d i v i n e

𝙬𝙚     𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙     𝙗𝙚     𝒽𝑒𝓇𝑜𝑒𝓈     𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝     𝚏𝚘𝚛     𝚘𝚗𝚎     𝒹𝒶𝓎.

[dvnities-a]

welcome to  𝐃𝐕𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒 , a multimuse with canons and ocs from a variety of media   —   written by leah

muses     ,     doc     ,      full navigation

[dvnities-a]

𝙵𝙸𝙻𝙴 : 𝚁𝙾𝙼𝙰𝙽𝙾𝚅𝙰 , 𝙽.

PLAYING   OVER   AND   OVER,      a   broken   record   in   her   head               ———               a   mosaic   of   events   that   led   up   to   this,   whatever     this     was.   she   could   remind   herself   of   the   times   everything     hurt,     where   just   breathing   felt   like   too   much   to   do   for   her   crippled   lungs   or   taking   the   first   steps   felt   as   if   the   world   would   crumble   under   her   weight.         or   she’d   crumble   entirely. SOMETHING   WAS   WRONG,     she   was   wrong,   this   was   all     wrong.     incoherent   thoughts   bustling   in   her   cranium,   a   new   type   of   numbness   filling   her   body   and   yet   she   could   feel   everything   as   if   it   were   for   the   first   time               ———               only   doused   in   thorns   and   flames.       it   burned.

gaze   flickered   towards   the   moving   figure,      familiar   head   of   blonde.         steve?      the   name   rested   on   the   tip   of   her   tongue,   eyes   squinting   to   focus   on   him.      where   was   clint   ?      did   they   get   the   stone   ?      a   million   questions   building   up   within   her   and   it   wasn’t   until   her     name     fell   from   his   lips   and   she   was   in   his   arms   that   she   could   convince   herself   it   wasn’t   some   twisted   nightmare.   nothing   like   the     METHODS   OF   TORTURE     she’d   been   expecting.   it   wasn’t   some   game,   it   wasn’t   meant   to   break   her.      but   wasn’t   she   supposed   to   be   broken     already?      clinging   desperately   to   him,   breathing   was   shallow   as   her   knees   inevitably   fell   weak,               “      hey,   steve.      ”               it’s   too     casual   for   such   a   reunion,   but   she   couldn’t   think   of   anything   else.

“      considering   that   i   just   crawled   out   of   some     nightmarecrypt               ———               that   i   never   want   to   think   about   again,      ”               chewing   on   the   inside   of   her   mouth,   gaze   briefly   flickering   from   where   she   came   and   then   back   to   him,   attempting   to   find     solace     in   those   blues,               “      i’m   guessing   vormir.      ”               like   acid   in   her   throat,   she   couldn’t   keep   herself   from   staring   at   what   had   to   have   been   her   blood.     SLOW   HISS   ESCAPED   HER   LIPS,     like   she’d   just   been   reminded,               “      shit       .   .   .      ”               free   hand   reached   up   to   the   back   of   her   head,   feeling   for   where   the   impact   must   have   been,   and   though   she   couldn’t   feel   anything   externally,   there   was   an   ache   she   was   certain   would     never     leave.               “      what   are   you   doing   here   ?      did   clint   not   make   it   back   ?      were   you   guys   able   to   get   the   stones   ?      ”

a   voice   leaves   her   lips   and   any   FEAR   that   he   had   that   this   wouldn’t   work   is   washed   away   by   a   renewed   hope,   the   comfort   that   the   person   standing   before   him   was   the   very   same   that   everyone   had   lost.   he   knew   what   it   was   like   to   lose   men,   𝐭𝐨   𝐬𝐞𝐞   𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐬   𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥   𝐢𝐧   𝐭𝐡𝐞   𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐝   and   to   lose   lives   that   you   couldn’t   save,   no   matter   how   hard   you   tried.   they   all   made   a   dent.   steve   had   been   on   his   own   since   he   was   eighteen   and   the   one   thing   he   had   learned   was   that   losing   family   never   got   easier.   losing   people   was   never   without   grief. 

he   takes   a   few   seconds   to   survey   the   space   behind   her,   waiting   with   held   breath   to   see   if   anything   would   climb   out   after   her.   𝐀𝐋𝐋   𝐇𝐄   𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐒   𝐈𝐒   𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐃   but   it   whips   against   his   skin   harsher   than   he’s   ever   felt   before.   it’s   different   here,   somehow   more   suffocating   than   it   was   back   HOME.   only   once   he   knows   they’re   safe   does   he   allow   for   himself   to   laugh   gently,   the   concern   never   quite   leaving   his   brow,   “   take   it   easy,   romanoff.   ”   she   had   climbed   out   of   a   grave,   he   didn’t   want   her   to   push   herself   into   further   exhaustion.

clint.   the   stones.   in   a   weird   way,   all   of   that   feels   a   hundred   years   old.   the   world   was   changed   forever,   𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐃   in   a   way   that   it   had   never   been   before,   and   he   thought   that,   heroes   or   not,   they   were   too.   he   looks   down,   sharing   news   of   the   fallen   had   never   been   an   easy   task.   “   clint’s   SAFE,   don’t   worry.   there’s   a   lot   that   i   need   to   catch   you   up   on,   but   we   did   it.   we   made   things   right,   we   brought   everyone   back.   ”   he   wishes   the   news   could   be   delivered   with   a   smile,   “   tony   he.   .   .   ”   a   lump   forms,   “   𝐡𝐞   𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧’𝐭   𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞   𝐢𝐭.   his   sacrifice   saved   the   world   and   he   KNEW   what   he   was   doing   but,   ”   frown   deepens,   “   that   doesn’t   mean   that   i   don’t   wish   it   was   different.   i’m   sorry,   nat.   ”

[dvnities-a]

𝔯𝔢𝔠𝔬𝔯𝔡 𝔰𝔥𝔬𝔭 𝔤𝔦𝔯𝔩.

