Scythe of Heaven in Press: An Original Anthology, Volume 2, pg. 69
Rating: Teen | CW: violence, mild gore & body horror, character death - After an alien invasion, one broken man has the power to give the human race a fighting chance.
One Becomes Two (part 1 of Love on the High Seas)
Rating: Teen | CW: None - After a disillusioned merman saves a handsome ship captain, he becomes enamored with the brave captain’s beauty and brash confidence. Lucky for him, the feeling is mutual.
Two Become One (part 2 of Love on the High Seas)
Rating: Mature | CW: None - If life on a ship has taught Captain Liam Wallace anything, it's to take the good when it comes. And Arctus is a very good thing.
Drabbles/Flash Fic
"How Dare You"
Rating: Gen - A drabble about two people who have very different ideas about what love looks like.
"Righteous Fire"
Rating: Gen - A friends to enemies (to friends?) flash fic.
Prompt Fills
Hanahaki
Rating: Teen (CW: mild blood and gore) - Choosing to purge love from her system rather than die for a love unrequited.
Assassin Double Life
Rating: Gen - Two married men also work together as assassin and handler, but only one of them knows it. Shenanigans ensue.
__
Fan Fiction
I’ve got some fan fics as well. Here's a complete list of everything sorted by fandom.
Dragon Age
The Revelation of All Things
Relationships: Female Lavellan (mage Inquisitor) / Cullen Rutherford, many background relationships
Rating: E | Words: 608k
Give a Heart, Get a Throne
Relationship: Female Warden / Leliana
Rating: G | Words: 10.7k
Various and Sundry Revelations
Relationships: Varies by chapter
Rating: G | Words: 7.7k
A Shadow Dancing in the Flames
Relationship: Shadow Dragon Rook / Ashur | The Viper
Rating: T | Words: 1.8k (In Progress)
The Wayhaven Chronicles (In Between Series)
A series of stand-alone one-shots of moments not covered in the books featuring stoic, emotionally stunted detective Ophelia Maven who accidentally fell into a love triangle between Nate and Adam.
Relationships: Female Detective/Nate Sewell, Female Detective/Adam du Mortain (love triangle)
Aftermath - Rating: G | Words: 2.3k
Safety - Rating: T | Words: 2.2k
Research - Rating: T | Words: 3.3k
Choices - Rating: T | Words: 1.9k
Bruises - Rating: T | Words: 4.3k
K.I.S.S. - Rating: G | Words: 6.6k
Mass Effect: Andromeda (Across Galaxies Series)
Relationships: Female Ryder / Harry Carlyle
From Here to Mars - Rating: T | Words: 4.5k
Old Friends, New Beginnings - Rating: E | Words: 19.4k (In Progress)
Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💜
Thank you 🥹 I knew immediately what my first two fics were going to be, but I had to think for a minute on my list. I am done, and behold! My treasures!
The Light You Still Hold | 250k WIP
ship: Cullen x Female Mage Trevelyan
features: non-inquisitor herald, plus size herald, Hawke as Inquisitor, no love triangles, changes/adjustments to main quests, some political stress, happy ending guaranteed
brief summary: what if the prisoner was like "uhh no actually I don't want to die :)" and ran away during the prologue so she never becomes the herald or the inquisitor? Enter Ophelia Trevelyan who rejects the call so hard, she becomes an Inquisition prisoner for a time.
Truly no other fic has held my attention or devotion as long as this story. It was my first jump into actively participating in the fandom back when I started in 2020, my first time feeling absolutely crushed by the fandom, and also the reason I came back to the fandom in 2024. Ophelia resides so close to my heart and her unusual story has always been a pride & joy to me. Her story has always been about being worthy of love and respect regardless of what you bring others. I have been so pleased with jumping into this story and seeing how much she is loved not only by the people IN her story, but the people who are reading it. It's always been important to me that her journey is as much about self-love as it is about forgiveness and second chances and growing more into yourself.
Deeper than the Ocean Itself | 129k COMPLETE
ship: Cullen x Female Mage Trevelyan
features: post-trespasser, Cullen still on lyrium, mermaids/sirens, seers, character exploration & development, angst with a happy ending, so much angst and love, so much healing
brief summary: The Inquisition disbanded, but Cullen is still on lyrium and very rapidly approaching the ending where he dies. Enter a siren who opens his eyes to the people who care about him and forces him to accept that maybeee he should fight to live.
The scope creep on this story was SOOOO real. Inspired by the song No Longer You from Epic: the Musical. It was meant to be 20k, then 40k, and then I gave up counting because I knew this story needed to be told. I was taken with the idea of a Cullen who was accepting that dying to lyrium was his future, and how it would feel to be confronted with the idea that you aren't yourself anymore. It paralleled and echoed such a beautiful story in Ophelia who wasn't traumatized as he was, but whose life was equally empty. To me, the story is about healing, and how such requires your strength AND your willingness to reach out to others. It was very much a nod to how isolating it can be fighting through problems and how important it to balance individual strength and the strength of relying on others. Love and healing doesn't exist in a vacuum!
love has a quiet voice | 43k COMPLETE
ship: Cullen x Female Mage Trevelyan
features: post-trespasser, Satinalia/Christmas fic, family angst & fluff, snowed in together, strangers to lovers, happy ending guaranteed
brief summary: when you get snowed in with the Inquistion's grumpy commander and his family so you can solve HIS family angst and NOT your own. and fall in love, lots of that.
What if I had the worst Christmas ever and I went home feeling like garbage and spent the next week on my own because everyone was gone and it was just me and my thoughts and they were driving me mad? Enter the fic I wrote in two weeks. Negative jokes aside, this story was a blast to write and the words kept coming from it. My goal for this was rom com Christmas fic, but the angst of my own Christmas bled into it and we got this instead. I adored it though. It's one of my favorite iterations of Cullen & Ophelia because I loved seeing their growth together and their love story. It was my first time writing exclusively from her POV vs a mix of both so I loved getting to see him blossom into a real person for her overtime. It was just so... I just love it a lot. I want to see more of them. I can't wait to write more in this verse.
Let the Lonely In | 11k COMPLETE
ship: Alistair x Female Mage Amell
features: post-DAI, non-warden Amell, warden!Alistair, shy main character, crazy side characters, family!!!, loveeee
brief summary: a fairytale-esque love story of Laia Amell finding a home in Vigil's Keep AND the grey warden who escorted her all the way there.
part of a trade I did with @inquisiorastoria! She let me borrow her Amell and picked an idea, and then the words for it kept coming. So much romantic fluff, so much cuteness, so much watching two silly people realize they are worthy of love. It was my first time doing a trade with someone and writing for someone else AND writing Alistair. It was a lot of firsts! I enjoyed practicing with shorter, significant scenes that built over time vs the slower build of a long fic. A joy to write. 10/10 will come back to them again.
Spooky Hotel Story | 20k COMPLETE
ship: Killian Jones x Emma Swan
features: only one hotel room, romance, some horror & monsters, neither of them are monsters
brief summary: Emma Swan's car breaks down and she has to stay in a hotel. And said hotel only has ONE room which means staying with the infuriating Killian Jones her only option. And now there's a monster hunting them down which means NO time for romance (except there is).
enter a fic written from 2016 which is why it's finally something NOT from Dragon Age! Looking at the writing for this makes me cringe internally, but I was so taken with this silly monster hunters idea and it's one of the few fanfiction I think about pretty often. It spawned several unposted sequels with the same silly premise (spooky forest story, spooky cruise story), and all of them inspired by semi-real experiences of being in creepy, PROBABLY haunted places. It was probably the first fic I wrote that was longer than an oneshot and completed. Much love, and a reminder of how far I've come as a writer. I could do this SO much better now. Dragon Age Cullen/Ophelia haunted hotel story, when???
Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💜
(for you, I will also take any original stuff you wanna scream about, tooooo)
Hiii! Thank you, m'dear! Five favorite? Hmm...
Two Become One - Original fic, M/M original character, Rated M, 8k words, complete
This is probably my favorite right now because I just posted it 😆. It's a continuation of One Becomes Two, where a gruff merman and sunshine ship captain learn how to live (and love) together despite their differences.
Truths Half Told Beget Lives Half Lived - Dragon Age fic, Knight Captain Rylen/Original Female Character, Rated E, 250k words, complete
This fic about Rylen finding love in the Western Approach (and learning how to shake his lyrium addiction) is close to my heart. It took nine years to finish, and though I'd write the beginning differently now, it still holds up on rereads.
The Revelation of All Things - Dragon Age fic, Cullen/Female Lavellan, Rated E, 608k words, complete
What can I say? This is a beast of a DAI retelling with somewhere around fifteen(?) POV characters. But it was my first fic ever, and I'll forever be grateful for the friends I made in the DA fandom due to the years I spent this fic.
Old Friends, New Beginnings - Mass Effect: Andromeda fic, F!Ryder/Dr. Harry Carlyle, Rated E, 19k words, WIP
Despite never technically finishing this fic, I really love this story. I loved writing Nivan and Harry falling in love and getting together (even if I never quite got around to writing the conflict part I had in mind), and I think it had a nice end point, regardless.
Scythe of Heaven (pg. 69 of the PDF) - Original Fic, Rated M, 7k words, complete (please note content warnings before reading!)
