I'm a bit slow and backlogged, but vaguely around! -March 24, 2026
Being held gently by a giant alien robot might not fix me, but - no, actually, it would.
•I post about humans vibing with Transformers! Personal blog is @darkwingduck. I can reply from here, but I have to like and follow from there.
•Platonic & queerplatonic only out of my own preferences, because I’m aro-ace and interested in exploring nonsexual intimacy in the TF world.
•Blog owner is an adult. They/them pronouns are fine. <3
•Fair warning that I don’t care about canon! These are my fun little guys and I will do as I wish to them.
•I also don’t strictly follow any particular continuity - more a mishmash of G1, TFP, and MTMTE but with an occasional splash of other media. I steal concepts and characters from all over. You’re welcome to think of it as whatever version you prefer.
•All original posts are just my thoughts, if they’re not your thing that’s okay 💕 I don’t care about being right, I am just here to play with ideas. We live in a difficult world, take happiness where you can, to each their own.
•I crosspost here and on AO3 @ earthsparked!
•I can’t promise to answer all requests, but askbox is open and I do love to interact. 💖
•You are welcome and encouraged to create your own fanworks based off of anything here, if it takes your fancy.
•I want this to be a warm and welcoming space. I’ll be curating it to be one as best I can.
•There is no such thing as “yapping” here!
Tag Organization
#humans are space (ship) cats
A Transformers take on the scifi trope of humans being space cats. A 'verse where humans of a loosely affiliated group called the coterie serve on Cybertronian spaceships more or less as ship's cats, providing pest control, emotional support, and organic solutions to mechanical problems.
#GET PACK BONDED IDIOT
Transformers (and sometimes others) falling victim to humans' pack bonding ways. This is pure trope in action; sometimes I like to ground it in reality a little, though.
#transformers first contact au
Any kind of scenario where humans and Cybertronians are meeting and interacting for the first time, and all the learning, confusion, and fun that comes with that.
#transformers x reader
#transformers x human
Don't let that x fool you, I use it because it's a more common tag than the &. My writing is platonic though sometimes quite intimate (but feel free to imagine as you will, I'm not a cop, gosh <3)
#earthsparked asks
Asks I've answered
#earthsparked chatter
General engagement
#self-insert sunday
Every Sunday I celebrate the joys of self-inserts. Cringe is dead. Love yourself.
#human distribution system
Woe, human be upon ye. Applies when there is talk of a human or humans being acquired, one way or another, by Cybertronians. Has some crossover with other categories.
#Scrappy the scraplet
Connected to the idea of humans as spaceship cats, Scrappy's your tamed/reprogrammed/partially domesticated and heavily modded personal assistant/pet/service scraplet. The last one you left alive after wiping out a swarm that tried to eat your mechs, he was mostly intact. Now he has a bunch of extra abilities to help you with all the things humans can't do. He's too well-trained and coded to attack at random, but he still makes most mechs uneasy. Loves humans. He's painted neon pink with bright yellow, green, and purple flowers. Looks like a demonic rooster. Comes up to about your knees, weighs about 25 pounds - much heavier than most scraplets, because of modified armor. Has a subspace pocket in his mouth where he carries things for you. Can "spit" items to you.
#peepaw rung
I just really love Rung. He is peepaw. After meeting humans, he carries grandma candy around for them. Dibs on the strawberry bonbon.
I feel like this isn't talked about enough in the fandom and it makes me so sad because of the missed potential, but... why does no one ever talk about the relationship between humans and junkions?! They took our tv signals and made it into part of their culture and their language! How would that affect how they see humans? How important would we be to them? Probably very! Because we are on their tvs! And I think humans would have an easier time understanding them than non junkion cybertronians because we have a wider range of context for the phrases from movies/ ads/ TV shows
Anon, I will be real and admit I do not know nearly enough about the Junkions to give this the response it deserves, but it sounds like you are 1000% right and there’s a ton of potential there.
Idk if you’ve explored human music vs Cybertronian music, but I’ve had Thoughts abt how they would receive human music and how they widely they must differ. Sure, you’ve got mechs like Jazz who love human music, and then you’ve got Soundwave who used to make his own tunes. Which, obviously, got me thinking.
