no

[unmoistened]

i don’t have a nervous system. i am a nervous system

[unmoistened]

i took off my pants and i was wearing ANOTHER pair of pants what the fuck happened last night

[unmoistened]

thank GOD i didnt have sex last night i would have had to take off TWO pairs of pants that would have been so embarrassing

[e-mo-g-blog]

Lil sims things <3

#462 when ur wife has your brother's baby and you r looking out the window bc it's snowing

[e-mo-g-blog]

My dad just had hip surgery and almost knocked over my alcohol with his crutch and I said "watch it dad I'll beat u with that crutch" and he said "that's fine"

[e-mo-g-blog]

I'm watching Faking It

[thebruise-deactivated20151210]

Nobody tells this to people who are beginners. I wish someone had told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase; they quit. Most people I know who do interest, creative, work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know that it’s normal and the important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you finish one piece. It’s only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take a while. It’s normal to take awhile. You just gotta fight your way through.

Ira Glass (via greasequeen)

[e-mo-g-blog]

Is My Cat Ticklish Under Her Armpits Or Am I Just Wasting My Time: a memoir by me

[e-mo-g-blog]

me: *calls white house* hi may i speak to mr. barack please

white house phone answerer: right away, thanks for saying 'please.' you are so polite and also beautiful. youre invited to mr. barack's birthday party.

me: thanks. *gets transferred*

barack obama: what's up

me: do you think i can scoop the cookie dough out of my cookie dough ice cream and bake it

[destroymen-deactivated20141211]

straight men comic

[shortvideosandstuff]

[browngirlinterrupted-deactivate]

don’t check up on people who have decided you are not in their picture anymore. you don’t need to know how they’re doing. save yourself the trouble, seriously.

[deepthroatmom]

[benshaws]

When a dad found out he was going to be a grandpa.

[2damnfeisty]

This is so precious.

[blackfemmejeanvaljean]

yo man but just think how when this kid is grown up and he’s remembering their grandfather they’ll always have this video to remind them that they’re grandfather loved them from the beginning and oh god I have something in my eye

[boyegas-deactivated20181222]

[deletionin10sec-deactivated2016]

panic/anxiety attack

breath in for 4 seconds

hold your breath for 7 seconds

exhale breath for 8 seconds

repeat once or twice more.

This causes an autonomic nervous system shift from a sympathetic (fight or flight reaction) state to a parasympathetic response.

Use this for panic/anxiety attacks, exams, presentations.

[e-mo-g-blog]

Me as a first grader : boy I sure would love to not be able to get married later and to have people tell me "you just haven't met the right guy yet" and sit through church and school being told I'm disgusting and going to hell and be harassed in public places for my hair/clothes and have people judge me almost constantly while also asking horribly invasive questions" *has crush on girl in kindergarten*