What if everything comes to an end?
What if all feelings fade eventually?
What if there is no true love, no soul mates, no twin flames…
What if everything I’ve ever wanted isn’t real?
I had this innate feeling as a teenager; that marriage was a farce. But that came more from self loathing, thinking no one would want forever with me. Once I experienced real love, however, I tucked that idea away. I thought maybe the fairytales were true. I no longer hated myself.
But I finally found someone who I was so sure about. And that’s the thing… I’ve always been able to trust myself. I’ve always known, deep down inside, when I was in my past relationships that they wouldn’t be forever.
This time, I really thought he was forever.
But my feelings have changed. Continue to change, bit by bit, every day. How does that just happen? It’s not fair. How will I ever know? That’s the question. And I think the answer is that you don’t know. How can we promise forever… when we don’t know.
I thought by the age of 29 that you know how things work. But I feel like everything I thought I knew is going to come crashing down around me.
