Unboxing Desires and Other Miscellanies
Chapter 2 is up!
Hope you enjoy as much as I did writing it :D

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Unboxing Desires and Other Miscellanies
Chapter 2 is up!
Hope you enjoy as much as I did writing it :D
FMAB + text posts part 🤷🏻♀️
See it's funny because it's alarmingly accurate-especially the first one. We both know that is the core of this two buffoons relationship.
9-11; MY STORY AS A CHILD WHO GREW UP CLOSE TO NEW YORK
I know it’s now 9-12 but I was working all day on the 11th and this just took me a long time to write...and I know this is now what I normally write, but I need to say what I need to say.
When I’ve had a moment to look through Facebook all I’ve seen is people expressing how they remember where they were that day, where they were the moment they found out a plane had hit the North Tower of the World Trade Center and how they felt.
I am no different I suppose-expect my story is I have no story. I was six years old on that beautiful sunny day. I was in the first weeks on Kindergarten. My school was either let out early or I was picked up early, either way my brother (who was one at the time) and I were brought home under the guise of the president giving us the day off because we were being good. It was just my dad, my brother and I until the evening because my mom’s place of employment wouldn’t let her leave early (just let that sink in for a second).
I only know this because I was told this about five years later, when my mom sat me down with a magazine that had the face of Osama Bin Ladin on it. I still remember that picture and the chills it gave me. I was lucky. I was sheltered. And yet despite that the horror of the day still haunts not just my life but all of our lives twenty years later. I was in Learning Center with twins who lost their father that day, and I’m sure they were far from the only kids I shared the halls with who lost someone. I spent what must amount to hours in lines waiting to get through airport security, holding my breath as I was being patted down almost every single time (a consequence of being short my pants bunch at my. ankles) and as they searched through my bag at least once (all I have was medication for a sinus infection). I know that’s more than what people of color and especially Middle Eastern people have had to endure, but it’s still unnerving having someone put their fingers in your hair because you chose to wear it up.
My country has been at war for the majority of my life and I have had the privilege of being blissfully unaware despite having family in the military…. I don’t know how to feel about that fact.
My friends in college probably know this, but I live in a town in Connecticut that is 30 miles from New York City-in fact my town in more or less a suburb of Manhattan. Whenever someone says they’re going to the city we all know they’re talking about New York. I’ve gone there at least once a year since I was six years old-the first time being three months after the attack to see The Nutcracker.
I’ve actually see The World Trade Center, both in its ruins and as it was being built again.
I was ten years old when I first went down there on a bus tour with my grandmother. We were doing touristy things that had included climbing to that top of the Empire State Building and in that moment we were bus a tour. The bus took us to a ditch/crater that was surrounded by a blue fence. People were walking around in there, what they were doing I’ll never know and I don’t think I want to know. I remember the tour guide saying “World Trade Center” and “Terrorist Attack” but those words meant nothing to me. I said nothing. All I could think was “Why are they taking us to a ditch?”
Flash forward six years later and I am all too aware of what had happened almost ten years before. I was down there again, this time standing in the middle of a world being rebuilt. I stared up a creation that was attempting to reach to the sky in defiance of the horror of that day. Beside me was the same blue fencing, where a memorial was being built in the ruins of two giants.
I remember the silence.
Despite being in the middle of Down Town Manhattan and a construction site (though no one was working at that moment) there was something eerily quiet about the place, as if the world seemed to pause and stop the moment you entered it.
The kid I was with had made comments about body parts being scattered there in an attempt to scare me. I snapped at him that it wasn’t funny-and it wasn’t funny because he was right.
People may ask why we will keep bringing up this day, after all it was more than a life time ago. I do understand people use this day as an excuse to air their ugly hatred against Muslims who do nothing but live their lives as we do. I understand people use this day to dig into their fanatical patriotism which was someone who does consider herself a proud American I can’t stand.
I understand… but I also say this to those who ask why; This day is for the people who woke up on that morning, hugged and kissed their loved ones goodbye and expected to return home after a mundane if beautiful day-whether it was in New York or in Washington D.C and never made it home. Some families never had a body to lay to rest.
This day is for the firefighters and police officers who ran to the terror and horror while others ran away (not that I judge or blame them for a single moment). They are braver than I will ever be.They risked their lives and gave the ultimate sacrifice to save as many people as they could. Whole squads and companies were lost. Not only that, this day is for those that survived and staid to dig through the rubble at the expense of their physical and mental health.
This day is for the people on those ill-fated flights, who had boarded expecting to safely reach their destination.
This day is for the people on Flight 93, who once again are braver than I will ever be. They decided to quiet literally look terror in the eye and fight back. These souls saved our country from what would have been a fourth attack on either the White House or the Capital Building, and lost their lives in the middle of an emerald field Pennsylvania.
This day is for the innocent lives that were lost, and the brave souls who tried to save others and fight back. This day is to remember them and the fact they lost their lives in such a violent and senseless way. As a matter of fact did you know survivors are still suffering to this day? The first responders who lived to tell their harrowing tale are riddled with cancer or disabled.
That is why we remember and we must, and cannot ever forget that day.
