welcome to the fun places of weird!!11!!111!!! once you join...YOU NEVER CAN LEAVE >:( anygays im 8887373746738393746 years old so uhh no NSFW things or innaproiate im a artist that keeps up with life but ig inspired by SMG4!!
Yu Haibara was the error in his mathematics. Haibara didn’t understand boundaries. He didn’t understand why Nanami kept his distance, or why Nanami’s shoulders went stiff whenever Haibara dragged him by the sleeve to look at a stray cat or a new bakery. Haibara was a constant, blinding surplus of light in a world that Nanami was already trying to view through shaded glass. "You’re doing it again," Haibara had told him once, sitting on the edge of the training field under the brutal July sun. He was swinging his legs, a half-eaten red bean bun in his sticky hand. "Doing what?" Nanami asked, meticulously wiping the sweat from the grip of his blade. "Thinking too much," Haibara beamed, leaning over until his face invaded Nanami’s peripheral vision. "Your forehead gets that little wrinkle right between your eyes. You’re calculating how much energy it takes to stand next to me, aren’t you?" "I am calculating the efficiency of our next mission," Nanami said flatly, though his chest tightened. "And you are getting sugar on your uniform." "It’s fine! Shoko-san will wash it if I ask nicely." Haibara tore the bun in half, the sweet paste stretching between the pieces. He thrust the larger half directly at Nanami’s mouth. "Here. Eat. You look like you’re planning your own funeral, Nanami." Nanami had stared at the bread. He didn't want it. He didn't really like sweet things. He hated the sticky residue it left on his fingers. But he looked at Haibara’s wide, expectant eyes, eyes that still believed the jujutsu world was a grand adventure, and he took it. The bread was too sweet. It cloyed at the back of his throat. But as he chewed, watching Haibara laugh at a crow landing on the fence, Nanami made a silent, dangerous concession in his strict mathematical mind. If I stay next to him, Nanami thought, I can balance the equation. I am strong enough to handle the remainder. He was wrong. The jujutsu world didn’t care about mathematics.
“Next station... Shibuya.” The mechanical, electronic voice of the Tokyo subway train announcement cut through the silence. Nanami’s eyes snapped open. The warm wooden kitchen, the smell of fresh coffee, and the touch of Haibara’s hand vanished into thin air. There was no peaceful day. There was no quiet town. There was only the damp, suffocating heat of the Shibuya underground station. The air smelled of burnt ozone, concrete dust, and the sickening, heavy rot of curses. Nanami’s hand wasn't holding a coffee cup; it was wrapped tightly around the grip of his blunt, cloth-wrapped blade. He stood alone on the dim platform, half of his uniform burned away, his skin charred, his body operating entirely on adrenaline and dying momentum. He was so incredibly tired. His vision was blurring, the edges of his mind fraying into ash. He looked down at his trembling, soot-stained left hand. For a split second, in the dim, flickering fluorescent light of the subway, he didn't see the blood on his knuckles. He saw the faint, ghostly impression of a warm, phantom palm slipping out of his grip. A humorless, exhausted huff escaped Nanami’s lips. He adjusted his broken, blood-splattered glasses one last time. "A cruel trick," Nanami whispered to the empty, echoing tunnel, his voice barely a rasp. "To show me that right before the end." He turned his head toward the shadows, where the curses were crawling out of the dark, and stepped forward into his final hour. He didn't look back.