This story is a departure from my ship fics. It's about a man who has infiltrated the compound of the aliens who have taken over Earth and massacred humanity in order to give the remaining humans a chance to survive. I'm really proud of how this one turned out.
An original short story of love on the high seas - a direct sequel to One Becomes Two!
Relationship: Original M/M
Rating: Mature
Summary: If life on a ship has taught Captain Liam Wallace anything, it's to take the good when it comes. And Arctus is a very good thing, offering Liam a chance at the kind of love and devotion he never thought he'd have.
As they take their first tentative steps into romance, Liam and Arctus must come to terms with their vastly different needs as human and mer. Their first port of call provides a simple solution... and an opportunity to share their mutual love of the sea away from prying eyes.
--
Captain Liam Wallace tries not to hyperventilate and burst into vaguely hysterical laughter as he rows himself, his first mate Silas Grey, and a man he’s fairly sure is a merman across the Thames to his ship, The Queen of the Sea. He’s spent every night since his near drowning wondering if he’s gone barmy.
Had a merman truly saved him after he'd fallen of his ship during their most recent clash with pirates? Had he truly woken from his unconscious state in the middle of the ocean to the sensation of strong hands pushing him out of the water?
It seems too fantastical to believe.
And yet there sits his savior looking cool as spring morning, sporting two legs instead of a tail.
As he rows, the docks recede into a wider view of London proper. The site of their unexpected meeting disappears behind a passing ship, but the memory of their shocking meeting—and an unexpected request from a merman to sail the seas with him—lingers amid the usual relief of leaving dry land behind.
He wants to pinch himself. Or maybe dance a jig.
He might very well throw up instead.
Silas, who usually does the rowing, is giving him a shrewd look. Liam ignores him. They’ll talk later. Or rather, Silas will demand information later. It's the way of things.
Liam isn’t sure what he can say, though. That a creature of the sea saved him from certain death and then visited his window every night as they sailed to London? That he fancies himself in love with a person whose face he’s only glimpsed once in low light?
Until now, that is.
And a right beauty he is, all pale skin with strong yet somehow delicate features. A shiver dances down Liam’s spine, all the anxiety and anticipation of the unknown melding into a restless ache in his limbs. Even now, he's not quite sure how he recognized the man when he appeared before Liam—fully human—on the dock. The shock of recognition was undeniable, though. It reverberated through him still.
He rows a bit harder. The push and pull of his muscles and the burn of exertion distract him for approximately thirty seconds.
Perhaps he’s gone off the deep end after all. Perhaps the tall blond man dressed in the latest fashions with piercing brown eyes and a ghostly beauty isn’t actually sitting across from him. Perhaps he’s merely made up a man from the fuzzy memory of a pale face staring up at him from the murky waters of the English Channel.
That theory flies overboard—along with his thin veneer of calm—when Silas turns and addresses the man seated beside him. “So, how long will you be joining us, Mr. Reynolds?”
Mr. Arctus Reynolds doesn’t take his eyes off Liam as he answers, “Until the captain tires of my presence, I suppose.”
Silas blinks and glances at Liam with wide eyes. Liam clears his throat.
“You needn’t worry, Grey. I’ll take care of Mr. Reynolds while he’s aboard.”
As Liam expects, Grey’s shoulders take on an unfortunate stiffness at this news. As captain, Liam has always been careful to ride the line between distant superior and caring benefactor with his crew. That includes Grey. But all the distance in the world hadn’t stopped the growing admiration in Grey’s eyes, nor the single, gently rebuffed offer on a night years ago when they were particularly deep in their cups.
He kept Grey on as his first mate because he trusted Grey’s assurances that it would never happen again. He also never anticipated bringing someone aboard who might fill that role for him: A few trusted brothels in a few oft-visited ports have always been enough for him.
And in truth, he still doesn’t know what this is. It’s not as if he and his merman ever talked about the future during their brief nighttime conversations. Instead, they traded stories of the past, the sounds of the ocean serving as the backdrop for a deep voice telling him about lonely life and lost family.
Arctus—and it is Arctus not least because that’s how Grey introduced him on the docks—says nothing in response to Liam’s declaration, but his eyes stay fixed on Liam as the silence settles around them. Grey looks off to the side, face drawn taut, and Liam does his best to fight back the blush that tries to rise up his neck and flood his cheeks every time he locks eyes with Arctus.
He blows out a breath of relief as they row into the shadow of the ship. The crew lowers the rope ladder and welcomes Liam and Grey aboard while staring curiously at their new addition.
Liam makes introductions to the necessary crew: second mate Ezra York, a short but stocky man in his mid thirties who, like Grey, served under Liam during their time in the British Navy and can tie knots better than anyone aboard; third mate Rosetta Turino, a tall, dark-haired woman with eyes like an eagle who he collected from the wreckage of a pirate ship off the coast of Sicily five years prior; and the ship’s medic Dr. Gretchen Bryant, a petite woman with strong-yet-gentle hands who had saved every life on the ship at least once since she’d come aboard two years ago.
“A far better doctor than a ship like this should merit,” Liam says in wry tone as he ends the introductions.
“Alas,” Dr. Bryant responds with a wry smile, “you're the only man to think so.”
“I think so, too,” York says quietly.
Turino gives York a soft jab the ribs.“You would.”
“And what about you?” Dr. Bryant asks as she turns to Arctus.
Arctus blinks. “I have no experience with anyone of your profession.”
Liam manages to hold back a wince at Dr. Bryant's flummoxed expression. “Oh. Well. That's good… I think.”
Arctus clears his throat, his gaze flicking to Liam before he tacks on in a less confident tone, “I may have no frame of reference for your skill, but Li—Captain Wallace doesn’t seem the type to suffer fools nor the incompetent.”
“Indeed, he does not,” Dr. Bryant agrees, her expression still wary but quickly warming.
“Then I have no reason to doubt you or your competency.”
Arctus reaches out to her—not with his palm up to receive and bow over her hand but rather with his palm to the side in a request for a handshake. Once again stunned, Dr. Bryant reaches out to shake his hand before a slow smile spreads over her freckled face. She shoots a side-long glance at Liam before releasing Arctus’ hand and giving an impertinent curtsy.
“I have a feeling I’m going to enjoy having you aboard, Mr. Reynolds.”
Liam sighs, half in exasperation and half in relief. “Alright. You’ve had your fun. Time to get moving. I want to be out on open water before sunset.”
The good doctor winks at Liam and retreats into her office built into the bow of the ship while the rest of the crew pulls anchor to let the current take them down the Thames. Liam nods to Grey, who gives him a stiff nod in return before flicking his eyes to Arctus and back to Liam. Tension shimmers between them like air on a hot day.
“You have the helm, Grey,” Liam says in a neutral tone.
“Aye, sir,” Grey responds, and with a shake of his head, he heads up the stairs.
The restless ache in Liam’s limbs grows sharper when he looks over to find Arctus watching him. There’s a wariness there that wasn’t present when he approached Liam on the docks, but the intensity of his gaze is the same.
Another shiver snakes down his spine, and he swallows around a suddenly dry mouth.
“If you’ll follow me, Mr. Reynolds.”
Before Arctus can reach for it, Liam grabs his small trunk and heads toward the door between the stairs, which leads to a front room filled with a bolted-down table and chairs that serves as both the officer dining and a meeting room. He maneuvers around the table to the door on the far wall that opens into his personal quarters. The room is filled to the brim with his amateur drawings and paintings that Arctus claimed to admire during their talks, along with a wide variety of knick-knacks all glued or bolted down to the bookshelves and walls around the room. He sets the trunk down, his heart racing—not from the exertion but from the very idea of Arctus being inside this room.
He dreamed of it, of course, though never in quite this context.
He turns and waves a hand around the space. “This is the best room we’ve got on the ship. I hope it will do for you.”
Arctus has approached one of the paintings, seemingly to admire it, but at Liam's words, an adorable divot forms between his pale brows. Liam wants to wipe it away with his fingers.
Or maybe his lips.
He inhales a quiet-but-unsteady breath at the sudden, vivid thought. He still isn't quite sure if any of this is real or, if it is real, what Arctus wants from the arrangement. He’d do well to remember that.
“This is your room,” Arctus says as he glances around the room, his tone flat.
Liam nods before pointing to a door against the far wall. “There’s a small bed in there I can use.”
Arctus walks over and opens the door. The space inside is barely more than a closet with a narrow bunk. It’s meant for a servant boy, but Liam has never had much use for such things. He can dress himself just fine, and he's certainly not interested in the other ways captains might "use" their boys. He doesn’t relish the thought of sleeping curled up on the short bunk, but at least he knows the mattress is in decent shape—he renovated every corner of the ship when he bought it.
The door snaps closed. “That won’t be necessary,” Arctus says.
The furrow in his brow is gone when he turns around. He doesn’t look at Liam as he crosses to the large bed in the middle of the room, nor does he hesitate to set a knee on the mattress, lean over the deep sill, and look out the open windows. The flush of heat that pulses in Liam’s chest at the sight of Arctus in his bed is quickly subsumed by the realization of what the man is thinking.
“Wait… you… you can’t just sleep in the ocean every night!” Liam splutters.
Arctus turns back, genuine confusion twisting his fine features. “Why not?”
