This is a Portal x Reader blog! This blog is basically just for fun and to hopefully regain writing motivation and I love all these stupid little guys so here we are. The guy who runs this blog is nonbinary transmasc and has ADHD. So just throwing that out there before everything else. ANYWAYS YEAH HERE WE GO
~What to know~
Please be 16+, that's all I ask
Please be patient with me. This blog is for fun and as a hobby to branch off from the stresses of life with these funny little stupid guys. So if you spam me about why your request wasn't chosen, it's probably because i'm busy or I simply don't want to do it.
I'll only do requests that interest me. So if you're like my 100th Wheatley request, high chance i won't pick it unless it interests me
I don't do flat out smut, take that back to Ao3
While I do romantic and platonic requests, I don't do familial stuff. Found family is cool, but if it's like "Glados if she was my mom" that kinda squicks me out maaan
I don't do proship shit, take that shit to the incinerator
Please be specific whether you want a list of headcanons or want a little oneshot
The more obscure the character, the bigger likelihood you'll be picked. Like if you're saying that you want to kiss Virgil then you have a better chance of someone who wants to kiss Wheatley (You can still request Wheatley btw, just make it fun)
~Stuff I will do~
Any canon robots
Any canon humans
Characters from mods (MEL, Aperture Tag, Revolutions, ETC)
Fan Shows (Meet the Cores, The Underground)
Any sorta reader, just specify how they present or else i'll just default to GN
I can do poly relationships if you'd like (Like Glados x Reader x Chell)
If we're doing robots, tell me how you want them to be whether it's their canon designs, androids or humans. If not I will default to their canon designs, so don't come at me if it ends with you kissing some flat face
You can request multiple characters if it's a headcanons list like "The corrupted cores with their GN!S/O" and I will make headcanons for all of em
AUS and stuff
ANYWAYS UH- keep kissing some flat faces my guys, and have fun
Can I get an Adventure core x runaway reader trying to escape the facility or find a place where they can be left alone to chill?
Kinda like an old aperture where they can set up a home base to return to
I wana kiss the cowboy orb :]
OH ANON OHHHH ANON WE ARE ONE IN THE SAME ANON SHAKES YOUR HAND SHAKES YOUR HAND i love the cowboy orb too man i love him so much. Despite this not being specified, i'm making this a fic because I can
Adventure Core x Runaway Reader
The lower older levels of the facility were a labyrinth of old memories and dead ends. You could hear the creaks of metal beams bouncing off the cave walls of the salt mine, it was like with every heavy step you risked it collapsing in on itself. Thankfully you found yourself in one of the old offices, the rooms being filled with old typewriters on desks and others holding tables for hypothetical meetings. The wallpaper was ripping, and what remained of the lights were flickering.
You were grasping your portal gun, the end of it holding a new little friend that got you into this mess.
"Take a left right here, beautiful! My gut is telling me this'll lead us outta here" Rick says with unwarranted confidence considering you guys have been lost for what seemed like an hour of no progress.
You did as the sphere said, and took a left down a short hall and it leading to a closed wooden door. Probably the only thing made out of wood in the whole facility. "I'll kick it down for ya just steer me closer to it!"
"Alright, alright," You nodded tiredly.
As you approached the door, Rick readied himself. He locked in his handle bars, his metaphorical legs becoming locked springs of pressure and strength. Your hand grasped the knob.
"HYAH!" Rick let out, his handlebars springing open and his chassis doing a quick powerful spin.
The door slowly swung inwards with a long underwhelming creak.
"Hehe never stood a chance," his lower shutter rose pridefully as he turned his body towards you.
"Now off we go, darlin. Straight ahead, no time for standing around!"
There was a beat of silence, your eyes darting up at the other side of the door and then back down at him. What used to be an exhausted poker face now you at least held a limp amused smile.
"Buddy, this a supplies closet," you snickered, no malice flavoring your words.
"Huh?" His optic narrowed as he turned back towards the door, it revealing what his partner said, a dingy old dark closet with a dead lightbulb hanging from the cracked ceiling. "Oh uh... I knew that," Rick glanced down at the carpet, "Just testing ya, making sure your observation skills are sharp. That's all it is, sugar, making sure your head is in the game,"
"Really? Because it feels like YOUR head isn't really in the game right now," you teased as you walked into the closet, somehow ignoring the stench of dust. "Thought you said we could trust your gut on this,"
"My gut is a complicated man," he stated firmly, rolling his emerald eye.