▷     𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘   𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐊    :     𝐏𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘   ( feat. @dvnities​​​    ,   marcus )

good  thing  bud  didn’t  subject  her  to  capitalistic  slavery.  the  closing  shifts  were  hers,  which  was  totally  cool  considering  she  was  not  a  morning  person  in  the  slightest.  plus,  he  only  had  three  rules:  sell  records,  don’t  leave  the  store  unattended  and  replace  whatever  bud  you  burn.  if  it  had  been  slow  for  long  enough,  she  was  free  to  lock  up  and  leave  which  was  exactly  what  she  did  after  hurrying  some  stranglers  out.  (  here  becca   and  ashley,  take  this  queen  album,  you’ll  probably  love  it  or  the  very  least  it’ll  look  so  cute  on  your  shelf  for  your  instagram  pictures  and  you’ll  never  actually  listen  to  it.  cool.  leave.  byeeee.  )

all  she  cared  about  was  getting  to  the  comic  book  store  before  it  closed  and  before  some  sticky  fingered  twerp  stole  the  comics  she  had  stashed  away.  you  don’t  know  true  pain  until  you  finally  find  the  issue  you’ve  been  dying  for  only  to  find  your  pockets  empty  and  your  bank  account  dry.  so  the  plan  was  to  stash  them  away  underneath  the  $1  boxes  in  hopes  she  could  snag  them  after  her  next  paycheck  hit.  but  they  were  gone.  every.  single.  one  of  them.  gone.  “  no  fucking  way.  ”  children  laugh  and  even  if  it  has  nothing  to  do  with  her,  they’re  mocking  her.  

lips  purse,  her  eyes  darting  to  the  guy  at  the  counter.  they  had  created  sort  of  a  bond  between  whiteboard  messages  and  salutatory  waves,  so  there’s  a  63%  chance  he  might  have  her  back.  “  yo,  ”  chin  jerks  up,  fingers  tapping  gently  on  the  counter  to  get  his  attention.  “  i’ve  got  ten  bucks  with  your  name  on  it  if  you  tell  me  which  one  of  these  snot  nosed  turds  stole  my  comics.  ”  

why   the   sticky,   obnoxious,   SLIMY   kids   felt   the   need   to   come   barreling   through   the   doors   of   the   comic   book   shop   every   single   day   and   stay   there   until   CLOSING   was   beyond   him.   he   thought   that   they   had   to   have   better   things   to   do,   and   quite   frankly,   he   didn’t   really   care   what   it   was,   just   as   long   as   they   were   harassing   someone   else   instead   of   him.   their   constant   whining   was   the   worst   of   it,   complaining   about   the   stock,   begging   for   him   to   magically   procure   the   𝚖𝚘𝚜𝚝   𝚕𝚒𝚖𝚒𝚝𝚎𝚍   𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗   volumes   of   every   comic   ever   created.   he   was   about   one   headache   away   from   just   telling   them   to   piss   off   and   pirate   it.

when   someone   above   the   age   of   8   opens   the   door,   his   lips   twitch   ever   so   slightly   upon   seeing   that   it’s   the   girl   from   the   record   store   who   he’s   communicated   with   briefly   before.   if   the   SYSTEM   they   had   going   on   could   even   be   considered   communicating.   shifting   on   the   stool   he   watches   as   the   kids   laugh   and   eyes   narrow   as   he   shoots   them   a   glare.   it’s   enough   to   get   most   of   them   to   𝚂𝙲𝚁𝙰𝙼𝙱𝙻𝙴   𝙾𝚄𝚃   𝚃𝙷𝙴   𝙳𝙾𝙾𝚁,   knowing   that   if   they   stay   any   longer   marcus   will   be   on   their   ass   to   pack   up   their   shit   and   go.   gaze   snaps   over   to   the   girl   and   he   lazily   hops   up,   “   they’re   the   fucking   worst,   aren’t   they   ?   ” 

marcus   hears   a   high   pitched   shout   from   a   snotty   kid   named   TIMMY   and   he   flashes   him   another   pointed   look,   only   refocusing   his   gaze   one   he   can   see   the   bell   above   the   door   jingling.   he   reaches   under   the   counter,   plopping   a   small   stack   on   top,   “   𝙽𝙾𝙽𝙴   𝙾𝙵   𝙴𝙼.   ”   there’s   a   light   shrug,   “   i   saw   you   hide   them   but   they   didn’t   stand   a   chance   if   they   were   left   there.   i   swear   to   god   they’ll   get   their   grubby   hands   on   all   the   good   shit   even   when   hell   freezes   over.   so,   ”   he   grins,   “   i   told   them   they   were   outta   stock   and   HOPED   you   came   back   for   them.   ”   leaning   against   the   counter,   he   outstretches   his   hand,   offering   his   palm,   “   still   gonna   give   me   that   ten   bucks   ?   ”

[evermore-fashion]

Paolo Sebastian ‘Persephone’ Spring 2021 Haute Couture Collection

[dvnities-a]

𝔞𝔲𝔡𝔯𝔢𝔶.

another  spiteful  word  or  another  sip  of  her  drink?  one  would  eventually  run  out  before  the  other  and  her  bets  were  on  the  alcohol.  so,  might  as  well  enjoy  it  while  it  lasts.  brows  crinkle  and  then  raise  as  she  lets  the  liquor  run  past  her  throat                      not  from  any  burn  of  liquor,  but  from  the  sting  of  his  words.  anything  she  did,  he  was  just  ready  to  pounce  on  her  and  knock  her  down.  plastic,  self-absorbed,  sheep                     none  of  these  were  new.  but  the  m  -  word.  weakness  was  beat  out  of  her  long  ago,  yet  there’s  an  m  -  word  shaped  hole  in  her  soul.  perhaps  if  it  were  filled,  she  would  be  all  around  softer,  kinder,  more  prone  baking  cookies  than  baking  in  a  basement  full  of  people  that  didn’t  truly  know  her  and  would  kill  her  if  given  the  opportunity.  [  everyone  is  a  threat.  even  those  you  least  expected.  always  keep  your  guard  up.  do  not  let  them  know  who  you  really  are.  ]  