“Because… people will come looking for me, and you won’t be in the room. Where should I tell them you’ve gone? If you weren’t so tall, we could say you were in the small bunk, but as it is, no one would believe you’d fit in that room.”
Arctus blinks and looks down at himself before turning to sit heavily on the sill. Liam has to remind himself not to be worried about him falling backward.
It’s not as if a merman can drown.
A merman. In his room. The longer this goes on, the more Liam is inclined to believe he's not gone mad after all.
Which means Arctus can leave any time he likes, even while they’re at sea. And might just do that, in fact, if Liam doesn't give him a reason to stay. Liam’s heart pinches at the thought. He dares to approach and sit beside Arctus on the bed, his hip brushing against Arctus' knee in the process.
Like a predator sighting prey, Arctus’ gaze snaps toward the contact. Liam starts to move away, but long fingers curl around his wrist before he can stand. The touch is warm and reassuring despite the way their hesitance permeates the air like a storm hovering on the horizon.
“I don’t mind,” Arctus says in a gruff tone. “The touch, I mean. It's simply… new.”
Liam resettles with a smile of understanding. Arctus takes a deep breath and looks Liam in the eye.
“I want to be here. With you. But I cannot… I can’t stay on the ship all the time. I need…”
He trails off and looks out the window. They’re still traveling down the Thames, and London is visible against the backdrop of a gray sky. Beyond the strip of habitation, though, green hills rolls off into the distance, and a fresh breeze blows in the scent of the countryside. It's almost enough to make him regret leaving solid ground.
Almost.
But as ever, the sea calls. The sensation must be far stronger for Arctus than it is for him.
“I’m not trying to keep you prisoner,” Liam says softly. “I’m trying to keep your secret safe from prying eyes and ears. We can figure things out as we go, aye?”
The tension slips from Arctus’ shoulders. He looks at Liam with a sudden, naked fondness in his expression that sets Liam’s body aflame. The flames grow higher when he slides off the sill and lands on the mattress next to Liam.
“Yes.”
“As long as the weather is fair, we’ll arrive at Gibraltar within a few weeks. I'll get a rope ladder and attach it to the sill so you can climb up and down in human form.” Liam huffs a laugh and shakes his head. “I had a hell of a time explaining those claw marks to the shipwright. At least it was proof I wasn’t hallucinating those nightly visits.”
He reaches out to give Arctus’s knee a gentle squeeze and is rewarded by a half smile and the warmth of a Arctus’ hand hesitantly covering his own. The sounds of the city have given way to the gentle hum of ship activity and the sloshing of water against the hull. They stare at one another for a long moment before Arctus’ expression sobers.
“I admit… a part of me expected you to laugh in my face when I showed up on that dock and asked to join you.”
“Never,” Liam breathes. “I’m so glad to see you, even if it still feels like I’m dreaming.”
“Then…”
Arctus trails off, seemingly at a loss for words. The divot returns, and without thinking, Liam reaches up to smooth over the crease with his thumb. Arctus goes still. His expression is fierce and yet somehow also incredibly soft as they lock gazes. Liam swallows and drops his hand.
“I would never try to keep you prisoner on this ship, Arctus, though I do want you to stay.” Liam licks his lips and takes a deep breath. Now or never. “But I feel like I should tell you that I find you attractive in the same way most men find women attractive. If that bothers you—”
“It doesn’t,” Arctus interrupts. His gaze scours over Liam’s face as if searching for a lie. Finally, he licks his lips and acknowledges, “That’s… that’s how I feel, too.”
Liam’s whole body breaks into goosebumps. He leans closer, the allure of pale lips and dark eyes pulling him like a lode stone. “Truly?”
A lovely blush spreads over Arctus’ cheeks, but he doesn’t hesitate to lean forward. Their lips brush, and Liam’s heart tries to beat out of his chest.
Arctus pulls back with an unsteady breath. “I’ve never done that before.”
Liam blinks out of his haze. “What… Never?”
With the shake of Arctus’ head, Liam rearranges his expectations. A thrill shoots through him at the idea of courting the man who kisses so chastely, no doubt merely replicating the affectionate but chaste kisses he witnessed between his brother and sister-in-law.
Not that Liam thinks a person who's grown up in the wild ocean doesn't understand how sex works, but sex for reproduction and sex for pleasure are two very different things. He reaches up to cup Arctus’ pink cheek.
“It was lovely. I’d like to share more, if you’re willing.”
Arctus leans into his palm and nods. Liam smiles and gives him another short, chaste kiss.
“We should certainly practice more of that later. For now, though, let me show you my ship.”
“There you go!” Liam shouts up at Arctus. “Just like that!”
If Liam hadn’t already fallen for Arctus’ luminous face and growling voice in the darkness, he would certainly be enamored with him now. Liam has been showing Arctus the literal ropes of being a sailor for the past few hours, and the confident way Arctus climbs the rigging, his massive, muscled body moving as gracefully as a dancer, sends shivers down Liam’s spine. Of course, there’s also the way his blond hair shines in the sunlight. And the way his muscles flex and tighten under his shirt. The mere act of watching his long fingers untangle rope like he’s handling delicate silks instead of rough hemp makes Liam hot under the collar.
As Arctus leans into the rigging, muscles taut and keen eyes scanning the waters, Liam feels like he’s fifteen all over again.
He’s had lovers before, of course. But for a long time, the specter of his mother’s disappointed stare, God rest her soul, weighed him down as surely as the cross around his neck. Sending him to the navy full of young, virile men at the ripe age of thirteen didn’t do him any favors. Hail Marys and whispered confessions in various ports around England never eased the urges, and he’d had more sex by the age of twenty than was probably healthy, often with older, more experienced men.
Of course, he also learned the dangers of a life lived in the shadows and adjusted accordingly.
Now, after retiring as a decorated British naval captain at the age of two and thirty, he’s spent the past three years working his way toward self acceptance. No one is allowed on board his ship who might take issue with his—and many of his crew’s—proclivities. He also employs women, though not nearly as many as he’d like. But Dr. Bryant and her assistant Beth, his third mate Rosetta, his navigator Almira, and their cook Hazel, as well as her entire staff, are women. A few deck hands might have been born as something different than what they now present to the world, too, but he doesn’t go about making it his business. As long as the work gets done, he's happy to address them however they like.
He doesn’t let any of his rich clients see his crew, though. He hates that it has to be that way, but after twenty years of loving men, he’s no stranger to their flaws. He has a few himself, in fact, and one of them flares to life even as he’s trying to take a page from his own book and let his gaze skip over Arctus’ more alluring features.
He reminds himself of his plans to woo his stoic-but-innocent merman, and tells his body to cool it.
Easier said than done, especially when Arctus calls out to him with that deep, penetrating voice.
“Captain Wallace, there’s a ship in the distance!”
Liam frowns. His lookout hasn’t alerted them of any ships. He climbs up the rigging to hang beside Arctus, shielding his eyes with his hand to look in the direction Arctus is pointing.
The horizon is empty.
“Erm…”
He reaches into his pocket for his spy glass, pulling it out and scanning the horizon again. A tiny ship appears in his glass, so small he still can’t make out their colors, though they don’t look black. He pulls the spyglass from his eye and glances at Arctus.
He’s almost too beautiful to look at up close, practically sparkling in the sunlight. His profile enhances the elegant slope of his nose and curve of his brow, the jut of his chin and fullness of his lips.
Liam swallows and raises the glass again.
“Looks to be another merchant vessel, but Rogers will keep at eye on it.” He clears his throat. “You, uh… you must have some spectacular vision to see something so far away.”
Arctus turns to look at him. Blinks.
And then he smiles, so radiant he outshines the sun.
“Better than yours, it seems.”
“Aye, and better than my lookout. Be careful or I’ll stick you in the Crow’s Nest.”
“Anything to be useful, Captain.”
Arctus’ tone is low and almost flirty. Liam tries not to melt into a puddle on the spot.
After having dinner with his officers—made only slightly awkward by Grey's suspicious glances at Arctus—Liam is practically vibrating. As they pass through the door to his quarters, a warm breeze wafts through the windows, the final dregs of sunset giving way to a wash of moonlight painting the window sill in silvered light. Liam closes and locks the door while Arctus strides toward the window, fingers nimbly working at his cravat and buttons. The clothes are dropped carelessly to the floor until only his undershirt remains. Then that too is stripped away as Arctus climbs on the bed and thrusts himself halfway out the window.
Liam bites his lip against the sensation of all the air being punched out of his lungs. The moonlight caresses Arctus' pale skin like a lover, and Liam is suddenly glad he hasn't lit the lamps, yet.
"I will wish to swim at some point before we reach Spain," Arctus says in a tone softer than Liam expected. "But this is enough for now. May we leave the windows open?"
"Of course," Liam says as he forces his body to move, fingers trembling slightly as he removes his own layers. "I secured the netting earlier to keep the birds out, so we'll only need to close them if it rains."
He pauses when he gets to his undershirt, hesitant in his nakedness in a way Arctus is clearly not. What must it be like to be so free with himself? No clothes to worry about. No need to toe the line of propriety to satisfy the sensibilities of judgmental people.
Arctus seems to notice his hesitance and looks over his shoulder. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Liam breathes. "I'm just. Very attracted to you."
