In this post I will be discussing Marcela and her toxic/abusive traits. There will be a mention of Armando but since this isn't the post regarding his abusive tendencies and toxic behavior in that relationship I won't really be focusing on him. I am not brushing off his behavior or painting him to be the victim. For the sake of this post I want you to keep that in mind because I won't be focusing on him, rather Marcela.
From the start of the series Marcela is an antagonist, full stop. I'm not referring to the romantic element of the story we are given but just in general.
An antagonist is usually the character used to press all the right buttons on the protagonist for the sake of pushing them. In a way they are the worst traits of the protagonist at all times, however they're not all that terrible so they aren't the story's true villain. Short words: They are the opposer or rival of the story.
She antagonizes Armando a lot, but at what point does just pushing buttons turn into abuse?
treat (a person or an animal) with cruelty or violence, especially regularly or repeatedly.
"riders who abuse their horses should be prosecuted"
We are told Marcela Valencia is in love with Armando the entire time. Her actions are justified by the ideology that women who behave this way are just passionate and deeply in love so they defend their territory and lash out because they don't want to lose the man they love and above all, wounds caused by love are justified.
Except we are shown something differently.
Marcela judges people by their looks, she is snotty, spoiled, emotionally immature/stunt, and as many say a misogynist. She looks at every woman as a competition and solely blames women for the actions that man were involved in as well(for example when Aura Maria had a relationship with Mario while he was in a relationship with Patty. She was constantly throwing remarks at Aura Maria after that. Now, I personally believe that Aura Maria is just at fault as Mario. She learned that he was in a relationship with Patty and didn't end it, instead for the sake of her ego continued to sleep with him to get back at Patty. She did have fault for that but Mario did too for taking advantage of his power in the company and being a whore.). Marcela never holds men accountable for what they do. Men have desires, men blah blah blah.
When Armando cheats on her, she does throw a fit and gets angry at him but usually her anger is imploded on the poor stupid woman who slept with Armando.
This we are shown at the start of the Novela, literally in the first couple of episodes we are told and shown this. So it isn't uncommon when we see her behave this way.
However later on we are given scenes where the disagreement that Armando and her are having aren't related to infidelity. They relate to Patricia, Betty, business deals, and so on.
It's understandable that Marcela wants to be the priority in Armando's life; the issue here is that Marcela does nothing to gain that. She demands it automatically. She demands to be his priority in everything. From the start she begins to spy on Armando, constantly wanting to know his whereabouts. She calls him every time they aren't in the same building. She expects him to answer her calls, tell her what he's doing and who with. She feels like Armando is supposed to do this because she owns him.
Take into account that at the beginning of the series Marcela is stomach-able in the romantic element. Later her lust turns into possessiveness.
Where she no longer looks at Armando as her boyfriend but an object for her to have. She sees him as a trophy that makes her look good. Marcela Valencia, the woman who manages to get Armando Mendoza, a man desired by every woman who is a womanizer, to settle down to one woman? and that woman be her, Marcela Valencia.
The problem is that we're told she is the one that is in love in the relationship however she constantly dismisses Armando's feelings, finds every excuse to be a helicopter and overbearing in his life when she can clearly tell he doesn't want that.
Their relationship is toxic and dysfunctional. They are both at fault but in this post I really want to focus on Marcela's side and her role in it.
I've been thinking a lot about Marcela and how it must be to be in a relationship like hers. Now not to get too personal on her but I have been in toxic friendships. I know what it's like to have someone gaslight you, use silent treatments as a form of punishment to make you feel guilty for calling them out, and breaking down your self-esteem. You really believe that no one will ever care for you like they do and you become depended on them and their validation.