The Tokyo High van smelled faintly of gasoline, Shoko’s hidden cigarette smoke, and Geto’s lingering resentment. They were parked outside Hanayashiki Amusement Park. Geto sat in the middle row, staring dead ahead. He was no longer wearing the pink Lolita dress, having successfully exorcised a small portion of Gojo's sanity to get out of it. But he was now wearing a pair of neon pink, glittery cat ears that Gojo had magically slapped onto his head with a binding vow of "if you take them off, I tell the lower-grade students you secretly love pastel." "We are here on a mission," Nanami muttered, adjusting his 2006-era wrapped sunglasses. "A Grade 2 curse has been messing with the hydraulics of the drop tower. We locate the curse, Haibara and I handle the exorcism, and we leave. No rides. No snacks." "Boo! Boring!" Gojo leaned over Nanami’s seat, thrusting a giant cotton candy stick into Nanami's face. "Look, Suguru! They have a shooting gallery! If I win the grand prize, do you think Yaga will let me keep a giant stuffed alpaca in the dorms?" "If it takes up space in the hallway, I am burning it," Geto said, his voice flat. He stepped out of the van, the pink cat ears twitching slightly in the breeze. "Wow! Look at the roller coaster, Nanami!" Haibara gasped, his eyes shining as he looked up at the rickety tracks. "It looks so fast! Do you think the curse makes it go faster? That would be terrifying but also kind of efficient!" "Haibara, please do not give the curses corporate efficiency tips," Nanami sighed, rubbing his temples. Shoko stepped out last, holding a disposable camera. Click. "Shoko," Geto warned, not even turning around. "Relax, Suguru. The cat ears match your dark aura," Shoko said, winding the camera film with a loud clack-clack-clack. "Besides, Satoru bought me a pass to the park's crepe stand if I documented the whole day. A girl’s got to eat." "I am going to murder both of you," Geto murmured politely." "Not before we hit the Ferris wheel!" Gojo wrapped a heavy arm around Geto’s shoulders, dragging him toward the ticket booths. "Come on! The strongest don't wait in lines! I'll just use Limitless to warp us to the front of the queue!" "Satoru, that is a blatant abuse of cursed energy and public civility-" "Too late, we're flying!" With a sharp zip, Gojo and Geto vanished, leaving behind a small dust cloud that settled directly onto Nanami's polished shoes. Nanami stood frozen, staring at his shoes. He slowly looked over at Haibara. "Haibara." "Yes, Nanami?" - 'When we finish this mission, I am quitting jujutsu and becoming a salaryman."
Utahime Iori was having a rare, peaceful day off until her flip phone buzzed. She looked at the screen, saw a photo sent from Shoko, and nearly choked on her barley tea. It was a picture of Geto Suguru looking ready to commit murder while wearing neon pink, glittery cat ears. Ten minutes later, Utahime stormed through the amusement park gates in her traditional shrine maiden robes, looking like an avenging deity. "SATORU! SUGURU!" Utahime shouted, spotting the twin towering figures near the park's central fountain. "What are you two doing?! You are supposed to be supervising a lower-grade mission, not turning a public amusement park into a comedy routine!" Gojo, who was currently eating a neon-blue slushie and holding a giant, six-foot-tall stuffed alpaca he won at the shooting gallery, gasped dramatically. "Look, Suguru! It’s Utahime! And she brought her signature scowl!" Gojo beamed, waving his slushie straw at her. "Hey, Utahime! Did you come all the way from Kyoto just to ride the teacups? Sorry, you have to be this tall to ride the big ones." He held his hand out at his hip level, which was practically Utahime's eye level."I AM AN ADULT AND YOUR SENPAI!" Utahime’s face flushed bright red with pure rage. Dark cursed energy flickered faintly around her sleeves. "Geto! Why are you letting him do this?! And why... why on earth are you wearing cat ears?!" Geto slowly turned his head toward her. The pink ears glinted under the sun. "Utahime-senpai. If I attempt to remove them, Satoru will project a video of me in a Lolita dress onto the Tokyo High main courtyard. I am currently calculating the exact amount of jail time I would serve if I threw him into the sun." "A dress?!" Utahime blinked, horrified, before shifting her glare back to Gojo. "Satoru, you absolute menace! Give those back to him! And stop eating that blue ice, your tongue is disgusting!" "Blehh," Gojo stuck out his bright blue tongue, completely unfazed. "You're just mad because you didn't get any Valentine's chocolate, Utahime. Here, you can have a bite of my alpaca." He thrust the massive, fluffy stuffed animal directly into her face. "GET THIS OVERSIZED FARM ANIMAL OUT OF MY SIGHT!" Meanwhile, a few yards away by the drop tower, Nanami and Haibara were standing over a freshly exorcised Grade 2 curse. Nanami was wiping curse residue off his blade with a handkerchief, watching the screaming match by the fountain. "Should we tell Utahime-senpai that the mission is already over?" Haibara asked, cheerfully holding a bag of souvenir popcorn. "No," Nanami said flatly, turning his back to the chaos. "If we approach them, we will be dragged into the gravitational pull of Gojo's stupidity. We are walking to the train station. Right now." "But what about Shoko?" Behind the fountain, Shoko was sitting on a bench, casually eating a strawberry crepe. Click. She snapped another picture of Utahime trying to choke Gojo with his own stuffed alpaca while Geto watched with an expression of deep, spiritual exhaustion. "Don't worry about me, kids," Shoko called out, not looking away from the camera. "This is better than any reality TV show. Hey, Utahime! Aim for his shins! Limitless doesn't protect his pride!"