"Ah," Arctus says, as if this explains everything. "Do you wish to have intercourse?"
Liam chokes while Arctus slides off the sill to the bed and tests the mattress before nodding with approval.
"I prefer the relative weightlessness afforded by water, of course, but this is nice."
"Feathers," Liam wheezes.
"Hmm?"
"It's got, uh, feathers in it."
"From birds?"
Arctus' disgusted tone breaks Liam out of his shock. He laughs and approaches the bed, choosing to leave his undershirt in place.
"I promise the feathers were cleaned. And I have them cleaned anew every time I come back to London, which isn't cheap. So this bed is as fresh and clean as it can be."
Arctus hums as if in doubt, but when he lies back on the bed, he smiles. "I suppose I can endure it."
Liam laughs again and stretches out next to Arctus. The moon is still bright, and the night is quiet but for the gentle rush of water around the boat. The sound lulls him as it always does. He never feels quite right on land. Only the gentle rocking of the sea can soothe him this way.
It stands to reason he'd fall for someone who calls the sea his home as well.
He turns in the bed to face Arctus. Arctus mimics the movement, his fair hair glowing as white as his skin. With a trembling hand, Liam reaches out and runs gentle fingertips over Arctus' cheek.
Arctus closes his eyes as if to savor the sensation. "You never answered my question," he whispers.
"Ah. That. I do, of course, but I also want to get to know you better. And take my time with you. There's no rush, is there?"
"Just my own impatience," Arctus admits with a lopsided smile.
Unable to resist, Liam props himself up on an elbow and leans over to kiss Arctus. Although his blood heats, urging him to go faster, he keeps his movements slow, fingers stroking over Arctus' pale cheek before curving around his jaw to tilt his head. After nothing more than a few presses of Liam's lips, Arctus' breathing becomes labored. He reaches for Liam but pauses before touching, as if afraid. Liam scoots closer.
"You can touch me," he says through his own elevated breathing before leaning down to nip at Arctus' full bottom lip.
Still, Arctus' hands are tentative, his movements light and trembling against Liam's waist. Liam pulls back and presses a kiss to Arctus' cheek, his nose, the space between his brows.
"I don't know how to do this," Arctus says, an edge of frustration to his tone.
"That's why we're going slow. Learning together. Everyone likes to be kissed and touched differently, so being with a new person is always an adventure, no matter how many times you've done it before."
"How many times have you done it?"
"More times than I can count," Liam half jokes.
He doesn't realize it's the wrong thing to say until Arctus slips from his grasp, the hand once cupping his cheek now left hovering in empty air. Arctus moves like water, graceful as he rolls away to sit up and put his feet on the floor. His broad back bows as he rests his elbows on his knees and rubs his hands over his face.
"What am I doing?" Arctus mutters into his hands. "I don't belong here. I don't—"
"Hey… Hey now, that's not true," Liam assures him even as fear pierces his heart. It would be quite the accomplishment, even for someone as unmoored and romantically clumsy as him, to lose Arctus after less than a day together. "I admit I have been with more people than perhaps is usual, but I promise you I'm not with anyone else now, nor do I have a desire to be anywhere but here. With you."
"Why?"
Perhaps Arctus is expecting it to be a difficult question, but for Liam, it's the easiest thing in the world.
"Because I feel alive when I'm near you. All my life I've loved the sea but considered her a fickle mistress. Balmy days with brisk winds followed by stormy nights and waves taller than the Queen. Then I met you and… it felt like the sea was offering me a gift. A person who shares my love of the sea and who knows what it feels like to lose their family. A person who understands my sense of humor and makes me laugh in return." He pauses and then shrugs as he adds, "And because you're beautiful, of course."
Arctus exhales a laugh as Liam intended. In a single, smooth movement, he returns to his previous position on the bed, facing Liam.
"I'm sorry," he murmurs, his hand stretching across the small gap between them.
Liam takes his hand and presses a light kiss to his knuckles. "Nothing to be sorry for. If you like, you can get off the ship in Gibraltar and simply follow along with us in the water. I'll get the ladder so you can come and go from my room as you please."
"If I do that, I won't be able to show myself to the crew."
"That's true."
Arctus shakes his head. "I'll stay."
"I'm glad," Liam says as he smiles and lets his eyes drift shut, content to hold Arctus' hand all night if he needs it.
They wake as the first glow of dawn lightens the darkness. This time, it's Arctus who kisses him first, closed-lipped but soft—a new and gentle way to greet the day that Liam could gladly get used to. They lie together, Arctus reaching for him with more confidence, hands smoothing over his waist as they kiss. Liam returns the touches as gently as he can, ignoring the demands of his body and skimming a hand up Arctus' arm to wrap around the nape of his neck.
As sunlight streaks through the open windows, they reluctantly disentangle themselves to get ready for the day. Liam claims the title of captain, but in truth, he does any job around the ship that needs doing. And even on a well-maintained ship like his, there's always something to do.
They talk in low tones, laughing and trading chaste kisses as they pass one another. It's a new experience for Liam, having never been in a situation where he could be easy with a lover, let alone have said lover on his ship and in his space. He's amazed that it feels so natural.
It must be the same for Arctus. He's at ease this morning, teasing Liam about his need to shave, revealing that mermen don't grow facial hair, even in their human forms.
"I'm at once jealous and also saddened by this news," Liam admits.
"Why saddened?"
"Because I'll never have the pleasure of seeing you with a beard. I think you'd make a fetching seaman with a long blond beard."
Arctus throws a towel at his head and laughs. It's a relief after the strong emotions of the night before, and Liam's chest expands with joy until he feels like he's floating over the floorboards.
It's not until he tries to open his door that he remembers he locked it the night before. When he opens the door, he stops short at the sight of Grey waiting for him in the meeting room. His face is turned to the side, expression tight with… sadness? Anger? Disapproval? Liam can't quite tell.
"Good morning, Captain. The weather is fine and the winds are strong. We're ahead of schedule already."
"Good to hear."
Liam approaches Grey as Arctus moves past them to go out on deck. He looks back before stepping out the door, and Liam nods at him. As soon as the door clicks shut, Grey clears his throat.
"Captain… Liam. Who is that? And why… why do I know nothing about him?"
Liam bites back an uncharitable impulse to ask why Grey would think he knows everyone Liam knows. He and Grey met more than a decade ago—long before Grey developed feelings Liam couldn't reciprocate—and Liam considers him a friend. Although they've never spent much time together on shore leave, Liam supposes he owes Grey an explanation, even if he can't tell him the absolute truth.
"He's a friend," Liam hedges, "and I asked him to come with me. I understand it might be awkward for a time—"
"Is he your lover, then?"
Grey's voice is tight, his brows furrowed and mouth turned down. Liam wants to be angry at the impertinent question. Instead, he merely sighs.
"Not that it's your business, Grey… but yes. And I would have told you it might happen, but I swear upon my mother's grave that I never thought he would agree to my request. You saw how surprised I was on the docks."
Grey's face untwists into something less thunderous, though no less sad. He looks down for a moment before nodding.
"I did see that. I thought you looked uncomfortable."
"Not uncomfortable. Just… I wasn't prepared. And that meant I couldn't prepare you, either. For that, I'm sorry, Silas."
Grey nods again. "So… You're happy?"
Liam can't bite back the smile in time. "I am."
Liam runs a hand over his mouth to wipe away the smile as Grey's expression shifts again, a flash of a melancholic smile appearing before falling away. The ship rocks gently under their feet, almost as if the sea is trying to soothe them both. The conversation was necessary, but Liam still hates that Grey is unhappy. He tells himself it's for the best—that Grey can move on now that any possibility of a relationship between them is at an end.
It doesn't help.
Liam lays a hand on Grey's shoulder. "Come, let's have a bit of breakfast and plan out our client visits. I want to be sure we are thorough."
A small smile returns, Grey's eyes sparking with interest. "I have some ideas about that."
"I knew you would," Liam assures him as they step out into the light of a new day.
It's early morning, but the shoreline around southern Spain is already shimmering with summer heat as they sail toward their berth. Arctus leans over the railing of the ship, eyes scanning the brilliant blue waters with interest, looking very much as if he'd like to jump overboard.
"I've never been here before," he says.
"To the Mediterranean Sea?"
Arctus nods but keeps his gaze glued to the water. Liam rests his cheek in his palm and watches Arctus. The days have been mild and the winds favorable, so they've reached their first port of call a full two days ahead of schedule. For the first time in many years, Liam is itching to go ashore—not because of the many meetings with his Gibraltar clients he'll need to attend, but because he's planning to sneak away with his merman to finally see him in his full glory.
Arctus is even more eager, his inability to swim wearing on him the longer he's forced to remain in his human form. Liam determines that their first order of business will be acquiring the ladder.
By the time they dock in the harbor, the sun has reached its zenith. Liam shouts a few final orders, but his crew waves him off.
"Go on with you!" Rosetta shouts at him from the rigging as she shoots him a pointed wink. "We know you've got better things to do than stay here with us."
He turns away before the heat rushed up his neck can reach his cheeks. As soon as the gang plank is in place, he picks up his pack and gently skims a hand over Arctus' back, wordlessly inviting him to follow.
