& T W I S T Y

indie. sel. priv.

[drgrcy-blog]

like this for a starter as i try to bring back my inner meredith ( and find her icons again )

[drgrcy-blog]

lexie grey

     ❛❛ a-a bus. the bus i-it hit a lorry. d-dad was on the bus. ❜❜      it’s taking all she has to not sob, to not break down right there in the middle of the room. his l i c e n s e was suspended six months ago, after a bout of dui’s finally caught up to him. he’d taken to the bus, often told lexie about the weird yet wonderful folk he encountered.      ❛❛ meredith, m-my dad was in an accident. ❜❜      only now, as she’s retelling the story of how her father may be p e r m a n e n t l y leaving her, does it hit. does the seriousness of the situation come to fruition, and she’s terrified. 

          everything hit the blondes ears at once. a bus crash. her dad was on the bus. their dad was on the bus. she could feel her heart sink, even if on the outside the oldest sibling looked as cold as stone. did she love the man? she did have the same closeness lexie shared with him? NO. not even close. but never in a hundred lifetimes would she wish for that to happen to him.             snapping back to reality, meredith grabbed onto her sister’s shoulders. ‘ lexie, lexie grey, look at me ’ she commanded. ‘ we are a level one trauma center. he will be taken here before any other hospital. and here, here we have two of the best trauma surgeons on call. two surgeons who know he is our FATHER and will not let him die. okay? he is strong. just like you. ’

[drgrcy-blog]

april kepner

                     “don’t give me the speech.”  april’s quick to reply,  allowing herself to give half a chuckle after meredith had finished speaking.  “but you know most patients are just plain impatient.  they’re not getting anxious about not being able to pick up their newborn.”  she adds in her own defense.  eyes drift away for a moment,  wishing that she had her daughter to look at but knowing she was at home  ( hopefully sleeping )  with her father’s doting protection.  separation anxiety was certainly not helping her situation.  women were supposed to deal with it after they came back to work off of maternity leave  ––  not after nine months of carrying their child and then suddenly being stuck in a hospital.  “i’m going to have to hire someone to take care of her and watch her bond with some random mama bird while i lay there and waste away.  i’m going to end up a stranger to her between that and the custody agreement.”

           it was then did meredith begin to think back to when she had given birth to her son. how she had to stay locked up in the hospital while the incision, as well as the internal injuries she sustained from her tumble down the stairs became clear, healed. and it was then, seeing april, did she realize how strangely thankful she was that bailey was premature. only because that meant her time in the hospital was never without him. so arizona and alex could monitor his growth, he could stay beside her through the long nights. and to think about watching derek leave with him as she stayed behind did make the inner mother within yearn for the red head. when she spoke about hiring someone, meredith began to think back to the few who made her final three when it came to finding a nanny for her own children. ‘ if you need someone, i know a great person who will watch her. and as for her bonding with that woman over you. it’s not going to happen. trust me. i was so scared leaving ellis so young with a stranger. i was sure of the exact same. but if anything, she get’s more excited to see me when she stays with the nanny. and as for the custody agreement; i don’t know jackson as well as you do, but i highly doubt he will be so anal about it that he wont keep you involved and forefront when she is with him. i know right now it’s all words, but it is true. ’ exhaling, mere gave the hospital bound woman the best smile she could muster. ‘ but right now, if you want to avoid making this room your permanent home, you will not stress over it all and let yourself heal. because the more you stress and worry yourself, the less likely you will heal fast and the longer you will be here. ’

[drgrcy-blog]

jo wilson

          “I know.” Jo sighed. “I know he loves me, but he can’t just— he didn’t even give me a chance to explain.”