First of all: the age gap determines the length and intensity of our music. Their music must go on for SO MCFREAKIN LONG. They’re millions of years old, you can’t tell me they wouldn’t sit there taking ages to consider a whole song that lasts hours from start to finish. While our songs are, at best, 15 minutes, in some very rare cases. As such, they have a lot to work with, creating mini masterpieces in one long song. The closest we come to is concerts and orchestral performances, and even then, they’re much too short. That said, our music is jam-PACKED with intense emotional creativity. We don’t have much time to waste drawing out the chorus, and though their computer brains do work faster, our human brains have more to consider and process all at once, concluding entire stories and conversations in one second, while a Cybertronian crunches numbers in an amazing battle scenario. And we make so much more music in one generation than they would in three.
Second: physiology breeds a whole new range of hearing/vocalizations that we could never hope to hear or reproduce. We have a limited hearing range even among other organics on our own planet, while Cybertronians can produce and hear squeaks and rumbles beyond our comprehension. There are likely some ranges of sounds that would be physically and mentally unsafe or mass-insanity inducing for humans to hear that they would consider common-use in their music. And what we can’t produce of our own ability, we created instruments to do for us, and trained ourselves to play them professionally. They have variety of sound on their side, which allows for multiple parts in a single song. We don’t, and while it makes our music rather repetitive, it does allow for a variety of genres and Depth. Both species have variety, just in different dimensions; Cybertronians spread theirs out in longer music, while humans display ours in layers over short bursts (ie, drums, bass, vocals, etc). Different aspects, all at once and each with their own variety that compliments all other aspects or repeats later in the song, often at a different octave to tickle that pleasant part of our brains for that ‘sheer awesomeness’ response. Again, a physiological response that may baffle some Cybertronians, and leads to—
Third: the Human Response to music. Music isn’t a necessity to survival. It took Cybertronians probably millions of years to think ‘hey, these vocalizations in concert sound kinda neat, maybe I could share this,’ while humans have made millions of songs in less than a decade. It is such a pleasurable activity, to create, to share, to listen, to consider, to remember music, that our bodies physically react; hair raising, spine-tingling, eye-dilating, smiling, weeping, memory-inducing, thought-provoking human music. Idk if there are any “reproductions” of Cybertronian music someone tried producing out there, but dang, it’s gotta be wildly different from anything we could ever come up with.
And I’m here for it. :) I wanna see reaction videos of Cybertronians listening to human music, and vice versa.
This is absolutely genius! Love how you framed this and your ideas!
Music is such an inextricable part of being human, I can definitely see this being a way we end up bonding.
Not to shitpost on your beautiful concepts, but it also brings to mind Jazz offering to play some music from Cybertron that really slaps, then smiling and standing there in total silence to see how you react.
(He’s not actually playing music.)
(Will you agree it slaps or fess up, he wants to know. For SpecOps reasons. Totally.)
(Then someone makes the mistake of teaching him what a Rickroll is and things happen)
I don’t know if you’ve been asked this before, but what do you think about transformers reacting to what humans believe alien life would be? I’m not really talking about like older films. I’m talking about more recent stuff like Xenomorph and James Cameron avatar. How humans distinctly perceived alien life to be somewhat similar to us, organic.
Oh, GREAT question!
I’m gonna sidestep biology a little because…well, organic alien biology is probably as weird to them as it would be to us. What I find especially interesting though is what they’d think about how we portray those species and how we portray or frame our interactions with them in fiction.
Otherwise. It’d be a mixed bag, wouldn’t it! You have things like the Xenomorph/Alien franchise where it’s pure horror, our own bodies turned against us and danger lurking. I feel like they’d consider that a pretty reasonable thing to fear, really. Organic bodies ARE squishy and some organics reproduce in a weird-ass way. They have things like scraplets and shadowplay, I think they’d understand the basis of those fears regarding bodily autonomy and integrity, and be sympathetic (if a little mystified at our apparent love for exploring such things in fiction). Some mech would inevitably go “wait, is this meant to be some weird exploration of what getting unexpectedly pregnant feels like for humans” and Rung would probably get like five or six papers published in The Journal of Xenopsychology on this phenomenon.