Even the brisk breeze coming off the ocean can't fight the stink of fish guts and unwashed humanity that heralds a port city such as this one. He grimaces as he heads deeper into the pungent air toward the warehouse district—the best place to find what he's looking for. It takes a few tries and a bit of haggling, but at last he finds a sturdy rope ladder of the proper length, as well as bolts to hold it in place. He pays the merchant to wrap it up and deliver it to the Queen.
"Now you'll be able to come and go as you please."
"Not during the day, though," Arctus says in that monotone that Liam has learned means he's trying not to sound ungrateful.
"Perhaps not every day, but a habit of afternoon naps can be developed at any time of life, I hear."
Arctus' expression brightens. As he glances out over the busy harbor, though, his expression falls again.
"There are too many people here. I won't be able to go out until we leave."
"I thought of that already," Liam says with a grin. "Come with me."
It takes the better part of the early afternoon to hike around the base of the rock of Gibraltar, but it's worth it to see Arctus' face light up when they round the far side and come upon a view of the ocean unfettered by docks, houses, or human industry.
On this side, the rock plummets straight into the sea with a small beach off to the side. The drop-off into deep water is quick and severe, but what does that matter to a merman? A few ships can be seen in the distance, but even with a sight glass, they'd never be able to see Arctus.
"Go on, then," Liam encourages. "I'll keep watch."
Arctus hesitates. "I… I want you to come, too."
Liam bites his lip. It's more dangerous that way. Arctus will need to stay near the surface, and Liam will likely be too distracted by swimming with a merman to properly keep watch.
Still, it's tempting.
And when Arctus reaches out and takes his hand, a wide smile breaking over his normally severe expression as he pulls Liam gently toward the water, he simply can't resist.
The air is warm as it touches newly bared skin. The sun beats down on his naked chest and back, though it isn't hot enough to burn this time of year. His gaze glides toward Arctus, unashamed as he trails greedy eyes over pale skin revealed to the sunlight. A sharp jolt of desire lances through him—Arctus is gloriously built, all sinew and muscle packed on muscle.
A shocking burst of riotous laughter explodes from Arctus' lips as he rushes into the water, and Liam can't help laughing along with him. The transformation is less than a ripple—Liam blinks and there's a tail flashing in the ocean spray. Arctus dives deep, and Liam rushes into the water to track him. The water is cool, sending a wave of goosebumps up his chest and down his arms, but he ignores the sensation, focusing on the water instead.
A pale body glows in the depths, twisting and flipping in obvious joy. Arctus flips once more and then heads up toward Liam. He's coming on fast but stops at the last second, a cold wave splashing up Liam's chest and into his eyes.
He flicks the water from his eyes and looks down. The face that hovers just beneath the surface is both familiar and completely foreign.
Arctus' ears have shifted into fins on the sides of his head, his eyes wide and lidless. On the sides of his neck, gills flutter against the push of the waves rushing up the narrow beach. Liam is only a dozen feet out, and he's already up to his thighs in the water. Webbed fingers reach for him and gently encourage him to walk forward. When the water is up to his neck, Arctus wraps arms around his waist and, with a massive push of his tail, sends them twenty feet out into the ocean, the teal waters churning beneath them.
Arctus' head pops out of the water, and Liam watches in fascination as his fins shrink and gills close. Arctus coughs up a bit of salt water, but then he smiles, wide and free.
And with a lot more teeth than Liam is used to.
"Gonna kiss me with that mouth?"
"Perhaps," Arctus replies with a snap of said sharp teeth.
With another push, they shoot even further from the shore. From the top, Arctus looks almost normal, but Liam can see the sunlight glimmering off his lithe tail.
"Can I touch your tail?"
"If you like."
His tone is neutral, but Liam hears the nervous undercurrent to the words. He cups Arctus' face with his hands and kisses him. They've graduated to open-mouthed kissing over the past few days, but Liam keeps this kiss chaste, not least because he doesn't want to shred his tongue.
"I'd like."
When Liam tries to move away, though, Arctus tightens his hold. "Only touch in downward strokes. My scales are sharp."
"Like a shark," Liam said with a grin. "Aye, love. I've been sailing for twenty years. I know to be careful with a big, bad predator like you."
He watches just long enough to see redness spread over pale cheeks before gently extracting himself from Arctus' hold and diving under the surface. Arctus comes with him and stretches out lengthwise in the water. His tail fin waves lazily in the water, keeping him stationary despite the waves, and sunlight shimmers through the water, adding to the luminous beauty of the massive appendage. Grayish-tan scales stretch from tail to Arctus' midsection, which morphs into pale skin as the tail shifts into Arctus' torso. Liam reaches out and skims a hand down what would be his hip if he were human. Arctus trembles under his touch.
Liam's lungs begin to burn, but he doesn't surface. He trails his hands down the long tail and smiles when Arctus grins at him, revealing those rows of sharp teeth. The transformation is magical, no doubt, but Liam finds himself paying special attention to the way the scales transition to thickened skin. It's not the skin he's gotten used to touching as they sailed around France and Spain; it's tough and hide-like, perfect for enduring the low temperatures and other hazards of the ocean depths. Silvered scars litter the toughened skin, but they only add to the mer's beauty, the marks telling their own stories of a hard-fought survival, even if Arctus isn't ready to reveal their origins.
Liam skims a hand up Arctus' chest before kicking his legs and surfacing with a gasp. Arctus' hands echo his movements, skimming up Liam's chest, though he doesn't surface. The gentle scrape of claws on his skin makes him shiver. With a few deft movements, Arctus turns them so Liam's lower half held up by Arctus tail, and his chest is held above the water by Arctus' hands. He looks down through the water to Arctus' sunlit and smiling face, fractured by the choppy surface but still beautiful.
A burst of movement startles a laugh from Liam, and he grabs at Arctus' forearms as they cut through the water. Arctus' tail sways up and down under his legs, and Liam is at once beguiled a mildly embarrassed at the way his body instantly reacts. He's fairly certain Arctus notices from the sudden grin he shoots Liam from under the water.
Arctus pulses his hands on Liam's chest, drawing his attention. He then feints turning them without actually pulling Liam under. Liam laughs and then nods. Fresh air pours into his lungs as he takes a deep breath.
The flip nearly startles him into a laugh, but he manages to hold on to his air. With them both under the water, Arctus' grin shines clear and brilliant as he pulls Liam closer, arms tight around his chest. Liam wraps his arms around Arctus' shoulders and presses their cheeks together.
The first massive flick of Arctus' tail sends them slicing through the water at a speed Liam can't fathom. Arctus pulls him along, diving deeper before rising back toward the surface. Liam keeps his head tilted up to keep his hair out of the way and watches over Arctus' muscle-bound shoulder as the blue-tinted world twists between light and dark. Fish flit around them, eager to get out of the way of a massive sea predator, but all Liam can see is the beauty of the moment—the sunlight, the sea, and the feel of water skimming over his naked skin.
For him, it's joy in its purest form. From the look on Arctus' face when Liam pulls back to kiss him on the cheek, he feels the same.
No wonder Arctus has been so eager to return to the ocean. If Liam could live like this, unhindered by pesky legs and lungs…
But he can't, and he's finally forced to tap on Arctus' arm and point up, his lungs burning.
They surface together, and Liam sucks in the cool, life-giving air until his chest stops heaving. As soon as he has the capacity for it, though, he laughs.
"Alright?" Arctus asks.
His ears are human once more, and the gills have sealed up. Liam makes a note to ask Arctus to let him watch the transition a few times just for the novelty of it.
"Never better!" Liam assures him through his laughter.
They're further out from the shore than they should rightfully be, but there are no boats around them or people on the shore to catch them out. They frolic and play the rest of the afternoon, Liam allowing Arctus to pull him under the surface over and over until he's high on joy and the lack of oxygen.
As the sun descends toward the horizon, Arctus pulls them closer to the shore. He glances out to the ocean a few times, though, and Liam knows Arctus' well enough by now to guess what he's longing for.
"Set me up on the sand bar and go for a dive if you'd like, love. We've got time."
Arctus blinks and studies his face before breaking out into another wide grin. "I won't be long."
Once set on the sand bar as requested, Liam watches Arctus flip around and disappear into the depths. As he wades back to shore, his stomach rumbles, and he eagerly digs into his pack, setting out a blanket and containers of food. The sea breeze is almost cold against his wet skin in spite of the heat of the late afternoon sun, and he closes his eyes, allowing the joy of the peaceful moment to permeate his body.
By the time Arctus' head pops out of the water, followed by a fully human torso and thick legs, Liam has sated his hunger. Arctus' body is languid with joy, his expression soft and smiling. He plops down on the blanket and then proceeds to tackle Liam, pressing his wet, naked body into Liam's formerly dry one.
But his mouth is warm as his kisses Liam, passion leaking from his relaxed limbs. He rolls so Liam is on top and startles a half moan, half gasp from him when his big hands cup Liam's ass, cold fingers digging into the sun warmed flesh.
It's a first for them, but it's not unwelcome. Far from it. His body reacts, and he grins into Arctus' mouth as an answering hardness forms against his pelvis. He gives an experimental roll of his hips.
Arctus moans into Liam's mouth, but he doesn't break away. And when Liam rolls his hips again, Arctus grasps him tighter, encouraging the movement. They quickly find a rhythm, lips slipping apart as they gasp for air. Liam's head swims from the pleasure, syrupy sweet and all-encompassing. His fingers grasp at Arctus' hair, his face, his shoulders as he chases the sensation building with every roll of his hips.
Between the illicit nature of the act and the novelty of their first truly intimate moment together, the end comes quickly for them both. Liam collapses on top of Arctus, who hums with a mixture satisfaction and mild disgust.
"This is much messier on land than in the water."
"Thought you said you hadn't done this before," Liam mumbles in a teasing tone.
"That doesn't mean I've never pleasured myself."
Liam hums a languid laugh… and then screeches as Arctus leaps up, still holding Liam pressed against him, and runs back into the sea. A play fight follows as they wrestle and dunk each other, and though Liam is a brawny man, he can't match Arctus' power even as a human. Thoroughly rinsed and fully wet all over again, he escapes Arctus' grasp and returns to the blanket.
When Arctus joins him again, he offers the other half of the meal he brought, but Arctus raises a hand to decline before patting his belly. "I ate my fill already."
Liam blinks as Arctus' smile grows into a grin that's all teeth. The ghost image of sharp teeth in that same mouth flashes through Liam's mind, and he grins back.
"Isn't that convenient? We should head back anyway. Don't want to be caught out here after dark."
They pack up and dress, catching each other's gazes and smiling the whole time. The Queen awaits them in the bay, and after a day or two of meeting up with their usual buyers and sellers, they'll set off to sail along the North African coast all the way to Egypt before heading back along the coasts of Turkey, Greece, and Italy. Even better, Arctus won't have to deny himself the pleasure of his daily—or nightly—swims anymore. If they're lucky, they'll have many more afternoons like today to play and swim and simply enjoy each other's company.
Before they set out toward the ship, Arctus grasps Liam's hand, pulling him into an embrace. He gently kisses Liam and then hugs him tightly.
"Thank you for this. For today. I needed it."
"I don't ever want the Queen to feel like a prison to you. If things aren't working, tell me, and we'll find a way to make it better. Aye?"
Arctus pulls back, a much gentler smile on his lips. One might even call it affectionate. It's a bit incongruous with his typically stoic expression, but today has been a revelation of more than just pleasure and joy.
A warmth grows in Liam's chest, and he knows what it means. But he also has no plans to curb the sensation.
Let love come. Let it consume him.
He'll take all Arctus is willing to offer, and gladly.
As they begin their walk back to the ship, hand in hand, Liam knows only that the future looks brighter than it's ever been. The two of them, together, living their lives as one.
--
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An original short story of love on the high seas - now with a sequel, Two Become One!
Relationship: Original M/M
Rating: Teen
Summary: After a disillusioned merman breaks through his hatred for humanity to save a handsome ship captain, he becomes enamored with the brave captain’s beauty and brash confidence.
Lucky for him, the feeling is mutual.
--
Golden light flashes above the surface of the ocean in a facsimile of a lightning storm, so bright against the night sky that they pierce through the depths to draw Arctus’ attention. He pauses in his journey from the Atlantic toward the North Sea to watch two wooden bellies plow through otherwise placid water.
When the fight is over, there will be another ship cluttering the ocean floor.
He shakes his head and prepares to swim on when he sees something fall from one of the passing ships. As it sinks into the abyss, the ship races away, bombarding its foe with another volley of canon fire and leaving the object to be claimed by the sea.
Arctus considers the object as it sinks. Bitter experience has taught him to avoid humans, but he does enjoy picking over lost ships and claiming their treasures for himself. He doesn’t have the patience to wait for the losing ship to sink—depending on the damage, it could take hours—but this object, whatever it is, could be something interesting to add to his growing collection. He flips his shark-like tail to move closer, using his sensitive eyes and the soft glow of a ship catching fire to peer through the dark ocean. A blot of white appears and resolves into a rectangle shape with two lines projecting from the sides and two more from the bottom—
Arctus flips his tail forward to stop his movement as he realizes it’s not a lost piece of treasure but a person falling through the water. Likely a dead one from the sudden taste of blood in the water.
But as he continues to watch, air bubbles bleed from the human’s mouth. A rather lovely mouth, if he’s being honest. In fact, the human’s face is pleasing in general with a strong jaw, wide cheekbones and a straight nose leading to plump lips.
Arctus blinks.
Turns.
Swims away.
And yet, despite everything, his rusty conscience pokes at him. He’s only a few meters out when he groans and whips back around, swimming toward the sinking body with all the speed and agility of the shark his lower body his shaped after. He plows into the man, wraps his arms around his waist, and rises to the surface, lifting the man’s head above water while keeping his own underneath. The water is calm despite the ships so recently making waves, and Arctus pauses to compress the unconscious man’s chest between his hands, careful not to accidentally scrape the billowing linen or the fragile skin underneath with his claws. He pauses when he hears the muffled sound of coughing from lungs made for air instead of salt water.
The retching and choking gives way to a loud groan that reverberates in the human’s chest. Arctus lets go of the man, intending to swim away as quickly as possible.
The man slips back under. He struggles to swim, but he’s obviously too dazed from the bloody wound on his head to properly hold himself above the surface.
Arctus curses and doubles back. He grasps the man around the waist again and pushes him up and toward the belly of the ship that dropped him, now completing a tight, smooth arc in the water and heading straight for them. He decides he can get away with pushing the man toward the ship like some sort of playful sea creature and then swimming away. If the man doesn’t have his wits about him enough to swim after that, he can die.
He’s only a human, after all. Even is he is a pretty one.
The ship slows, oars pulling up and in, and a rowboat splashes into the water. Arctus give one final shove, pushing the man fully out of the water before diving deep.
When he’s sure he’s deep enough that human eyes can’t perceive him through the darkness, he pauses and looks up.
The man is still there, head thrust under water, eyes open and seeking. Arctus lets himself sink deeper.
Finally, the rowboat closes in on the man. Hands grasp and pull him out of the water. Arctus watches from the depths as the boat returns to the ship and is eventually lifted from the water.
He tells himself to turn away. To leave the scene where he’d nearly given himself away.
The ship begins to move eastward, sails out and oars pulled in.
He follows.
It’s unaccountable, this urge to ensure the man is well. He doesn’t even like humans. He’s seen nothing about this one to indicate he’s any different than the rest of his ilk. So he tell himself he’s just making sure the humans don’t suspect anything. The water glides around him as he swims toward the surface intent on doing something he hasn’t since his family was murdered. By humans. For nothing more than a bit of pocket change.
Yet he can’t seem to stop.
The water undulates in the foaming wake of the ship, and he allows it to cradle his body as he maintains speed just under the surface of the water. His world narrows to the sounds of the water sloshing against the side of the boat, the muffled shouts of the humans on board, the incremental tightening sensation in his chest.
He grits his sharp teeth, arguing with himself one last time against breaking a ten-year streak of never going to the surface.
With another growl, he flicks his tail and pops his head out of the water. His gills seal up on their own, and he has to smother a few coughs as he processes free air through lungs unused to the effort. His head fins shrink into his hair, and ears grow in their place, bringing the sounds of the surface to life. Everything is loud and sharp: waves, shouts, the faint roar of a burning ship in the distance. He almost dives back under, but a deep, rolling tone washes over him, gruff but comforting as a warm southern current.
Somehow he knows: It’s the sound of his voice.
“—sounds mad. But whatever it was… it saved me.”
“It was probably just a dolphin having some fun, Liam.”
“That tail didn’t look like any dolphin I’d ever seen. And the way it moved—fast and graceful? It was… breathtaking. Possibly the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
Liam. His name is Liam.
Arctus grabs a stray rope from the rowboat nestled belly-out against the side of the ship and pulls himself up to sit on top of the sideways boat. As he arranges his tail in a way that it won’t slap against the side of the boat, the other voice responds in a sarcastic tone.
“You and your flights of fancy. What then? Do you think you were miraculously saved by a mythical creature of the deep? Perhaps a mermaid?”
“I… I don’t know. All I know is I’ve spent my life on the sea, and I’ve never seen anything like it.”
Arctus carefully wraps his hands around the edge of the deck between the spindles in the railing and lifts himself higher. He wants to see the man speaking and better hear his graveled voice, no doubt roughened by the water so recently filling his lungs.
“Careful, Captain. You’ll have your crew thinking you’ve gone barmy.”
Arctus peeks over the edge of the deck. The two men, one drenched and one bone dry, stand between two staircases leading up to the raised back deck. Both are dressed in nothing more than linen shirts, breeches and boots, clearly drawn from their beds by the attack. The drenched man—the captain, Liam—gesticulates wildly as he responds to the other man’s accusations.
“I’m not barmy!” he hisses. “I know what I saw. And felt. Those were hands holding me up, Grey.”
Arctus’ blood curdles. He’s made a terrible mistake. And all for a pretty face. Before he can convince himself to leave, though, Grey steps closer to the captain and softens his voice, recapturing Arctus’ attention. He has to concentrate to hear the murmured words.
“When that final canon blast knocked you from the ship, the crew raged with grief. We were sure we were coming back to retrieve a dead body. Half the crew were already in mourning, the win against the pirates more revenge than anything worth celebrating. Then, against all odds, you were alive and kicking.” Grey takes a step closer, and lowers his voice almost beyond Arctus’ ability to hear. “Whatever happened, you need rest. With that knock to your head and your wet lungs, you’ll be lucky if you don’t take ill. Don’t make them worry more for you than they have to, aye?”