“  my  mother  is  dead,  dipshit.  ”  and  her  father  nonexistent,  but  marcus  would  find  a  way  to  turn  that  into  being  her  fault.  (  her  grandmother  did.  in  her  cold  eyes,  having  a  daughter  had  made  her  parents  soft,  vulnerable  and  blind.  she  was  a  liability.  )  “  so  all  you’re  proving  is  that  you’re  not  as  smart  or  perceptive  or  clever  as  you  pretend  to  be,  freud.  and  that’ll  get  you  killed.  you  don’t  know  me.  i’m  just  a  projection  of  everything  you’re  angry  at  in  the  world  and  you  think  you  can  take  it  out  on  me.  it’s  not  going  to  make  anything  better  for  you.  you’re  just  further  alienating  yourself  by  being  an  asshole  that  no  one  wants  to  be  around  and  in  turn,  making  more  things,  more  people,  for  you  to  hate.  ”

another  spiteful  word  called  for  another  drink.  “  and  being  loud  and  confident  in  your  wrong,  hateful  opinions  doesn’t  make  you  right.  ”  lips  pull  into  a  tight  smile.  “  so  if  you  really  want  to  hurt  my  feelings,  try  again.  or,  better  yet  you  can  go  hang  out  with  brandy  and  her  band  of  hillbillies  that  also  have  loud,  hateful  and  wrong  opinions.  i’m  sure  you’d  get  along  very  well.  or  you’ll  piss  them  off  and  they’ll  kick  your  ass.  either  one  works  for  me.  i  so  don’t  care.  ”

“   welcome   to   the   club.   ”   venom   seeps   out,   malice   towards   their   shared   trauma.    dead   mother,   dead   father   —   features   in   his   life   that   had   turned   into   defining   factors.   he   was   labelled   an   orphan,   unlovable   and   broken,   with   eyes   that   swirled   with   a   darkness   that   𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐃   𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐎   𝐅𝐔𝐑𝐘.   he   can   still   feel   the   string   to   the   bright   red   balloon   in   his   hand,   he   can   still   see   the   warm   smile   on   his   mother’s   cheeks   as   she   tossed   a   quarter   to   the   vendor   that   had   waved   them   down.   life   is   not   a   dress   rehearsal   —   his   father’s   voice.   suddenly   the   world   is   doused   in   red,   droplets   drying   on   his   face   as   a   soundtrack   stutters   and   skips   in   his   head.   it’s   their   screams,   twisted   and   cracked   and   broken,   𝚓𝚞𝚜𝚝   𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎   𝚑𝚒𝚖.

tongue   clicks,   head   tilting   as   he   looks   at   her   with   smug   grin,   “   actually   the   majority   of   freudian   theory   has   been   disproven   as   a   pile   of   dogshit,   but   great   attempt.   ”   grip   tightens   around   the   cup,   if   she   thought   her   words   would   make   a   dent   in   him,   she   was   sorely   MISTAKEN.   he’d   heard   it   all   before   from   people   just   like   her,   pretty   and   perfect   and   PRIVILEGED.   in   their   eyes   he   was   a   stain,   a   cancer   in   their   lives   that   metastasized   with   every   breath   he   took.   that’s   𝐚𝐥𝐥   𝐡𝐞   𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝   𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫   𝐛𝐞   and   it’d   be   ignorant   to   think   that   he’d   ever   have   a   chance   at   being   something   more.

“   i   don’t   give   a   shit   what   you   think,   audrey.   i   don’t   care   if   your   feelings   are   hurt.   i   don’t   matter   to   you   and   you   don’t   matter   to   me.   ”   it   was   the   cycle   of   the   universe,   a   pit   they   all   fell   victim   to   in   a   world   where   the   connections   you   made   determined   if   you   LIVED   or   died.   “   no   point   lying   about   it.   ”   finishing   off   his   drink,   he   crumples   the   cup,   tossing   it   in   the   nearest   trash,   “   and   for   the   record,   your   opinions   are   just   as   loud   and   hateful   as   mine.   you’re   not   any   better   than   me   and   it’s   gotta   be   𝐄𝐗𝐇𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆   trying   to   convince   yourself   that   you   are.   ”

[detailedart]

The Knight of the Flowers, 1894, by Georges Rochegrosse. Detail and photo by Paul Perrin. Edit.

[dvnities-a]

𝙵𝙸𝙻𝙴 : 𝚁𝙾𝙼𝙰𝙽𝙾𝚅𝙰 , 𝙽.

A  STARTER  FOR    :    @dvnities​​​

IT’S   NOT   A   COINCIDENCE,         she   could   hear   the   echos   of   her   own   words   seeping   back   in.   was   it   a     dream,     the   way   she   fought   so   badly   for   her   end               ———               or   what   would   have   been   her   new     start?      hands   were   aching   as   she   felt   nothing   but   brittle   bones   scraping   over   the   other,   a   dry   and   lifeless   hand   still   clutching   her   chest.   she   could   see   it   still,   how   much   of   her   life   flashed   before   plunging   to   the   depths.   in   just   those   brief   moments,   she’d   thought   about     LIFE   AND   DEATH.     life   was   fluid,   she’d   said   before,   knowing   they   were   made   up   of   water   and   that,   without   that   precious   liquid,   they   were      nothing.      so   eager   hands   sought   out   for   that   proof   of   life,   but   nothing   about   it   felt   familiar,   nothing   about   it   felt   right.   DUST   AND   DECAY,   the   scent   unwelcoming               ———               she’d   felt   it   before,   only   pushed   so   far   back   in   her   mind   just   to   make   it   through   most   nights.         WHATEVER   IT   TAKES   .   .   .            IF   WE   DON’T   GET   THAT   STONE,   BILLIONS   OF   PEOPLE   STAY   DEAD.

a   short   gasp   escaped,   like   the   first   real   intake   of   breath   had   been     too   much     to   handle.      placed   into   a   world   she   didn’t   belong   in,      her   cheeks   were   wet   with   tears   and   for   just   a   second,   she   wondered   if   it   was     enough     proof   of   her   life.      heart   was   racing,   eyes   fluttering   open   for   the   first   time   and   she   was   met   with   what   must   have   been      HISTORIES   OF   DEATHS,      all   formed   around   her,      a   lifeless   shrine   that   coated   her.   she   was   one   of   them               ———   LET   ME   GO,         pleading,   it   didn’t   hurt   so   much   to   say   it,      IT’S   OKAY.         and   there   was   that   peace   she   once   sought   but   was   never   given.   she’d     accepted     it,   so   why   was   she   back   to   feeling   nothing   but     pain?

it   was   suffocating,   trying   to   move   over   the     PILE   OF   CORPSES     that   rested   below   her.   mind   racing   a   thousand   spins,   thoughts   moving   too     fast.      this   was   nothing   but     primalinstincts     fueling   her.   moving   forward,   but     where?      and   then   she   found   herself   moving   up,   a   crescendo   lifting   her   through   the   ruins   of   what’d   held   her   captive.   she   was   further   from   where   she’d   hit,   but   she   could   see   the   dried   out     POOLS   OF   RED     that   must   have   been     hers.     brows   were   furrowing   as   her   sight   adjusted   to   the   new   light,   muscles     weak     from   their   attempted   steps.   

