my fucking name, jenkins

Jordyn || 23 || she/her || 🏳️‍🌈 || NZ || I'm a returning tumblr veteran do I get a senior shitpost discount

[sci-fi-gifs]

The Fifth Element dir. Luc Besson | 1997

[mellowmaidenhairs]

and once a year i get obsessed with the show that got ingrained into my brain when i was 14

[nacecye]

stolen century era lucretia my beloved 🤍

( click for better quality :)

[whoznoah]

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes only to turn around and to your horror: the pot.

[weaselle]

caught by surprise by this narrative, call that a pot twist

[demogorgon]

sinners: how real stories of irish and choctaw oppression inform the film

[ambermere-deactivated20260408]

Needs to be said more!

[batshit-auspol]

Did you see that guy who did a shoey in Parliament?

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZNdh7VknA/

So for our international followers, this week's Batshit Moment in Australian politics is awarded to Kyle McGinn, a politician who capped off his farewell speech in the West Australian Senate by drinking a shoey - i.e. the Australian tradition of pouring a beer into your shoe then drinking it.

To quote WA Today: "Some members laughed and applauded while others recoiled as the mulleted politician downed the beer."

Kyle also used his final speech to call out Chevron for not paying its share of tax in Australia, and talked about his struggles with mental health, encouraging men who are having issues with anxiety or depression to talk to others rather than trying to put on a brave face.

All in all sounds like a loss for parliament.

[carouselshotgun]

exposure check for michael b. jordan (smoke and stack)

source - joshcourt

[fandomsnstuff]

It's May 30th so you know what that means

I've written an absurd amount so here's a select few of my favourites for your persual

Blupjeans week 2023 - 11k

This is for Julia - 2.1k

Magnus doesnt understand why his friends want to spend Candlenights killing some guy, but he's happy to come along for the ride

my castle's crumbling down - 2k

It's been months since Lup's kingdom was taken over by Governor Kalen and she was taken captive. It seems he's finally decided that today will be her last.

dreaming, instead of sleeping - 1.2k

Can a dream be recurring if it's different every time?

call me babe for the weekend (tis the damn season) - 3.1k

Barry's mom has been absolutely relentless ever since she found out he's romantically interested in someone, especially now that Christmas is coming up. Lup has a plan to make her stop.

Everybody here was someone else before - 5.1k

Angus, despite being part of it, doesn't trust the Bureau of Balance. There's something strange going on here, and he's going to get to the bottom of it.

aka: Angus figures everything out and fucks up Lucretia's whole Thing

Of course, you're also free to just look at my AO3 and see if something strikes your fancy

Anyway happy blupjeans week, I hope everyone's having fun and in my mind everything posted for it today is for Me, Specifically

[fandomsnstuff]

I'm 25 today! Here are a few additions to this list if the spirit moves you to give me the delicious gift of a comment on ao3

Bottle it up, Hide it away (Blupjeans week 2025) - 5/7 - 10.2k/13.2k

Barry's lost absolutely everything. His mother, his home, and his title have all been ripped away from him. There's an enticing bounty out for his head, and he's on the run. Just when he thinks he's done for, he stumbles across a cottage hidden in the woods that houses a witch and her young daughter. They're kind enough to take him in, and his life, somehow, gets better.

invisible string (tying you to me) - 2.4k

It was the most fun Barry had ever had in school. He finally had real, actual friends who wanted to be around him and play games and talk about the things he liked. Sometimes, the twins would sit on either side of him as he read a book out loud. They said he was a very good reader.

Then, one day, they just vanished. - Barry met his best friends in elementary school, and then a few more times after that.

I See The Light - 12/12 - 20.2k

What would happen if you took Tangled (2010) and made the prologue a little more convoluted, took out the princess romance, and turned both Flynn Rider and the hyper intelligent horse into middle aged gay men who may or may not have a thing going on?

Well, dear reader, why don't we find out together?

As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be - 2/2 - 7.3k

Lilliana Bluejeans is missing. Her soul disappeared from Faerun and no one could find her. It’s been a year since then, and that luck is about to change.

An au of an au of an au

[fandomsnstuff]

It's May 30th so you know what that means

I've written an absurd amount so here's a select few of my favourites for your persual

Blupjeans week 2023 - 11k

This is for Julia - 2.1k

Magnus doesnt understand why his friends want to spend Candlenights killing some guy, but he's happy to come along for the ride

my castle's crumbling down - 2k

It's been months since Lup's kingdom was taken over by Governor Kalen and she was taken captive. It seems he's finally decided that today will be her last.

dreaming, instead of sleeping - 1.2k

Can a dream be recurring if it's different every time?

call me babe for the weekend (tis the damn season) - 3.1k

Barry's mom has been absolutely relentless ever since she found out he's romantically interested in someone, especially now that Christmas is coming up. Lup has a plan to make her stop.