You scanned the shelves closely, nothing on them too important unless you were a janitor. Things like cleaning spray, and a boxes full of bleach. It was like Aperture bought them in bulk. But your focus on that quickly turned towards the strange comfiness of the closet. It was small, yes, but after traversing somewhere as monolithic as Aperture it was somehow comforting being in something so small and simple. After completing dangerous never ending puzzle chambers, a room with such a simple purpose and housing things so quaint like a broom or mop calmed you. Being in here made you feel a sense of normality.
You don't think you were a janitor before all this, but seeing familiar objects and something you wouldn't question in everyday life, it made you feel safe in a surreal way.
You've been standing for like a full three minutes before Rick started clearing his none-existent throat, "Are we gonna get hustling now? Because unless there's an arsenal somewhere hiding behind a wall, I think we should get moving,"
You glanced back down to Rick, "... Lets take a break for a bit,"
"Huh," If Rick had eyebrows, which is an image you don't particularly want in your head, one would be raised.
"Why not? We've been walking forever now and it's not like we're on a time limit or something, lets just sit down for a bit," You lowered yourself to the floor, sitting and pressing your back against the wall. You didn't notice how stiff and tense you've been until you started to relax enough to start noticing the muscle aches. You let out a grunt.
"Since when did you start wearing pink panties?" Rick asked condescendingly as you took off your portal gun and plopped him into your lap, laying the device on the floor gently beside you two. You lazily wrapped your arms around the core, holding him close in an embrace and letting him rest against your body.
"Shut up, you got us into this mess with the whole elevator thing. You owe me one," You patted the top of his chassis softly, "Plus think of this like our secret base or something, that makes this cool to you right?"
"Eh whatever you say, darlin," he hummed, suddenly ceasing his complaining. "But this closet doesn't compare to my home base back in congo,"
"Really? Tell me more about it," You cooed, petting him softly, and letting your hand glide against the scratched up metal of his chassis. Rick giggled, soaking in on how goddamn lucky he was right now to have someone like you with him.
"I'll tell you about it if you gimme a little kiss from your pretty lips hm?" Rick's shutters drooped, his voice becoming husky but in a intentional embarrassing way and you could feel the metal getting warmer beneath your touch.
"Don't push it, bud," you smirked, Rick letting out a little huff as a response.
"Aw whatever, can't fault me for trying. So there I was, I was called back to where it all started when these ninja guys started-"
You suddenly pecked him, Rick being able to feel your lips touch him and suddenly it felt like spewing words were no longer apart of his programming.
"Wha huh-"
"Changed my mind, now tell me about those ninjas in Congo," Your tone betrayed that you definitely knew what you were doing, humorous and barely keeping back a laugh as you witnessed the usual boisterous core having to gather himself to be able to speak correctly.
"Eh, makes sense," Rick finally gathered with an aura of smugness, "I am pretty irresistible,"
"Sure you are," You replied sarcastically.
"Okay okay, you're getting me distracted, beautiful. So with the ninjas, they were sent at me, shotguns at the back and handguns in the holster. I was fighting off those bastards with nothing but my arm and my other arm-"
Check out the Portal 2 Shindig thingie community on Discord - hang out with 4 other members and enjoy free voice and text chat.
OKAY SO this is my little 16+ Portal 2 shindig thingie basically where
- WE HAVE A ROLEPLAY FORUM AND TUPPERS! You don’t gotta but i’d love to have a portal rp
- OC channels!
- Shipping channels for specific ships so you can focus on specific ships, avoid others, and suggest new shipping channels as well! Also a yumeshipping and OC shipping section!
- Eighteen and up channels THAT ARE ONLY MEANT FOR 18+
- Voicechannels!
- Places to put illustrations, fanfiction and edits!
SO ERM if you guys ever want to come to a cool new portal server that’d be pretty cool blink blink nudge nudge
how about a glados x reader where reader is just flirty and glados gets annoyed?
GLADOOOOOS YES YES This will be so cute
Glados x Flirty!Reader
Glados was originally considering dropping you straight down into the incinerator with all the incessant little quips you do when your supposed to be testing
The first you did it it was manageable, controllable. She mentioned how at the end of the tests you will receive cake and you said "Well I hope your name is cake then if you look as pretty as you sound,". She just casually brushed it off, saying she was flattered that a masochist like you would find her appealing but her priorities lay with science. Plus that she can do way better... Like the trash that gets clogged in the pipes. She expected that to be the end of it. But it just kept happening and you pause testing just to say them.