The sun was beginning to set over Hanayashiki Amusement Park, bleeding into soft, bruised shades of orange and violet. The neon lights of the Ferris wheel flickered to life, casting long, fragile shadows across the concrete. A few steps away from the screaming match between Gojo and Utahime, Haibara and Nanami leaned against the metal railing near the park exit. Haibara was quietly munching on his remaining popcorn, his eyes reflecting the warm glow of the park lights. The usual hyperactive bounce in his step slowed, settling into a rare, quiet warmth. "Hey, Nanami," Haibara said softly, looking back at the chaotic group. Gojo was currently trying to balance the giant alpaca on Geto's head, Utahime was swinging her purse at him, and Shoko was just laughing, her flip phone held high to catch it all. "What is it, Haibara?" Nanami asked, his eyes focused on the train schedule in his hands. "I was just thinking..." Haibara smiled, that bright, unfiltered expression that always seemed far too fragile for a world filled with monsters. "We're really lucky, aren't we? The senpais are the strongest. Shoko-san can fix any wound. And you're always here to keep me steady. When we're all together like this... I feel like we're invincible." Nanami paused, looking up from his paper. Haibara turned his head, his smile widening as he looked directly at his friend. "I don't ever want this to change. I want us to stay just like this. All of us, together, forever!" Nanami stared at him for a second. He let out a small, quiet sigh, softer than his usual exhausted ones, and adjusted his glasses. "Forever is a mathematically impossible metric, Haibara. But... I suppose I wouldn't mind a few more years of this." Haibara beamed, thrilled by the rare concession. "Yeah! Forever!" The laughter of the teenagers began to fade as a sudden, chill wind swept through the park, blowing a cloud of loose leaves across the pavement, blurring the scene into a haze. Haibara’s voice trailed off into a comfortable quiet as the ferris wheel behind them glowed softly. The exhaustion of the day finally caught up to him. Without a word, he let his head drop sideways, resting it gently against Nanami’s shoulder. Nanami tensed instantly, his posture going rigid as a board. He looked down at the mop of dark hair pressing into his jacket. He raised a hand to push Haibara off, but stopped. He looked back at Gojo and Geto bickering in the distance, then back down at Haibara, who was already half-asleep. With a quiet sigh, Nanami relaxed his shoulders, letting Haibara lean against him as the cool wind picked up.
Fwip.
The sound of a lighter sparking cut through the silence. The warm, golden light of the 2006 amusement park vanished instantly, replaced by the sterile, fluorescent white glare of the Tokyo Jujutsu High morgue.It was the present day. Shoko Ieiri sat at her metal desk, a lit cigarette held between her fingers. She wore her white lab coat over dark clothes, deep shadows permanently etched under her tired eyes. The air in the room didn't smell like popcorn or sweet crepes anymore; it smelled of formaldehyde, ozone, and old ash. She took a long, slow drag, letting the smoke curl up toward the ceiling. On the corner of her desk, buried beneath medical charts and autopsy reports, sat an old, scratched flip phone from 2006. Its battery had been dead for years, but she had never been able to throw it away. Inside its digital memory, and in the quiet, hollow spaces of her mind, the five of them were still teenagers, standing under the neon lights of an amusement park, laughing at a boy wearing pink cat ears. Before the world broke them. Before "forever" ran out. Shoko tapped the ash off her cigarette into a small metal tray, her face entirely numb. "Invincible," she murmured to the empty, freezing room, her voice raspy from years of smoke and unspoken grief. "You really were a fool, Yu." She leaned back in her chair, staring at the ceiling as the smoke drifted apart. People in the jujutsu society always talked about her as if she were blessed. She had the Reverse Cursed Technique. She was indispensable. She was lucky. Because she couldn't be sent out to the front lines to die, she got to stay safe in her sterile white room. But sitting here alone, Shoko knew that survival was just a slower, quieter kind of execution. She was so incredibly unlucky. First it was Haibara. Sweet, optimistic Yu, who wanted them