          ‘ come on; you know alex. you know exactly what he is like when he gets protective and scared. you can’t reason with him. but torturing him like this, it isn’t helping. if anything he is getting worse. he needs you jo. if not as a girlfriend, at least to know that you are still on his team. ’

[drgrcy-blog]

reed adamson

‘yeah. it wasn’t my first choice, neither was seattle grace but mercy west is not an option anymore so here i am.’ reed had no qualms dissing her former employers as she truly had only been working at the seattle presbyterian for convenience’s sake and although terrible memories came with a residency at grey sloan’s at least there she’d be doing her best work as opposed to coasting by. ‘oh i already got it, i just need to get some details about my shifts ironed out. i can’t do the hours I used to anymore.’

             ‘ well it is nice to see a familiar face again ’ meredith was never extremely close with reed when she had come over with the other group of residents from mercy west, dressed in their orange scrubs and all. but just like april and jackson had shown meredith grey, that there was a lot more to those invaders than meet the eye. ‘ when do you officially start here? ’

[mxmstoons]

Why did auntie Maggie stop having S-E-X with DeLuca?

[drgrcy-blog]

izzie stevens

          ‘ izzie, she is not even a year old. and she already sleeps in bed with me 99% of the time. ’ meredith was struggling to see just why izzie was so adamant on dragging her to get her youngest daughter enough things for a whole nursery makeover. sure, she did not have a lot for ellis’s new room. but in her complete defense, meredith did not plan to move back into the dream house when she found out she was pregnant with her daughter. let alone coming back to seattle. and the nursery she had in her small condo was not large enough for the types of things izzie kept preaching she was missing from ellis’s room. ‘ i really don’t get why you are so headstrong about redecorating every part of ellis’s room. i had all the furniture with zola and bailey and it is all still in great shape. i don’t see the issue! ’

[drgrcy-blog]

HEADCANON

it took months and months with many ups and down in the life of meredith grey. from raising three kids on her own, to near full blown catastrophes threatening to cripple those she cared for most, and through many fights and great memories made, meredith knew there was one change that needed to be made. the cold hard truth was, she never could let the house she built with derek go. to sell it felt dishonest and wrong. and so when she moved back to her mother’s house –– a place that never felt like home –– she left the dream house vacant. hoping one day to return. and soon after her youngest daughter’s first birthday she knew the time was right. the time for no roommates. a time for just her and her children to return to the house their father dreamed of. the house his memory still could be felt in each corner. a house, of which, was not just four walls with windows and doors. it was a home. and when all three walked through the front door again for the first time, all four knew they were finally HOME.

[drgrcy-blog]

[drgrcy-blog]

[lorelaiscoffee]

And how do we make it stop?

[drgrcy-blog]

lexie

     when something life-changing happens, you remember where you are. when you receive a phone call, telling you that your older sister has been attacked and you need to come in on the only day you had off that week, you remember what you were doing. lexie was doing laundry – sorting between clothes that belonged to zola, bailey and ellis. as soon as miranda bailey had finished her sentence, she had whisked them up and placed them into the car that belonged to their mother. it wasn’t her time to be upset, wasn’t her time to cry and panic. she was in charge, she was the one that had to get them into daycare and artfully avoid questions that may let them know exactly what was going on.       today however was not her day off. today lexie had surgeries, today she had to be a surgeon, a life-changer. still, distraction affected the woman easily, and she’s finding herself in meredith’s room at the first chance.       ❛❛ mere, hey. i’m here. the kids are with alex, so they’re doing okay. ❜❜      what was okay now? was okay the fact that meredith was lying in a hospital bed? was it that the children were almost orphans? was it that the village holding everyone up was slowly beginning to c r u m b l e?       ❛❛ can i have this? ❜❜      it’s a little insensitive, to ask whether she can steal the jell-o cup that’s sitting on the tray in the room, but it isn’t as though meredith can eat it and lexie was barely coping. barely keeping her head above water while she’s attempting to fill the very, very big shoes of the fantastic meredith grey.       ❛❛ i-i know you can’t really talk. and i know that we’re not really a touchy-feely family, which is totally fine, but.. i know that you usually drink tequila when you’re sad and you can’t. but when i’m sad, and when i’m hurt, people stroke my hair. you, you stroke my hair. so now i’m going to sit here, until i’m paged to go into my next surgery, and i’m going to stroke your hair. okay? ❜❜

