Dr. Emily Winters

Psychiatrist and Psychologist at Blacklist Asylum

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“Not for the same reasons. The first time I slept with him I had planned to do it. When I got there I changed my mind but the seed was already planted and we did it anyway - and it was fine. Then after that it was just… Assumption. Dan told my once that I needed to learn the difference between doing things because I want to and doing things because I can. I sometimes forgot that sex was something people did for fun and not because it was their responsibility. Dan called it a compulsion.”

“So you felt that you had to continue having sex with this man just because it had happened before? Do you see it as a compulsion?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“I was torn up over it for a while but I think it was worse because I didn’t know if I had a right to be.”

“Well, based on what you’ve told me, it seems you did have the right to be. Do the things that happened during that week still upset you?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“I stayed with him for a week. We drank a lot that week. I didn’t have a phone so any contact with my parents was through him. It just got messy, you know? I knew at the time that it was bad - I wanted to go home. We.” He frowns, trying not to get caught up in the white lie he’d opened with. “We had sex more times than I think I was fully… Aware of. I never said no to him or cursed him for things he- we did, later. But I remember thinking at the time; ‘he must know’. I remember telling him I was sorry for… Is this weird? That I’m telling this whole story? Just, I– I mean I don’t usually say this much, I guess. I don’t know what is and isn’t important.”

“No, no it’s not weird. Just go ahead and say what comes to your mind. We can pick out the... important parts later.” Winters shifts in her seat.

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“I started sleeping with him when I was fourteen and he was… In his late thirties. Couldn’t tell you exactly how old he was, honestly. There was this week when I was seventeen, though. I was skipping school and stashing a couple weeks worth of meds. Had this huge argument with my family.” He rolls his eyes. “This is going somewhere, I promise.”

Winters simply nods rather than saying anything, urging him to continue.

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

He glances down to her notes, nods. “Yeah. Okay, thanks.”

She gives him a small smile as she sets down her pen, “Whenever you’re ready, go ahead.”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“I got caught up with someone who wasn’t…” He shakes his head, dismissing the though. “He was family friend. I stayed with him for a few days, because everyone figured it’d be good for me. But he was-” He stops again, frowns. “Is this confidential? I mean, this goes nowhere, right? Nowhere at all.”

Winters gives him a firm nod, “Yes, completely confidential. I’ll even leave it out of my notes if you would prefer it that way.”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“Yeah, alright…” Spencer pauses to think, gaze drifting over the room until something comes to mind. “Okay. When my brother used to ask where I disappeared to and with who, I’d tell him stuff like… ‘I can’t tell you, you’ll be mad,’ or, ‘I can’t tell you, he’ll be mad.’ Dumb stuff to make him worried. Got to the point where he thought I was in some kind of dangerous situation when in reality I was… Eating pizza with guys from school or fooling around with people more harmless than I was. He’d catch me out sometimes, but then he’s fall for it again later.” Spencer shrugs. “It blew up in my face.”

She nods once he finishes speaking, repeating his words back to him, “It blew up in your face?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“I don’t know. Like, I really, honestly don’t know.”

“Why don’t you describe to me an example of one of these situations?”

[heystella-lunden]

the wholehearted and half-mad

While Stella hadn’t planned for the day to go like this, it had become the opportunity she was waiting for. It was later than she was used to. Her session had been rescheduled to after dinner- at this point in the day she would have already been winding down. But today, things were different.

She had walked into the office and sat down in the recliner as she always does. After piling some papers on the desk, Dr. Winters settles on the couch across from Stella, looking a bit tired.

Keep reading

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“Right. I think maybe I’ve been in a lot of situations I haven’t wanted to be in too, and for the same reason, the… Individual I’ve been in that situation with has… Doubted my… Fuck. Whatever.”

“... Do you mean in terms of consent?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“I used to lie a lot. I mean I guess I still do. I liked to exaggerate; I was dramatic. I liked to make people worry about me and sometimes it backfired. Sometimes it still does.”

“And now some people don’t believe you when there’s actually something wrong?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“I’ve had people compare it to the boy who cried wolf.”

“How so?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“No, it makes me feel like a child.”

“So you’d rather not talk about it at all?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“It’s not that I don’t want you to know what I’m talking about, it’s just that I don’t want to say it.”

“So it doesn’t make you feel better when you talk about it?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“It’s safe to assume that I’m always talking about sex.”

“... Yes. Of course.”

[dr-winters]

raymondwalters‌:

“It was the other doctors jobs too, but they never bothered. It feels like you actually care.” He begins picking at the bandage on his neck, peeling the edge of the medical tape.

“That’s because I do.” She watches him pick at his bandage, stopping herself from reprimanding him. “When you were a small child, how did you imagine your adult self?”

[dr-winters]

spencer-quinn‌:

“Sorry.”

“It would be easier if you told me what you’re referring to.”