all to be together forever. He had been brought back to her morgue as a broken body, a premature end to their youthful illusions. She had stitched him up, closed his eyes, and swallowed the first bitter taste of what their lives would truly cost. Then it was Suguru. Her classmate. The boy who used to politely bicker with Satoru while wearing ridiculous pink cat ears. He had walked down a dark path she couldn't follow, turning himself into a monster until Satoru finally had to end it. Shoko had been forced to dissect the body of the boy she used to share snacks with. Then Nanami. Reliable, exhausted Kento, who had managed to escape the jujutsu world once, only to be dragged back by duty, eventually burning away into nothing but ash and a final, lingering ghost of a curse. And finally... Satoru. The strongest. The boy who was supposed to be untouchable. The one who had forcefully zipped up that ridiculous pink dress in 2006, laughing like the world belonged to him. Now, even he was gone, leaving the world a much colder, darker place. They were all gone. The boy who wanted forever, the boy who lost his way, the boy who just wanted a normal life, and the god who couldn't save himself. Shoko closed her eyes, breathing in the scent of chemical preservatives and stale tobacco. She was the last one left standing from that sunny afternoon at Hanayashiki Amusement Park. She had survived them all. "Lucky," she whispered, a humorless, breaking laugh escaping her throat as a single tear finally cut through the exhaustion on her face. "Yeah. I'm real lucky."
Hobie wasn’t clingy, per se. He was independent and hung around whoever he liked, but mostly he liked it his own company.
Until he met you.
He didn’t really know what it was about you, but he couldn’t help but be at least 3 feet away from you, anytime.
Obviously the two of you are just friends, you had only just been invited in the silly four group (Pavitr, Miles, Gwen, Hobie), and he didn’t want to scare you off, but he really couldn’t help himself. He was just pulled into you.
No matter what he would always have an arm around your shoulders, pulling you into his chest, and you’re just all too nice to say anything about it.
Eventually it became a running joke in HQ that Hobie followed you around like a puppy. Of course no one would dare to say this to his face, but it was just too, out of character, to not make fun of.
When Miguel would send you on solo missions he would force (beg) Miguel to send him with you. Just for that extra time with you.
Whenever you’re walking around HQ, talking up random spider people you can bet that Hobie is trailing behind you quietly. You, of course, don’t mind it. Cuz you think it’s just normal Hobie behavior.
And whenever you speak? God, it was like angels were singing. He only likes looking you directly in the eyes when you talk him (Pavitr swears his pupils turn into hearts). Then his fingers would trail up and down your arm and he’ll fiddle with all the little accessories on your clothes. Nodding and humming while you rant about something.
Hobie’s a lovesick puppy around you and you’re too oblivious to notice.
Tokyo Prefectural Jujutsu High School, February 14, 2006.
Gojo: "Getooooo!!!!!!!!-"
Geto: "What."
Gojo: "Oh, c'mon!!!!!! Don't be so silly-dilly!"
Nanami: "What.. does that mean?"
Gojo: "Seal :D"
Haibara: "Awesomeee!!!'
Nanami: "It is not awesome, Haibara. He just said seal."
Haibara: "Seals are cute and cool!"
Shoko: "Heh... Heineken... I need.."
Gojo: "ooh love ooh lover boy whatcha doing tonight" *singing Good Old-Fashioned Girl*
Geto: "(Gojo: "set up my alarm turn up my charm and it's because I'm a good old-fashioned lover boy") *checks the calendar* Oh. It's Valentine's Da-"
Gojo: 'You know what that means!"
Geto: '.....Ffffuuc-"
(Geto was forced to be in a pretty pink dress)
Geto: (Struggling against Gojo's grip) "Satoru, let go of me before I make you swallow a swarm of fly heads!"
Gojo: (Forcefully zipping up a frilly, pastel-pink Lolita gown on Geto) "Hold still, Suguru! The fans on the internet demanded a Valentine's Day special! Look how aerodynamic the skirt is!"
Haibara: (Clapping wildly) "It really brings out your eyes, Geto-senpai! Very vibrant!"
Shoko: (Taking a picture with a flip phone) "This is going directly on the bulletin board. Happy Valentine's, boys."
(Geto's eye twitches as the camera flash goes off, his jaw clenched tightly enough to shatter teeth.)