The invasion movies like War of the Worlds or Independence Day would probably lean toward two camps: the guys who get that sometimes it’s really just loud explodey shoot-em-ups with a nebulous outside presence as a disposable bad guy; and the ones who can look deeper and see how the whole genre can be considered based on very real fears and societal problems. Invasion is a mirror image for the issue of colonialism…but also fears of your powerful empire being toppled from outside forces…which…yeah. They would both understand that from their own experiences on Cybertron AND from, you know, themselves being a diaspora on Earth. That side of things can be real ugly. That’s a fascinating genre of study tbh. Sometimes it’s just a shit-ton of racism.
Then there’s the ones where we kinda just want to be friends with the aliens but some of us are also sort of scared, and scared people with something to protect and a lot of money and guns at hand are sometimes gonna do stupid, stupid things. The ending of The Iron Giant, man…
I think the takeaway from things like that and ET, etc, where first contact is a little scary but the aliens are neutral or even well-intentioned, and humanity is split in its reaction, would be the most useful for the Cybertronians. Because that seems like it’d be the most realistic.
There’s even some media where it’s made clear humanity’s reaction being fear or hate is 100% wrong even if things are a little muddled about the alien’s intentions. One of my personal underrated favorites is Super 8. I think they’d respect that at the very least, we ARE aware of how reactionary we can be, and that it can be damaging not only to others but to ourselves.
…there would also be others (Whirl) who would love to tell gross-out scary stories about both real and not real aliens they’ve met and freak out the humans just because.
Genuinely I think the entire alien movie genre is more about how we think and feel about ourselves and each other and our species than anything else. Including Transformers oops too meta back up back up
Hello, I stumbled upon your blog a little bit ago and I have been in love with it since
I love your stories and posts about how cybertronians interact with humans and the various differences between the two and how both sides interact with each other
I just love everything about this blog
Thank you so much! I appreciate the kind words! I’m so glad you’ve been enjoying. I’ve been a bit LOA lately - but I won’t go too far from one of my favorite fandoms. 🌟
I haven’t had much time to write lately, but I’m on a vibe of humans being the only other species besides Cybertronians who have EM fields. Or at least, the only ones where, shockingly, it’s a damn close 1:1 interpretation of them meaning the same things without needing translation. Like appearing in a strange place with strange people, and somehow realizing you speak the same language despite that being astronomically unlikely.
They roll up on Earth for whatever reason, and everything in them on a spark deep level is saying “these tiny organics are LIKE YOU. They’re LIKE YOU in a way no other species has ever been.”
Even before they do pick up Earth languages, you still manage to communicate well enough because there is something shared, something familiar. Just deeper than words.
It can be fun playing with ideas like whether humans can or can’t feel EM fields, what that might actually look like, if they’re big and powerful or barely there, if we subconsciously or consciously can control them or not. If, on the flipside, something in us sees Cybertronians for the first time and goes “you’re made of metal but you’re LIKE ME.” Not a thing but a person.
Maybe we do feel EM fields, maybe we do it all the time among each other. Maybe that’s what mirror neurons are for. But we don’t recognize it because it’s just normal, until confronted with an alien mechanical species that should be terrifying and Other and instead they’re instantly not. They’re familiar. Not because of how they look but because of how they feel.
And it takes ages and ages for anyone to start asking “why?” But when they do, it leads down some real damn interesting rabbit holes.
You meet Jazz one day while he’s going around posing as a Waymo, to be able to get more intel on the native species. Fortunately humans have developed self-driving vehicles, so it’s not difficult to pose as one. He’s enjoying being an anonymous presence, because people tend to ignore him entirely and go about their business. He can listen in on your phone conversations, observe your reactions to the world around you, and you’ll never even know. (Except you’ll find that strangely, your payment glitched and never pulled any money out of your account..?)