Everybody here was someone else before - 5.1k

Angus, despite being part of it, doesn't trust the Bureau of Balance. There's something strange going on here, and he's going to get to the bottom of it.

aka: Angus figures everything out and fucks up Lucretia's whole Thing

Of course, you're also free to just look at my AO3 and see if something strikes your fancy

Anyway happy blupjeans week, I hope everyone's having fun and in my mind everything posted for it today is for Me, Specifically

[fandomsnstuff]

I'm 25 today! Here are a few additions to this list if the spirit moves you to give me the delicious gift of a comment on ao3

Bottle it up, Hide it away (Blupjeans week 2025) - 5/7 - 10.2k/13.2k

Barry's lost absolutely everything. His mother, his home, and his title have all been ripped away from him. There's an enticing bounty out for his head, and he's on the run. Just when he thinks he's done for, he stumbles across a cottage hidden in the woods that houses a witch and her young daughter. They're kind enough to take him in, and his life, somehow, gets better.

invisible string (tying you to me) - 2.4k

It was the most fun Barry had ever had in school. He finally had real, actual friends who wanted to be around him and play games and talk about the things he liked. Sometimes, the twins would sit on either side of him as he read a book out loud. They said he was a very good reader.

Then, one day, they just vanished. - Barry met his best friends in elementary school, and then a few more times after that.

I See The Light - 12/12 - 20.2k

What would happen if you took Tangled (2010) and made the prologue a little more convoluted, took out the princess romance, and turned both Flynn Rider and the hyper intelligent horse into middle aged gay men who may or may not have a thing going on?

Well, dear reader, why don't we find out together?

As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be - 2/2 - 7.3k

Lilliana Bluejeans is missing. Her soul disappeared from Faerun and no one could find her. It’s been a year since then, and that luck is about to change.

An au of an au of an au

[amazoogle]

[thatssomanda]

My brother saved this document and everytime he gets angry at our neighbours for being loud he prints it to their wireless printer and you can hear the wife shout “Why the fuck would you print this AGAIN?!” to her son.

[auntytimblr-deactivated20150403]

every time we serve chicken at work i think of this post

[gallusrostromegalus]

1.  If you were wondering, you can type the numbers in the works cited into google and they appear to be medical journal articles about using medical imaging to detect and diagnose a rare form of Gastritis.

2. Please enjoy the offical powerpoint presentation of this paper at an academic conference by the original author, complete with Q&A:

[zillyirk32]

THIS IS GOLD

[aprillikesthings]

oh m god please watch the video it’s some of the most contagious laughter on the planet

[artikgato]

When I saw this cross my dash tonight, I smiled and thought “yess, the chicken chicken chicken post, I get to reblog it again and inflict it on all of the people that have followed me since last time”, and then I scrolled down more and to my utter delight there was A VIDEO, needless to say my night has been made

[eliciaforever-deactivated201906]

I HAVE NOT SEEN THE CHICKEN VIDEO IN TEN DAMN YEARS HOLY SHIT

STILL FUNNY

[ruelukas22]

The bell

The last question

The woman howling in laughter 90% of the time

It’s all beautiful

It’s all

So beautiful

[explorerrowan]

I love that he was absolutely 100% prepared for a question in chickenese.

[caterinas80]

“I do not feel capable summarizing this article”

Same

[sha-brytols]

[magpie-reads]

Short Story Recommendations

These all fuck me up to a varying degree of emotions

Crime

Philomel Cottage - Agatha Christie

Lamb to the Slaughter - Roald Dahl

Death and the Compass - Jorge Luis Borges

Horror

The Landlady - Roald Dahl

A Walk in the Dark - Arthur C Clarke

The Wife’s Story - Ursula K Le Guin

The Veldt - Ray Bradbury

The Hanging Stranger - Philip K Dick

The Colour out of Space - H P Lovecraft

The Spider - Hanns Heinz Ewers

Sad

The Life You Save May Be Your Own - Flannery O’Connor

A Small, Good Thing - Raymond Carver

Cathedral - Raymond Carver

The Haunted Boy - Carson McCullers

The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas - Ursula K. Le Guin

The Chef - Andy Weir

The Martyr - Ngugi Wa Thiong’o

Jambula Tree - Monica Arak de Nyeko

The Rats Do Sleep At Night - Wolfgang Borchert

Sci-Fi

Love is the Plan the Plan is Death - James Tiptree Jr

The Last Question - Isaac Asimov

The Nine Billion Names of God - Arthur C Clarke

The Star - Arthur C Clarke

Reunion - Arthur C Clarke

The Commuter - Philip K Dick

Exhibit Piece - Philip K Dick

To Serve Man - Damon Knight

Brothers Beyond the Void - Paul W Fairman

What the Fuck?! 

The Lottery - Shirley Jackson

A Collapse of Horses - Brian Evenson

Some of Us Had Been Threatening Our Friend Colby - Donald Barthelme

Hopeful Monsters - Hiromi Goto

The Box Social - James Reaney

He-y come on ou-t - shinichi hoshi

The Garden of Forking Paths - Jorge Luis Borges

Stories of Your Life and Others - Ted Chiang (just the entire collection bro)

Other

Broken Routine - Jeffrey Archer

A Man Who Had No Eyes - Mackinlay Kantor

Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been - Joyce Carol Oates

The Lady, or the Tiger - Frank R Stockton

The Continuity of Parks - Julio Cortázar

The Dinner Party - Mona Gardner

A Very Old Man with Enormous Wings - Gabriel García Márquez

On Exactitude in Science - Jorge Luis Borges

[rosenkranz-does-things]

Sinners studies in heavypaint

[innerchildabortionclinic]

the quiet misogyny of American Psycho

I mean i'd personally say it's a bit more loud. There was a chainsaw for example

[thecreechercatalog]

Ripley & Jonesy

Alien (1979)

[unexplained-events]

Paintings by John Brosio

[klaxonsynth]

i was waiting until i had more psych art to post this along with but it never happened so here's the lassie i've been holding hostage