NATALIA   &   STEVE.

he   was   out   of   his   depth.   he   had   never   UNDERSTOOD   how   quickly   the   world   had   changed   during   the   time   he   was   under   the   ice,   let   alone   anything   after   he   came   out   of   it.   he’d   never   taken   the   time   to   think   about   it.   there   were   lives   to   be   saved   and   WARS   TO   BE   FOUGHT   (   could   he   survive   without   one   ?   )   and   he   had   seen   far   too   many   soldiers   spend   too   much   time   on   the   field   thinking   about   the   why   that   it   got   them   killed.   but   in   the   aftermath,   all   he   had   been   able   to   do   was   THINK.   turns   out,   there   were   a   lot   of   questions   he   had   ---   the   one   he   couldn’t   shake   being   :   was   she   was   still   up   here   ?   ALL   ALONE   and   rotting   ?

as   it   turns   out,   there   was   no   such   thing   as   a   simple   answer   anymore.   there’s   a   new   emptiness   in   him,   A   CAVERN   IN   HIS   CHEST   where   he   knows   something   should   exist   and   his   eyes   are   wet   from   a   loss   he   can’t   place.   he   feels   as   if   he   should   be   grieving,   but   he   doesn’t   know   what   for.   peggy.   his   best   girl.   why   now   ?   why   here   ?   something   tells   him   he’d   never   know.   there’s   a   flash   of   red   and   his   head   snaps   up,   it   was   her.   feet   are   shuffling   before   he   can   think,   breaking   out   into   a   sprint   just   to   reach   her,   to   see   that   she   was   alive,   that   this   was   REAL.

it   doesn’t   feel   possible,   it   shouldn’t   be   possible   but   steve   was   not   in   the   business   of   discussing   the   probability   of   anything.   “   nat.   ”   voice   breaks,   hoarse   and   shaking   as   he   grows   closer.   hands   reach   out,   attempting   to   steady   her,   “   natasha   I’VE   GOT   YOU.   ”   light   eyes   look   her   up   and   down,   scanning   for   injuries   that   might   need   tending,   “   you’re   gonna   be   okay.   do   you   know   where   you’re   at   ?   ”   there’s   still   a   sense   of   DREAD   that’s   spreading   through   him   but   relief   is   bursting   within,   shimmering   so   brightly   he’s   almost   able   not   to   notice   what   he’s   lost.   almost.

[dvnities-a]

𝚊𝚞𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚢.

it  wasn’t  about  you.  it’s  a  pinprick  to  the  most  fragile  part  of  her  ego.  a  reminder  that  those  close  to  her  thought  of  her  as  nothing  more  than  a  self-absorbed  ass  kisser.  even  those  she  held  close  found  ways  to  wiggle  out  of  her  grasp  as  disguise  it  as  something  “   for  the  better  ”.  “  is  that  what  you  think?  ”  hues  narrow,  her  voice  rising,  “  that  i’m  just  some  .  .  .  self  centered  brat  that’s  mad  because  you  left  me?  because  if  that’s  what  you  think,  if  that’s  what  you’ve  always  thought  then  just  say  it,  genevieve.  ”

the  unspoken  apology  might  as  well  have  hit  a  brick  wall.  audrey  stands  across  genevieve,  hands  clenched  into  fists,  thorns  upright  and  ready  to  protect  herself.  “  did  you  find  whatever  you  were  looking  for?  ”  she  flings  the  words  out,  almost  mocking  her.  “  plus,  you  don’t  think  there’s  been  times  where  i  wanted  to  run  away  too?  but  i  couldn’t  because  i               ”  it’s  hard  to  admit,  and  she’s  not  in  the  headspace  to  give  gen  any  kind  of  praise,  but  if  she  was  being  honest  .  .  .  she  wasn’t  as  brave.  “  i  have  a  duty.  here.  ”  she says  it  matter-of-factly,  minimal  emotion  involved.  “  to  my  people.  to  my  family.  to  my  friends.  ”

“  and  you  could’ve  called.  ”  for  a  brief  moment,  she  softens,  hurt  rising  in  amber  hues.  “  if  you  really  missed  me,  you  could’ve  called  or  wrote  me  a  letter  or  something,  instead  of  disappearing  and  making  me  worry  that  something  bad  had  happened  to  you  for  a  year,  gen.  ”  relaxing  her  hands,  audrey  folds  her  arms  across  her  stomach  and  shrugs,  “  i  wouldn’t  have  told  anyone.  ”

“   did   i   say   that   ?   ”   tone   is   dry,   expression   unblinking,   forcing   down   any   annoyance   that   her   words   are   being   taken   out   of   context,   spun   against   her.   “   the   answer   is   NO,   i   didn’t   because   i   don’t   think   that,   but   i’m   not   gonna   sit   and   argue   with   something   that   you’ve   already   convinced   yourself   is   true.    ”   genevieve   scoffs,   tongue   running   across   her   teeth   as   she   nods   slowly,   “   oh   so   that’s   how   it   is.   okay,   ”   she   takes   a   moment   to   clear   her   throat,   using   the   brief   flicker   of   silence   to   attempt   to   formulate   her   thoughts.

“   look,   i   get   it,   you’re   lashing   out   because   you’re   HURT.   yes,   i   made   a   choice   that   resulted   in   a   shift   of   my   duties.   don’t   act   like   you’re   better   than   me   because   i   did.   ”   she   rolls   her   eyes,   trying   not   to   act   like   it   bothered   her.   she   wanted   to   believe   it   didn’t,   but   it   does,   if   only   because   she   knows   the   WHOLE   WORLD   is   thinking   the   same   thing.   “   i   don’t   think   you’re   a   self   centered   brat,   but   this   holier   than   thou   shit   you’re   doing   right   now   ?   not   the   answer.   that’s   the   type   of   behavior   that   will   make   people   think   you   are   one.   ”

she   shoots   her   a   pointed   look,   brow   quirking,   “   you   wouldn’t   have   told   chad   ?   ”   she   had   a   hard   time   believing   it   wouldn’t   have   slipped   out,   even   if   it   were   an   accident.   “   besides,   i   couldn’t.   i   would   have   come   running   back   as   soon   as   i   started   writing   or   heard   your   voice.   i   would   have   accepted   the   crown,   taken   the   throne.   it   all   would   have   been   for   NOTHING   and   i   would   have   never   been   happy.   ”   she   looks   down,   “   and   it   wasn’t   all   sunshine   and   roses.   bad   things   did   happen.   the   world   is   different   from   the   one   we’ve   grown   up   in.   i   didn’t   need   to   make   anyone   worry   MORE.   ”

[dvnities-a]

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚍.