Things like "Ooo you're watching me? Well I mean i'm not complaining having your eyes... eye on me," or saying while looking straight at a camera "This one goes out to you, cupcake!" before completing a test.
She hated the name 'Cupcake' with a passion, she threatened to fill the chamber with neurotoxin if you kept demeaning her in such a way
But alas your testing scores were too high to exterminate you just like that. So she had to bare until she received enough data to finally relinquish you of your job and life so she never has to deal with these comments ever again
You would sometimes compliment her voice as well, that she could insult you all she wants if it meant she kept talking. She hated when you said that too, she would go on all the ways she could give you the most excruciating death imaginable and you would listen to her like it was pleasant. You would even ask questions just so she could keep going
"Aw I love when you say all those sweet nothings for me, Cupcake!" you would say, and she would then call you a dirty masochist then go silent until she had something else to say in the next chamber
You could hear fans whir a little bit louder then usual after you said that
When you were at the end of the testing track and was getting wheeled off to the incinerator, you escaped because of course you did. Once you entered her domain, you just stared at her with wide admiring eyes at the behemoth that has been talking to you and stalking you over the past only god knows how many hours you've been in this facility. There was a slight flush in your face as you leaned against the wall with a very cringy smirk going "Hey Cupcake,"
Glados scoffs, "I am a supercomputer with inconceivable knowlege, and I still do not know what you're trying to do right now,"
Yet she lets you live, possibly because she grew a liking to you or the most plausible, Glados reasons, is that you just give her far too much valuable testing data to just kill. There was so many different tracks, it would be a waste to have one of most experienced none-murderous test subjects she's had just go to waste
Definitely not because of that one time you sneaked a peck onto onto one of her claws when she was supposed to be grabbing you, not because of the million times you call her beautiful, not because of anything like that. No, definitely not.
ok so as you can prolly tell from my blog, the fact core is my favorite
I was wondering if I could request a fact x reader
where they and the reader are in a QPR together
and they go like clothes shopping and try on fun outfits together!
idk just a fluffy prompt I thought of :)
DAAAAAAWWW this is cute. I'v never written a QPR relationship before, so this'll be fun! Reminder he is a little spherical core guy in this :]
QPR! Fact Core x QPR! GN!Reader go clothes shopping
The Fact Core didn't know why you let yourself get distracted by a measly gift shop considering you two were in the middle of escaping.
It was just a little hole in the wall store meant for tour guests and others to visit so the company could receive some extra loose change here and there. It was filled with meaningless objects that could barely be considered needs or let alone valuable. Who would need a foam ball of the moon? A shirt with the company logo? A bunch of shiny rocks? It was all useless if you asked The Fact Core.
But for some reason you wandered in while Fact followed you on his management rail, him rolling his optic eye over the plethora of toys and knick knacks in disinterest.
"Fact: This place is of no use to our objective, we should leave," The Fact Core reminded again as he watched you giddily sift through the overpriced shirts, hoodies, jackets and more. The metal and plastic of the hangers clanking and echoing through the desolate area.
"Oh c'mon, we could use a break," You grin, 'oooing' when you found a shirt that interested you. You picked it up from the rack and hovered it over your body to judge the size. "What do you think of this?"
"Fact: A man named Scott Fitzgerald was the first man to invent the first printed t-shirt in 1920. Inventing the term T-Shirt in his novel and now all bands must consult with his corpse before making a T-Shirt to sell or else they will be sent to jail under law," Fact responded, monotone as ever with his upper metal eyelid drooped down.
"No, I meant how do you think it looks on me?" You chuckle, leading to Fact letting out a little scoff.
"Fact: It looks like you are holding a shirt,"
"No, I meant do you think I look good in it," you pushed.
"That is subjective, The Fact Sphere is incapable of judging on subjective matters," he dryly responded, which was honestly the most incorrect thing he has ever said.
You rolled your eyes and blew a little raspberry at him, "Whatever, i'm gonna go put this on. I'm getting tired of this jumpsuit sticking to my body and I need to put on something semi-clean," you shrugged and turned around but suddenly you took notice of a little shelf adorned with hats and beanies. You mischievously grinned as you put down the shirt for the time being and snatched up a cap with the words 'egghead' written on the front with a little embroidered humpty dumpty on the side.
You hid it behind your back before darting back towards your little robotic companion. He rotated back towards you, staring down. That was when you took your chance and slammed the cap down snugly on the top of his chassis. Fact's optic shrunk as he struggled to see what was on his head.
"Inquiry: What did you put on me?" He demanded in his usual even voice.
"The cap says what it says, Egghead," You chuckle, crossing your arms proudly.
