pain is weakness leaving the body

Kayla | 24 | she/they

[emorat]

i know a lot of the mutuals i had back in the day and people i interacted with are no longer active BUT i still wanted to kind of make a little post about me coming back to tumblr fully again after so long!!! aaahhh

it'll still semi be a music central blog but i will be emphasizing more on the aesthetic and horror media related aspects of this blog. and the bands i talk about are largely gonna change because while i still listen to a lot of the stuff this blog use to be about (mcr, ptv, p!atd, etc.) I am much more into metalcore these days with a sprinkling of other stuff.

excited to see how this blog changes from when i was a teen. I don't think i'm going to delete anything. I just want to show an evolution of sorts to reflect. I think I am largely the same person I was.

I also want to make this an actual blog and post and share pics of myself and possibly my art! since i do draw. it might motivate me idk we'll see. I've always wanted to do look-books every month or chronicle my day to day outfits and i hate tik tok and don't like instagram so i feel like it would be nice here!

anyway the next couple of days i'm gonna clean out my follow list of inactive accounts and accounts that revolve around topics im no longer interested in. I'm also going to release a bunch of urls i've been hoarding from my bandom blog days when i use to change my name every other day. i'm pretty comfortable with emorat and don't plan on changing it.

no longer gonna tag my posts as personal and will start tagging them as "KB".

[thenwedied]

Uh oh! Daddy's younger boss yelled at him today. GO BACK 3 SPACES.

Widow's Bay | Episode 2 - Lodging

[inthedarktrees]

Okay, come on! Whoo! Party!

Kate O'Flynn as Patricia

“Beach Reads” | Widow’s Bay 1x04

[72848373626272]

[annafridacharlotte]

[sgt-dignam]

FROM | 4.06 - The Heart Is A Lonely Hunter

[nikish-l]

[gouged-doll]

[h-isforhome]

they don't tell you this but if ur really lonely for a long time, a hole starts forming in ur heart and the longer u feel lonely the bigger the hole gets and it doesn't matter if u feel less lonely when ur older bc the hole stays forever and ur life just grows around it. But the hole is always there.

[ceruleanheaven]

making up scenarios in my head and i keep behaving the way i do in real life

[emorat]

when u are trying to get a pro art job but you also fucking hate adobe and believe they are actually satan reincarnate. so ur like fuck it i'll just 🏴‍☠️ but then u remember that adobe still has access to all ur art via their cloud even if u do aaargg it. and can use it to train their AI and then ur like godddddd. I should just use other programs and lie on my resume right? right? fuuckkk.

[emorat]

and honestly like i hate adobe for sooo many reasons (getting rid of the single pay model entirely, integrating all apps into a cloud and then forcing u to agree to a ToS where they can just look at ur files and use them however u like) but my final straw was when i had my adobe subscription and i was going through some financial stress and decided to cancel it and they tried to make me pay a fee i couldn't afford.

The universe came in clutch tho and I lost my card and had to get it shut off and a new one ordered. I didn't input my new payment info i let the subscription keep bouncing back until they kindly fucked off. But it's crazy to have the only way to fucking let people unsubscribe from ur service is to literally have ur card shut off

[emorat]

when u are trying to get a pro art job but you also fucking hate adobe and believe they are actually satan reincarnate. so ur like fuck it i'll just 🏴‍☠️ but then u remember that adobe still has access to all ur art via their cloud even if u do aaargg it. and can use it to train their AI and then ur like godddddd. I should just use other programs and lie on my resume right? right? fuuckkk.

[imifos]

stab scene intimacy coordinator

[stamenpistil]

[justryingtovibe69]

[vajracchedika]

[evacuatingheaven]

Das Orgien Mysterien Theater, Hermann Nitsch