Monologist @elymuliawati - Tumblr Blog

I never realized what a big deal that was. How amazing it is to find someone who wants to hear about all the things that go on in your head. You just think that things will stay the way they are. You never look up, in a moment that feels like every other moment in your life, and think, Soon this will be over. But I understand more now. About the way life works.

Nina LaCour, Hold Still (via thelovejournals)

thelovejournals

i need someone who knows how to stay.

Warsan Shire (via thelovejournals)

souhailbog-deactivated20240510

This was unreal By Staysinspired | More

samesounds-deactivated20260529

I wish I could find myself again. That old self I’ve lost, that one without a single scar made by you. No memories of you stitched right to the core. No trace of you on my lips. There’s not a day I don’t reminisce about us. You know, I wish I could retrace my steps and forget what happened. I wish I could go back in time, to that moment where you first started a conversation with me. I wish that I’ve had the guts to tell you back then to just leave me the fuck alone, because I have no idea that this pain is going to be too much for me to handle. I wish I never told you that I love you. How I wish I never did. Now I wish I could still remember that feeling of not being in love with you.

God, I wish I could feel that way again. (via samesounds)

wnq-writers

I know that it will never be easy for the both of us. I know that nothing lasts forever, even if we have already made promises to each other that we would. I know that anything could happen to us now, anything that could drag us down, burn us out, or tear us apart. And I know that we are both scared of the future, because we talk about it a lot, and we also live with the fear that all of these dreams we have for each other would just be dreams, and nothing more. We both know all of these things. This love is never painless, never perfect, and you know it. These are hard times, but I still have my faith, and I am putting all of it in us now. I hope it’s enough to help us see through everything. I hope it’s enough to open your eyes and see that I am still here, still fighting for this. Because I believe in us. I believe in us so much, and I know that you believe, too. At least, I hope you still do.

samesounds (via wordsnquotes)

😢

I find a hope that u may still feel the love we’ve ever shared. I dont know whether it means we still do love each other or it is just such a sign for i’m going crazy a little extreme than i should be.

#confused #love #despair

I still love you. I wanna tell you that. But i’m not sure if you still care.

tempxo

EXO: dating Chanyeol would include

• probs tripped over you as you were too short for his eye sight • will bust a tear if he sees you’re hurt, and keeps apologizing though he’s done no harm • so he’s like ok she’s alright and I didn’t kill her…wait what the heck I’ve never seen anyone this pretty what- • cue Chan stuttering over his words as he tries to get your number or convince you to see him again • ofc you can’t refuse, you can already tell he’s such a sweetheart • you’re always in awe of how sexy his voice sounds over the phone • sometimes just pausing and letting him talk about whatever this dork talks about • probably complaining about baekhyun tbh • speaking of the other guys • oml they’d love you to death!!! Esp baekhyun and suho bc you make this man so happy and he deserves the world for always working hard • ok so kyungsoo might be a lil hesitant to like you at first • or that’s what you assume. He’s actually very impressed that chanyeol picked someone as smart and lovely as you and he’ll warm up to you soon, don’t worry • staring at him as he gets lost in the music while playing the guitar • convinces you to sing as he strums along • always making fun of your height (no matter if you’re the same height or taller than him smh) • piggyback rides • laying your head on his tummy while watching movies • and he’d play with your hair, unaware of how good it feels when he moves his slender fingers and always making you fall asleep • crying together while watching goblin (esp when his song comes on omfg) • wrapping his long legs around you at night and having his head buried in your neck • randomly picking up your hand and playing with your fingers to get your attention • teaming with Kai and pranking him • getting you back by taking pictures of you in your sleep • but that’s not even payback bc you look hella cute and yeah he’s gonna save that in an album on his phone shh • almost getting kicked out of amusement parks bc he won’t stop playing until he wins you that stuffed toy • baekhyun third wheeling with yall bc he’s a loser and he’s all alone • sometimes having to shove him off chanyeol so you could cuddle him instead • becomes best friends with your parents and often calls your mom just to check in • cooks for you when you’re sick • cuddles you when you’re sick (puts on a mask so he doesn’t get sick too lmao) • makes out with you wherever he feels like it • and his lips will be stuck to yours until he’s decided to wait until you get home • will have you sitting on top of him so you’d both be more comfortable, and makeouts never turn into anything more unless you want to wink wink • gives you back massages and rubs your feet when you’re tired • sending you pictures of his outfits everyday when he’s gone and you hyping him up bc he always looks good wtf • stealing his hats and shirts • won’t even bother taking them back • hilarious inside jokes • spoils you with candy and sweets • teaching you to play the guitar and leaning in to kiss your neck every now and then • covering your cheek with ice cream then licking it wf • taking his glasses off and leaning in for a kiss • being proud af when the other achieves something • hugs are so warm and he’d hold you forever in his arms if he could • having the most caring, soft, thoughtful boyfriend ever so pls don’t let him go 🌹

elymuliawati

I DEFINITELY NEED HIM 😭😭😭

I tried to burn the bridge but the chance of you being there on the other side turned me back to the helpless fool and I don't wanna love you.

I Don't Wanna Love You, Krystal ft. Kim Joo Won

A Monolog by A Broken Soul

When u hurt me a while ago, I blame myself for letting u did that because of my unrecognized errors and mistakes.

When I thought I could handle the absence of u, I still blame myself for still devalueing me by the feeling I shouldn’t take.

This is how the way I simply ruin my own beloved soul in sorrow.

Remember, that my intention isn’t to make u feel guilty. Neither asking u to pay the countless tears I had lost for u. Since in my personal point of view, all the flaws are on me.

Here, I’m just too tired in preventing myself committing suicide using this overly overoveroverthinking brain and those sort of poisonous memories.

-EM

#poetry #poem #poet #poets on tumblr #brokenhearted

Selamat Lebaran... (Apa kabar?)

“Selamat lebaran juga, Res.” Antares menggumam di balik bantal. “Tinggal bales gitu aja, Lyr. Apa susahnya sih?” lanjutnya lirih.

Dan nasib bantal yang menyumpal seluruh wajahnya itu sekarang telah terkulai tak berdaya di lantai. Antares berhasil mendudukan raganya di atas kasur, namun tidak berhasil membebaskan jiwanya yang terkekang.

Terkekang rindu.

Antares meringis. Dia sadar, dia tidak religius. Dia juga tidak begitu filosofis. Tapi merasa tidak bahagia tepat di hari di mana seharusnya ia merayakan kemenangan jiwa bersama umat seagamanya hanya karena merindukan seseorang yang sudah hampir empat tahun menghilangkan diri itu… keterlaluan.

Di hari yang suci itu, Antares malah merasa nista. Apa-apaan?

Ia lirik lagi isi email yang dikirimnya tadi pagi. Dan email-email yang lain. Yang ia kirimkan ke alamat email yang sama. Yang tak kunjung mendapatkan jawaban.

“Lo tuh pindah negara atau pindah planet sih?! Atau pindah peradaban?”

Rengekannya berhenti. Dan siapa sangka cerita ini diakhiri dengan bertemunya sebuah ponsel dan bantal yang bernasib sama, tergeletak mengenaskan, setelah sebelumnya sama-sama melayang secara paksa.

#flashfic #fiksi #cerpen