Fact Core let out a little grumble, "Please take this off of me, hats were only invented because bald people were embarrassed of themselves where as the Fact Sphere has a full head of luscious hair that many aspire to have,"
"Aw c'mon, it looks cute on you," you grinned.
"The Fact Sphere has already said please,"
"Fine fine, don't get your wires in a bunch," You sigh as you slip the cap off of the little robot and tossed it down on the floor. It wasn't like anyone was going to complain on the mess anyway.
But as you were turning around and going to go back towards the abandoned shirt, you heard a little robotic gasp.
"Wait," You heard Fact say, the most emotion you've heard from him in a while.
You turned around to see the robot fixated on a sort of gag gift rack of prank toys and paraphernalia. He was eyeing a pair of glasses with bushy eyebrows, a big nose and a mustache sitting in a plastic casing. The casing had an image of a stereotypical clown on it with a blow-horn that had the bubbly title of "Blinky's Troublesome Gifts and Tricks!"
"Inquiry: Can you open this?" he asked, his digital pink eye shining.
"Why do you want me to open this thing?" You ask, tilting your head with a curious look. You picked up the toy, inspecting to see what was so special about it that it made your little bookworm buddy so minimally excited.
"Fact: Glasses were invented to set apart intellectuals from brainless louts," he explained, "Please open the glasses,"
"Buddy, these aren't the uh... Smart people sort of glasses, they don't even have lenses," You explained, trying not to laugh because of how genuinely adorable you found the little misunderstanding.
"The Fact Sphere has once again said please,” Fact insisted, his metal eyelids narrowing.
You roll your eyes, opening the plastic and taking out the joke glasses inside. The plastic felt cheap and the fake hair felt so thin you could barely feel the strands at all. You glanced towards Fact, cocking an eyebrow. Fact stood unfazed
“How am I even supposed to put these on you? You don't exactly have ears," You asked, raising an eyebrow
"Just hold them," Fact instructed and so you did, you pushed the hinges as far apart as they could go just so the glasses could even appear to look like the core was wearing them. The Fact Core looked at you, his pupil dilated with anticipation on your response.
"How does The Fact Sphere look?" He asked, his voice genuine like whatever your stance will be actually mattered to him. For once that is or maybe more, it was hard to tell with this guy sometimes on how much he valued your opinions on him. You wanted so bad to burst out into laughter, but despite the need to just explode, you took a deep breath and leveled yourself. All that left your lips was a chuckle, which was more warm than mean spirited.
"Very sophisticated, bud," You smiled.
The Fact Core's lower eyelid rose under the goofy accessory, a little twinkle in his optic.
"Wanna take it with us? Scrounge up some tape somewhere and maybe actually have you wear it," You offered, lowering it back down before you go back on that warmness and start toppling down with your hands around your sides choking out cackles.
Cores (Wheatley and the corrupted cores) with a reader that’s constantly changing hair colour? Kinda like Ramona flowers:3 tysm!!
OKAY I HAVENT DONE THESE IN A WHILE BUT I WANNA SO-
Cores x Reader who constantly changes their hair
Wheatley!
Okay first off, I don't think any of the cores know what hair dye is. Wheatley didn't know humans could come in the hair color you had when you first met him, so he'd ask something like "So um.. Not to be rude, your hair looks nice and all, really nice very bright, but uh- Is your hair naturally like that or were you born with it?" meanwhile your hair color is like a pastel green
The first time you dye your hair, Wheatley would be straight up baffled. He doesn't wanna come off as stupid so he'll just assume he just saw your hair wrong for a good while because what SMART person would forget what a person's hair color looks like. But he'd probably think he's going crazy until he actually asks what's happening.
He genuinely really likes your hair colors! But it takes some time to get used to each time you change it. Sometimes he'll bring up how he missed one or if he doesn't like a certain color he'll unintentionally be blunt about it
If you dyed your hair the color of his optic, he'd get so flustered like "Oh erm thank you, i'm honored to be your, erm, hair (I think that's how you would word it). Your hair copying my eye heh... That's sweet, really it is, very nice. Didn't know my eye looked that pretty,"
He brings up how he would probably do something similar with his hair too if he had hair
Rick!
He thinks you look so damn badass depending on what color you have
If your hair is like orange or red or a mix of both, he'd say something about your hair looking like an explosion on your head. He means this very positively
He loves when your hair is very bright and loud, especially if it's a mix of colors. Whether it be a fade, half and half, rainbow. He digs it.