But alas it seems the country has forgotten. It seems to have forgotten how we railed together to rebuild what we lost and to support each other. Imagine what it would be like if we continued to lift each other up and support each other as we did in the days after.
Like I said… I guess despite of never vowing to forget a lot of the country did.
I leave you with this one last tid bit.
After that day my mom made it a point to always say goodbye and I love you whenever one of us leaves or parts. She makes it a point to never go to bed angry and to always say goodnight and I love you.
It all started after that day.
Hug the ones you love. Let them know you love and if you are parting even for what seems a normal day always say goodbye and I love you. You never know what will happen.
May the 3,000 souls who lost their lives continue to rest at peace with our Father above. May they and our Lord continue to watch over the ones who were left behind and the ones who survived.
May they Never. Ever. be forgotten.
ONCE UPON A TIME IN AMESTRIS: CHAPTER TWO: WHISPERINGS OF HOPE
Chapter One
AN: HELLO MY LOVELIES! SORRY THIS HAS TAKEN SO LONG. I’VE HAD A LOT HAPPEN IN THE PAST THREE MONTHS THAT I REALLY DON’T WANT TO GET INTO BUT IT’S TAKEN A LOT OUT OF ME. BUT I FINALLY REALLY READY TO PUSH ON SO HERE WE GO!
I ALSO NEVER DO THIS BUT JUST TO BE SAFE AND BECAUSE I HAVE A FEELING I’M GONNA HAVE TO DO THIS MORE THAN ONCE...
TW: FOR TALK OF ABORTION. IF THIS TOPIC MAKES YOU SENSITIVE... DON’T READ I GUESS.
DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING LADIES AND GENTS SO THANK YOU MUCH!!
CHAPTER TWO: WHISPERINGS OF HOPE
Well Ms. Hawkeye it looks like congratulations are in order. You’re pregnant.”
It was funny, Riza decided, how one sentence could throw the entire course of your life in ruin.
There had been many thoughts spiraling through Riza’s head and emotions charging through her heart after she heard those two simple words.
You’re pregnant ….
ATLA Q&A:
General questions:
1. What's your favorite character?
2. What's your comfort character?
3. Which element would you bend if you could chose?
4. What's your favorite nation?
5. What makes you love ATLA the most?
Could get you attacked questions:
1. What's your least favorite character from the gaang?
2. What character you think it's severely underrated?
3. What's your least favorite nation?
4. What's your controversial ATLA opinion?
Shipping questions:
1. What's your favorite ship and why?
2. What's your least favorite ship and why?
3. Do you sometimes self-insert?
4. What's your crack ship?
5. Which non canon ship would you make happen if you were the creator?
Anybody can do it and you can chose if you want just one section. You can skip a question if you don't like it or don't find it interesting.
The answers can be as detailed as you want them to be.
I tag: @rainyturtlecollector @kataanger04 @kataang @katara-waterbender-master @avatarfandompolice @aangs-love @blueclaw7 @coconutsaiyan @cosmic-hoodie29 @flameohotfamily @fulldragonflowerpatrol @leg-grestrade @leekataang @marigamismoon @queenaleesbiggestfan-writes
ATLA Q&A:
General questions:
1. What's your favorite character?
Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe baby!!
2. What's your comfort character?
Katara. I see so much of myself in her. And while I'm as white as white gets, my hair is just like hers and having grown up in an area where most of the kids I went to school with were blonde, it would have made me feel more comfortable with myself as kid. Too bad I was too stubborn to give it a chance back then.
3. Which element would you bend if you could chose?
Water!
4. What's your favorite nation?
Water.... again.
5. What makes you love ATLA the most?
This is such a hard question to answer. I think the first thing that always has to attract me-especially with a story that is kind of action and fight based-is the characters and the story. More or less there has to be substance beyond cool action and fight scenes, and thankfully Avatar is full of substance. It's plot about war, love, life and loss is just amazing.
Could get you attacked questions:
1. What's your least favorite character from the gaang?
If I HAD to pick... Suki. Now that doesn't mean I don't like her because I really do, but just not as much as the other four.
2. What character you think it's severely underrated?
Suki! I feel like she is severely underrated not just in the fandom at times but even with in the show. I get the creators only had so much time and a lot of story to fit in that time but I would have loved to see her more utilized and explored.
3. What's your least favorite nation?
God help my for saying this but the Air Nation. There's just something about both the nation and the element that just doesn't interest me as much as water, earth and fire.
4. What's your controversial ATLA opinion?
1: Even though Azula is clearly a victim of her father, it was clear she had those cold, violent and cruel tendencies to begin with. She's just not a good person and did horrible and unforgivable things-yes things worse than Zuko. There is a big difference between Zuko being lost and doing what he did out of a desperation to go home and have his "honor" back again and Azula taking over cities, threatening to kill people left and right and manipulating them... I could go on. Yeah I don't like her and I didn't from the beginning. I personally don't she deserves or needs a redemption arc.