However I don't identify myself with Marcela at all. She doesn't have low self-esteem, which cancels out that Armando's cheating deeply affects her. Marcela knows she's beautiful and desired by other men(I could be mistaking YSBLF with LFMB in this specific regard but I recall an early episode where Patty and Marce are talking about guys and Patty tells her she's desired by other men) . She thinks she's better than Betty and all the other woman that Armando has slept with and blames those woman9Not that they're so hot that he succumbed to their beauty but that they're classless women who go after men that are in relationships and that because he's a man and a woman wants to do the sinful dance with for Armando's infidelity and Armando never tells her that she's ugly, undesirable, that no one else will love her etc etc. So why does she stay with him? Is it love?
Love isn't possessive, jealous, angry, hurtful, boastful, arrogant, or selfish.
So why does she stay with him?
I already mentioned it. She views Armando as an object. A trophy of sorts that is good for her self-esteem and her image. So she takes his infidelities as just stupid flings but Armando wants to marry her so she's better than they are. Those women are just for a day or two but she's forever and that makes her a champion.
She is so stubborn that she won't let him leave. Armando essentially becomes a bird with its wings clipped and trapped in a cage for her own amusement.
Many people don't see that because to everyone else Marcela is the poor victim of Armando and his infidelities.
The episode I'm on right now shows us this dynamic. Marcela is upset and angry at Armando for his fling with Claudia(she knows it happened even though he denies it.) and they're arguing over it. They're walking in the hotel as Armando asks her if she wants them to be the main show of the event or for them to kill each other, if that's what she wants than perfect he'll oblige.
She then tells him that she asked for one head and he hasn't delivered it, that he had his fling in her company to which Armando replies "It's mine too."
"Yes it's yours too but I asked you for one head! and you haven't given it to me! You aren't going to be laughing at me! I won't allow it!" she waves her finger in his face.
"I'm not laughing at you" Armando's tone is defensive and in the background we see Cata and a guest nearing them and here's the thing that demonstrates why Marcela is the perfect example of an abuser behind closed doors.
Everyone expects and sees Armando yelling at her and telling her things but often it happens after Marcela has pushed his buttons(not saying that she didn't have a reason to be angry at him, she did) often times we see the switch between being the abuser to being the abused. While one is being abusive the other is being an reactionary abuser.
What is the difference between someone who is abusive and an reactionary abuser?
The abuser often times is the one with the upper hand and the one causing or inflicting pain on purpose while the reactionary is reacting to the abuse in an a way that is abusive.
For example here Marcela is demanding for him to do what she told him to do and that she won't permite for him to laugh at her. The day has been a bad one for Armando so he is tense and already in a bad mood as he talks to Marcela.
However Marcela wants things done her way, despite knowing that Armando's hands are tied with Claudia the model he had a fling with, and that Armando doesn't want to fire his assistant. She expects and demands for him to do what she told him to do and she won't let him get away with not doing it.
What does this mean? Enter the space of reading between the lines. Hearing a phrase like that and understanding the context is a very vital and important bit. Let's reverse the gender roles here for a bit. If a man told a woman "You aren't going to be laughing at me! I won't allow it!" while waving their finger in their face what would we think of that situation? We'd think they guy is being borderline abusive, wouldn't we? While yes Marcela has every right to be justified in her anger, the problem lies with how she behaves or reacts due to her anger. Feelings are always valid, actions not so much. Actions can be explained but not always justified and this is where Marcela's behavior is wrong. Here she shows that she has the upper hand and control over Armando's fate in totality.
In this moment as Armando now starts yelling at her as Cata and the guest near them, Armando is the abuser and Marcela is the abused as she stands there taking his yelling they then get interrupted by Cata and the guest and great each other. Marcela then throws a jab at him to poke him, he turns to look at her and shakes his head and tells her that wasn't funny.
Marcela turns to look at him and says "No? You don't think that it was funny that you were locked in your office with a model and had your assistant sneak her out?"
This now becomes a public humiliation of Armando as his intimacy is thrown out there for the public to consume and Marcela is the poor victim of Armando and his infidelity.
