loser!

[zkac-deactivated20200610]

*makes a jerking off motion every time someone with authority talks*

[emptykept-blog]

  — self-knowledge questionnaire .

   trait: REVERENCE.  — One part of you dreams of giving yourself up – perhaps just for a while – to a hero or mentor. In the right circumstances you can flourish by letting go of your ego. In your inner life, reverence plays out as a willing submission to your own conscience. In the outside world, you might get frustrated searching for something worth believing in – a country, a person, a company – but you will always be open to feeling respect, admiration and wonder.

   trait: NEEDINESS.  — Being affirmed and nurtured by others is a central requirement for you to feel safe. This means you can be slow to warm up to other people, which is difficult because what you most need from them is their warmth. Yet you know how to be vulnerable: to let down your defences and accept that you need another person. This lack of pretence is a valuable trait, and ultimately more endearing than the macho efforts others make to deny their childlike sides.

   trait: SHYNESS.   — Part of you is gripped by the fear that you’ll launch into something and completely mess it up. The upside of this is wise caution: people are indeed often too rash, whereas you know, by instinct, that holding back can save you. Probably, you feel shame and self-disgust a bit too much. But when you do feel in your element, you act with a wisdom and sensitivity never found in people with thicker skins.

[ironinkpen]

forget slow burn romance, give me slow burn found family. give me enemies to friends to siblings. tired, weary old mentors learning to live again for their plucky young apprentices. heroes sharing apartments after world saving adventures because they’re so used to living with each other. dramatic “oh shit” moments where one gets kidnapped and the other realizes “god, that’s my kid.” i want to sit and watch in agony for thirty chapters while two idiots slowly adopt each other, someone get on it

[psichc-blog]

AM I A BAD PERSON: NO

AM I A GOOD PERSON: PENDING

[arandomthot]

[kyleehenke]

‪if I was a game dev i would include these mechanics in every rpg ever‬

‪1) u can hug ur teammates‬

‪2) u can pet every dog‬

[cowswap]

is this legal? who allowed this???

[emptykept-blog]

heronot.

          ❝          FAIR POINT. i think you’re pretty trustworthy, for the most part. you          haven’t really fucked me over just yet. plus, you’re pretty much my only… actual          friend, so i have no choice but to trust my dead body && my riches with you.          oh, good idea ! i gotta be ballin’ in the afterlife, too ! what would i do without           you ?? probably die && have no money. i forgot her name, she wasn’t that           iconic. but, yeah ! that’s totally us. living it up, even if i’m dead. well, that           doesn’t really make sense, does it ?? whatever. you get what i mean.           ❞

       “   — what if there is no afterlife? like, you die and i bury your body, but you don’t even know because you’re dead. just straight up, you’re fucking dead. i mean, rest in peace, dude, that’d kinda suck, but you wouldn’t really know. we should make some kind of death pact, just so we know. so, if you end up as a ghost, haunting the shit out of me, you can give me some kind of sign. not a sign like throwing a glass at me, that’d probably hurt, but write a note or something. that’d be pretty cool. i’d be pretty spooked, but still cool.   ”

[emptykept-blog]

icb coffeeshop au's are still so popular when office/co-worker au's are literally Right There

[emptykept-blog]

poetictragediies

     “ he doesn’t like to label himself, but he dabbles. why? you lookin’ for something? ”

       “   i was going to say because you’re dope, but, now i’m kinda regretting everything in my life up to this moment. — sorry about your dad... and, like, him not liking labels.   ”

[germsauce]

(x)

[emptykept-blog]

heronot.

         ❝          not really, i mean seeing hawaii would be cool. i’ve always wanted to          hawaii. it seems so chill && the beaches seem so nice && half of my wardrobe          is fucking hawaiian shirts, so… yeah… maybe you could bury my ghosty ass          under a palm tree so i’m always just hanging out in the shade. is there a travel          agent for the afterlife ? will they get me a cool little house by the beach that          ends up being time-shared with, like, eighty other people ? man, what an afterlife.          … or, you could entirely just fucking ditch my dead body, take the money, &&          fly to your dream vacation. i can’t really stop you when i’m on my casper shit.          ❞

       “   dude, don’t you trust me? — ditch your fucking dead as fuck body? i’m not a savage. i thought you knew me better than that. i might, like, use all your money to fly us both to hawaii, but i think it’s below even me to throw you somewhere & use your cash on just myself. maybe i could burn some of it for you to use in the afterlife, like the ancient egyptians used to do, and you could use that. for your time-share with your eighty other ghosts while i’m  — oh, shit, man, what’s the name of the girl in ‘casper’? that’s me. burying you under a palm tree while sipping a pina colada. ”

[emptykept-blog]

sasha is ... definitely That Idiot who tries to make instant noodles but doesn't know you need to put water in the pot.

[fairycosmos]

i appreciate mothman but if i was actually confronted w him i’d probably burst into tears. hes a fuckin giant moth my dudes what the FUCK

[heronot-deactivated20260522]

thanks i’ll take 12 / @emptykept !!! look at our kids !!!

[emptykept-blog]

heronot.

         ❝          THANKS, DUDE. i always knew i could trust you when i needed help          the most. if i die, like, tomorrow or something, i want you to take all the money          i’ve earned && use it to fuse me into a fucking diamond, wear me around          your neck && take me around the fuckin’ world. also, don’t forget to blaze it          like once a week so my ghost can get contact high.         ❞

       “   so — cremate you, fuse you into a diamond, travel, & light it up… does this mean you’ve got travel preferences for your afterlife? i’ve always fancied scotland, or i could just spend the rest of my life at tesco. your ghostly adventures are entirely up to you, buddy. maybe we could go and see some kind of afterlife travel agent. ”

[emptykept-blog]

heronot.

         ❝          i’m not kindly asking, i’m fucking BEGGING. hopefully that’s what does          it && i never have to return. one life is stressful enough, why would i do it          all over again ? i’m not some kind of sadist, man.          —— this is me trusting you with my dying wishes, by the way. if i fucking topple           over && die right here, i’ll haunt the fuck out of you if you don’t make sure my           body is a pile of ashes.          ❞

       “   don’t worry, your dying wish of being burnt to a crisp is safe with me. also, just asking, but in the event that this happens soon, or, like, in a week, where should i scatter you? i know this great place near this park, it looks like a nice, cozy place to spend eternity.   ”