I feel like he would make petnames revolving around your hair color sometimes like "Pinky," if its pink, "Sunflower" if it's yellow, "Blueberry" if its blue etc etc
If you dyed his hair the same as his optic (Thinking like mostly green but black near where the hair falls in front of the ears) I like to think he'd be super flattered to an embarrassing degree. Like clearing his throat that he doesn't have and going "This one might be my favorite so far, darlin! Looks hot considering it looks like me heh". Meanwhile he's kicking himself internally for being super damn flustered over it.
Fact!
Now usually Fact, admittedly, would probably not find dyed hair tasteful at first. Deeming it unprofessional or that the hair dye is gonna seep into your brain and give you cancer or something I don't know. But the more you grow on him, the more he starts to admire the look on you and actually really liking it since he associates dyed hair with you rather then being whatever definition he has of unprofessional.
I feel like he wouldn't have a preference on colors? Like at first he'll make some sort of negative comment like "A human's hair being red will make them a target towards sharks,", "A test subject's hair being purple means they are going to die in less then twenty four hours,". But gradually he starts making positive facts about your hair like "You having green hair means you have a greater chance of escaping,", "You having multi-colored hair means you are twenty percent more intellectual then other humans for the multitude of colors is transmitting different information to the brain through the stands. Magenta for example transmitting mathematical information specifically,"
Though if you dye your hair the same color as his optic, he will say that is the absolute best hair color for a person to have and that you should keep it always. He gets pissy when you change it.
Space!
DUDE HE WOULD LOVE YOUR HAIR SO MUCH
he will link whatever color you have to a certain planet and get all excited that your head is a planet
If you dye your hair to look like stars? Holy crap he will flip. Giggling hysterically and will show absolutely everyone about how absolutely amazing your hair is (AKA Turrets that you find in chambers)
"MY FRIEND IS THE STARS, MY FRIEND IS THE STAAARS" (This is funnier if you guys are dating)
If you dye your hair the color of his optic, he won't connect the dots that its supposed to look like his eye. He thinks its the sun and honestly he gets more excited over that assumption rather then you trying to mimic him
Can you maybe do Cave x Caroline x reader headcannons or maybe just Caroline x reader headcannons pretty please with neurotoxin ontop :3
THIS IS WHAT I LIKE TO SEE. But you got it Anon, you got it. Note: I'm kinda placing this during the 60s, so the golden years of Aperture.
Cave x Caroline x GN!Reader
~ You are Aperture's secretary! So you were very close to Caroline before you got closer to Cave
~ You literally just sit around in their office while doing work, sitting on some chair or couch in Cave's office despite having a designated office somewhere in the facility. Cave and Caroline find your presence very pleasant compared to everyone else
~ Dude these two spoil you rotten but in different ways. Caroline is more affectionate and traditional about it. Like say you like chocolate? She ordered you an assortment of chocolates from a candy store in town and thought you would appreciate it, they were carefully picked with the insides pertaining to other treats she's heard you enjoy. But with Cave it's a lot more well... Cave. You say you like sunflowers? Cave got the scientists to create a new breed of sunflower in your honor, they mutated, they're ravaging the facility and planting their offspring in the walls, run. On good days though, I think he'd just get you a shit ton of sunflowers and you have no idea where to put them in your home because of how many there are.
~ If it's your birthday or something, they negotiate business style to each other on what to do
~ "Did you order in the balloons, Caroline?", "Yes, Mr Johnson, in their favorite color", "The cake?", "In their favorite flavor. sir,", "The presents?", "Wrapped and bowed as soon as we bought them,", "The eggheads?", "Party hats on their heads, Mr Johnson,", "What did you tell them if they took the hats off?", "that they'll be fired as soon as the hat is taken off before the event is over,"
~ Sometimes you come to meetings with other companies despite having no place to be there except the fact Cave and Caroline wanted you there. You're kinda like their little purse dog honestly.
~ Cave and Caroline always run their ideas off you even if they've already run them off each other. They just like hearing your thoughts on them. Though if the feedback is critical, Cave most often then not ignores you and goes through with the idea anyway. Caroline assures you it's nothing personal and he's just passionate.
~ If anybody is as much as rude towards you, god help their soul. At best they're fired by Cave, at worst they get Caroline's wrath and are forced into some subject based unethical experiment. The scary thing is that she actually knows in detail the goings on in the facility compared to Cave, so she'll hand pick the consequence from her catalogue of ongoing projects in the facility. Look man Caroline is scary as hell.