[EDIT: I find this scene interesting because you'd assume Marcela wouldn't want to make it public that Armando cheats on her. She cares about public perception. However she throws this out to both Cata and unknown guest. A person who often suffers at the hand's of their partner due to infidelity carries a shame and an embarrassment due to it, so why does Marcela make it public? She does it to make Armando uncomfortable, to show that she has power in the relationship. Also because this is a a tactic many abusers use, which is victimize themselves to the public in order to gain sympathy votes and whenever the person who is the true victim of the situation acts out in defiance, anger, or even abusive/toxic ways, they can say "see I told you! They're the bad one, I'm just a victim!" this allows the abuser to continue having the upper hand in the relationship and further isolating their victim.
Which is something that Armando is dealing with. In another post I talked about how Armando never seemed to make many friends aside from Mario but it just hit me that often times Armando has said that he can't go somewhere or hang out with certain people because Marcela hates them and will not let him go out or use them as an excuse to go on his dates with Betty because Marcela would want to go to keep an eye on him. Often times Marcela is the one that is seen to be the one to have more friends than Armando.]
This isn't the first time that an incident like this happens.
Later on when Armando begins his romance with Betty in the early stages of it they get into a huge fight in his office due to a poem Betty left on his desk signed by Delmira Agostini(Post Hmm, Yeah, Who Knows Where He Spent The Night) and later on that night Hugo goes into his office and tells him about it.
Armando scoffed and said something along the lines of "Marcela went to you with the new piece of gossip, of course she would.". It wasn't until I heard him say that that it all made sense to me.
Armando doesn't just neglect to invite Marcela into his personal intimate life(his thoughts etc.) because he's a cheating whore but because he doesn't trust her.
We're never shown Marcela to be worthy of his trust(just because you're in a relationship with someone doesn't automatically mean you get ownership of their intimacy or that you deserve it for simply being a participating individual of said relationship) . Behind closed doors when he's not around she tells his business to Patricia, Hugo, or Margarita and from there on mouths run. She does it with every affair Armando has and I'm not saying she doesn't have a right to be upset, she does but the way she behaves and reacts to it is the problem.
She demands for Armando to respect her, prioritize her, do everything she wants and without doing anything to be worthy of it. Her possessiveness isn't only related to Armando, she's also possessive regarding her role in Eco Moda, which is a reason why she goes after Betty so much, even before she starts to cover for Armando's infidelities.
Marcela's abuse is by extorting Armando both emotionally and sexually. The man lives only to avoid fights in the relationship and uses affairs as a from of escapism from said relationship, is it justified? No.
This behavior of him feeds the cycle, however we understand that Armando's actions are wrong and not excusable, explainable? Yes but not excused. In the same vain, so are Marcela's actions.
In order for a relationship to be toxic, both people have to be abusive towards each other, if not than it would just be an abusive relationship but because both Marcela and Armando have these abusive tendencies and traits, they both lash out, they both inflict pain on each other and they both hate each others guts.
Due to Armando's gaslighting Marcela reacts fueled with anger to prove that she's right.
[EDIT: This other half(starting from this point on) of the post is written months after I first wrote the first half so there might be a bit of change in tonality when I talk about Marcela, however the point still stands which is why I didn't just write a whole new post in regards to this.]
I've just never understood why she wants to prove she's right and the only thing that comes to mind is ego.
Marce has proven that Armando has been unfaithful. She often says that if she ever caught Armando in the act of infidelity that she'd end him however we have been told countless times of the women Marcela has kicked out of Eco Moda and career's of whom she's ruined because she had enough evidence, just not of Armando with his pants down. This evidence has been enough for Marce to act this way...so wouldn't that be enough to prove that Armando is unfaithful? Enough evidence to end him and their relationship? Each time he denies this, each time he ends the argument with "fine I'll leave then." and she tells him not to.
I think Marcela's possessiveness comes from losing her parents and not being able to move through that pain. Losing a loved one is not easy and she lost both her parents and was told that to honor her parents she should marry Armando, that it's what her parents wanted most in the world, for both families to be united and to work for the company.