2: Ursa was not and is not a bad mother. I think she was stuck in a terrible situation. She was forced to marry a monster who is abusive at least emotionally (I can't remember any physical abuse but it wouldn't shock me if it was there). Azula was a troubled child-she was even hurting animals as we can see from when Zuko showed Ursa how she "feeds" the ducks. Do I think Ursa could have not said things "What is wrong with that child?" Yes. Do I think she should have, for instance, praised Azula for her demonstration of her skills in front of their grandfather like she did Zuko? Yes. However she was also the ONLY one who tried to set boundaries with Azula and attempted to teach her right from wrong. She may have made mistakes, but I have no doubt in my heart that she was trying to help Azula.
On a side note I don't think her erasing her memory was selfish. Sure of being able to still see her kids in secret was nice, but I can't imagine how much it would hurt to only be able to see your kids in the shadows, to be not be able to hold them and let them know you're there and still love them. Plus combine that with all the trauma Ozai put her through... I don't blame her.
Shipping questions:
1. What's your favorite ship and why?
Are we talking cannon ships? If we're talking cannon ships than Aang x Katara. From the beginning there is an earnest, sweet and sincere quality about their relationship. I love that they start as friends and they build such deep trust with each other. I love it. Plus their family (while yes flawed as so many families are) is adorable.
If we're talking semi cannon/ who the hells really knows besides the creators but I don't care either way ships, Tokka all the way. Again I love that they start out not just as friends butt hey have one of the best friendships in the show. They're chemistry is amazing and it's obvious Toph has a not so little crush on them. I will add though I approve of their ship when they're OLDER-like they're bot over 18 older, just because Toph is 12 in the show and Sokka is 15.
And before you say anything no for some reason the age difference between Aang and Katara doesn't bother me as much, don't ask me why I don't really know.
2. What's your least favorite ship and why?
Before I begin I just want to say this is my opinion and I respect people's ships even if I don't personally like them or agree with them. Now with that said...*Inhales deeply* Zultara. I don't really like Zultara. *ducks to avoid flames coming my way* It's not that I don't see the potential of the ship, and its' not that they don't have their moments because they do. The reason I don't like them as a ship is because of their history. Zuko was pretty horrible to Katara, constantly attacking her and her brother and Aang and HOW many times did he call her a peasant? And let's not forget he did send someone to KILL them? I understand that he grows and changes and becomes the good person is always was, but as someone who was bullied horrendously by someone people used to joke I was going to marry, I'm not a fan of that kind of dynamic.
3. Do you sometimes self-insert?
Nope, because I'm 26 and they're all teenagers so no thank you.
4. What's your crack ship?
I don't really have one, it's just not something I even considered.
5. Which non canon ship would you make happen if you were the creator?
Tokka!!!!! Tokka! TTTTTTTOOOOOOKKKKAAAA!! Okay so it's not necessarily "non cannon" per say and if you ask me I totally think Suyin is Sokka's daughter and SOMETHING had to have happened between them. However since because as far as the show and comics go anything outside of Toph's little crush is only implied really... I'm just going with it.
So yeah... Tokka!!!
Anybody can do it and you can chose if you want just one section. You can skip a question if you don't like it or don't find it interesting.
The answers can be as detailed as you want them to be.
~ FMA 20 Questions ~
Feel free/please shoot me an ask with any of these!
1.) What type of Alchemy would you use?
2.) What would your state alchemist codename be?
3.) Would you serve in the military?
4.) Alchemist/Engineer/Soldier?
5.) Would you commit the taboo?
6.) Favorite character?
7.) brOTP?
8.) OTP?
9.) Which theme song do you find yourself singing the most/the catchiest?
10.) FMA or FMAB?
11.) nOTP?
12.) Character you’re most like/relate to?
14.) Who (which character) do you look the most like?
15.) Black Hayate or Den?
16.) Favorite deadly sin?
17.) Who would you want as your parents?
18.) Who would you want as your child(ren)?
19.) Part that made you cry the most?
20.) Least favorite character?
21.) Your favorite FMA AU?
(Guess who forgot 13; this loser -_-’)
OOO! I think I shall do to introduce myself to the FMA fandom, as I haven’t really be active in this fandom… at all and I think it’s a fun way to get to know people.
1.) What type of Alchemy would you use?- Probably a water or earth kind’ of alchemy.
2.) What would your state alchemist codename be?- The Sea Alchemist… -_- I’m not very good at this whole naming thing.
3.) Would you serve in the military?- Ummmm…. Probably not. I’m not cut out for the military. They probably wouldn’t want me anyway :3
4.) Alchemist/Engineer/Soldier?- Alchemist :D
5.) Would you commit the taboo?- Depending on who passed away, I may be tempted, but in the end I wouldn’t do it.
6.) Favorite character?- 0_0 Too… hard
7.) brOTP?- Either Mustang and Hughes or Edward and Ling.
8.) OTP?- Flip flops between Edwin and Royai
9.) Which theme song do you find yourself singing the most/the catchiest?- Number Five!!
10.) FMA or FMAB?- Both, I like both. I think as a whole FMAB is the better between the two but there’s A LOT to enjoy about FMA. That’s a whole different post for another time though
11.) nOTP?- Edward and Roy -_- I’m sorry but no.. just no
12.) Character you’re most like/relate to?- Hmmm… I would have to say Winry, minus the engineering but I have a lot of Ed in me…in the sense that I’m a shorty and I tend to be very sensitive about it… and I do get very annoyed when people point it out.
