Weight Loss and Nutrition @eatsleeploseweight - Tumblr Blog

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Omg. I was thinking I love the flavor of sub bread, and I wanted a dressing so bam: red wine vinegar, mayo, oregano, salt+pepper. Soooo good

Wow. Seeing that Chester Bennington of linkin park has killed himself has shook me a little. Mainly because one of their albums meant a lot to me. Back when I felt really mentally horrible as a teenager, when I did not get along with my mom, linkin park was one of those bands I would blast as loud as I could. Usually i would be on the verge of a panic attack, and the music would help me a lot. I also didn't realize him and Chris Cornell were so close. Chester was The Godfather of one of chris' kids. Crazy. Two months apart.

I'd also like to note that I've officially gone down to a size 16!!! They are snug but another 5 pounds they'll be comfy :) I used to not be able to get the button closed at all and they would suffocate my belly!! Last night I threw on a pair of 16's and they fit I was so happy!! I could move around and even sit down without suffocating!! Lost another .6 since yesterday , now at 209.2 . Come on 200!!!!!!

I hit 109.8 today!!!! Love that the second number is a 0!!!! Now I'm racing to hit 200! Almost at 40lbs lost from when I started.

I like my haiiiir

On a lighter note I returned to the gym this week and went three times after about a half a year and I jumped back into weight lifting and some light HIIT .. I’ve committed to three days a week but may hit the gym on the weekends at least once :) diet wise I’m easing back into intermittent fasting and doing one low carb snack at work and one balanced meal including a carb per day :)

Work rant

I perceive myself as kind, patient, caring. Throughout my life it seems most personality types don't like me, or are very pushy with me. As someone with anxiety it's so hard to deal with someone (whether they are family or a coworker) that is nice one day, and weirdly agitated the next. I wish I could work with someone who was stable. I'm not asking for a best friend, just someone who isn't going to snap at me when they are tired or had a long day. I make it a point to treat the adults I work with the same way whether I'm tired or cranky. It makes me so anxious. Then on top of that I live with my dad and I never know what kind of treatment I'll get there either. At the end of the day it's the same old story. I can't wait to move! I can't wait to live with Tim and Liam!!! We 'get' each other and that makes life with anxiety a lot easier!!!

Got my boy's names on me 😍

Motivation

#skinnyme

4.14.17

211.2 😁

4.12.17

Hit my lowest weight today : 212.6. Intermittent fasting really works for me! Nothing about this drives me crazy and makes me go off the rails. A few days ago I started my new plan where I have a 500 calorie protein shake (whey, water and grass fed whole milk) and then whenever I'm hungry or it's convenient to eat, I have a 900 calorie meal. I try to hold off on my shake until at least 10 AM. I find that allows me to eat my dinner close enough to the evening that hunger does not strike before bed. Some people lose super fast on IF, others can take a couple of years to reach their goals. What I do know about myself is that this is something I can stick to. That's why I will be successful no matter when I reach my goals. I also love that I can tweak the foods I eat whenever I want. I'm trying to count calories the best I can right now but sometimes I need to wing it. One of my short term goals is to start having prepped/cooked meats in the freezer labeled with the calorie count, ready to be defrosted and heated. My goal is to make 15 servings at a time. If I eat other things on the weekends, that's 3 weeks of meals mostly prepped, all that's needed is a side carb and maybe a special sauce or veggie. After flip flopping for so long with should I be keto? Should I just count calories? I've finally been doing something that is not only sustainable but is actually working! Long before the scale started budging I could see and feel a difference in my body. I've been doing this now for a couple months with some times here and there that I've over eaten or maybe went a few days without IFing at all. But I've been consistent for a few days now, at around 1400 calories so I'm going to stick to this. Can't wait to make a post that says I've hit the 100's!!!!