~ You show up in the pre-recorded messages sometimes when you're in the room, usually just for a quick "Hi!" before getting back to work
You said you're more likely to do obscure characters so I'm curious: can you write something short about a male reader and The Announcer(it's the guy who talks in the background saying stuff like "you've been in suspension for 9 9 9 9 9")? I'm just curious about what you could come up with.. I imagine it's him as a robot (more like body less) and like, maybe the reader just walks around aperture talking to random unanimated stuff and the unanimated stuff starts talking back. It could be platonic or romantic, whatever you want
DUDE THIS IS WHAT IM TALKING ABOOUUUTT. I LOVE THIS, i love this a lot like actually. This is what we as the fandom need in this day and age. I fully support this, and I will totally do this.
~Male!Reader x Announcer~
~No warnings apply~
You might have officially lost it.
After the events of 'The Incident', you were the only living soul wandering around in this godforsaken facility. Maybe it was the humidity when you were only a floor separated from the incinerator below and making your work shirt stick to your skin, maybe it was the silence that threatened to make your mind feel hollow if it weren't for the facility constantly reminding you of how it was digesting your very being with every little scrape of metal or gear grinding in the distance.
But maybe you finally lost it when you started talking to inanimate objects, anything to make that aching loneliness numb for a few minutes. It started with talking to the cubes when you would hide out behind the walls of a testing chamber, it didn't even have to be the pink ones with the little hearts that were put in place to boost test subject morale, sometimes it would just be the dull blue ones staring at you with pure indifference. For some reason you felt more comfortable around those ones.
Then it started turning into having lively conversations with a can of beans you were eating, then sitting on the floor by a chair and talking about your day with it, and you started talking with any object that you deemed friendly enough to talk to. Never really talking to the Turrets though, they gave you a sick feeling whenever you heard their voices.
But talking with objects helped you stay sane or as sane as you could be while in this hellhole.
You were wandering the corridors of the dorms the test subjects used to reside in when they had to stay in the facility for multiple days at a time, the company not wanting outside forces interfering with the testing. The halls reminded you of a hotel almost, the nicely carpeted floors and the lights lining up against the ceiling. They even had some fake plants lined up in some places too, usually near the broken elevators or a vending machines. You were about to get some soda for your parched throat, after not having drunken anything in days the thought of some carbonated orange soda sounded like an oasis in a desert.
As you walked up to the machine, the artificial plants caught your eye. The greenery gave you an aching yearning from a time before, but it also made you feel a warmth that was so rare in a place like this.
You stopped mid-way, your lab coat swaying behind you as you turned towards one of the artificial potted plants. There was a little smirk hidden behind your tangled and overgrown beard.
"Come here often?" You ask with no hesitation.
"..."
"Heh I hear that. it's one of the more nicer parts around here," You replied flippantly. "Not many areas you can get carpet and chairs besides the offices, but who wants to hang around at work all the time am I right?"
"..."
"Yeah..." You let out a small dry laugh, "Well, i'm gonna get some soda from the vending machine right over here. You want one? I'm guessing since you're all plastic and foam you have a different diet from real plants,"
"..."
"Whoa! Take it easy there," You lifted and waved your hands defensively, taking a step back. "Sorry, I mean OTHER TYPES of plants. Didn't mean to press a button there, just wanted to see if you wanted some soda" your smile stretched into more of a jester like grin.
"..."
"Yeah yeah, now the soda is definitely on me," You playfully rolled your eyes and stared at the glowing orange machine. Citranium was written in small white letters, the logo being the Aperture brand but in the shape and color of an orange. Shame really that there wasn't really much variety, but you can't bite the hand that feeds you unless it starts choking you in the process then definitely bite it. But there was no biting required in this specific circumstance.
You pressed a button to see if maybe someone accidentally left a few dollars in the machine and forgot to order, but suddenly a speaker on the ceiling was triggered and your spine shot out of your back from the piercing hiss of the old intercom.
"Aperture science proudly announces it's newest and sweetest product since the m-" it cut out, leaving a horrible garbled mess of static before clearing up, "- Citrianium! Now test subjects can experience the wonders of science with every sip. Citrianium sources it's oranges from the farms founded in the agronomy department within Aperture Science itself. So we guarantee that by supporting Citrianium, you are also supporting your local farmers and is sourced organically. Note: The measures of organic may vary with each can and may cause unprecedented side effects depending on the amount,"
The voice from the intercom was robotic, but not monotone. The best way you could describe it was that you could feel the toothy smile the man had while talking. It had a pep to it to put it simply.