14.) Who (which character) do you look the most like?- Uh…. I look like Winry but with dark wavy/curly hair (like Rebeca) and dark eyes.
15.) Black Hayate or Den?- I shall not choose between two dogs. :/
16.) Favorite deadly sin?- Gluttony or Sloath… in many ways I am the epitome of both.
17.) Who would you want as your parents?- Edward and Winry or Roy and Riza!
18.) Who would you want as your child(ren)?- Al, Ed and Winry
19.) Part that made you cry the most?- Hughes being burried… Nina when her dad got killed by Scar
20.) Least favorite character?- Father or Tucker
21.) Your favorite FMA AU? I… don’t know any… yet :3
Welcome to the fandom!!
Thank you!!! Can’t wait to finally be a little active in the fandom! :3
So I did this post about five years ago if memory serves me, and I thought it would be fun to see if any of my opinions have changed.
Please feel free to put your own answers! Original post is in this thread.
1.) What type of Alchemy would you use?- Water or Earth I think.
2.) What would your state alchemist codename be?- The Siren probably because of my singing.
3.) Would you serve in the military?- I am 5'1 and extremely overweight and my athletic ability I have any skill or stamina in is swimming so even if I wanted to they wouldn't take me. But I also don't want to.
4.) Alchemist/Engineer/Soldier?- Alchemist!
5.) Would you commit the taboo?- I've experienced a lot of loss since the last time I did this post and I can tell you as much as it hurts I wouldn't commit it.
6.) Favorite character?- Roy Mustang. I got a kitten about two and half months ago and I freaking named him Roy.
7.) brOTP?- Hughes and Mustang and Edward and Ling.
8.) OTP?- Royai supremacy all the way-with Edwin right behind them.
9.) Which theme song do you find yourself singing the most/the catchiest?- Gun to my head number five or number two.
10.) FMA or FMAB?- FMAB all the way. There's a lot of good concepts in FMA and it has a stronger opening section but it goes off the rails as it goes on. Plus that ending REALLY pissed me off. I just enjoy Brotherhood's tight plot and the ending is just perfection. It's what keeps me coming back.
11.) nOTP?- Edward and Roy because obvious reasons. Also just for good measure Edward and Al because they are literal brothers.
12.) Character you’re most like/relate to?- I know this has changed as I've gotten older. I definitely still see a lot of Winry in myself (obsessive, bubbly) and I still got some Edward in me (the ambition, the determination, the short temper and hatred of short jokes and people pointing out their short), but I've gotten older I see more and more of myself in Riza. First of all I've always been the mother of the group like she is, despite my outwardly bubbly personality I'm very introverted and serious and as a Taurus I am stubborn as hell. I don't know I've just grown to see a lot of myself in Riza.
14.) Who (which character) do you look the most like?- Again now that I'm an adult I would say mostly Riza with some features from Rebbca thrwon in-when I am healthy weight my body shape is the same as hers, my face shape is the same, our eyes are the same color, I have a little nose like she does... the major difference is I have dark curly hair like Rebecca and unlike Riza my eyes are trash so I need glasses.
15.) Black Hayate or Den?- How freaking dare anyone make me choose between two dogs?!! I will NEVER!!!
16.) Favorite deadly sin?- Favorite? Well I guess Greed and Envy as they have the best character arcs. If we're talking about which Sloth and Gluttony.
17.) Who would you want as your parents?- Edward or Winry seem like they would be fun parents.
18.) Who would you want as your child(ren)?- Al and Winry because for how much of a good bean Edward is I feel sorry for anyone remotely in charge of him.
19.) Part that made you cry the most?- Hughes being buried and when Winry opens the door and see the brother's with their bodies again.
20.) Least favorite character?-Tucker and Pride.
21.) Your favorite FMA AU? I guess an AU where Roy and Riza don't have to worry about fraternization laws and can just be a happy couple with a beautiful home and children and live the happy life they deserve but don't think they do? I haven't really gotten into any AU's to this day.
YOU'RE TURN!!!
When everyone's going through ship wars but you're a multi shipper so nothing happens to you
Give me all the Royai and EdWin and Al x Mei and Lingx Lang Fan....GIVE IT ALL TOO ME!!!
turns out you just never get over royai. i’m still as hopelessly in love with these two as i was the first time i watched fmab
Well more like six but you get the point
Everyone should know the international sign for Help Me. Let’s make this famous!!
Interesting; I didn't know this was a thing.
It’s apparently a thing, but it’s a very new thing, so it may need some help being known.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Signal_for_Help
The scene that made me laugh the hardest from episode 5
I hope they dub this shit....I really do
FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST BIRTHDAYS AND ZODIACS
Hello my lovelies! So this is a result of me making a timeline and list of people's ages for the story I'm working on, and after I noticed there were no official birthdays for the characters I used my growing interest in astrology to come up with whatever the hell this is.