“      listen,   SIS,      ”               the   title   was   spewed   out   in   a   sneer,   the   toxins   thick   in   his   tone               ———               so   loud   in   a   manner   he   didn’t   recognize   the   sound   of   his   own   voice.               “      we   may   bear   the   same   family   name   and   blood,   but   ACTIONS   SPEAK   LOUDER   than   anything.   and   maybe   i   don’t   know   every   little   bit   of   what   runs   through   your   head,   but   i   know   enough.      ”               YOU   DIDN’T   CARE,         he   wanted   to   say.   how   much   longer   could   he   keep   giving   her   shit   ?      maybe   until   the   ache   in   his   heart   finally   went   away.               “      now,   i’m   kindly   asking   that   you   leave.   your   stinky   energy   is   MAKING   ME   NAUSEOUS   and   i   have   a   important   things   to   do.      ”               careless   wave   of   his   hand,   he   was   returning   his   energy   back   to   the   game   he   was   playing   through   the   main   t.v.   

her   arms   cross,   head   tilting   to   the   side   and   tongue   clicking   LOUDLY   in   disdain.   she   stands   there   in   silence   for   a   moment,   jaw   tight   and   stomach   churning   with   the   realization   that   she   was   going   to   have   to   do   it   -   she   was   going   to   need   to   do   something   horrible   if   she   had   any   chance   at   getting   through   to   him.   “   okay   I’M   SORRY.   ”   she   sucks   in   a   deep   breath,   “   i’m   sorry   i   ate   the   last   bacon   egg   and   cheese   bagel   !   i   didn’t   know   that   you   had   mentally   put   a   claim   on   it,   you   didn’t   give   me   the   signal.   ”   

pushing   out   a   sigh,   she   rolls   his   eyes   at   his   antics,   “   yeah   and   you   just   stink.   seriously   dude,   did   you   even   shower   after   your   morning   run   today   ?   ”   gen   spares   a   glance   at   the   t.v.,   biting   back   a   LAUGH   when   she   sees   an   avatar   with   a   crown   run   across   the   screen,   “   i’m   sure   ben   can   shoot   people   in   the   head   with   you   later,   come   on,   i’ll   buy   you   some   food.   as   a   peace   offering.   ”

[ladiesofcinema]

Florence Pugh | The Little Drummer Girl

[dvnities-a]

@vanitys​   :   “ nobody but you is that pointlessly cruel. ” the words had slipped out without a second thought, pearls now biting on her tongue. brows were furrowed as her gaze narrowed at him, hands on her hips.

it   was   far   beyond   him   why   it   was   decided   in   poison   lab   that   projects   were   to   be   completed   in   pairs.   of   all   the   shitty   things   that   occurred   in   the   DESOLATE   wasteland   that   was   the   bloodstained   floors   of   king’s   dominion,   marcus   was   beginning   to   wonder   if   it   would   be   group   work   that   would   bring   about   his   demise.   specifically,   assigned   group   work   with   the   kind   of   company   he   was   𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚛   𝚘𝚏𝚏   not   keeping.   head   tilts,   the   papers   they   were   meant   to   be   filling   out   long   abandoned.   brow   quirks,   studying   evie   in   silence   to   see   if   he   can   determine   if,   for   once,   she’s   saying   something   because   she   believes   it   and   not   because   she   believes   it’s   what   he   wants   to   hear.

“   look   at   where   you   are.   ”   he   lets   out   a   dry   laugh,   “   the   world   is   a   cruel   place,   it   is   riddled   with   suffering   and   sickness   and   pain   and   NO   ONE   gives   a   shit.   people   turn   a   blind   eye   and   they   shit   on   every   person   who   they   think   is   worthless,   they’ll   let   others   die   no   matter   who   they   are,   as   long   as   it   benefits   them.   as   long   as   𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢   𝚜𝚊𝚟𝚎   𝚊   𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚙𝚕𝚎   𝚋𝚞𝚌𝚔𝚜.   ”   marcus   was   surviving.   traversing   through   the   shadows   that   clung   to   the   streets   of   san   francisco   and   dug   their   claws   into   his   back,   forcing   him   to   tug   along   a   lifetime   of   loss.   the   universe   did   not   care   if   you   were   hurting   and   it   NEVER   would.

he   shakes   his   head,   “   call   me   cruel   all   you   want,   we   both   know   it’s   just   another   lie.   but   hey,   at   least   it’s   a   step   in   the   right   direction.   you’re   not   sitting   there   and   acting   like   you   wanna   be   my   best   friend   anymore,   and   we   both   know   you   never   wanted   that.   ”   marcus   pauses,   gaze   flickering   over   to   evie’s,   “   so   what   DO   you   want   ?   why   the   fake   smiles   and   the   sickly   sweet   bullshit   ?   ”

[weltenwellen]

Jenny Slate, Little Weirds

[dvnities-a]

𝔞𝔲𝔡𝔯𝔢𝔶.

every  time  he  opened  his  mouth  it  seemed  like  marcus  had  something  to  whine  about.  a  big  reason  why  audrey  avoided  talking  to  him  at  all  costs.  it  was  always  reagan  this,  fascists  that,  poser  this,  bullshit  that.  listening  him  was  her  own  special  brand  of  torture.  fuck  you,  fuck  you,  fuck  you,  fuck  you  is  all  that  plays  on  repeat  as  he  carries  on  while  she  tries  to  look  for  an  exit.  

