xx

Drew Stoll || 1/4 Nike 1/4 Hermes

[drewxstoll]

charlalbr:

charla put her weapons away and crossed her arms. “hmm—how do i know you aren’t lying? for all i know you’re just saying you’re drew so i won’t kill you. tell me something only the real drew would know.” she gave him a hard look, trying to remember his face. “i don’t know the face or even a phillip.”

“uh, there are a lot of things only i know, brug.” he look a second to think about what would convince her best. “the reason i can’t sing is because apollo cursed me. after some begging and offerings from you, he budged and made me super good at rapping, but he stood his ground on taking my singing talent.”

[drewxstoll]

[text] drew >> phillip

[drewxstoll]

phillipartist:

phil: much appreciated, I burn easy. I’ll… idk moisturize? any idea how long this is supposed to last?

drew: phillip i’m all natural and blessed you literally don’t need to do anything just shower keep me clean please. i will cry. but also don’t wash your hair every day skip a day or two but do a spritz of aloe gel it helps kill bacteria. maybe it’ll just be a a few hours?

[drewxstoll]

charlalbr:

“really? i guess that makes things interesting,” charla was excited, she’s never fought someone as tall as the person in front of her. “i’m guessing you just ate him so i can beat his soul out of you and then finish you off. i’ll probably have time to stop by chuck e cheese too.” she dropped her bag and conjured two swords, figuring she should have an extra just in case.

if drew was in his own body, he’d have no issue fighting this younger charla. but this was not his body, and while phillip wasn’t as weak as their little trio constantly joked, he was significantly weaker than charla. “oh, shit. charla, i’m kidding! some weird stuff is going on in camp and i, drew,  have switched bodies with this dude named phillip. do you really not recognize him?”

[drewxstoll]

charlalbr:

charla knew exactly where to meet: their treehouse. granted, she was nervous. she was 15 and had no idea how old drew would be. to her surprise, she saw someone she didn’t recognize. at all. for one: he was white. “excuse me–who the fuck are you and why are you leaning on my tree?”

as soon as drew saw charla looking like a mickey mouse club reject that spent her evenings at chuck e. cheese, he knew they were doomed. there was no way he was getting his body back, not today, at least. “in order to become the most powerful person at camp, i had to eat your friend. sorry, kid.” he might as well mess with her since there was no chance of them getting anything productive done. 

[drewxstoll]

[text] drew >> phillip

[drewxstoll]

phillipartist:

phil: enjoy being the pastiest person at camp ps I hate this

drew: i am enjoying it thank you every much i’ve got spf 50 i’ll keep u lookin like a ghost and skin cancer free

[drewxstoll]

[text] drew >> phillip

drew: enjoy being the most beautiful person at camp 😘

[drewxstoll]

Drew wasn’t freaking out. Stuff like this happened every once in a while and it was usually an easy fix. It was even easier since his best friend had magic. He arrived to their tree and leaned against it, waiting for Charla to arrive.

[drewxstoll]

[text] drew >> charla

[drewxstoll]

charlalbr:

charla: i’m gonna b rl with u, probs not but i can try??

drew: i believe in u. c u in like 10 min

[drewxstoll]

[text] drew >> charla

drew: charla weird shit is happening rn can you fix it?

[drewxstoll]

magic anon: you've swapped bodies with phillip artist (until 11/16)

No, no, no, no. I can’t be....white.

[drewxstoll]

cristinasharper:

Starting to crack under the pressure of celebrity, Drew?

It’s weird. You can’t tell me it’s not.  It’s not like I have any actual talent.

[drewxstoll]

aria-garcia:

Oh… I don’t get it then. Well, I mean I do kind of get it, cause I know when I was fifteen I went through that stage and I almost joined the club, but then I thought it would be weird since Charla’s my cousin and you guys are best friends and–… [sighs sadly] This isn’t something I wanted to admit in front of you…

Drew, please do me a favor and just kill me now.

Aria, it’s okay. It’s kind of funny, but it happens, I guess. I think it’s just like, why me? There’s definitely better looking people at camp, too. 

For example, Minho is def good looking. Phillip is cute too but he might also just be white. It’s also the whole nerd thing he has going on. Them and others deserve fans too. 

[drewxstoll]

aria-garcia:

Oh. Well, I guess you have a point, there’s no way to just like dismantle the fan club now… How do celebrities lose fans? Maybe you could talk publicly about old and boring stuff?

I do talk publicly about old and boring stuff. One time I talked about vintage weapons for two hours and then they gifted me all the weapons I talked about.

I don’t understand?

[drewxstoll]

aria-garcia:

If you don’t want a fan club, you might want to stop directly addressing them on social media. It fans their flames.

You see, I’m just conflicted because the fact that I have one is a lot of pressure. I appreciate them but also have a constant fear of letting them down. 

[drewxstoll]

Do you think there was a Drew at the island? Did he not have a fan club because if he didn’t I suddenly out of nowhere want to be him. 

[drewxstoll]

charlalbr:

phillipartist:

Close enough. I’d have to be a time traveler to be the Zodiac Killer, but still, how wild would that be right?

Anyway. Do you guys not have a Phil here, or…?

Drew, use your head. She can’t be the Zodiac Killer, she obviously isn’t Ted Cruz. —Wait, when did Ted die? She could be his reincarnation. Honestly, it wouldn’t be that wild. We’ve dealt with wilder. Yeah, we have a Phil or had a Phil. He got eaten by a portal. Dark times.

How do you know Phillip, anyway? Wait, Oh gods. I know what’s going on here. Charla, I think Phillip cheated on us with this person. He sinned and how he’s dead. All we’re left with is grief and his secret lover. 

[drewxstoll]

charlalbr:

phillipartist:

Oh my gods, yes. The biggest fan, actually. I think I have your zodiac constellations tattoo’d on me somewhere. Anyway, you’re clearly not my  hashtag Darla, so this is mildly disappointing. Shame.

What…? Drew, I’m confused, explain what she said to me.

Uh, something about being the Zodiac killer. 

Also, I think we’re not us?