Just be aware that I am not doing ALL the characters, most of it is random, and with some of these characters I'm just guessing their ages and will probably be WWWAAAYY of but MEH... I tried
Please chime in what you would think and give your opinion if you have one! I'm really curious.
Edward:
February 3rd, 1899:
This was the only technically official birthday I could find. This would make Edward and Aquarius which uh I can attest from having an Aquarius Grandmother is accurate. He's stubborn, extremely hot tempered, extremely intelligent, a big thinker, closed off emotionally... the list goes on.
Winry:
December 3rd, 1899:
Winry just SCREAMS Sagittarius. She is bubbly, independent (I read somewhere about them loving freedom) and optimistic. Obviously everyone is their own person with their own personality by most of the Sagittarius's I've met have been just as wonderful and as she is. Plus fun fact the date I chose is Amanda Seyfried's birthday, who could have pass for Winry when she was younger.
Alphones:
July 3rd, 1900 (side note I didn't mean to pick a lot of threes... just an accident): There is a simple reason I think Alphones is a Cancer, and that is mainly because he reminds me of the Cancers I know if my life-which basically means he is the kindest and softest cinnamon role. He's definitely doesn't fit the stereotype of Cancers bring the cry baby's of the Zodiacs but he is definitely more emotional and just all around softer than Edward. He's also loyal and protective and can be just a moody as Edward. My Grandfather, who I never got to meet was a Cancer and that's where I got the birthday from.
Roy:
April 14th, 1885: Besides the obvious fact that Aries is a fire sign.... I'm just gonna leave this brief description;
"Aries are entrepreneurial, independent and creative. They have the nerve to get things started and can be inspiring leaders. Their crackling energy is infection, and they are children at heart, buzzing with the force of life itself."
I rest my case
Riza
May 13th, 1889
I'm a Taurus myself and the birthday I chose is my own if my user name wasn't a give away (I know I know), but to be frank I do a little Taurus qualities. She's very kind and soft hearted despite being very reserved, very down to Earth, saying she's loyal is an understatement, is a hard worker, intimidatingly angry when provoked, and this is the big one-admittedly stubborn. She is very much a girl after my own heart.
Maes
August 4th, 1889
This man... this beautiful... beautiful man... radiates the best qualities of a Leo. As I did with his counter part and best buddy Roy I'm just gonna leave a brief description of a Leo's personality;
"Like a crackling fire, Leo's tend to be warm, passionate, and dynamic. They delight in opportunities to let their charismatic, inclusive personality shine. And like the lion that represents them Leo's are also strong, brave and ready to dominate everything they set out to do."
And I can't believe I'm saying this but can we get an F in the chats for this beautiful man who deserved so much better.
I wanted to do more but I opened my computer yesterday and saw cracks that weren't there before and I wanted to get this out so maybe a part two?
s
ONCE UPON A TIME IN AMESTRIS-CHAPTER ONE-THE ATOM BOMB
~ONCE UPON A TIME IN AMESTRIS~
~CHAPTER ONE~
~THE ATOMIC BOMB~
I love how people in the Avatar Universe tend to resemble a grandparent
and I also noticed
but, that’s just what I think
HEART OF STONE-CHAPTER ONE-LIGHTWEIGHT
PROLOUGE
~CHAPTER ONE~
~LIGHTWEIGHT~
“What is the status on the Huang gang?” Toph barked, sitting tall and erect behind her large wooden desk. The young, embarrassingly green cadet put a valiant effort into mimicking her stoic stance. No amount of effort could hide his racing blood and his pounding heart. Toph could sense it all. Had she been closer to him she could have even sensed the heat radiating from his cheeks. She could hear his clumsy fingers crinkling a piece of paper as his breath hitched.
It took every ounce of self-control for Toph not to smirk or let out a horrendous snort.
“Poor kid must be quaking in his boots.” She silently mused as she cleared her throat. Her fingers curled around themselves and rested under her chin. Her milky eyes bore him down, and she could only imagine his squirming figure growing tighter as the seconds ticked.
“I’m waiting Officer Chen.” She drawled. The young officer jumped, papers fumbling in his clammy fingers.
“Yes Chief my apologies Chief.” Chen paused, clearing his throat and straightening the papers in his hands.
“They’ve either been very quiet or have gone way underground. We’ve been keeping an eye on them, even having plain clothed officers scout their usual stomping grounds. There’s been a suspicious drop in activity… an alarming drop.”
Toph leaned back in her chair and nodded. She brought her pale, surprisingly dainty fingers to her lips, letting the information settle in her head.
The Huang Gang had, once upon a time, started as a group of misfit benders. They were down on their luck and had resorted to menacing the public to survive. Such activities including robbing, mugging… the usual illegal tom foolery. There was a disturbing darkness to their malice though. It was all tinged with the taste of hatred and vengeance. Even in their early disjointed early days their favorite targets had been fire benders and above all, non benders.
Toph felt her stomach drop. It seemed no matter how hard she, Aang, Zuko or anyone tried the rift between benders and non-benders refused to give way. Toph mercifully had bene able to contain the band of unhinged troublemakers, even as they grew and ever more coordinated.