You must have triggered some sort of advertisement for the soda. It was almost foreign hearing an actual voice after so long of just faint sounds and inevitable silence as responses. But as you stared at the speaker with your head craned up high, it felt like a friend talking to you.
"W-well, do you think you can do a guy a favor and get me a soda? I'm kinda on the broke side right now," You asked the speaker, digging your hands into your lab coat pockets. You can feel the lint and dust at the bottom starting to pile up.
There was a small silence, but then there was a response.
"Citrianium can now be found in grocery stores and gas stations near you! Science in a can now at the low low price of two dollars each in American currency," The Announcer semi-replied cheerfully.
"Well, I don't really have two bucks on me right now," you huffed, sighing as you started eyeing a cushioned chair near an elevator. A smirk creased your lips when the light bulb went off. You cracked your knuckles, meandering towards the unsuspecting chair.
"Sorry pal, but a guy needs his drink," you mumbled before picking up the chair by the wooden armrests, it surprisingly being so light you could hold it over your head. You stared at the vending machine with determination, starting to charge towards it and preparing to smash it with the chair until it finally gave you a damn soda. But before you could take the swing, a bright shiny can was dispensed immediately.
"All staff get a complimentary Citranium for the hard work they give here at Aperture Science!" The Announcer chirped, "We appreciate your commitment, complacency, discipline, and respect! Keep up the hard work and remember that science starts with you,"
You almost dropped the chair on your foot when you fumblingly placed it on the ground. You couldn't tell if this was just coincidences or if you were finally going crazy or something else. Your attention drew to the speaker hanging over the machine. You couldn't recall the announcements themselves ever being sentient, but then again this place loved giving things sentience even when if it would be more humane for it to just be a simple object or mechanism.
You hesitantly picked up the can, the tin shimmering from the ceiling lights. It was still chilled in your grip. Your gaze lifted up to the speaker hanging over the machine once more, your mind flooded with intrigue and curiosity.
"Thank you," You chirped.
There was a loud hiss like it was struggling to give a proper response, "Ap- welco- Aperture Science welcomes yo- Wel- Welcomes you," was all he said before cutting out.
"Ha Well... I'll see you around," you sighed, shrugging off as you popped the can up to reveal the citrus smelling fizzing liquid inside. Maybe it was science in a can considering how long this soda was able to last.
You started walking down the corridors, going to go find stairs to hopefully find your way to the cafeteria the test subjects would lounge in every once in a while. But in every corner there was an intercom of some kind put in place, including the rooms as well if you could actually get inside them (Not that you particularly wanted to, not really in the mood to see a possible dead body).
But then you got another idea.
"Hey uh... Announcer guy? You don't happen to know where all the food is stored right," You ask, your eyes once again fixed onto the intercoms.
"Aperture Science cares very deeply about their test subject's and staff’s health and well being, which is why we found the food octagon back in 1965," he immediately replied, "Breakfast, lunch and dinner that have all categories of the food octagon are held in the dining hall on the first floor of the building,"
“Hm,” you hummed, “Are you gonna be sticking around me for a while?”
“Aperture Science constantly surveils their staff to see if they’re keeping up with their company mandated work quota to make sure science is being done throughout the day and they are following company policy,” he responded
“I’ll take as a yes,” you smile, happy that you’re finally talking to someone that talks back somewhat.
Hello my good sir, to whom which I have never interacted before in my entire life. I would simply like to request from your wares, perhaps some Space core X reader headcanons, specifically maybe either android or human design space core x reader headcanons. Perhaps even maybe some Corrupted core in general(Rick, Fact and Space) X reader hcs ...... If you choose to answer this ask I will be humbly grateful and possibly in your debt.
Hello good anon, and yes I will get to these! We need more people who have your fine tastes. Goodbye good shar- I mean everyday human with gills and sharp teeth. I'm making these guys androids cuz that's funner.
Android!Corrupted Cores x GN!Reader Headcanons!
Space Core!
~ No-one knows why you went for him.
~ Very physically affectionate! Like he'll ramble incomprehensibly for hours at a time about space while cuddled in your arms and laying his head on your shoulder. Not many people actually listen to him as much as you do, so he finds a lot of comfort in being around you.
~ This includes hugs. Lots and lots of hugs. Since he's made of metal it can sometimes be painful when he runs up and hugs you from behind while pressing his face up against your back. But you bare for his sake.
~ If you actually mention something about space, showing that you actually retained what he's said to you about the wonders of space, he'll actually start overheating and steam starts spewing out of him.