            she never knew how little she took something as simple as speaking for grated. how much she never took or spent even a second about what she would do if she ever lost the ability to speak. until the moment came when she literally couldn’t. never did she think how hard it would be to sit there as life moved on around her while she was frozen within a hospital bed. too broken to move, unable to call for help, to do practically anything for herself. and the hardest thing of all was, not being able to hold or even see her own children; the three little ones that brought so much light into her life. the three little ones she swore to always protect and be there for now, where alone while she sat chained within a hospital bed. praying that they were okay, that all three of them were being cared for. that all three were happy.               when her sister seemed to read her mind and tell the broken woman that her children were with alex, that they were okay, her face softened knowing at least they were with someone she could trust. and not just in the day care –– again. when the conversation turned to that of the jell-o on her tray, meredith let her eyes connect with the plastic cup of which she was sure was a sick joke they were playing on her seeing as she could not eat. her head nodded gently as to not cause more pain. the hands he had around her neck, the feeling of her head hitting the glass window left a lingering pain any type of head movement greatly exacerbated. however, when meredith heard lexie began to speak more like herself, she began to relax more herself. in any other circumstance meredith would straight up laugh at lexie she would have pitched stroking her hair in any other situation. but in this time, this time she was not objecting. for the fact, for the first time a acutal person and friend had come to see her. not another white coated surgeon. not another doctor. but the person she needed in this moment.

[drgrcy-blog]

bailey shepherd

           “Give me a second! I can’t find my other shoe,” he said shouting back, as he frantically searched his room. A the threat of not going to going camping this weekend, Bailey ran down stairs, with only one shoe on. “That’s not fair, you said you’d let me go, already!” Suddenly that took importance over his missing shoe. “No take-backs!”

            when she heard the echo of lop-sided running through the halls of the house and down the stairs, a small smirk grew on her face as the mother slash surgeon finished putting together her kid’s lunches. did she had any desire to pull her son away from his camping trip? never. for she was not sure who was more excited about it. bailey, owen, or even zola; because with bailey gone she had a whole girls weekend planned. but it truly was a great incentive to get him to hurry. ‘ what’s not fair is being late again because someone doesn’t keep his shoes by the door like i asked a million times ’ sliding over a bowl of cereal, meredith zipped the last lunch box closed. ‘ oh, no take-backs huh? because i think with being your mom, also comes with the ability to always do take-backs. ’

[cardiogcdess]

GREY’S ANATOMY QUOTES STARTERS MASTERLIST

’ I believe if you were dead the world would be a better place. ’

’ You are not my knight in shining whatever. ’

’ I’m not sure we’re worth fighting for. ’

’ I’m gonna eat candy in the dark and pretend I’m home alone. ’

’ Sometimes it’s actually painful to be around you. ’

’ They say if you talk out loud while you look for something, you find it faster. ’

’ This is your love day. ’

’ I’d lose that crazed smile before you start cramping. ’

’ It’s harder to love someone than walk away from them. ’

’ No, I choose me. ’

’ We’re adults, we’re going to fight. ’

’ Everyone said I was ready. You said I would be okay, so I thought I should just do it and get it over with. But I wasn’t ready for…to be… ’

’ I met a puppy once that was half German Shepherd, half teacup Chihuahua. And all I could think was…how did you happen? ’

’ You should go. Cause I’m about to nut punch you. ’

’ Found it. It’s so old, it’s not even in the computer. ’

’ I wasn’t sure what you’d be in the mood for, so I kind of got everything. Champagne, tequila, pinot noir — pick your poison. ’

’ You are not a person who makes promises he doesn’t keep. ’

‘ I only dance it out when something bad’s happened. ’

‘ People aren’t always who you think they are. You learn to see through it. You learn fast. ’

‘ You’re a surgeon, we make mistakes. We need to be forgiven. ’