How she had managed to underestimate them to such an alarming degree Toph would never know. Right under her nose the Huang’s ballooned into the largest, most systematic crime organization in Republic City. Their childish days of malice and menacing had dissented into terrorizing. The horror they inspired reach far and wide, stitching their way into the fabric of every citizens life. They lurked in the shadows, struck with no mercy and vanished with the wind back into the darkness.
Toph could only sigh and marvel at how much of a pain in her ass the Huang’s had become.
“Alarming is right.” Toph conceited, her pretty features screwing with aggravation. “It could mean nothing, but I don’t trust them for one second. They’re up to something and up to something big. Continue to send plain clothed officers under cover. We have to figure out what they’re doing and stop them before they can do it-understood?”
“Yes chief!” Chen barked with a click of his heels and a stiff salute.
“Good. Now one more thing-what time is it?” There was a pause as Chen’s black eyes glanced to the lonely clock hanging on the wall.
A strange piece of décor for a blind woman, he noted.
“It’s 3:30.”
“Oh man!” Toph cried, leaping out of her chair. “I need to go.” Officer Chen hurdled towards the wall, his face twisted with incredulity.
“If I may be permitted, why are you leaving so early?” He asked, gawking at her as she bustled towards the door. “It’s not like you.”
“I promised Avatar Aang and Katara I would come meet their new baby.” She said, whisking past him to reach the doorknob.
“Don’t forget to tell Sargent Suzuki my orders-or else.”
“Punishment?” Chen gulped.
“Big time.” She dead panned, swinging the door open. “Have a good day.” Toph cried in an eerily high, sing-song voice that sent a chill down the young officer’s spine. She left Chen frozen in the office, pale faced and gaping.
“I don’t get paid enough for this…”
Top marched her way through the familiar halls of headquarters. Though she was demure in stature, she cut a striking figure as she strode towards the exit. Her strong, petite frame was covered in a heavy suit. It shined and gleamed in spite of the garish indoor lighting. She kept her coal colored mane twisted in a large, moon shaped bun. Jagged bangs framed her elegant alabaster features. Those features were always hard and stubborn, much like the Earth she wielded with such deadly force.
Combined with her rank, it was no surprise she was given a wide berth. Every soul he passed would greet her with a bow of the head and a curt, “Chief Beifong.”
Toph would return the deference with a short nod, ignoring the pit in her stomach.
It never mattered to how many years she had the lofty position, or how many years she would continue to serve. It never mattered that she had chosen this life-or that she reveled in the simplicity of being known as chief. The extreme deference made Toph’s skin crawl. It was so grand secret that her lives greatest passion was ordering others around and commanding respect. In fact, if Toph had been completely honest with herself, nothing on Earth gave her such a thrill and joy.
And yet….
It was one thing to bark drills at a bunch of children her own age.
It was thing to be called “Sifu Toph”.
“Chief” was another monster entirely.
Had she known she was signing up to a life of distance and cold formality she would have slapped Aang and Zuko upside the head for even suggesting she be Chief Toph Beifong.
They were desperate and she…
No matter. Toph huffed as she reconciled with the notion of another conversation explaining the difference between respect and kow towing.
Two of her closest friends had brought new life into this world, and Toph would be damned if she didn’t get to meet him.
“Leaving already Chief Beifong?” A small voice chirped. Toph moved her head to the sound of the mousey voice. She flashed a grin at the timid girl who manned the receptionist desk.
“Yup. I’m heading over to Air Temple Island.”
“Ooohhh!” The woman squealed. Toph could hear the ear-splitting smile in her voice. She bit her bottom lips, stifling a snicker of her own.
“Are you going to meet the new baby?” She asked.
“I am.” Toph exclaimed, her face splitting into a beam. The secretary sighed a dreamy, doe eyed sigh. Toph could easily imagine her eyes fluttering and a far off look on her face as she imagined a baby of her own.
“I’m so happy for them. Babies are just the most wonderful thing, aren’t they?”
Toph stiffened, her hands clasping behind her back. She twisted and fiddled with them, attempting to ignore her racing heart and the hole in her chest. She prayed her blazing cheeks hadn’t turned a beat red.
“Ah…. Yeah sure. Kids are pretty great.” Toph nodded. She could feel those soft, childish eyes bearing down on her, waiting for her to say something, anything.
“She must be new… great.” Toph groaned, beginning to rock on her heels. The air grew heavy as the secretary continued to beam and Toph rocked on her heels, her milky eyes darting all around the open lobby.
“Do you ever”
“Well would you look at the time! I gotta go home and change before I miss the ferry. I’ll see you tomorrow… uuuhhh….. uhhhh….
“Sakura…”
“Oh right Sakura!! Sorry about that hun.” Toph spun on the palm of her feet and dashed out the door into the sunlight. She left another soul gawking, blinking and utterly baffled in her wake.
“What just happened?”
Toph’s air of authority refused to melt, even in the bright late May sun. Her shoulders remained erect, her head held high and her steps measured. It didn’t matter that the smooth sidewalk threatened to char her bare feet, or that the sun seemed hell bent on boiling her alive in her metal uniform. While she was on the streets the people would know who she was, and that she was always there.