~ He constantly about talks about you two going to space together. He even drew you guys in a rocket ship in space on a whiteboard with sharpie once.
~ His petnames about you are space related, always, no exceptions. He even just straight up calls you Space sometimes despite that being his name as well, he just loves you so much that space feels like the only proper petname for you. Sometimes he'll just default to calling you sun because you're the center of his solar system.
~ He giggles hysterically whenever you kiss him
~ If you fall asleep on him, he'll just hum or talk to himself while holding you until you wake up.
~ Makes up space songs for you two to sing together, mostly preexisting love songs that he just parodies to be about space. You sing so loud that it echoes around the facility
~ You're the only one who really understands what he's trying to say all the time, sometimes acting as the translator for him when Space can't help but add space related words into a none-space conversation
Rick!
~ Constantly has an arm around you or is holding your hand
~ Flirts with you CONSTANTLY. Like he'll work a pick-up line or compliment into every damn conversation you have with this guy. As long as it gets some sort of reaction out of you, he'll keep doing it.
~ Though if you give him the same energy back, he'll try to brush it off like "I know that darlin, mighty sweet coming from you though," and hopes you don't notice the steam spewing out.
~ Constantly tells you stories from his 'adventures', while you just sit back and humor him for a bit. He genuinely thinks you believe the stories about him beating up 100 ninjas with nothing but his bare fists or when he tells you the story about how he single-handedly blew up Black Mesa.
~ Protects you from danger to try and impress you even if it's just a turret on the other side of the room and facing the opposite way.
~ Speaking of which, he is constantly trying to impress you. If not stories, it's him throwing himself into meaningless danger like a Turret shooting range and you being forced to repair him.
~ If he has a hat (and of course he does), he'll put his hat on your head and say "Well ain't that cute,".
~ The ultimate hype-man. He has actually does think very highly of you and respects you in his own way. So if you're doing something, especially if it revolves around fighting, he is CHEERING for you if he was forced on the sidelines. Constantly yelling to check for pressure points, to kick whatever's ass, trash talking the opponent, telling you to hit harder because he knows you can do it.
~ Though if it's something outside of fighting and action, something he doesn't really understand the appeal of, it'll sound like he's being passive aggressive at first but it's just because he doesn't really have a filter and does genuinely think you're good at whatever you do but doesn't know how to word it. But after some time passes, he'll just word the compliment like "You're kicking ass, sweetheart!" even if it's something super chill.
~ He picks you up bridal style and carries you whenever he can
~ He asks for kisses a lot too if he thinks he did something badass. Y'know that one meme where it's like "Has never kissed anyone before vs expecting tongue". His kisses are a combination of those two things because his only real references are from action movies.
Fact!
~ Unlike Space and Rick, he is not as physically affectionate. It would take him a while to actually initiate physical contact, which is probably like the most awkward hug in the world or him just pressing his mouth to your cheek. Not even kissing, just pressing his straight lips to your cheek and dryly going "mwah". He's trying is all I'm saying
~ But most often he just pats your shoulder or head, he makes sure to be careful since human skulls are allergic to metal.
~ His form of compliments would come in the form of facts. Like he would say your eye color means you would be inherently better then other people or that humans with your face are statistically more good looking then other humans.
~ When Fact says that "Fact: The Fact Sphere is the most handsome sphere" and you confirm it in some way, he just stays silent for second and process. Suddenly you start hearing fans.
~ Whenever he would go on his Fact rambles, no matter how correct or incorrect the information is, if you ask questions about it you might actually hear a hint of enthusiasm because you were actually listening to him.
~ He tries to memorize every single aspect and trait about you. To your favorite color, favorite food, your hobbies, your habits. But then the corruption kinda jumbles the information up a bit, and kinda gets those traits skewed. Like he'll give you something that he thinks is your favorite color, but in actuality it's the color that's opposite of your favorite color. But he is convinced that he's getting all the information right.
~ You're the only person who he'll ask questions for if he's interested in the topic you're talking about. He likes gathering information from you because he deems you a reliable source of information. Because outside of himself, you're the most intelligent being he knows.
~ Despite believing he is the sphere best suited to be a romantic partner, he reviews his data base every once in a while to see if he's "meeting quota to being a good partner"
~ He tries to give you petnames but there always kinda wonked up like instead of baby he called you "Infant", and instead of sweetheart he called you "Salty Esophagus".
I got so many cool requests and THANK YOU SO MUCH!! I’m working on the oneshots and headcanons as we speak. Again thank you for the support! I’ll get back to you guys soon
