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[toastbutteregg]

wholesome tweets that will make your whole week (x)

[its-that-horrible-cat]

requested by @cats-of-the-opera 

[sarcasm-and-references]

my english class just finished gatsby

How’s it sporting, old sport? Do you think we should sport some old sport today, old sport? I, an old sport, would say this is sport, dear old sport.

[wishbzne-deactivated20210526]

we should be well prepared, mary oliver

[ID: “The way somebody comes back, but only in a dream.” end ID]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[bajn]

[cumaeansibyl]

tfw a male author’s male narrator is being a sexist ass but it’s too early in the book to know whether the character is supposed to be an ass or the author thinks this is a normal okay type of man to be

[raptorific]

Wonder Woman would probably be so heartbroken if she heard there were people who thought her feminism was trans-exclusionary

[raptorific]

I told you so.

[nentindo-deactivated20210501]

whenever i try to open this image google chrome just crashes, can someone just take a screenshot of the image

[a0n2-fb93p4zmv365zagdj641]

[seabornsystem-remade-deactivate]

[humilitymonth]

WONDER WOMAN IS TRANS

HALF THE AMAZONIANS ARE TRANS

[marquiis]

HALF THE AMAZONIANS ARE TRANS WONDER WOMAN IS A CANON TRANS LADY

[imfemalewarrior]

For all my trans followers, especially those who are Trans Women! Wonder Women is one of you and Themiscyra would welcome you with open arms! 

-FemaleWarrior, She/They 

[pr1nceshawn]

The Best ATM Withdrawal Defense

[alexanders-archives]

I’m here for women with powerful dogs!

[urocyonfox-deactivated20210104]

My land lady is a 90lb 88 year old woman with 5 full grown Rottweiler boys. They sit around her when she gardens and watch her like the secret service. If you show up to pay rent they all stand up and stand between you and her.

It’s intimidating to have 5 pony size boys all staring at you until she stands up realizes it’a you and walks to you.

My favorite part is she wades through them like swamp water saying in her cute old voice ‘move’ ‘move please’ and each one she nudges to move wags his whole body at her touch and stumbles out of the way like he’s been knocked over by a truck. It gives me life paying my rent.

[duskianfae-deactivated20210319]

I just saw these news that this brazilian 15 years old boy made a fake profile pretending to be a 14 years old girl

And with this profile, he baited a creepy old dude

And so they agree to meet at a nearby park during the night.

And the old dude goes there, expecting to find some naive girl to be preyed upon

only to find the 15 years old boy

dressed as SPIDER-MAN

AND DRESSED AS SPIDER-MAN

THE BOY KICKED THE DUDE’S ASS. LIKE. LEGIT KICK HIS ASS

HE HAD BRASS KNUCKLES

Of course, the creep wasn’t happy with it, and called the police on the spiderman kid. And when the police found the kid, you know what he did?

He said “that guys a pedo lol” and gave them a drive with all the evidence he collected thru the profile

Thank you, Spider-man. Thank you for your service.

[summery-captain]

YOU GO FELLOW BRAZILIAN SPIDERMAN

“Teenager dressed as spiderman beats up a suspect of pedophilia in Joaçaba”

“With great powers come great responsibilities”

[the-worm-man]

ABSOLUTELY PERFECT

[dankmemeuniversity]

[buildabitchworkshop-deactivated]

accidentally typing “teh” instead of “the”

[afeelgoodblog]

Blessed_Spooky Boi

[timesreading]

The Black Widow Movie needs to begin with Natasha’s funeral. I don’t care if it’s small or big; it needs to happen.

How it would get to her past is this: she has a will, ok? No way she doesn’t, she was an agent of shield and an avenger. The chances of dying are high, and Natasha strikes me as the person who is prepared for this kind of thing.

Anyway, part of the will says that [insert living Avenger here, preferably Clint] receives a letter. It’s a long letter, handwritten on several pieces of notebook paper, but cared for. This is our story. It’s a nice segway, and it allows the possibility of Natasha in the ‘present’ (whenever she wrote this) to narrate and give us an insight into her feelings. Get into her head if you will. I know that narration is not always the best, but it’s an option that could work and make sense narrative-wise.

I just want to see Natasha’s memory honored with a funeral scene. Let me know that the world hadn’t forgotten her in Tony’s shadow.

[medusabraids]

if i knew how to do backflips i wouldn’t know how to act i’d just be doing parkour everywhere like i’m a teen wolf character

[friendraichu]

Jane Fonda's 1970 mugshot after being wrongfully arrested for drug trafficking, and her 2019 arrest on Capitol Hill while protesting climate change.

[malwizard]

im translating russian memes for practice and i... theyre so fucking funny

me: *flips pillow over to the cold side and goes back to sleep*

nurse who's been watching me in a coma for the past 5 years: