cr: toothlessong

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@elhanoka
cr: toothlessong
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(me today at 11.17 am during my public transport commute thinking about "because we're friends""since when?" scene)
I love this scene and the multilayered dialogue in this series so much.
In my opinion, here's what's happened:
Tanrak saw the way Barth interacted with the outside world and Tanrak heard him saying that his God isn't as good as the one Tanrak believes in.
As Tanrak's attraction begins to grow, in a very natural process he starts to mirror Barth's sarcasm and idgf type of superficial behavior, while Barth starts to be more initiative and caring towards Tanrak. It's like they are slowly switching roles and what one considered his defense-mechanism-social-mask turns up in another as their true self. They're unconsciously disarming one another in the face of authenticity.
Tanrak's "since when?" can be interpreted as an accidental permission for courtship. It's also a reveal of Tanrak's true self – playful, lively, teasing and charming. It's an immediate destruction of a friendly boundary and consequently the last frontier that held Barth back – the tangible tension, the uncertainty mixed with unexplainable inner knowing, the inability to resist... which reminds me of the very next scene:
Why would you?
Barth isn't the mastermind. He's a teenage boy in love. He's almost practical in his approach because he knows if he's wrong about Tanrak the consequences are terrible (and the feelings too).
He doesn't really care for himself, but he cares for Tanrak or what it might mean for him to be called the f word because he saw it at the empty pool. There was no water because the attraction wasn't there yet, the emotion that water always represents – barren. The only feelings in that damned pool were judgment and shame. Barth saw what one little act of disobedience which wasn't even Tanrak's fault did to him (he was literally asking for forgiveness just now).
So Barth doesn't know whether Tanrak is ready to face something so much "worse" than that. To choose to sin in the act of obeying one's heart, not the institution nor God's will.
GOD SEES YOU ALWAYS
XLOV 'SERVE' 260605
movie night
laundry lounge
art is just iteration and reiteration and this one single paragraph changed my life
FAKE FACT LIPS + Text Posts
i no longer carry a heavy heart to places where i used to weep
paula (via youtube) // James Baldwin Tell Me How Long the Train's Been Gone // Marina Abramović & Ulay Rest Energy // F. Scott Fitzgerald The Sensible Thing // Michelle Peñaloza How to Not Forget // Nari (via instagram) // Resident Evil 3 (2020) cr. Capcom // C.G. Drews Don't Let the Forest In // unknown // Mary Oliver A Visitor // @/wriesofaromantica (via instagram) // John S. Boskovich Electric Fan (Feel It Motherfuckers): Only Unclaimed Item from the Stephen Earabino Estate //
Now you really can't be with anyone but me. No. I've long been like that. I can't live without you.
FAKE FACT LIPS (2026) | Episode 5
many such foolish cases of things left unsaid :)
A missing scene. Thanks for all the fanart and fic throughout the years, you guys
it starts, as it will end, with a garden🌳
I rebooted my over-a-decade-old tumblr just to share my GO drawings