'SUP

25 | PNW | Non-Binary

[dumbt1redgremlin]

Got termed, used to be dvmbtiredgremlin :/

Just not gonna post w tags again, it's funny being termed feels like I lost all my progress, urge to lock in be strong today.

Stats:

Sw 170lbs

Cw 145

Gw1 135 - hair dye

Gw2 130 - new mirror and bc

Gw3 125 - new bed cover

Gw4 120 - haircut and bc

Gw5 110 - new clothes

Ugw 100ish

Non-binary, started T on 4/3/25

Bipolar, OCD, autism. All diagnosed professionally. (Not a surprise to me or my family tbh)

No transphobes, homophobes, racists. Just be nice pls

New BMR on T is 1400, so far. Gonna stay under that with the absolute limit of 1k.

[officeshelpdesk]

由于中国世纪已经到来，我现在只会用（可能写得不太好的）简化汉语来发帖。

[officeshelpdesk]

有一天，我们都会回首往事，大笑起来，不过，我们会以一种明显的中国方式大笑。

[officeshelpdesk]

当有人谋杀“South African Pedophile Hitler”时，我会回去用英语发帖

[toua-auot]

Language barrier be dammed

[dumbt1redgremlin]

God I love Celsius please make me the mascot ill be like Mr clean but with thick hair and nails pumped full of so much biotin

[dumbt1redgremlin]

Hit 156! Considering I've been at 160+ after "recovery" feels good to see 15- (still hate it, especially since I saw a pic of my 125 body from a little over a year ago >:( )

[dumbt1redgremlin]

Alright we're failing at everything else... pray I don't quit today 🙏

(Job pays literal minimum wage, I dont like what I'm doing and dreading going in every day, would quit rn but have nothing lined up. Not dire, I just like having backup)

I'll put in interviews later today to keep me sane

[dumbt1redgremlin]

I'm back!

Depression Eating won, was much happier when I had everything under control so here I am!

[twinsfawn]

anyone else feel like there will always be a veil of separation between them and the rest of the world and that they’ll never actually be understood or is that just me

[dumbt1redgremlin]

Okay I'll let y'all decide...

Theres a man (yes, a man, I have my hesitations but hear me out)

Hes saying all the right things, he's giving off a good vibe, almost everything is perfect and yet...

Its too tooooooo perfect. It's like he's in my brain. Weird level perfection.

Should I give him a chance?

I've known myself as ace for so long, the specificity of his convos seems fake, , there's no way he's real....

should I?

ye

nah

do whatever you want bih

Voting ended onJan 24

I feel like Liz lemon in that one episode of 30 rock where her best friends set up a perfect date for her... but I don't have those kind of friends where this could happen

[dumbt1redgremlin]

Yay testosterone!

Been eating like a fucking golden retriever lately, so scared of the scale, finally got on....

Didn't gain a pound.

Like shit you not 5 small meals a day, lots of rice n eggs, muscle still there (it seems anyway), I honestly don't get how just a lil hormone changes so much.

[dumbt1redgremlin]

I feel like such a faker while eating the sausage patty mcmuffin thing from the market next to my work but like, I 100% burn it off by the end of my shift and barely eat dinner. I think I average about 12-14k steps at work which is like 800c most days.

Hardware store/physical labor for the win.

[cixousphere]

i really hate explaining ocd to ppl and how it has effectively and irreparably destroyed my entire life bc they're always just like "haha germs"

[dumbt1redgremlin]

Taking a break from w3igh8ng and counting Cs since obv that's not the s3lf h4rm I crave,,,, I crave to live.

To experience, to feel, to remember what life is about outside of my stupid lil head.

I've been waking up wanting to throw myself off the aurora bridge (pnw peep wya).

I've been good, I've been off social media, I've taken hella walks every single day, I've eaten healthy, gotten medicated, taken supplements, fucking everything everybody has recommended for a better mindset. Basically anything besides going into bottomless debt trying to navigate the "mental health machine" NIGHTMARE that is the US health system.

This is now a "fuck it, we ball" space. Open to everyone. That's ballin'.

[satanfemme]

you've gotta be kind to yourself no matter what

[satanfemme]

this is twice as true in the winter

[satanfemme]

the world isn't ending and you don't need to kill yourself it's literally december. it's december. and you need to be nice to yourself.

[kincaidz3r0]

Needed this today I was unironically on the fucking edge all day

[dumbt1redgremlin]

You don't gotta reblog or like this if you don't want to, but this a post letting people know that this blog, me, another human being, would like people to interact with me in the lowkey-est of forms. Tell me your favourite swear word. Tell me the weather in your city. Let me know a little win or big blunder. Say you hate me. Anything.

The community we're in might not be the biggest, or the most popular, it might not even be accepted by most people. But the people here are still human, and as much as we say we like the loneliness, our stupid flesh sacks and meat slab still crave connection.

[emilybraydenblogs]

I confuse people. i have a happy personality and a sad soul. i'm bold but shy. i love deeply but sometimes i feel heartless. i'm healing and hurting at the same time. i'm dedicated to growth, but i self sabotage

[kosmogrl]

[kosmogrl]

but this is kinda good cause honestly I don’t need to know all of that

[dumbt1redgremlin]

Finally in the 140s !!!

Cheat day tomorrow, which works out perfect since I'm going to the mall for presents, I usually get like 30k steps and burn about 3kc so I won't feel too bad about eating my favs.

Shout out to health anxiety and holiday family resentments, really helps curb an appetite.