Liam opens his mouth as if he’s going to argue, but when Grey’s hand lands on his shoulder, he pauses. His shoulders slump.
“Aye. You’re right. Just… give me a moment to clear my head.”
Liam starts moving toward where Arctus is pressed against the side of the ship. Arctus lowers himself back to sitting on the side of the rowboat as quickly and quietly as possible, but a sigh freezes him in place. Slowly, he turns his head to look up.
The sky above is awash in an arc of brilliant starlight, and the familiar beauty sends painful memories dancing across Arctus’ mind: throwing his niece into the air on dark nights and watching her form black out the swath of celestial clouds before splashing back into the sea; lying back against soft grass and staring at the stars with his brother, the weight of gravity no longer a strange sensation after living on land so long; taking one final look at the sky and cursing its beauty as the sea foam washes away the blood on his hands.
Diving deep and never looking back.
Until now.
The dim light of a nearby lantern lights the Liam’s face, his strong jaw sharply defined against a backdrop of stars. His skin is tanned from days working in the sun, and his damp black hair hangs thick around his neck and over his ears. Strong hands curl over the railing, gripping the wood tightly as pale, bright eyes—blue or green, or maybe gray—scan the dark horizon.
But he’s beautiful in more than just aesthetics. A lesser man would not be upright and walking after a blow to the head and nearly drowning. Arctus finds himself intrigued in spite of his hesitation.
He stares.
Memorizes.
Yearns.
For what, he’s unsure. His brother took a human wife, and together they had a half human daughter. But Arctus has never seen the appeal in women, mer or human. He stays as far away from land as he does the depths where the merfolk build their colonies—the place he and his brother were forced to flee from to escape the cruelty of their mother.
Yet this man compels him with soft words and unchecked admiration. He’s never heard anyone speak of him in such a complementary way. It’s enough to plant a seed of discontent for his transient life, always moving.
Always alone.
He’s certainly never felt this soft fluttering in his chest.
A fluttering that turns to frozen panic when Liam sighs deeply and looks down.
Their eyes meet. The captain blinks several times in rapid succession, eyes widening and mouth dropping open in a soft “o” of surprise.
Arctus drops into the ocean and swims like the great leviathans of the deep themselves are chasing him.
.
It takes two more chance encounters with Liam’s ship—the Queen of the Sea—for him to realize they are traveling in the same direction. He remembers the shape of the ship’s belly, so the first time, he avoids the ship entirely, no matter the way his curiosity and that powerful yearning pricks at him. The second time, he only pops his head out of the water long enough to hear a familiar brogue skimming over the waters as Liam orders his crew to adjust the sails. Something eases in Arctus’ chest at the sound of the captain alive and well, and he ducks back under water with a grumble, swimming ahead as fast as he can.
As he rises from the depths after finding a safe place to sleep, he comes upon the ship a third time. The early night hours of the summer season are calm when he breaks the surface, the waves small and lazy in the slight breeze. The sky is bright by comparison due to the gibbous moon hanging high in the sky, and his eyes adjust accordingly.
He dares to swims closer.
It’s folly. Madness. He cannot understand why a man he doesn’t know compels him to act so out of character.
He needs to understand.
This time, he hauls himself up the back of the ship to a row of windows standing open to the cool ocean breeze. The room beyond is dark, and as he pulls his heavy body upward to peek over the sill, he finds himself holding his breath in anticipation.
A quick scan of the room confirms no one is inside, but he can tell it’s the captain’s quarters by the both the location and the sheer extravagance of space. In addition to a wide bed beneath the windows, the room is full of things he hasn’t seen in almost a decade—books, maps, wood carvings, rugs, linens, and a host of other things that usually die a quick death in the harsh ocean waters. The most alluring of them are the art works displayed on any space that isn’t a window, door, or cupboard. Landscapes, portraits, still lifes and sketches adorn the room, begging him to come inside for a closer look.
But the windows are too narrow to admit his mer form. A small voice in the back of his mind whispers that the window would be more than wide enough for his human form.
Arctus balks so hard he physically drops down, only holding on to the top of the sill with his clawed fingertips.
No. There’s no way he could do something so foolish. Even a quick look to sate his burning curiosity is risking too much.
Drop. Drop now. Drop into the ocean and swim away.
His claws remain firmly entrenched in the sill. On the deck above, a shipman calls out to another in greeting and remarks on the beautiful, breezy night. As if on cue, a stronger gust of wind catches Arctus’ tail, twisting him around and straining his arms.
It’s too dangerous. He’ll be caught naked and without his sharp teeth and claws. Not that those claws would be worth much on land.
His spiral is interrupted by the sound of a door opening and a familiar voice humming a soft tune. The glow of a dim light bounces off the ceiling, jerking in rhythm with the captain’s steps. A pause in the steps brings a brighter, stable glow, and the humming comes closer.
Drop. Drop now, before it’s too la—
The humming and the steps come to an abrupt halt.
Arctus’ heart begins to race.
“Oh.”
The word is nothing more than a soft exhale, almost drowned out by the sloshing of the ship cutting through the waves. Arctus begs his fingers to unclench and let him fall away, but they remain stubbornly frozen.
As if sensing his intentions, Liam’s breathless voice cuts through the gathering tension. “Don’t go. Please.”
Arctus presses his lips together. He has no intention of speaking to this man—of betraying more mer secrets to someone he doesn’t know—but a soft shuffle sends a jolt of panic through his limbs.
“Don’t come any closer,” he growls.
After all, he holds all the power in this interaction. All he needs to do is let go.
The shuffling stops immediately. “I won’t,” Liam says through a shaking breath. “I’ll stay right here. Just… don’t go.”
Arctus’ heart thunders in his chest, but he keeps his mouth shut. The chorus in his head screaming at him to drop reaches a fever pitch before Liam finally speaks again.
“I didn’t tell anyone about you,” he says in a hurried tone. “After I saw you that night, I didn’t say a word, even to my first mate.”
Arctus’ intentions scatter to the wind. “Why?”
“Because I didn’t want anyone else to know. It felt like you were a secret just for me. And because… Because I hoped you might come back.”
Is it possible that this human captain feels it, too? This deep yearning for something inexplicable? Arctus licks his drying lips, suddenly desperate for something to say.
“I like the paintings,” he blurts out.
Shaky, disbelieving laughter floats over the sill. “The paintings?”
Arctus frowns. “Yes. The art. On the walls?”
“Oh. Oh, thank you. I tried to be an artist once upon a time. Didn’t work out but I’ve kept up the habit.”
Arctus blinks as he realizes Liam doesn’t just own the art; he made it.
Another gust of wind sends him twisting, his tail slapping against the side of the ship with a too-loud crack. His arms tremble with the strain. His body is too heavy even for his muscled arms; he isn’t going to be able to hold on much longer.
And yet.
He wants more.
Before he can speak, however, Liam continues, “I tried to draw you, you know? It’s mostly just your eyes right now because it didn’t see much else.” He clears his throat, and there’s a soft scuff of a boot on the floor. “Maybe… maybe you could let me—“
The door opens again, and all Arctus knows is it’s someone other than Liam. His fingers find they can let go after all, and he flips in the air as his falls, diving soundlessly into the ship’s wake.
.
“You’re back.”
Arctus nearly drops off the sill at the sound of Liam’s voice so close. “Don’t—”
“I won’t. I won’t look. Though you have to know it’s killing me. You’re…” A hard swallow reaches Arctus ears. “You’re very beautiful.”
“You said you barely saw me.”
“It was enough,” Liam says in a strangely wistful tone.
Arctus blinks. The waxing gibbous moon is close to full, and he knows if Liam leaned over the edge of the sill, he would have a close up view of his wide eyes and strong jaw. He would be able to see Liam as much as Liam would be able to see him.
And yet he can’t quite convince himself to take the risk.
He’s been following the ship all day, listening for Liam’s brogue over the waves and fighting with himself over delaying his own trip in favor of this strange feeling in his chest. It’s not as if he’s truly needed anywhere. The trip across the North Sea to Norway is more a tradition than a need.
Something he used to do with his brother.
Another excuse to keep moving.
“What color are your eyes?” Arctus asks.
“My eyes? They’re blue. You?”
“I thought they were black, but my brother always told me they were dark brown.”
“Brother? You have family, then?”
“Had.”
A long pause follows, broken only by Liam’s soft curse. When he speaks again, it’s with a melancholy tone.
“Aye. Me too.”
Arctus’ sense of connection with Liam grows stronger. “It was a senseless thing. Highway robbers.”
“Highway?”
He realizes his mistake a moment too late. But how many has he already made? Does one more make a difference?
“This is not the only form my kind can take.”
“Oh.”
Liam’s breathless tone sends shivers down Arctus’ spine… and lower. The sensation is so unfamiliar and surprising, his fingers unclench.
For all Liam’s talk about gracefulness, Arctus flops into the water, and he’s too flustered to climb up again. Through the frothing waves of the ship’s wake, he looks up to find Liam practically hanging out the window, sharp gaze scanning the water. Another shudder runs through Arctus at the realization that he’s bare chested, the muscle and sinew of his thick arms on full display.