I do think for that reason Marcela also stayed in the relationship with Armando. She felt that she was honoring her parents final wishes, however, she truly thought or believed she loved Armando and was in love with him.
She didn't understand that what she felt for him wasn't real and genuine feelings.
After taking a break from YSBLF for a couple of weeks I've had to really reflect on my personal opinions of the characters, especially Marcela.
I don't think it's surprising for me to say that I'm not a big fan of hers, even when she's nice. I understand that Armando's actions are a reason as to why she acts the way she does, however while writing for Armando's Deep Dive Character post I came to realize something that made me look at Marcela in a whole new light.
I condemn Marcela so much, without an ounce of redemption, when she's just like Armando.
Not in all aspects, but in some, they are.
This is highlighted a lot when Armando becomes toxic in his relationship with Betty, after she finds the letter.
As I was writing down that part of his post I realized that Armando was acting just like Marcela was when she'd accuse him of cheating and it wasn't until I did that that I decided to take some time and reflect on Marcela and wanting to give her a fair chance instead of making a post only condemning her with only a few nice things to say about her.
Again, emotions, feelings, they are valid but actions aren't always justified, only explained.
In the art of being objective, I must also be objective with Betty and as much as I hate to do this I must run her through the mud for just this once.
Marcela isn't insecure, I think we've established that already. The reason why she stayed with Armando was more in the act of egotism and wanting to be the 'champion', above all women she'd be the one the tame the slut(I use this term without gender in mind). She stays in the relationship because of her possessiveness, like a dog who has marked her territory already, and in a sense to honor her parents, in this order, from priority to lesser.
However there's more to her behavior.
Marcela has been gaslit by Armando for a couple of months, I won't say years because at the start of the Novela it was insinuated that though they were in a relationship for two years that it was understood it was pretty casual from Armando's side since he did make a promise to stop being such a sexual-*ahmm* social butterfly outside of their relationship and to settle down and become more mature. So again I won't say years for the exact reason as even Marcela knew that Armando had his other girlfriends, even if he denied it, like everyone knew.
Obviously this would cause her to act out this way, however very immature on her part. Since with her we don't really get an upbringing, even a small hint like we did with Armando it is really hard to pin point if she was always like this or if it was solely based on Armando's cheating that made her be that way.
However, again, since she was this way from the get go, one can assume she has always been like this.
She's classist, entitled, snobby, elitist, sexist, and so much more from the start.
Due to that we will asume that this is probably due to feeling like she needs to be in a constant competition with women, for Armando. However this in itself present itself as a double edge sword of sorts, for one it causes her to have a big idea of herself. She views herself as better than most women if not all, physically that is. This grandiosity she has of herself is really the factor that causes such a strain in their relationship because let's say that Marcela wasn't so possessive, sexually and emotionally manipulative, and selfish in her relationship, do you think Armando would cheat on her?
And the argument of "why is it only the woman's fault that their partner cheats on them?" its not important rn, this question isn't implying that.
There's a possibility he would, lets be honest, he wasn't in love with Marcela.
But at least he'd love her as a friend, no?
Enough to not want to hurt her.
While yes Armando was marrying her for three reasons, one of them being his ego inflation once he won the presidency of Eco Moda instead of Daniel(though this wasn't the only reason he wanted the gig) the other his parents and lastly the fact he wanted to prove to Marcela, his parents, and himself that he was capable of being mature and settling down with one woman and he chose Marcela to be that woman.
He did want to stay faithful to her and he did want to get serious.
However, this is where the but gets here and Marcela's fanbase will get upset but too bad too sad, this is an objective analysis.
Marcela became so much more possessive of Armando after their engagement. She became very entitled of him and wanted to know where he was, with who, what(who) he was doing, and with whom. His agenda and her fight to have it, against Armando's wishes, was a perfect example of that but also went to symbolize to want lengths Marcela would go to get what she wants, without someone's consent.
With her ever growing entitlement of Armando the more desperate that man became to flee from Marcela to the point that it no longer was about proving to himself and others that he was mature and settling down with Marcela but out of duty, responsibility, and fear that he stayed in the relationship.
We can agree that Armando is just as much to blame for the dissolvement of that relationship as Marcela.
I do think that growing up in an environment where Beauty is the status quo and "perfection" isn't only expected but required has caused her to be very vain and superficial, just like with Armando. She was a daddy's girl and it was implied by Roberto that Marcela was probably her father's favorite.
I already did a post where I talked in granted detail about a father's role in their daughter's development and life[Don Hermes: A Deep Dive] and I suggest you go read it if you haven't in order to continue this next theme.
It's always healthy to grow up with both parents, especially a father figure. It helps a girl out a lot in her life. The problem begins when the father figure isn't a good parental role.
For example: A father who always succumbs to all the tantrums and wishes their daughter has will teach them that they should always get what they want without much effort, that things should be handed to them. It teaches girls that certain things are possessions, even humans, that they deserve things if they so as much just want it. It makes them grow up with a huge ego and belief that they deserve things for simply existing and breathing, even if their behavior isn't in par with it.
Allowing your child to avoid the natural consequences of their actions teaches them that they can do what ever they want.
If Marcela was a huge daddy's girl, but grew up with a father who did absolutely anything she wanted and desired for simply saying it she won't have a balanced way of thinking when it comes to her partner. She would expect him to give her everything she wants and desires for simply being in the relationship and when not met her way she'd throw a tantrum in order to still get it.
What evidence is there in show of this?
One of the very first episodes there's a scene where she's with Margarita, talking about the agenda, I believe, and Margi tells her she's not acting like a mature woman but the same spoiled immature woman as always. Marcela gets offended and angry at this but the scene changes.
The tiny glimpses we get from Marcela aren't positive ones. They indicate someone who always has been this way.
Even though I haven't really sat down to watch the later half of the novela, only the last three episodes, Marcela still carried and acted as herself. Not once did she change, especially those crucial episodes in which she breaks up with Armando.
When she has moments of lucidness, of realizing what that relationship is, Margi and Patsy Pats are always there to pull her away from that lucidness and convince her to stay in the relationship, especially Margi as she constantly manipulates Marcela's emotions to continue the relationship. HOWEVER, even when it comes to that lucidness, Marcela only wants to break up with Armando for the simple reason that it grosses her out that Armando slept with Betty. That's it. It only hurts her that she's suffered and she doesn't want to continue suffering.
Yes this is a valid reason, one should end a relationship if they are unhappy in said relationship. So what is the problem?
Selfishness, even in the breakup, Marcela shows to be selfish. She uses this infidelity that Armando had with a woman, an "ugly" one, and that is the most despicable thing to her, not that he had an affair with a woman, but an ugly one. That is the affair that shatters her self-esteem because she herself realized that it wasn't only physical but emotional. He didn't just have a sexual affair but he literally replaced her in all aspects of their life and treated her better than he treated her, the ugly woman.
That alone is hurtful. We can sympathize with her for it.
Obviously she'd want to break up with him.
However, again, the hurt she feels is a hurt of "What he has done to me" not rather a hurt of "What this relationship has done to the both of us". Time and time again Marcela fails to realize or accept that she too is to blame for their failing of that relationship.
She is a victim to Armando's gaslighting. She is a victim to the cheating.
However as explained in this post we can conclude why Marcela stays in the relationship. She doesn't stay for love, out of fear, out of the fear that no one will love her or want her. She stays out of possessiveness and egotism. She stays to have someone to control. Someone to abuse.
You cannot say Armando did not suffer abuse from Marcela.
She sexually exploited him by not respecting his no's when he'd say he didn't want to or wasn't in the mood. The man would just lay there. Even when it was over, the final times, when did get short scenes of them afterwards, while Marcela was happy, Armando looked somewhere else.
