I realized I haven't posted here in a while and Super Bowl season is rolling around again. I want to share a post I did on sports last year, that was posted elsewhere. Yes, it's long, and, yes, some of you've been trained by modern media to have microscopic attention spans. I broke it up into little paragraphs for you.
Sports:
I've been writing about this over and over the last couple days, so it's time to put it all in one place. A buddy of mine had a more personal post, regarding not shitting on things your friends like. Mine is more general.
Sports are not evil. Sports are good.
Listen, I'm sorry if you had a shitty sports experience. Seriously. I was hit in the balls with a soccer ball when I was in Junior High because my parents didn't know enough to get me a cup. It was the last time I played soccer and probably still colors my view of it.
I've watched the same degenerate news stories as you have, regarding sports figures. Rape, murder, dog fighting, drugs, etc. Those are indefensible actions take by criminals. I can't even say the riches they got through sports weren't a factor, because they may have been.
I do, know, however, that you all know Michael Vick's name, but you probably don't know who Rodell Vereen is. Rodell buggered a horse in South Carolina. He was arrested for it, served jail time, then was released on parole. First thing he did? Found his way back to the same farm, same horse, to bugger it again.
Now, of course, we don't hear about Rodell because the media doesn't care about homeless schizophrenics as much as they do multi-million dollar quarterbacks. That's the media's fault and our fault, for paying attention to them.
My point is, though, for every Rodell, there are many, many schizophrenics (and people from South Carolina), who don't fuck horses. And for every Vick, there are many, many quarterbacks (nee football players) that didn't hold 6-8 dogs underwater until they drowned, just for not fighting well enough.
Let me give you some personal background. I was not encouraged to participate in sports as a kid. I was free to, but I didn't have the parent over my shoulder pushing me into it. I ran a little track, ran cross country, but mostly tried to draw comics and play Dungeons and Dragons.
Sometime between 17 and 19, I grew to love football. I'm not sure how or why, I just started watching it occasionally, and playing pick-up tackle with friends on Sundays. I decided, in my early 20s, that I was going to play semi-pro football, my first brush at organized ball.
Semi-pro leagues are made up of basically two types of players. Ex-pros or ex-college athletes that still feel the burn to compete; and people too stupid to get college scholarships (yes, it's possible). I played with both.
We had a guy that literally couldn't figure out how to line up to the right and go in motion left before the snap. Don't worry about the lingo, just imagine not being able to figure out you have to put the car in reverse to go backwards when you're learning to drive.
He was an idiot with about 5% body fat. Even at the beginning level of experience I had, my brain in his body would have made me millions.
But, I also played against ex-NFL players, guys who were at one time, the elite. Because even a guy that gets cut from the NFL after a year, even the guys on their practice squads, are elite athletes that worked really, really hard to get where they are.
Anyway, I played for about three years, but I never lost the love. I still play contact flag football on the weekends and I am way past the age some guys even toss a ball around with their kid. I never really thought I was in good shape, but that's because I go to a gym on a regular basis. Looking around at people near my age, even some people younger than me, and I guess I am.
During this whole time, I also never stopped doing what I'd been doing since I was nine. Which was draw, write, and play games. I actually quit playing semi-pro to go to the Joe Kubert School of Cartooning.
I guess what I'm trying to say is while most of you are breaking up into camps of gamers or jocks, you can do both. In fact, you should do both.
But we all know that, too.
So, you hear stories about football players raping underage girls. Football is bad. You think the US is the place where "neanderthals" play football. Football players are stupid. That sports team is extorting money out of your city for a new stadium. Pro football teams are evil. The NCAA is ruining colleges. It's evil, too.
I'm going to tell you a story about a kid named Peter. Peter was on the second team of the three teams I coached in Little League Baseball. I had the losers of the losers. The league I was in had try-outs and then the "major" teams drafted the kids they wanted. Any other kids that signed up were put into the "minors".
Those teams had trouble coming up with coaches, so they usually had too many kids. Fifteen to seventeen a team, which, in a six inning game where everyone has to play, makes for only a bat or two a kid a game.