#goals #fuckyeah

I've been grappling with all the low carb food items I have purchased . I have not been low carb lately. I came up with an idea today though. Lately I've been doing intermittent fasting. I eat all my calories within a certain time frame , usually 4 hours and only 0 calorie fluids the rest of the day. My idea is to eat keto for a full week, and then do a 3-7 day psmf (protein sparing modified fast), then a few more days of keto eating, then go back to my normal balanced eating for a couple of weeks. This plan is revolved around doing a round of psmf, which is when you're eating mostly protein to fill up your calories. I could also eat low carb veggies with a low fat sauce on them, or salads/veggies with vinegar. Mostly low fat meats, and maybe some low fat cheese, cottage cheese or yogurt (which I normally wouldn't eat).. this would give me the chance to use up some of my keto food, but it would also allow keto and psmf not stressful knowing I can go back to my laid back balanced macros for a couple weeks out of the month. The most fat loss will happen during the psmf. You need to eat 30g of fat per day for proper organ function. Some people will go that low doing psmf but I'll probably stick to 50 or 60. About 10 carbs so basically any carbs will b from the veggies I eat. When I do psmf I will prob be doing one meal a day so I can be satisfied. The detox tea really helps too. It's just herbs that have an effect of hunger suppression. I think this plan will light a fire under this weight loss and get things moving. It also keeps me sane so that makes it sustainable. Either way I'm come to terms that intermittent fasting is the way for me regardless of what macros I'm going for. It allows me to eat a lot at once. If I get to satisfy myself to the point of fullness once in the day, I can last much longer without feeling hungry. It's really just a tool to facilitate a caloric deficit. Also, when going low carb it will be great because my macros would allow one full potato as part of me meal instead of only a few carbs per meal. 😄

Work rant

Thank god it's the weekend cause the temptation to quit my job is in full force today. Seeing Liam cry n sad at school I hate it. I am meant to be a stay at home mom!!!! I want to be with my son. I want to pay attention to him!! I don't want someone snapping at him every time he does something out of place. I feel this need to save up more money but I'm not sure if it's worth it . I feel like if I leave here I have well enough money to have fun times during the summer and then just try to find a better preschool (and maybe part time work) for the school year. This daycare is shitty in many ways. Liam is a smart kid but his intelligence is not nourished here at all! If I'm going to tolerate being away from him I would like him to at least me stimulated!! I like to think he has fun moments throughout the day. Yet now that I realize he doesn't nap most of the time it makes me feel like he's unhappy and bored from 12-2 pm. This kid has been alive for FOUR FUCKING YEARS. Yet his teacher makes them make their beds themselves n doesn't help anyone fall asleep. I don't give a fuck what age the child is, as a daycare worker u need to tend to the needs of each child. I'm sure he would pass out if someone rubbed his back for 5 mins. I want this place to be part of my memory. I don't even know if I want to wait two months to quit.

#ugh

I take it back. My boss is not the nicest boss I have ever had. I think she's actually lacking in some very important ways in order to run a business effectively. She's been gradually giving me more n more attitude. I do my job diligently while there are others that slack. I'm over it. Putting in my notice on June 1st. That will give me a couple weeks before my summer vacation to relax n be able to get ahead of myself with cleaning n organizing. I'll prob find a babysitting gig for the summer and either find a new daycare or a nanny gig for the school year.

I'm working on a master list of foods that I like that dont involve a lot of carbs. This time going keto, I do not want to track macros. I want to eat smart. I want there to be veggies in my diet and not eat TOO much fat. There will be the days I crave a microwaved concoction of salami and cheese, and maybe when I wanna go all out and make spinach dip and eat it w a damn spoon. So this list includes it all. I want a reference to use when I'm feeling like what do I eat?! Stuffed mushrooms - cheese jalapeño proscuitto Spinach dip - spinach cream cheese parmesan mozzerella salt pepper cream artichokes (eat w celery or spoon!! Cheesey mushroom chicken w spinach Hot dogs brocolli cheese sauce Kielbasa, cabbage and make pierogis with mashed cauliflower in blanched mustard leaves/ chard/ olive leaf Salami n American cheese Cheese shell tacos Bunless burgers Steak or pork w mashed cauliflower and mushroom gravy Soft boiled eggs, scrambled w American, deviled, hollidaise sauce Casseroles w veggie and/or meat, dairy and covered in pork rinds n butter Zoodles w alfredo, zoodles w garlic butter sauce (w shrimp!), cucumoodles w peanut sauce Stir fry w Asian veggies and shrimp or chicken thigh Salmon with lemon, mayo and parmesan Any other fish with butter Tuna salad Salmon, crab, mackerel or tuna cakes with tartar sauce Cold cuts Cheeseburger casserole, chop meat Onion cheese top w fixings Beanless chili w sour cream Chicken soup w cream cheese Buffalo chicken dip Green bean casserole w pork rinds n parm Green giant veggie tots Brussels sprouts w bacons bits n pieces n onion n garlic Cauliflower salad - steamed cauliflower mayo bacon green onion pepper salt teaspoon vinegar Cauli pancakes, with brocolli and or onion and cheese Cream cheese, whey and egg pancakes w butter Minute cake or muffin Cheesecake Avocado Chicken wings Ribs Bacon Breakfast sausage Spicy sausage Hobbit pizza Salad w 1000 island or blue cheese spaghetti squash Turmeric and butter cauliflower Garlic burnt broccoli Spicy fried cabbage Peanut butter n celery

