoe

6.) woman flees across frozen tundra from evil mechanical whales from another dimension 7.) frightend young boy is chased through forest by the Wild Hunt and their eldritch hounds

glumshoe

8.) Baba Yaga has kidnapped you and prepares to cannibalize you as part of a hearty and well-balanced meal 9.) Drinking a stolen soda at the bottom of the Mariana Trench and burping from the highly-pressurized gas 10.) mute woman has quiet sexy encounter with an amphibious monster in an aquarium 11.) n00b necromancer digs up bones from a church graveyard for the first time, crying with guild and anxiety as angry spirits murmur in anger at her trespassing

glumshoe

12.) Hiding scared and alone in the dark as the fabric of reality is unwoven by interdimensional forces beyond our understanding, and the world as we know it comes to a dark and brutal end 13.) Amateur cryptid-hunter hikes alone through woods on a breezy summer’s day, searching for evidence of the paranormal and oblivious to danger 14.) lesbian lumberjack chops down tree in the early morning while thinking dreamily about her new wife

glumshoe

15.) Waiting on a cliff over the Irish sea, impatiently awaiting the return of your beloved gay selkie bride 16.) Sitting in the woods, minding your own business, when some Elf LARPers walk by 17.) Typing angry messages on a Justice League fan forum about why Batman is not overrated, while sitting alone in the Batcave 18.) Sleeping in on a rainy day while a cat purrs on your chest and someone makes you breakfast and tea 19.) Drifting in and out of sleep on a crisp April night in the woods 20.) Chilling on a riverbank under the summer sun 21.) Standing on the Innsmouth shoreline contemplating your inevitable transformation into a fishperson and your descent beneath the waves; you can hear your ancestors calling you

wehavekookies

She has seen me through dark waters. Soon she will see me unobscured.

prokopetz

Concept: financially struggling biology student discovers that the reason her monthly data bill is so high is because an ant colony in her basement has been stealing her wi-fi.

funnyfoxes55

@caffeinewitchcraft

caffeinewitchcraft

“I’m not angry,” she says from the top of the basement stairs. “Just disappointed.”

Below, a million hard exoskeletons glitter in the light streaming through the open door. The floor is completely covered in them, the hard-packed dirt rounded and molded into their home.

With a sigh, she starts down the stairs. “Don’t you swarm at me. I give you food, I give you shelter and this, this is the repayment I get! Where’s the Queen?”

There’s the sound of insects rushing past each other and a black mound begins to form. It grows higher and higher, moving slowly towards the bottom step, until it’s at her waist. Slowly, the top layer of workers peels back to reveal the Queen in all her glory.

The Queen is easily the length of her hand, glittering and gorgeous in the faint light. She had been the one to make the Queen last semester as part of her final project. Her professor had given her an A on the condition that she destroy the Queen and her genetically enhanced children, but, instead, she’d taken them home.

“Look at this,” she says, thrusting her bill in front of the Queen’s tiny head. “I can’t afford this! I don’t–where did you all even get computers?”

The ants surge guiltily, producing a mac that looks very, very familiar.

“You stole my ex’s laptop.” It’s not a question. “That’s–alright, that’s pretty funny. I’m not going to take it away, relax, but you all need to figure out how to pay for this, okay? I can’t feed you and entertain you on my stipend, okay?”

The Queen regally nods. There’s a shift in the air as she communicates with the others and another mound of ants forms and pushes forward. This one opens to reveal a plastic bag filled with dirt-covered jewelry and a handful of…ancient coins?

She takes the bag, staring blankly at it. “Okay…I’m not going to ask. I don’t want to know. I’ll invest in better internet and pretend that you guys aren’t about two seconds from opening a chop shop or crime ring or whatever in my basement.”

The ants wave agreeably.

She turns to go and pauses halfway up. “I have to ask. What do you guys even need internet for?”

The mac flickers on to show Jessica Jones paused halfway through episode six.

“Fair enough,” she says and goes to google local pawn shops that don’t ask too many questions