See ya later mash potato

a little bit less human everyday

[bofadibeppo]

What just happened here

[iguanamouth]

so anyway

[frogmp3]

ladies don’t forget to fill up your water bottle and put it in the fridge before you go to bed tonight so you can have a drink as soon as you wake up tomorrow. men you can die i guess

[srzei]

The last part is absolutely toxic. Imagine reversing the gender in this post and what the reaction be then.

[frogmp3]

imagine if lightbulbs tasted like hot dogs. it’s not relevant and it doesn’t matter

[dumbhoez]

How I feel at school.

[dumbhoez]

I feel so sad and alone :(.

[dumbhoez]

would you date a fan?

Whomst

[thepakistanimarthastewart-deact]

[lividlovers]

Seriously

[ladyjadey]

[chainsawpunk]

wow she really can play any role

[bruisemark]

She thicc

Thoughtful Honest Interesting Caring Compassionate

[bodyglitter]

me: yeah im done crying over this lol its not even worth my tears

me 3 seconds later:

[kailysander]

[skzhhssh-deactivated20190330]

can you believe female hysteria was considered like an actual medical thing… god

[skzhhssh-deactivated20190330]

mary louise moneybags in 1880: im horny all the time and also sad and i feel dissatisfied with my shitty life i dont want kids i hate my dad and my husband

dr mis o’geny: i diagnose you with WOMAN

[mrbulian]

[trans-mouse]

This is the funniest thing I’ve seen in weeks. Literally, I’ve never been this funny in my entire goddamn life

[cmyknoise]

a gem, this is a god damn gem

[the90swerentreal]

[the-man-who-sold-za-warudo]

why does wiggly sword exist? What are they good for?

Skill: Shows off the blacksmiths massive horse cock. In a time before modern machinery some crazy Germans and Swiss hammered beyond natural human limit. They probably did it as a meme then realised it was actually useful as a weapon. Sharpening a wavy blade would have been a nightmare.

Functional: Good for duelling sword vs sword. A traditional sword allows you to slide off an enemies blade if your swords clash, because the blade is straight. The waves in a flamberg blade creates vibrations which hurts the opponents hands, that doesn’t sound like much but it gives you an advantage. Very useful for parrying since the enemies sword will strike, then the blade gets stuck on your wavy blade or they pull away from the impact shock. Either way you will have an opening to attack. Also the waves cut much deeper similar to a serrated knife. If you got cut once by this blade, you would not be able to stitch your wound shut, you are pretty much sliced bread.Aesthetic: Someone challenges you to a duel, while they unsheathe their boring longsword, you unwrap your wiggly sword. They immediately apologize and run because you are rich enough to afford a wiggly sword and probably have multiple wenches giving you ankle parchments.

[your-favourite-problem-deactiva]

Me: The stars are beautiful tonight.

Significant other: Yeah.

Me: You know what else is beautiful?

Significant other: *blushes* What?

Me: Bill Skarsgård.

[jasvvy]

[throwbackblr]

Me when the Costco sample lady put out some fresh bagel bites