As a daydreamer with a vivid and colorful imagination, it was hard for me to put my daydreams of my fairytale man to the side. But I am.
It’s hard to truly let go, and let God work. This comes from someone who is a recovering control freak…especially when it comes to relationships. I wanted to control every aspect: the meeting, the pursuit, the conversation, and the timing. I was always told that my Mr. Right is somewhere out there. After all, there are plenty of fish in the sea. But I didn’t want just a fish… I wanted my one true love and I wanted him NOW.
I was impatient. I searched for love and acceptance in all the wrong places. I sought it out in people that continually failed me. I would often see a guy in Starbucks and think, “could he be the one?”…I mean he did have really nice hair. I did not understand why I was the girl that never had the awesome boyfriend. To be honest Mr. Right, I would pray for you every night. I remember tears running down my face because I so badly wanted to find you. I truthfully wanted that fairytale moment with you, when our eyes met from across the room and we immediately fell in love. I wanted the fireworks and the distant sound of triumphant music and even the cute little floating hearts above our heads, because I thought, “I had found the one made just for me.”
But, our Father is so faithful. He is the one for which my soul was made. I was made to love Him! I was made to continually fall more and more in love with Him everyday. So Mr. Right, in response to your letter I am waiting. I am praying for patience. I am submitting my life to God. I am growing and learning how GOOD of a Father we serve.
And you are right. We need time . I need time to be patient and completely surrender my heart to God, I need to lay it all at his feet. I need to just be with him everyday. And to respond to your question “Am I okay with never getting married?”, I will be honest and say that if you asked me that a year ago I would have said a very clear and stern, “NO!” But that has completely changed. I feel led to say this, to tell you that you do not complete me, and I CAN live without you. It is something that I have struggled with, but our God is faithful. He is the one that holds me in His hand, and loves me unconditionally. Can you love me in that way? I’m not sure I can do that just yet.
So in the waiting Mr. Right, I’m praying for you and for God to strengthen our hearts in a way only he can (Psalm 27:14). To give us patience, and understanding when everything gets confusing and complicated.
Thinking of you and praying with you.
Letter to Mrs. Right HERE
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