She guilt him to stay in the relationship, she'd talk badly about him to others. She had an absolute control over his social life. Her constant threats of destroying his life if they broke up if she ever physically caught him in the act of cheating weren't empty as she did just that when she had a whiff of cheating on his part.
Yes her feelings are valid, her actions? No.
Even then this woman was severely hurt, either if she herself inflicted these wounds or others did, she did deserve to get well for her sake and not for somebody else. However the huge differences between Marcela and Armando are big. They aren't tiny ones and due to this it could sound like I'm justifying or excusing one's actions while condemning another's actions; which is not the case at all.
And since I already said this post isn't focused on Armando; I won't really explain or try to breakdown his side and I'm merely using these two examples as a means to compare and see how vile Marcela's actions truly were.
The huge differences are that Armando wanted to end the relationship, not for his sake alone, but for Marcela's as well. He didn't want to cause her more harm and knew that by staying with her, even as guilty as he felt hurting her, that he was miserable and would only cause her harm due to it. He knew how his actions would harm her and in order to not harm her anymore he decided that it was best if they broke up. While Marcela only wanted to end the relationship because her ego had crumbled but even then she still didn't want to lose her hold on Armando as an object.
Armando came to not only know why his actions were bad, but understand why and how bad they were as he paid the consequences to it. He lost absolutely everything but in that he also learned what true love is and what self-love/respect means as well. Sadly Marcela never had that. She never really changed her way of thinking, even after Armando expressed to her how he felt in their relationship when they broke up for the final time, Marcela at the end of the novela said she loved Armando and due to that she was telling Betty the whole truth; however the real objective was that Eco Moda wouldn't be abandoned for the banks to shred to pieces, so it wasn't out of love or self-sacrifice for Armando's happiness. She only did it for Eco Moda, in reality she did it for her parents which shows that she can in fact love correctly when it's convenient to her. By that point she knew Armando would never get back with her, no matter how much she wanted it so she did what she had to for Eco Moda and her parents legacy.
The episodes after Betty finds the letter are so emotionally heavy for me that I cannot sit down and watch them just because it stresses me out so much for a lot of reasons, which is why I've taken a break from it.
For one: Marcela entitlement and egotism is so huge and highlighted in these episodes that I get head aches from rolling my eyes.
Two: Armando's behavior pisses me off so much.
and lastly three: Betty. Oh if I were her friend and knew what was going on I'd slap her 'til she orbited Jupiter thrice
Now that those disclaimers are out of the way let's continue analyzing the final stages of Marcela's abusive behavior.
In this love, or relationship triangle Armando is always in the middle of it. He is always split between Marce and Betty. However, what truly highlights his abusive and terrible toxic traits are very much a mirror and identical to those of Marcela.
For example, as mentioned above, when he grabs Betty by the force to kiss her in the office; Marcela constantly going down on him when he tells her he isn't in the mood. When he follows Betty around; Marcela spying on him. When he accuses Betty of cheating; Marcela's constant accusations. When he beat up Nicolas; Marcela destroying the career's of the women he had affairs with and banning them from ever working for Eco Moda.
Well Marcela only ever seemed to let go of an argument when Armando would conclude his gaslighting for the night by threatening to leave the apartment but she never really let go of it. She'd always save it for later; to prove he wasn't trust worthy. Often times when a person says they'll drop it or forgive the person or forget about it and they save it for later this is done in a way to guilt the person, to shame them, and humiliate them and make them feel, even if they've changed, that they will never atone for their past mistakes, that they are in debt to the person and therefore continue to do as they say or stay.
When Betty and Armando would argue or discuss something they'd often do it with the goal of resolving whatever issue it was they were having, which is something that is done in healthy relationships.