‘ You don’t teach by shoving someone else’s face in the dirt. That’s just being mean. And small. ’

‘ Did he say anything to you before you killed him? Can you tell me what his last words were. ’

‘ I’m happy and I never thought I would be again. But I am, and that’s all I need. ’

‘ Aw sweetie, this is about me, this isn’t about you. ’

‘ THIS is what feminism looks like, sir. ’

‘ I think you’ll be a good dad. Your babies will be so foul-mouthed and dirty and cute. ’

‘ I am qualified to tell you how to survive. ’

‘ My husband is dead. Yeah, I’m gonna play that card. ’

‘ Why do people constantly feel the need to kill their arteries. ’

‘ Optimism for the win. ’

‘ I told you to keep that baby in. ’

‘ All my orgasms are gonna be self-made, hand-crafted ones. ’

‘ Just because we can live without something, it doesn’t mean we have to. ’

‘ You want to be a mess, be a mess. I don’t care, I can take it. ’

‘ I just got here. I haven’t had a chance to screw anything up yet. ’

‘ Maybe you’ll get lucky and you’ll snip out the part that makes her kinda bitchy. ’

‘ It’s her song, so get off the stage and let her sing it. ’

‘  I love you in a really really big, pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. ‘

‘ I’m not good at relationships or talking about stupid feelings. ’

‘ I’m still in love with you. I tried not to be, but it didn’t work. ’

‘  You’re my sister, you’re my family, you’re all I’ve got. ‘

‘ Everyone needs help from time to time. Someone to look out for them. Make sure they’re okay. ’

‘ There comes a point when you have to suck it up and stop whining and start living. ‘

‘ You died in my arms. You freakin’ died. ’

‘ That’s where love exists. In delusional fantasies. ’

‘ Ah, tonight I have things planned that don’t include her screaming your name. ’

‘ I take things personally. I get too emotional. ’

[drgrcy-blog]

lexie

         the sounds of the wooden door being pushed open the woman, who in many eyes, was lucky to be alive let her tired eyes open. her honest attempt at sleeping proved to be futile, but faking sleep as to doge the looks from other surgeons had proved itself useful. before she could close her eyes once again as to hide in a fake slumber, her eyes caught hold of those of her sister. the unconscious attempt attempt to open her mouth to speak brought the reality of her injuries back to light. jaw wired shut, arm in a cast. all on top of other internal injuries. all of which made her begin to think and wonder how she had even make it out alive. but in this moment, what she wanted, what she wished she could say, was that she was okay. to give her little sister reassurance that she was not going to die. not yet anyways. 

[drgrcy-blog]

little sister

     ❛❛ a-accident. big, big accident. they need you in trauma room two. and meredith.. d-dad. part of the accident. not.. n o t good. ❜❜

        DAD? ‘ wait. lexie stop. back up. dad was in an accident? ’ meredith stood before her sister in complete and utter shock. she had never been close to her dad, but never would meredith ever wish something this severe and ad to happen to the man. after all, he did give her a pretty great little sister. ‘ what accident, lexie? ’

[drgrcy-blog]

april kepner

                      “i just want to go home with her.  i don’t care if i don’t have any of this situated and i have no idea who’s going to help me.  i just want to take her home and sing her to sleep without it being through an ipad.  the wound therapy  ––  it has to work quickly,  mer.”

           ‘ i know ’ maybe it was the fact she, herself, was a mother. a mother that had to have an anything but a picture-perfect delivery for both of her babies. deliveries which threatened both her life and the lives of her two youngest. maybe it was that which made meredith more understanding to april and more willing to be on her side. or maybe it was the fact that she really did like april, more than just as a co-worker but as a close friend – even if mereidth was horrible at showing it from time to time. ‘ but it will. trust me. it feels like it takes ages and feels worse. but it will be worth it. and you will be able to hold harriet and do all the things you dreamed of doing. just, you have to rest. and i am not going to start the same speech i give every other patient that wants to rush recovery because i know you know. but if i have to –– i will. ’