Not to mention, he’s far safer as a driver than any human on the road, even if having to pose as an insentient car can get aggravating. Jazz finds himself fascinated by the little mammals, and it doesn’t take long before, his compassion for others rises to the forefront.
It’s hard not speaking up when an upset human gets inside his passenger compartment. He keeps a running list of advice going in his processor.
Girl, dump his aft, he clearly doesn’t respect you if he won’t even take the trash out. You think Prowler would let me get away with that?
Aw, sweetspark, it’s not that bad! I’m not an expert but mammal hair grows back fast, don’t it? You could start a fashion statement.
Ask for that raise, or tell ‘em you quit! Or just go ahead and quit. You don’t wanna know what I’m seein’ on your boss’ computer, but I bet the FBI would.
Because sometimes, well. He’s nosy, all right? He’s SpecOps, poking his servos into all kinds of pies is his job.
And it’s not like it’s hard for him to do a tiny bit of snooping here and there. And if he just happens to delete the medical debt that one poor lady was crying to her mom about, a cast still on her broken strut and pain in her movements? Nobody needs to know.
You, though. There’s something about you that makes a full-frame shiver go through him right down to his wheels, as you pause as the door and gently run your delicate fingers over the curve of his hood.
Wow! I had no idea they’d gotten some taste in Waymos. You must have some impressive tracking on you, handsome, to keep someone from stealing you.
Your strange organic EM field is full of honest, open appreciation. Maybe it’s that, even more than the soft touch to his hood and the words of praise, that coaxes a startled rev of pride from his engine. He quickly quiets it, knowing Mirage and Cliffjumper would hassle him to no end about it if they’d heard. The terrifying head of Prime’s SpecOps, preening like a newspark in his first big-mech frame, because of the attention of a tiny, squishy biped?
He settles into a calm idle as you turn your head, furrow appearing between your brow as you undoubtedly wonder what that had been about. But it doesn’t put you off enough to refuse to get in the car. As you pull open his door and settle inside the passenger compartment, Jazz lets his own senses gently twine about you. Inquiring, questioning.
Humans aren’t the biggest mystery on Earth, but they do make the Autobots’ list of Certified Weirdnesses (quite long to begin with; Prowl and Red Alert keep arguing over whether something called Sasquatch might deserve a place on the list of potential threats to the Ark).
The fact that your species so closely resembles theirs, both in physical form and in your extreme sociability, is one thing. That you have electromagnetic fields despite being organic, despite not having sparks? That’s something else entirely.
They’ve been far and wide across the universe in this Primus-forsaken war, but nobody, not Jazz, not Prowl, not Ratchet, not Perceptor, not Optimus not even Kup, the old slagger - nobody has ever met another species with a compatible EM field.
Ever.
The other sapients they’ve crossed paths with, almost always to the poor aliens’ detriment if not outright extinction, never had so much as a squeak of a field. That had been common knowledge on Cybertron when Jazz had been a young mech. It was a dull fact mentioned in educational downloads, worth skimming over at best.
To say their first moments waking up on Earth were startling was an understatement. When they had encountered these tiny mech-like organics, felt their fear and wonder and curiosity as if they were Cybertronians writ small in flesh…
It wasn’t any surprise when Prime had made the order that they were setting up an outpost here. The fact they’d gotten wind of the ‘Cons somehow also lurking around the backwater little rock had just seemed like one more puzzle piece falling into place, for all that it was an unwelcome revelation.
The humans, the whole damn planet was a puzzle. Jazz loved puzzles. And something tells him there’s a lot more to this particular passenger than meets the eye.
So when he lets you out at your destination, he decides to hang around. Park in an open spot, settle down on his tires. Just for a while. Just to figure out what it is about you that keeps tickling his circuits…
Hello there so I've been reading all through your human are space cat posts and can't help but wonder something. So you know how cats seek out warm spots or can be found in the most random places around the house? Would humans seek out the most warm spots sometimes just laying on their mechs or be found near vents that are like a hotspot for any cold human? Could definitely see some purposely carrying around spare blankets so they can just hold their humans while they just go boneless.
Definitely! And in the summer, the ones with alt modes that are vehicles would have air conditioning.