Somehow even a Christmas gift can turn into an opportunity for my dad to be a douche. He's completely nuts. Oh hey hunny I got a free iPhone 7 with this crazy purchase I made today (which was the third change in plans of what we r doing w my phone plan) and I'm gonna give it to u for Christmas! Oh great cool.. some back handed comment about how I should set up automatic bill pay to his account so he doesn't have to 'chase' me for money .. claims I didn't want to get my own phone plan, I remind him I would totally and I was about to sign up for one next week. Starts going on some tangent about how oh well I guess I could just give this iPhone to Gloria, or bring it back.. I thought you'd want it and be so happy yada yada yada (getting aggressive) .. I don't understand why he needs to respond to statements I don't make, or put words in my mouth. Why does he need to change his mind constantly and drag me along with the twists and turns. This is precisely why I should get my own plan so I don't need to deal w his crazy!!! It's bad enough that I have to live here. He acts like if I want my own plan that I can't have the iPhone 7 . So now I'm stuck in his plan, transferring money to his account instead of having my own shit? What if he decides he wants the phone back? I wouldn't put it past him he is nuts. Even the offer of a Christmas present puts a bitter taste in my mouth. And to be so proud that he got it for free, and then hint that he will just give it to my spoiled rotten sister . What an ass hat! Him and my sister should both fuck off with the Christmas presents! They are assholes to me all year and feel like they can balance their conscience each year with a Christmas present. I don't give a fuck. I can buy my own piece of crap phone, or shell out the monthly payment for a fancy iPhone. I'd rather go it alone at this point then deal with this!! It's conversations like these that make me dread living here for another two + years. My dad is incapable of having a normal conversation with me. I don't know what about me makes him so crazy but it makes me very uncomfortable hence why I try to avoid him!!!! I hope I see the day where I can live with just Tim and Liam. Life will never be perfect but that sounds much closer to perfect.

Going back to keto/low carb in January. Going to prepare for it for now. Slowly weeding out some high carb items and enjoying the holidays without caring too much. I've been getting pulled towards reading about keto meals or people's successes lately and it's awakening an urge to do it and do it right this time. I never gave it an honest go. I would always end up cheating every couple of weeks, or when I would pms go on a crazy French fry binge! I wanna give that 6-9 week adaption period a real chance! After the first month of very low carb, I am leaning towards doing carb ups 1-2 times a week as a blogger called healthful pursuit suggests. She says especially for women, eating some carbs at your last meal can help nourish a drained adrenal or thyroid, amongst other problems. As I remember she said this can be anywhere from 20-100 carbs in one sitting. So, a small baked potato or a serving size of rice. First though I want to give my body a chance to adapt to low carb living. I wanna do it sort of gradually at first with no set rules. For instance I may start out by eliminating wheat products and anything containing processed sugar, and then next eliminate carbs at dinners etc. I'm going to stick with having about 10-15 carbs at breakfast because it makes me feel good. So, a slice of Ezekiel.. or some milk in my coffee, whatever works with what else I'm eating. This is something I have to do. I want to go all in and not half ass it like last time. Once I do, I'll know if it's right for me to do a bit longer, or if I'd prefer to add some carbs back into my day. The best part about it is that through this year of learning, I feel very liberated from rules and boundaries when it comes to what I eat. I don't feel the need to view a set of rules that another person has made. I'm not going to psychotically record every ingredients macros to a recipe and then divide it based on how much I'm eating. I'm going to eat a reasonable amount of food, when I see fit and snack on keto friendly foods when I feel like it! I'll always have pickles ! My zero calorie friends. And if I'm pmsing hard I can let myself eat yummy keto foods instead of feeling like I need to hide in my car n shove fries down my throat. It doesn't have to be black and white, like i either an in the perfect caloric deficit or I am eating $15 of Burger King and have thrown everything out the window. There is a happy ground there where I can cover sausage patties with cheese and eat them with lillys chocolates in my bed to my hearts delight. Sometimes that needs to be done!!!! But for the most part I want to try to eat intuitively. Feel out the proper amounts and try on most nights to go to bed hungry. I always feel healthier then next day when I go to bed on an empty stomach. This time around I want keto/low carb to be about health repair.. not weight loss. The weight loss can be a nice side effect.

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