I had a "minor" team, made up of the kids other "minor" coaches didn't want. They basically gave me their three worst kids, out of a team made up of the worst kids.
The basic idea was good, to give the kids more playing time, but, man, some of those kids were painful. But they all wanted to play.
Peter was a tall, gangly kid who couldn't hit a baseball to save his life. He could barely catch, though he threw alright. Peter played in every game that season (as required) and, aside from a couple of walks, either stuck out or hit into an out every single at bat. We worked on his hitting during practice and he kept a positive attitude.
Wait, did I say every? I meant all but one. On his very last at bat in the very last game of the season, Peter hit his one and only, no shit legit, single. It was a story you couldn't sell Disney for a movie about a kid getting his first hit at baseball.
Now, Peter would probably not go on to play baseball much longer and I have no idea where he ended up. What I do know, though, without a doubt, is that that one moment, like a bad movie cliche, he will remember his entire life.That kid was lit. up. running down to first base. We treated it like a game winning home run.
For perhaps the first time, but definitely not the last, Peter learned that working hard at something and keeping a positive attitude really does pay off. Peter learned one of the most important life lessons a person can learn and fuck you in your cynicism if you think otherwise.
Why does this matter? Because what happened with Peter happens every. fucking. day. somewhere in this country and the world. Probably hundreds of times. Because every day we've taken energy that was originally spent on warfare and struggles for food, by those very neanderthals you think they are, and turned it into something positive.
Poor and want your kid to get to college? Your options are sports and military. Choose. Want your daughter to have a statistically significant lesser chance to be raped, a much smaller chance for an unwanted pregnancy, and a much higher chance for a positive body image, no matter what that image is? Put her in sports and thank Title IX.
What to teach your children good eating habits, good exercise habits, how to work as a group to achieve a goal, how to handle failure and setbacks?
Now, I know what you're thinking. You've heard or seen or experienced those crazy ass competitive parents, yelling at their kids or his coach or her umpire. Well, fuck those people. That's not sports' fault. It's bad parenting. Like those parents that give their kids beer or teach them to smoke.
Football didn't rape that underage girl. Football didn't drown those dogs or murder that guy. Football doesn't set a car on fire after a Super Bowl win or punch a guy for wearing the wrong colors at a stadium.
People that do stupid criminal shit, are criminals.
If you want to have a discussion about why we spend so much more in military than schools, let's do that, I'm with you. If you wish some parents weren't assholes to their kids, I've got your back. Hell, I've umpired Little League games, I've seen it personally.
You want to rant about the NFL being a non-profit, rant on, it's a fucking stupid loophole.
But sports. Sports! Goddamn, what a glorious thing.
Full of math and physics and human behavior and how we treat success and deal with failure and every fucking thing that makes up our fabric as beings.
Little secret, when you put on a football helmet and run down the field, you can't hear shit. All you hear is wind blowing through the ear holes and you feel like you're running a million miles an hour. You aren't a leaf on the wind, you're a spear, flying through at the speed of sound.
I am so, so, sorry if you don't get it. I really, really am. Because to be able to share my love of a thing with you would make me as happy as... well, anyone that derives love from sharing something with someone.
Remember when I said I coached Little League? I coached Little League even though I didn't have kids. I did it because I knew sometimes losers get lost in the shuffle and I wanted to show them, perhaps ironically, that skill does not determine how much we love doing something.
Remember when I said I game? I take equal delight in scoring touchdowns as I do confirming a critical hit in Dungeons and Dragons, beating a map on X-Com, or finishing the first draft of a script.
One just makes me eat better and take care of myself.
So, again, if you've had a bad sports experience, I'm very sorry.
We live in a decisive time and if you want to get into fights with people over something they love, then I guess that's your right. But, again, sorry for those assholes. If they didn't have a big game, they'd find a different excuse, trust me. Try to remember the happiness of your friends and loved ones that are into it and take joy they're happy.
But you already knew that.