“  don’t  fucking  push  me,  ”  for  good  measure,  she  shoves  him  back.  it’s  childish,  stupid  and  if  it  kept  going  on  like  this,  dutch  and  /  or  his  goons  would  find  them  throwing  punches  on  the  floor.  “  it’s  none  of  your  business  why  i’m  here.  and  fyi,  if  i  wanted  to  be  creative,  i  would  have,  but  you’re  not  worth  the  effort.  sorry  i’d  rather  use  my  brain  to  get  us  out  of  this  instead  of  impress  you  with  my  wit.  ”

despite  the  fact  that  she  strongly  believes  he  has  no  idea  where  the  hell  he’s  going  or  what  the  hell  he’s  doing   ,   there’s  no  other  choice  but  to  follow  him.  untrained,  he  seemed  to  run  on  luck  and  eventually  luck  ran  out.  she  didn’t  want  to  be  anywhere  near  him  when  it  did.  heavy  yet  faint  footsteps  accompany  their  own  as  they  move  down  the  hall.  they’re  almost  home  free  when  sees  it                  a  group  of  shadows  at  the  end  of  the  hall  heading  in  their  direction  “  shit,  shit,  shit.  ”  pinching  the  back  of  his  shirt  she  drags  marcus  back.  eyes  dart  around,  they  couldn’t  go  left,  they  couldn’t  go  right  .  .  .  but  they  could  go  up  right  into  the  vents.  too  many  to  face  them  head  on,  especially  with  him,  but  she  could  have  an  advantage.  “  quick,   give  me  a  boost.  ” 

eyes   narrow,   “   why   ?   what   are   you   gonna   do   ?   try   and   kill   me   ?   cause   that’ll   help   you   SO   much   right   now.   ”   it   was   about   time   audrey   realized   what   it   was   like   to   not   have   everyone   drop   down   and   grovel   at   her   feet.   marcus   was   exhausted   with   the   sight   of   it,   the   performative   theatrics   everyone   made   a   show   of   as   soon   as   she   walked   in   a   room.   “   i’m   𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐃   to   hear   you   have   a   brain   to   use   at   all.   ”

his   lips   part,   moments   from   releasing   a   long   list   of   all   the   things   wrong   with   the   way   she   was   pushing   and   shoving   him   around   as   if   he   were   some   pet   dog   when   his   gaze   flitters   upwards,   following   her   eyes.   “   no   fucking   –   ”   and   then,   in   a   move   that   would   have   surprised   no   one,   she   spoke   anyways.   it   seemed   to   be   a   special   talent   of   hers,   NEVER   shutting   the   hell   up.   jaw   sets   and   he   moves   to   lift   her   as   footsteps   grow   louder,   shoving   her   up   into   the   vent.   no   time   to   think.   𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎   𝚠𝚊𝚜   𝚝𝚘𝚘   𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑   𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚝   𝚝𝚘   𝚠𝚊𝚍𝚎   𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑.   should   have   thought   this   through.   should   have   come   here   with   a   plan.   why   the   fuck   did   he   continue   to   end   up   in   these   scenarios   ? 

BLAME   it   on   king’s   —   it   was   easier   that   way.   the   place   made   him   impulsive.   he   wasn’t   nearly   this   daring   back   at   the   boy’s   home.   everything   had   been   meticulous   there,   𝐢𝐭   𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐝   𝐛𝐞.   every   needle   handled   with   care,   the   insides   of   his   cheeks   had   the   scars   to   prove   it.   heart   rate   quickens   and   he   spares   a   nervous   glance   down   the   hall,   he   wasn’t   gonna   make   it   if   they   wasted   another   second.   “   if   you’re   planning   to   leave   me   for   dead   i’d   prefer   to   know   now.   you   know,   head   start   and   all.   ”

[dvnities-a]

𝔞𝔲𝔡𝔯𝔢𝔶.

three  minutes  and  forty  six  seconds.  that’s  all  it  takes  for  marcus  to  say  something  stupid.  not  blood  boiling  and  infuriating,  but  still  unnecessary  nonetheless.  of  course  she  follows  him  into  the  kitchen  and  of  course  his  grimy  little  drug  ridden  rat  fingers  find  their  way  on  her  decor.  he  couldn’t  be  trusted.  always  so  hell  bent  on  breaking  the  rules,  it  was  a  waste  of  breath  to  set  them  in  the  first  place.  

at  his  music  comment,  audrey  sucks  in  a  sharp  breath.  willie  taps  out  of  this  one  early,  putting  his  hands  up  and  backing  out  of  the  kitchen,  looking  for  two  people  he  could  actually  have  a  good  time  with.  she  could  poison  his  drink.  that  was  in  poor  taste  as  a  hostess.  not  enough  to  kill  him,  just  to  make  him  sick.  shit  his  pants.  humble  him.  no,  audrey.  “  then  what,  pray  tell,  marcus,  ”  fingers  tighten  around  her  cup,  lips  pulling  into  a  tight  smile.  she  says  his  name  like  you  would  say  ‘  mouth  sores.  ’  “  would  you  prefer  i  put  on?  the  cries  of  children  or  the  sounds  of  souls  screaming  from  the  pits  of  hell?  ”  

bringing  the  cup  to  her  lips,  she  downs  the  rest  of  its  contents  in  one  go.  once  it’s  empty,  she  slams  the  cup  on  the  counter  and  opens  up  the  bottle  that  willie  brought.  “  and  what  stereotype  is  that?  that  i  like  fun?  ”  aware  she’s  opening  herself  up  for  target  practice,  she  keeps  going  nonetheless.  “  that  i  enjoy  fun  music?  everyone  else  likes  it,  you’re  the  only  one  complaining.  my  playlist  making  skills?  ”  the  cork  finally  pops  with  a  grunt  and  a  lazy  smile.  “  unmatched.  ”    

“   if   you’re   looking   to   appease   the   hessians,   i’m   sure   they’d   love   that.   ”   it’s   not   surprising   that   music   that   had   any   𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐔𝐀𝐋 𝐕𝐀𝐋𝐔𝐄   was   being   reduced   down   to   metalhead   bullshit   when   surrounded   by   a   backdrop   of   sparkles   and   pink   glitter.   “   but   even   that   would   probably   be   better   than   whatever   hivemind   anthem   you’re   playing.   ”

he   takes   another   drink,   the   only   way   to   deal   with   conversations   like   this   was   through   a   SUBSTANTIAL   amount   of   inebriation.   eyebrows   raise,   amusement   filling   his   features   at   the   fact   that   she   actually   seems   to   believe   the   words   coming   out   of   her    mouth,   “   no.   that   you’re   a   plastic,   self-absorbed,   sheep   that   follows   the   herd   to   make   𝐌𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐘   𝐀𝐍𝐃   𝐃𝐀𝐃𝐃𝐘   happy   and   gain   the   approval   of   your   peers.   in   fact,   you   probably   don’t   know   how   to   exist   without   that   approval.   ”   he   holds   up   a   finger,   pausing   as   he   finishes   off   the   drink   in   hand,   “   i   can   keep   going,   there’s   options.   ” 

hands   fall   and   he   glances   around   the   kitchen   he   could   never   DREAM   of   feeling   at   home   in,   reaching   for   whatever   has   the   highest   alcohol   content   he’s   quick   to   pour   himself   another   glass,  he   snorts,   “   you’re   serious   ?   ”   he   rolls   his   eyes,   “   you   know,   claiming   you   have   a   skill   for   something   doesn’t   mean   you   do.   ”

[dvnities-a]

𝔞𝔲𝔡𝔯𝔢𝔶.