Still… her esteemed position and respect she commanded didn’t mean Toph couldn’t enjoy herself.
Toph released her twirling fingers and hung her arms lose by her side. Her skilled hands naturally went to her hips. Her posture slowly withered as the sun warmed her face. She sucked a deep breath, letting the sweet air fill her lungs.
No matter how much Toph would have wanted to, she could never take in her beloved Republic City. She could never see the buildings creeping towards the sky. She could never witness the people bustling around her, creating new lives for themselves. She couldn’t even view the streets beneath her bare feet or the sapphire sky above her.
Yet the Chief of Police couldn’t help but grin. She may not have been able to see the fruits of her labor; but they were all around her as she moved through the streets she knew so well.
She could hear the voices swirling around her, many of them filled with laughter and airy join despite what hid in the shadows. She could hear horses and carriages clacking down the road, the beasts scent wafting in her nose. She heard the merchants bellowing and children screeching with delight. The sweet scent of flowers and late spring air trickled her nose.
Toph’s lips curled into a triumphant, cocky smirk. The signs of a well fought, well-earned peace was all around her. It didn’t matter she couldn’t see the results of her tireless efforts. She could smell it, she could hear it and she could feel it in the earth beneath her feet.
It was enough to make Toph puff out her chest. The Huang’s be damned. She had help forge a new era of love and peace with her own two hands and no one would take that from her. She let out a contented sigh as she rounded the corner to her apartment. Her heart began to flutter as she opened the door, her stomach flipping and twisting. She felt her cheeks flush as she weaved through the halls, her fingers tingled with anticipation.
“I hope he’s home.” She thought, curling her fingers around the smooth doorknob and twisting it open.
“Hello?” Toph cried, stepping into the doorway. There was beat of silence, making Toph’s chest tight. She held her breath, waiting for the sound she so desperately longed to hear.
“I’m in the bedroom!” A melodic tenor cried. Toph’s heart exploded with sheer bliss, her lips twisting in an ear to ear grin. She dashed towards the bedroom and let the door slam behind her. She could feel her cheeks flushing as her feet pounded on the hard floor.
Toph bounded into the door frame. She slammed her foot hard on the floor, allowing her to take in the outline of the sparse, open bedroom. Her lips curled when she saw a thin figure sitting crossed legged in the middle of a large bed. His shoulders were hunched over what she could only assume was a well-loved sketch book.
“Whatcha doing there Kanto?” She asked. Kanto’s thin lips curled at the corners, his eyes twinkling with satisfaction.
“Drawing. What else would I be doing?”
“Oh I don’t know.” Toph mused, slinking towards the bed. She took her spot next to him, snaking her arm around his shoulder and pulling him in close. She ran her fingers through his silky, ebony waves. Kanto chuckled, placing his lips against her temple.
“Okay what’s going on? You’re home early and you’re being oddly affectionate.”
“What are you talking about? I’m always loving and affectionate!” Toph retorted, kissing his high cheek bone.
“Uh huh you keep telling yourself that. Now spill-what’s gotten into you?” Kanto questioned.
“There’s nothing to spill Mr. Fancy Pants. It’s a beautiful day, and I finally get to go meet Aang and Katara’s baby.”
Kanto groaned, twisting his frame out of Toph’s arms. His hazel eyes turned back to his sketch, his face twisting with disgust. Toph leaned back, her blood turning cold at his hateful moan.
“Good lord how many does that make-20?!” He exclaimed, rolling his eyes.
“Three. They have three!” Toph snapped. She rose her hand and smacked the back of his head. “Don’t be such a smart ass about it.”
“They’re trying to rebuild and entire culture you jack ass” The words staid firmly in her thoughts, though the burned hotter than any flame.
“Yeah well you don’t need to be so violent!” He moaned, holding his smarting skull. Besides three kids is three kids too many if you ask me.” Kanto claimed as he smoothed the back of his head. Toph stood, crossing her arms as she made her way to her closet. With a flick of her wrist and outstretched arms her metal armor flung off, clashing into place. She was left with her black pants and a plain snowy white tank top that clung to her figure.
Despite the thick, moist air Toph was chilled to the bone. The bliss she felt had vanished, being replaced with hallow numbness and a bitter taste in her mouth.
“I guess that’s one way you could look at it.” Toph muttered.
“It’s the only way to look at it!” Kanto cried, throwing his pencil to the bed. “They can and all… I guess but they’re loud and annoying and just plain disgusting. They ruin lives. I don’t understand how they can have so many.”
Toph froze, her finger hovering over her favorite emerald top. Her heart thudded and sputtered. A hard lump formed in her throat. She swallowed that lump along with the shock and awe tearing at her.
“I didn’t realize you felt so strongly about kids Kanto.” Toph’s thin fingers encased the soft fabric, whipping it off the hanger and slinging it on to her shoulders.
“Well it’s not like I’ve tried to hide it. I just think they’re not worth it. Besides I’m not really the paternal type.” He paused, turning his attention back to Toph. He eyed her with growing suspicion as she wrapped the emerald shirt around her frame.
“And since when do you care? You’re not exactly the maternal type Toph.”