Not only that, I have a headcanon about mechs on earth setting up little human traps like a bowerbird trying to get humans to come hang out and maybe get some cuddles.
I wanna be friends with Prowl. He reminds me of me in that we are both logical and have social struggles, and he is very cool.
It would be so neat to just, hang out with him while he does his professional tasks. Chilling on his shoulder during work, having neat or insightful conversations about complex topics and/or each others’ species (there’s so much to learn from each other!), and just enjoying each other’s company.
(It would also be very fun to be friends with Jazz and Prowl’s other friends/companions too. Like the twins and Mirage. Maybe I just wanna be friends with robots :) ).
Astronauts are so funny man. Here's just a couple of things I've found hilarious from this past week of space stuff:
It's probably already been spread around here enough already, but in case anyone's missed it; 7 hours after launch, commander Reid Wiseman, dealing with tech issues, uttered the generational quote "I have two Microsoft Outlooks and neither one of those are working."
After fixing the issues that were afflicting the onboard toilet, mission specialist Christina Koch (who has quickly become my favourite of the four) laughingly said “I’m the space plumber, I’m proud to call myself the space plumber.”
On Easter Sunday, the Artemis II crew hosted a makeshift egg hunt, by hiding packets of dehydrated scrambled eggs around their Orion capsule.
The way the crew always makes sure to make it very clear they're in space when doing interviews. From stuff like Wiseman just hanging out floating sideways on screen or Koch letting her hair loose so it can freely span out flowing around her.
While in transit, the crew decided to record a parody of those bad 80s sitcom intros where everyone turns and smiles at the camera.
When the crew reached the furthest point from Earth in the mission, they jokingly clambored over each other in an effort to get to the far side of the capsule, so that they could individually claim to be the furthest person from earth.
At the same time, on the ISS which was at the time on the other side of earth, the 7 astronauts onboard had a light-hearted race to the far side of the station, making jokes about being the furthest humans from Artemis.
On the way back to earth, NASA actually managed to establish an audio call between the crews of the ISS and Artemis II (where they shared the above info), and Koch called one member of the ISS crew, Jessica Meir, her "astro-sister" as the two of them previously spacewalker together in 2019. Meir then responded I'm so happy that we are back in space together, even if we are a few miles apart" (a few here being 230,000).
While Jeremy Hansen was doing an interview, Wiseman and Koch were just in the background swatting the mission mascot (a little moon plush toy named Rise) back and forth between each other.
So. To humans, Cybertronians are super, SUPER old, right? They’ve been far, far more advanced than us before we even evolved from primordial ooze. While a great deal of Cybertronians (COUGH Decepticons COUGH) use that as another reason to see humans+organic life as inferior…
In not even a fraction of one mech’s entire possible lifetime (depending on the continuity) humans have gone from insect-eating rodents to apes to complex, intelligent, sapient beings. In what could be a minute in the grand scheme of Cybertronian time, we’ve gone from stone tools to brain surgery! And we are even making advancements in technology to cure our own mortality!
Isn’t that simply fascinating? I kinda imagine it would be like us watching an anthill transform into a functioning, conscious society within a day.
YEAH. THIS.
Add in to all that, that there’s a very good chance they were aware of Earth in the distant past (which also depends on the continuity) and could have been thinking of our planet as uninhabited by sentient life. Only to return and excuse me, EXCUSE me, when did the little mammals figure out radio signals? Why is there a well-developed road system? What the frag is that thing orbiting the planet that has life signs on it???
It’d be like being at work for a long day and coming home late, to find that your little terrarium full of moss and leaves and maybe some springtails, has become a thriving society of beings that has (sadly) created capitalism, knows how to split atoms and makes SO MUCH MUSIC and a lot of it goes hard
and also they’ve been trying to communicate with you while you were gone. There’s little messages in tiny glass bottles scattered all over the floor (which they can’t even see, meaning they’ve just been throwing them out there hoping someone would find them)
tbh Cybertronians are not nearly as afraid of us as they ought to be. Both our capacity for violence and greed, and our even greater capacity for hope.