Geto: "Shoko. Delete that. Right now. Or your medical license won't be the only thing getting revoked today."
Gojo: (Slapping Geto on the back, nearly knocking the giant frilly bow out of place) "Don't listen to him, Shoko! Send it to the principal! Send it to the Tokyo authorities! Send it to Mei Mei- wait, no, she'll charge us royalties."
Nanami: (Deep sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose) "This entire establishment is a safety hazard to my mental well-being. Haibara, we are leaving. The curses outside are far more logical than whatever is happening in this room."
Haibara: "But Nanami! Look at the lace detailing! It has little embroidered skulls on it! Do you think they make them in my size?!"
Geto: (Slowly raising his hand, dark cursed energy swirling around his fingertips) "Satoru. I am giving you exactly three seconds to unzip this monstrosity before I summon a Grade 1 curse to chew off your eyelashes."
Gojo: (Striking a dramatic, magical-girl pose next to him, totally unfazed) "Aw, Suguru, don't be a party pooper! We're the strongest! We can rock pastel pink! Right, Yu Haibara?!"
Haibara: "YES, SENPAI! ABSOLUTELY!"
Shoko: (Typing furiously on her flip phone, ignoring the chaos) "Sent to Yaga. He says he's making a matching pink felt doll. Have fun, Suguru."
tokyo Prefectural Jujutsu High School, 2006, February 14 - Gojo: "Getooooo!!!!!!!!-"
Geto: "What."
Gojo: "Oh, c'mon!!!!!! Don't be so silly-dilly!"
Nanami: "What.. does that mean?"
Gojo: "Seal :D"
Haibara: "Awesomeee!!!'
Nanami: "It is not awesome, Haibara. He just said seal."
Haibara: "Seals are cute and cool!"
Shoko: "Heh... Heineken... I need.."
Gojo: "ooh love ooh lover boy whatcha doing tonight" *singing Good Old-Fashioned Girl*
Geto: "(Gojo: "set up my alarm turn up my charm and it's because I'm a good old-fashioned lover boy") *checks the calendar* Oh. It's Valentine's Da-"
Gojo: 'You know what that means!"
Geto: '.....Ffffu-"
(Geto was forced to be in a pretty pink dress)
Geto: (Struggling against Gojo's grip) "Satoru, let go of me before I make you swallow a swarm of fly heads!"
Gojo: (Forcefully zipping up a frilly, pastel-pink Lolita gown on Geto) "Hold still, Suguru! The fans on the internet demanded a Valentine's Day special! Look how aerodynamic the skirt is!"
Haibara: (Clapping wildly) "It really brings out your eyes, Geto-senpai! Very vibrant!"
Shoko: (Taking a picture with a flip phone) "This is going directly on the bulletin board. Happy Valentine's, boys."
(Geto's eye twitches as the camera flash goes off, his jaw clenched tightly enough to shatter teeth.)
Geto: "Shoko. Delete that. Right now. Or your medical license won't be the only thing getting revoked today."
Gojo: (Slapping Geto on the back, nearly knocking the giant frilly bow out of place) "Don't listen to him, Shoko! Send it to the principal! Send it to the Tokyo authorities! Send it to Mei Mei- wait, no, she'll charge us royalties."
Nanami: (Deep sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose) "This entire establishment is a safety hazard to my mental well-being. Haibara, we are leaving. The curses outside are far more logical than whatever is happening in this room."
Haibara: "But Nanami! Look at the lace detailing! It has little embroidered skulls on it! Do you think they make them in my size?!"
Geto: (Slowly raising his hand, dark cursed energy swirling around his fingertips) "Satoru. I am giving you exactly three seconds to unzip this monstrosity before I summon a Grade 1 curse to chew off your eyelashes."
Gojo: (Striking a dramatic, magical-girl pose next to him, totally unfazed) "Aw, Suguru, don't be a party pooper! We're the strongest! We can rock pastel pink! Right, Yu Haibara?!"
Haibara: "YES, SENPAI! ABSOLUTELY!"
Shoko: (Typing furiously on her flip phone, ignoring the chaos) "Sent to Yaga. He says he's making a matching pink felt doll. Have fun, Suguru."
then I meet him because I am there, why? Idk, you bumped into him, you looked at him and ran away, wow so cool I'm so lazy to write anything real thing when I am motivated okay bye thanks because I just wasted your time
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