Toph felt her heart fall straight to her stomach. That horrid, cold numbness enveloped her once more.
“I could be…. If I tried”
“No I’m not.” Toph consented, sniching a belt at her waist. “But Aang and Katara are my best friends and I promised I would meet him.”
There was also another, silent reason why she was going. There was a soul who needed her to keep his pieces together and keep him moving forward.
“Yeah yeah I get it. Just don’t get any ideas when you’re over there.” Kanto quipped, his lips grinning and his eyes laughing. “The last thing we need is a screaming gremlin, right?”
Toph’s shoulders went rigid and the air escaped her lungs. She stood motionless; her eyes glued to the closet. Her fingers balled into fist as the wheels in her head began to turn.
Much as she hated to admit it Kanto was right.
He was not the parental type. For all of his kindness, grand gestures and dazzling words he was far from stable. He was as free as the wind, flitting and floating to his next grand adventure with only his sketch book in hand. On the one hand Toph never minded. She was thrilled by the unending collection of stories he brought back with him. She loved the rush of anticipation of his return, or how he would take her hand and trace her fingers against his drawings. This always led to him kissing each knuckle, then her arm, then her neck and lips…
Needless to say, his returns were joyful in more ways than one.
Yet Toph despised Kanto for always flying away. No matter how she shoved her need indepence down his or any mortals throat, no matter how much the idea of a lifelong commitment resembled a ball and chains she still loathed it. She loathed how cold her bed was. She longed for his arms around hers, to feel his heartbeat against her back and his breath against her neck. She despised how he left her with nothing but her thoughts and utter silence. Kanto would never buckle down in one place and find a job that required actual talent or effort. He would never be the kind of man to change diapers in the dead of night or cuddle a wailing child back to sleep. Sleep, he claimed, was vital to the creative process and heaven help anyone who would disrupt his creative process. He would never want to have a child on his lap or a story in his hands.
More to the point, Kanto would never be the kind of man Aang or Zuko were. For all their flaws-and there were many-they had proven to be beautiful and loving fathers.
Though it was hard to admit, Kanto was also right in his assessment of her character. Toph was not the kind of woman to cuddle or sing lullabies. She was never a loving or nurturing person like Katara. Toph was loud, Toph was crude and she was all hard earth and rocky edges. She never had that ache or longing to have a tiny soul of her own to care for. The idea strangled her like a noose her neck. She could never give up her hard-fought independence and freedom-not until she drew her very last gasp of air. Then there was the unavoidable fact her job could steal her life at any moment.
What kind of life would that be for a child-a father was never around and never cared, and a mother who could be taken away at any time, and with a soul too hard to truly love?
No. Children had never been and would never be in the picture for her. Toph would be content with being the fun-loving Aunt who spoiled the children, wreaked havoc, filled their blood with all their sugar their hearts desired and vanish.
And yet… with each passing child her friends had a hole grew in her heart and only got bigger and bigger. It was dark, empty and dead. The only way that vast, frozen hole could begin to heal was if she was holding her friends’ children or heard them laugh. Only then would she feel a spark deep within her soul, something that made her want to never let go of the warmth in her arms. She wanted to be surrounded by that ecstatic, heartwarming laughter. She craved those little hands pawing at her face or their warm weight against her chest.
Toph was only 31, and Kanto was 32. There was still a chance….
Toph shook those thoughts out of her head and buried them deep in the depths of her soul. She mindlessly pulled down the hem of her shirt before turning to face Kanto. Her lips were parted in a tight, waxy smile.
“You got that right fancy pants!” Toph chirped. Kanto beamed back at her, oblivious to the war raging in her head. Toph strode forward slowly, her hips swishing in the sunlight. She took his thin, soft face in her cores. They stared deep into each other’s eyes; one pair a sunny hazel and one pair a clouded emerald. He snaked his arms around her waist and tugged her close to his chest.
“You’re all I ever need Toph.” Kanto breathed, sliding his hands up and down the dip of her waist and her hips. Despite her screaming thoughts and the ever-growing hole in her heart, Toph dug her nails into her hair and pressed his lips against hers. She refused to move until her lungs were weeping for air, praying that he would be enough to fill that ugly hole.
It only felt colder and painfully bitter as Toph went back into the sunlight.
I recently realised the Anastasia musical takes place a year before the collapse of Wall Street and the Great Depression. Dmitry and Anya escaped poverty only to become even more poor a year later.
True... but considering what happened to Russia in between then and 1945.... it’s probably for the best they got out of there.
National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
Trans Lifeline USA: 1-877-565-8860
Trans Lifeline Canada: 1-877-330-6366
The Trevor Project Hotline: 1-866-488-7386
The Trevor Project also offers texting and chat
You are an amazing person. Don’t give up on yourself.
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AASRA suicide prevention helpline India: 022 2754 6669
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines
It’s OK to seek help.
I put Baatar jr.'s glasses on older Sokka and now I want someone to tell me they don't look alike.
Because-
I mean-
Look!
I mean Baatar jr. looks like his father who happens to look a lot like Sokka.... but it's not uncommon for people to marry someone who look like a parental figure or parent. My mom did it :p