He sinks into the water and swims away.
.
The visits continue in much the same way for the next few days. Arctus learns about Liam’s past living in Britain and working his way up from a cabin boy to a captain in the navy. When the war ended, he tried to live on land for a time, but the water called to him. Rich off the spoils of war, Liam bought his merchant vessel and went back to his true love, the sea.
In return Arctus tells Liam in halting words of his past. Of the way he and his brother were treated by their mother and their escape from her clutches. Of the family his brother built and then lost in one fell swoop.
He doesn’t tell Liam of the blood on his hands as he lured the murderers to the water and ripped them apart with his hands and teeth. But from the quiet now permeating the air, he thinks that Liam must at least guess the fate of those highway men.
“We’re almost to London,” Liam says suddenly. “We’ll start the trip up the Thames tomorrow morning.”
It’s Arctus’ turn to utter a quiet, “oh.” He readjusts his fingers on the sill. The quiet lingers until Arctus can bear it no longer.
“How… how long will you be on land?”
Liam exhales long and slow. “A few weeks. Maybe months if we’re unlucky.”
“And then where will you go?”
“Oh, back to North Africa toward Egypt most likely. We have regular buyers for goods throughout the Mediterranean.” Liam continues in a more hesitant tone, “Before you go… will you at least tell me your name?”
“So you can call for me like a dog?” Arctus deadpans.
Liam knows him well enough to laugh. It’s a raw, beautiful sound. Arctus wants to hear it every day for the rest of his life.
Instead, he murmurs, “Arctus. My name is Arctus,” and drops into the sea.
.
The docks in London are a maze of people and scents both familiar and utterly repugnant. Rows upon rows of ships line the river docks, a jumble of masts and ropes and rolled up sails nearly blocking out the sun. Workers move back and forth among the ships and the stacks of cargo waiting to be loaded while others load cargo from the ships into wagons destined for the shops and homes in and around London.
Despite his size, Arctus slips through the crowd easily, his mind used to parsing patterns of movement and anticipating gaps. It helps that he’s a head taller than everyone else, too. He stops to ask for directions several times, but it’s not until he reaches the end of the docks that he begins to despair that he missed Liam’s departure.
His trip up the English coast was uneventful, but after raiding his treasure trove for a king’s ransom in jewels and gold—barely leaving a dent in the pile—he was faced with the task of getting himself properly attired and then across England to London. When presented with enough money, most people worked quickly and quietly without further questions, but even the best tailors can only sew so fast.
Everything has taken longer than he hoped, including convincing himself he hasn’t taken complete leave of his senses. He should simply drop everything and dive back in the water. He’s never been a fan of fresh water, but the Thames leads to the ocean quickly enough. Now that he’s here, though, the idea of giving up seems ludicrous. The loss of money doesn’t mean anything, but he’s put so much time and effort into—
“Sir? Begging your pardon, but I’d heard you might be looking for the Queen of the Sea?”
Arctus turns to find none other than the ship’s first mate, Grey smiling at him. Arctus blinks at him before remembering his manners. He gives him a nod and holds out his hand.
“Arctus Reynolds. And you are?”
“Silas Grey, first mate on the Queen. The ship is loaded up with cargo, so we anchored her out in the river to dissuade anyone from getting ideas. I’m sure you understand. Captain Wallace and I were about to head over, but old man Garner said you were looking for us.”
Arctus glances around but he doesn’t see Liam. “I was hoping to talk to your captain about a possible business opportunity.”
Grey’s smile is genial in the way of men who sniff money in the air. “In that case, Mr. Reynolds, let me make your introduction.”
Grey motions him to the side of the docks and down a stone stairway. A row of shorter docks comes into view as they round a corner, lined with fishing and row boats pushed up against a stone breakwater. The smell of humanity is even worse this close to the river. Arctus’ eyes water, and he tries to unobtrusively breathe through his mouth.
It’s all worth it, though, when Liam comes into view.
He’s more formally dressed than the last time Arctus saw him, wearing a fashionable suit with a beautifully tailored blue coat. He’s also loading small crates into a row boat, his cravat in disarray and his hat askew, so he doesn’t see them approach until they’re standing next to the boat. Liam shades his eyes and looks up at Grey.
“Ah, there you are. I was wondering if I was going to have to rescue you from Garner. And who’s your friend?”
Still squinting, Liam turns his gaze to Arctus. Grey says something—probably an introduction—but Arctus is too busy watching Liam’s furiously blue eyes widen like a couple of blowfish to register the words.
Liam takes a step forward in the boat, his gaze still fixed on Arctus.
He stumbles.
“Liam!” Grey calls, darting forward.
But the captain quickly catches himself, laughs, and then pulls himself up onto the dock. His smile fades as he seems to realize he’s the shorter of the two of them, and his throat bobs as he swallows. Almost like an afterthought, he shoves his hand toward Arctus.
“Mr. Reynolds is it?”
Liam’s words come out breathless, his wide eyes tracking over Arctus’ face and growing more awed by the second. In all the time Arctus spent swimming and then traveling in the carriage to London, he couldn’t decide if he hoped Liam would recognize him or not. Now, as they stare into each others’ eyes, he can firmly say that this is the best outcome.
He takes Liam’s hand and squeezes gently. His skin tingles where they touch.
“Am I crazy?” Liam whispers, as if to himself.
Instead of responding to that, Arctus says, “I have a proposition for you, Captain.”
“Hmm? Oh! Yes, of course.” Liam clears his throat and shoots his first mate a bright smile. “Load up that last crate, Grey, while I see what our new friend wants.”
Liam doesn’t wait for an answer. He lets go of Arctus’ hand only to press his palm against Arctus’ lower back as he leads them toward the inner wall. They duck between crates stacked against the stone wall, and Liam turns to face Arctus, though he keeps his head down as he removes his hat and runs a hand through his dark hair. Like his clothing, it’s much more fashionably styled, cropped short around his neck and ears, though the top is still a bit longer than fashion would dictate.
When Liam finally looks up, his gaze is full of hope and disbelief. Arctus swallows and manages a weak smile.
“I wish to book passage on your ship, Captain Wallace.”
And whatever Liam had been expecting, this clearly wasn’t it. His expression bends into confusion.
“But… you don’t need… uh…” Liam blinks up at Arctus, clears his throat, and starts again. “We’re not really in the business of taking on passengers, Mr. Reynolds. Do you even know where we’re going?”
“Last time we spoke, I believe you mentioned North Africa and Egypt.”
Liam’s eyes blow wide again, and he sucks in a deep, shaky breathe. “It was real, then? You’re really here? I didn’t hallucinate the whole thing?”
“I can prove it later if you wish, though I’d prefer to get as far away from the dirty water of the Thames as possible before reverting to a trick pony.”
Liam barks a laugh before quickly covering his mouth and spinning away. He paces away two steps, takes a few deep breaths, and then turns back with a helpless look on his face.
“But… why?”
“Because you said you wished to paint me.”
Liam’s laugh is quieter this time. Hesitant.
Hopeful.
He looks up at Arctus, his chest rising and falling with quick breaths, his gaze rapt.
“Aye. More than anything.”
Arctus’ heart leaps into his throat. A smile—a genuine smile the likes of which hasn’t been seen for a decade—curves his lips. He looks around to ensure they cannot be seen before reaching for Liam’s hand. The calluses on his fingers are rough and perfect as they glide over Arctus’ palm.
“Then let us go. The two of us. Together.”
Liam smiles back and squeezes his hand. The sounds and scents of the dock fade away as Arctus stares into Liam’s eyes and finds something he never thought to find again.
In that gaze as blue as an ocean and just as deep, he finds home.
and whining can solve more than just social media staff making dumb choices. Whine to your government. Whine a lot and Whine together, and you'll be amazed at what you can do!!
Whine to your local government! Public consultations are usually sparsely attended, so if you can just get s relatively small group together, you can control discourse on an issue
(Source)
The Department of Homeland Security is tapping Google and other tech companies / platforms (Meta, Reddit, Discord) to hand over the personal information of people criticizing ICE.
The DHS subpoenas include "legal requests for the names, email addresses, telephone numbers and other identifying data behind social media accounts that track or criticize the agency."
In one case, Google has been ordered to convey timestamps of a man's online history, including: "every known IP and physical address, his credit card, driver’s license, and Social Security numbers", etc.
They’re not required by law to comply: they are choosing to.
Big Tech companies have long pledged compliance to MAGA’s agenda—but the breadth and invasiveness of this DHS operation is significant.
As the scope of state suppression grows, so do the surveillance methods. (Basically, we're watching technofascism accelerate in real time.)
(Source)
So, if you haven't already, protect your content and identity by moving to more secure spaces—ideally with servers outside the US and backed by robust privacy legislation (e.g., GDPR).
The ACLU is offering legal rep to anyone affected by this. Please stay safe and protect others.
- the Ellipsus Team
thinking about the art of adapting book to screen and how it’s wildly undervalued and underestimated. some people love the original work and do their damndest to bring it to life exactly as it’s described on page. others understand the spirit of the story and characters and change certain things to make it work for a different medium without losing that spirit. then there are some people who think they can take a few plot points and name the characters the same, and to hell with anyone who’s pissed that it doesn’t have any of the features that made the source material interesting or beloved as long as they paid to watch it already.