♡     ⇢    ﹙   @dvnities​​​​   ﹚      ﹒      audrey   &   marcus       ;      starter     002    ,    

“  oh  great.  you  brought  vermin. ”  just  his  face  alone  is  enough  to  breed  irritation  underneath  her  pleasant  buzz.  an  eyebrow  quirks  up   ,   full  of  judgment  &  discontent.  she’s  about  ready  to  tell  him  to  get  lost  until  willie  pulls  out  a  bottle  of  her  favorite  and  tells  her  to  relax  and  that  marcus  is  ‘  good  people  ’.  debatable.  

“  fine.  whatever.  come  in.  but  i  swear  to  god  if  he  starts  bumming  everyone  out  by  reading  emo  poetry  or  being  an  asshole,  you’re  both  leaving.  there’s  drinks  in  the  kitchen.  but  don’t  touch  anything  else.  ”  

he   told   willie   he   was   unwelcome,   tried   to   explain   that   people   like   her   never   accepted   PEOPLE   LIKE   HIM   —   they   thrived   on   the   satisfaction   born   from   staring   down   at   him   with   scorn.   he   was   a   walking   reassurance   that   𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝   𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫   𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫   𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝   𝐞𝐠𝐨𝐬,   screaming   from   the   rooftops   hey,   at   least   you’re   not   as   bad   as   him.   smugly,   he   looks   to   willie   with   a   laugh,   waltzing   through   the   doors   as   he   does   so,   “   you’re   ALWAYS   proving   me   right,   audrey.   ”

he   slips   past   people,   deeper   into   a   cesspool   of   loveless   children   left   with   too   much   time   on   their   hands.   fingers   trace   decorations,   it   never   failed   to   amaze   him   how   LITTLE   the   rich   cared   for   others   and   how   much   they   cared   for   their   little   trinkets,   their   𝐬𝐲𝐦𝐛𝐨𝐥𝐬   𝐨𝐟   𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐡.   meandering   to   the   kitchen,   he’s   quick   to   swipe   a   drink,   something   that   was   strong   enough   to   offer   a   reprieve   from   madonna   and   abba. 

eyes   flicker   up,   meeting   the   host’s   dark   hues   and   he   takes   a   short   swig,   “   THIS   was   the   best   music   you   could   find   ?   there’s   a   wide   wondrous   world   out   there   and   you   settled   on   possibly   the   most   air-headed,   pointless,   music   that’s   been   produced   ?   sometimes   i   wonder   if   you’re   TRYING   to   fit   a   stereotype.   ”

[dvnities-a]

𝔞𝔲𝔡𝔯𝔢𝔶.

♡     ⇢    ﹙   @dvnities​​   ﹚      ﹒      audrey   &   marcus       ;      starter     ,     

“  i  hope  you  know  this  is  all  your  fault.  ”  low  and  sharp  are  her  words.  if  they  could,  they’d  pin  him  to  the  wall  and  leave  him  there    FOR    DEAD   .  what  this  rat  was  doing  sniffing  around  her  rogue  mission  was  beyond  her,  but  whatever  the  reason  was  it  didn’t  justify  him  jeopardizing  everything.  

“  what  are  you  even  doing  here?  better  yet,  what  are  you  even  doing  in  king’s  if  you  can’t  even  watch  where  you’re  going  and  avoid  stepping  on  a  dog  toy  and  giving  yourself,  and  us,  away?  you  might  as  well  have  gone  in  his  kitchen  and  started  banging  pots  and  pans.  or,  even  better!  next  time  i’ll  give  you  his  phone  number  and  you  can  give  him  a  call  and  let  him  know  someone  is  outside  ready  to  slit  his  throat.   how  does  that  sound?  ”

the  property  was  big  enough  to  get  lost  in,  but  dutch  knew  it  well  enough  to  find  them  soon  if  they  didn’t  hurry.  no  doubt  the  entire  place  was  under  surveillance.  spotting  the  red  glow  of  a  camera  tucked  into  an  alcove  in  the  roof,  audrey  shoves  marcus  back  against  the  wall,  stopping  him  from  taking  a  step  forward  into  its  line  of  sight.  “  seriously,  watch  your  step  or  i’ll  break  your  goddamn  legs,  rat.  i’m  not  even  kidding.  ”

the   streets   had   been   littered   with   nobodies,   faceless   hearts   and   nameless   souls,   wandering   the   darkness   in   search   of   a   light   that   they   would   NEVER   find   in   the   underbelly   of   san   francisco’s   𝐠𝐨𝐝𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬   𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬.   like   moths   to   a   flame,   they   danced   right   into   the   hands   of   men   like   dutch.   what   marcus   didn’t   understand   is   what   business   someone   like   audrey   would   have   with   him.

he   rolls   his   eyes,   “   what   are   you   doing   here   ?   and   take   your   complaints   up   with   lin,   i   don’t   have   time   for   that   bullshit   and   maybe   it’d   FINALLY   get   him   off   my   ass.   ”   he   had   never   understood   the   particular   interest   the   headmaster   seemed   to   have   in   him,   but   it   had   done  𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞   𝐭𝐨   𝐚𝐢𝐝   𝐡𝐢𝐦   in   recent   months.   “   great   plan,   maybe   he’ll   slit   yours.   ”   he   flashes   a   smirk   before   glancing   down   the   hall   —   time   was   FALLING   AWAY,   he   couldn’t   afford   to   fuck   this   up,   not   once   he   was   so   close. 

“   wow,   that’s   so   original   i’ve   never   heard   that   one   before.   ”   with   serpent   tongue,   cold   eyes   stare   down   at   her   as   he   shoves   her   away   from   him,   “   seriously,   calm   the   fuck   down.   we’re   fine.   no   one   heard   shit.   ”   in   the   distance,   slowed   footsteps   echo   louder,   𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐖𝐒   𝐂𝐀𝐒𝐓   𝐎𝐍   𝐓𝐇𝐄   𝐖𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐒   of   dim   halls.   reaching   down   he   picks   up   the   dog   toy   and,   without   thinking,   throws   it   around   the   corner.   immediately,   a   dying   squeak   erupts   from   it   as   it   hits   a   wall.   “   but   they   did   hear   that.   ”   he   pushes   off   the   wall,   moving   in   the   opposite   direction,   “   if   you   don’t   wanna   die,   i’d   start   moving.   ”

[dvnities-a]

. . . 𝚕𝚒𝚋𝚋𝚢 ?

alexander   &   elizabeth  mercer     ↳      @dvnities​

all  things  considered,  talking  to  a  headstone  was  just  like  talking  to  her  parents.  except,  thankfully,  it  wouldn’t  talk  back.  as  the  years  passed,  she  worried  that  this  piece  of  stone  would  be  all  that  was  left  of  him.  a  seven  year  old’s  memories  were  fleeting,  and  mom  and  dad  made  sure  to  shove  every  piece  of  him  she  couldn’t  salvage  into  boxes.  just  like  they  had  done  to  her.  her  plaid  skirt  billows  out  around  her,  hardly  lady  like,  but  drowning  in  tears  she  could  hardly  care  about  niceties.  

HERE  LIES  ALEXANDER  MERCER   ,    but  what  was  even  under  the  surface?  what  did  that  even  mean?  he  didn’t  have  his  drumsticks,  his  heart,  his  love  of  music.  their  parents  had  stuck  him  in  a  stuffy  suit  and  placed  a  bible  quote  under  his  name  even  though  they  had  made  it  very  clear  there  was  no  place  in  the  chapel  for  people  like  him.  or  her.  maybe  having  little  to  no  memories  of  him  was  best.  her  big  brother  was  a  clean  canvas,  he  could  be  anyone  or  anything  she  needed,  and  right  now  she  needed  someone  to  talk  to.    

“  i  brought  you  flowers,  ”  wiping  her  sweater  sleeve  across  her  face,  libby  sets  the  bouquet  down,  the  only  ones  on  his  plot.  “  i  hope  that  wherever  you  are,  you’re  happy.  and  maybe  you  remember  me?  ”  pulling  her  sweater  sleeves  over  her  hands,  she  shrugs,  her  hopeful  smile  only  lasting  seconds.  “  it’s  dumb,  but  sometimes  i  wish  .  .  .  you  could  talk  back  to  me.  tell  me  everything  is  going  to  be  okay.  tell  me  that  there’s  nothing  wrong  me.  i  mean,  maybe  there  is  something  wrong  with  me.  i’m  talking  to  a  rock,  for  god’s  sake.  ”  even  if  he  was  speaking  to  her,  she  wasn’t  sure  she’d  recognize  his  voice.  “  i  just  wish  you  were  here,  alex.  i  wish  i  had  more  time  with  you.  ”

he   closes   his   eyes   as   he   moves   through   empty   space,   arms   reaching   out   for   SOMETHING   to   grasp   onto,   but   his   fingers   simply   fall   through   air.   he’s   tired   of   darkness,   of   walking   endlessly   in   search   of   a   way   out.   he   doesn’t   think   there   is   one   and   he’s   never   thought   that   there   was   anything   to   do   but   wait.   at   least,   not   until   ——   eyes   fling   open   when   he   hears   a   voice,   𝐀   𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋'𝐒   𝐕𝐎𝐈𝐂𝐄,   and   he   finds   himself   face   to   face   with   a   image   he   wishes   he   could   forget   :   a   gravestone   with   his   name   on   it,   tightly   packed   dirt   at   his   feet.   approaching   it   hesitantly,   he   sits   down,   back   against   the   engraved   stone   and   head   tilted   back,   he’s   not   sure   what’s   compelled   him   to   do   so   but   suddenly   the   voice   is   clear,   as   if   it’s   been   magically   tuned   to   a   frequency   that’s   just   RIGHT.

he   doesn’t   realize   at   first   who’s   speaking,   he   can’t   imagine   who   would   bring   him   flowers,   but   slowly,   it   dawns   on   him.   she   sounds   𝚜𝚘   𝚖𝚞𝚌𝚑   𝚘𝚕𝚍𝚎𝚛   now,   nearly   as   old   as   he   was   when   he   died   —   had   it   been   that   long   ?   regret   sinks   in,   he   never   got   to   be   there   for   her   when   she   NEEDED   him,   he   had   promised   and   then   that   promise   was   ripped   from   both   of   them   and   his   soul   was   plunged   into   nothingness.    “   they   better   be   pretty   ones.   ”   he   thinks   this   must   be   in   his   head,   if   anything   could   even   BE   in   one’s   head   in   the   afterlife,   but   entertaining   the   idea   brings   a   comfort   he   hasn’t   known   𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚌𝚎   𝚑𝚎   𝚠𝚘𝚔𝚎   𝚞𝚙   surrounded   by   darkness

“   the   rock   can   hear   you,   ”   his   voice   is   quiet,   UNSTEADY   and   BROKEN,   terrified   of   a   change   he   ached   for,   “   it’s   gonna   be   okay,   ”   his   brain   screamed   that   it   probably   wouldn’t.   but   on   the   slim   chance   that   this   was   real,   he   wanted   to   do   the   one   thing   he   never   had   been   able   to,   provide   a   little   bit   of   comfort   to   his   sister.   “   and   there’s   nothing   𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆   with   you.   if   you’re   like   when   you   were   a   kid   you   might   be   a   little   weird,   ”   air   pushes   out,   the   closest   he’s   come   to   a   laugh   in   a   long   time,   “   but   that’s   it.   ”   eyes   water   and   he’s   quick   to   blink   any   tears   away,   “   i   wish  𝐢   𝐡𝐚𝐝   𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞   𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞   too,   madlib.   i’m   .   .   .   scared   here.   i   hope   you’re   safe   and   i   miss   you,   i   miss   everything.   ”