When Marcela and Armando are arguing there is constant yelling, no attempt to actually resolve the issue just end the argument because often Marcela wants to be right. She wants to be the one that is to speak and be heard and most importantly be right. This builds an atmosphere of fear, of distrust, and of guilt. Even if Armando did want to confess to her that he had cheated with so and so; it wasn't that Marcela would leave him; it's what she would do in retribution that kept him with his lips sealed.
Armando was terrified of Marcela and what she would do to him, not only in a romantic and personal way but to his entire life.
I'm not saying Marcela didn't have a right to be angry; except again, all of this time we're being told that Marcela loves Armando and her actions always come from a place of love. Does this sound like someone who loves their partner?
Since we've established the reason she stays isn't for love towards Armando we can conclude she stays for the love she feels for herself.
However this parallels to Betty as well.
When Betty comes to find the letter with every right she feels angry, hurt, violated, and hateful. However even then, as valid as her feelings are, her actions are not.
It wasn't until I read @el-moscorrofio-y-el-mercachifle post talking about Armando also being a victim that it finally clicked. For a while I felt like I couldn't really put my finger on it, like I couldn't understand why I disliked Betty so much at this point of the novela until THEN.
Betty takes on the role of Armando in her relationship with Armando, while Armando takes on the role of Marcela.
The papers are reversed. I'll talk more about this in the Armando post but just wanted to sort of bring it on here too because it displays Marcela's abusive behavior so well.
The thing is that Marcela's actions are often celebrated because she's a vengeful woman who was done wrong by the man she loves but we can conclude that Marcela doesn't love Armando, she isn't even in love with him or the idea of him. She's in love with the idea of herself being in love with him. She's in lust with him and she feels like he belongs to her for simply "winning against all the other women."
She uses a lot of tactics that Narcissistic abuser use. I'm not saying she displays symptoms of NPD. However she is very close to it.
Marcela Valencia has good qualities to her; for example deep down she's a romantic who when seeing Freddy and Aura Maria back together she softens and talked to Aura about being serious and not hurting Freddy. Seeing the way Freddy loves Aura Maria is what truly melts her ice heart and she ends up not firing them.
She helps out Patsy Pats even though she knows that she'll mostly likely never pay her back and that Patsy just manipulates her into giving her money and to leach her.
She wants to be loved. She's responsible, hard working, and truly cares about her role in Eco Moda.
These are good qualities of hers.
However they become overshadowed and covered up by all her other terrible qualities so it's really hard to find them and that's the whole point. While Betty is supposed to be "ugly" on the outside she's supposed to be quite beautiful and astonishing on the inside and contrary Marcela is supposed to be extremely attractive on the outside while ugly on the inside.
Yes, cheating is not something anyone deserves and it's not justified. If you're unhappy in a relationship be honest and leave it before you cheat. However both Armando and Marcela had so many responsibilities with other people for the relationship to continue and knowing how they both are they both stayed for those reasons but priorities are the main reason they stayed.
Armando was terrified of ending the relationship for the consequences and retaliation of Marcela. Marcela didn't want to end the relationship because she felt like she'd lose her favorite toy and she wouldn't feel like a champion anymore. Armando cheated to escape the relationship while this just ended up making Marcela even more unbearable. Had Armando never cheated on her after he proposed to her, do you think they would have ended?
Armando was miserable even at the start of that relationship and due to it he didn't trust nor share anything with her and that drove Marcela nuts and would continue to do so.
Healthy relationships, above all have mutual respect for one another and that moves their love to be selfless, their desires to work in harmony, and for issues to be resolved not because of egos but in order to restore the harmony of their relationship.
If we as a fandom condemn Armando for what he did to Betty and Marcela we should also condemn Marcela and Betty for what they did to Armando.
In this love triangle of sorts they were all victims of their borderline abusive and full on abusive traits. Also they're all victims of Margarita, in all honesty she should be the one that should be blamed, along with Roberto. They both sucked as(Step) parents, role models, and advisories.
Anyway hope y'all like this post. I know it's a little all over the place but I've been writing it for months and finally decided to post the first part.
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